Ask Christopher West
Since the early 90's, author and speaker Christopher West has devoted his life to spreading John Paul II's revolutionary teaching on human life, love, and sexuality: The Theology of the Body. His beloved wife Wendy, mother of their five children, has served as his confidante, friend, and support through these long years of ministry. In this podcast, Christopher and Wendy combine their wisdom to tackle the toughest questions dealing with vocation, sexuality, marriage, and the Catholic faith.
Episodes
Attracted to pregnant women, Rigorist Priest Quoting Saints on Sexual Intimacy, & How Wendy Coped with Christopher’s “Cluelessness”| ACW398
Questions answered this episode:How can you tell if you're looking at someone with lust or with proper reverence? I saw a beautiful woman during mass one day, and I just wanted to look at her and admire her beauty. But I feel like there's a fine line between awe and lust that I can't quite pinpoint. Or another example: for some reason, I find a woman's pregnancy attractive. But am
We're Engaged but Can't Stop Crossing the Line, Why Does the Church Care About Scattered Ashes?, & Why Did God Give Me These Desires? | ACW397
Questions answered this episode:My fiancé and I recently became engaged. I was in the seminary where I wrote my master's thesis on TOB, and my fiancé has also learned about it. We've been trying to live out TOB teachings in our engagement, which has been a true blessing. However, we keep on falling into lust. We've tried all sorts of mechanisms to prevent it, but we keep losing the bat
My C-Section Still Haunts Me, What Does the Church Say About Contraception After Rape?, & My OCD Makes Me Hurt Myself | ACW396
Questions answered this episode:In the Theology of the Body, you speak about how the female body reflects God's love through its capacity to receive, nurture, and bring forth life. After a traumatic first C-section, I struggle to understand how this truth applies to my story. Although I later had a second C-section, it's the trauma of that first birth I continue to carry. At times I feel m
Should I Keep My Chastity Streak?, Why Does Virginity Sound Holier Than My Marriage?, and Is Sex Okay When We Feel Maxed Out? | ACW395
Questions answered this episode:I'm a young man currently discerning the priesthood and applying to enter the seminary next year. For most of my life, I've struggled with lust and masturbation. Even though I'm in control today, I know this is a cross I have to bear for the rest of my life. What is your opinion on day counting or keeping streaks as an additional way of motivating myself
Deep sea diving into your spouse's heart, Theology of a newborn's first cry, and Financial help for vasectomy reversal | ACW394
Questions answered this episode:1. You talk on your podcast about how a spouse is vast and deep interiorly, using the analogy of deep sea diving. If you commit to exploring that interior life, you'll never be bored. My husband and I have been married for 11 years. Recently, some things from our pre-marriage days came up. That hurt deeply, but helped us grow deeper together. The past seems like
Finding a spiritual director without replacing your spouse, TOB & hunting, and Panic attack during the marital | ACW393
Questions answered this episode:1. I've been married for over 10 years. My spouse and I have a good solid faith filled relationship. Sometimes, however, the thought of having a spiritual director sounds interesting to me. I just wondered what spiritual direction looks like for a married individual. Part of me feels like having a spiritual director would take the place of sharing deep things wi
Spontaneous prayer with your boyfriend, The raw truth about fornication, and What to do when making love hurts. | ACW392
Questions answered this episode:I'm currently dating a good Catholic man. I feel we may be called to marriage, and a deepening of our prayer life together may help us better discern that call. We pray the rosary together every night, which has been a tremendous blessing. But I feel the need to expose my heart in prayer with him in a way that the rosary does not fully allow. I was not raised in
Were We Really Married That First Night?, My Boyfriend's Secret Lust Broke My Heart, and Should Boys Still Be Circumcised? | ACW391
Questions answered this episode:Suppose a couple marries in the Catholic Church but mutually agrees to use contraception initially, intending to have children later. On their wedding night, they engage in marital relations. After seven years, they stop using contraception and have two children. In this situation, would their marriage be considered consummated from the wedding night, even though th
Pre-wedding playfulness feels like pressure, How can a man be called bride?, and Processing my father’s suicide. | ACW390
Questions answered this episode:I’m engaged and will be married in August 2026. My fiancé and I both have sexual pasts, but we have waited and are continuing to wait to have sex for the first time in marriage. This has been very difficult. My fiancé has gotten frustrated with my response when he is trying to be playfully sexy. I don't want to venture too far down that path as it has gotten us
Dark fantasies threaten marriage, Did Jesus have a body before birth?, and Vaginismus fears | ACW389
Questions answered this episode:Hi Christopher and Wendy, this is Matt. I wrote previously regarding a season of deep relational pain and sexual brokenness in our marriage. First, we have to share a miracle. The sacrifice you suggested—asking the global community to fast for our healing—brought a new wine of healing and self-giving love that seemed impossible. We're now in a golden hour of int
Is Latin Mass superior?, He wants me in revealing clothes, and Coming back to Church risks my marriage. | ACW388
Questions answered this episode:I just wondered about Latin Masses in the Catholic Church. I live in the United States, and no one speaks Latin here, so I wondered what the draw is to go to Latin Masses. It feels like in Catholic circles those who go to Latin Masses are considered more Catholic. If God made our bodies and speaks to us through our bodies, shouldn't it be more helpful to go to a
Why is Jesus clothed on the Cross, I'm terrified my baby will see us, & I feel grossed out by intimacy | ACW387
Questions answered this episode:While meditating on the crucifixion, I wondered why our Lord is not completely nude in art portraying it. My research pointed to reverence for Christ and preserving his dignity, reading that he "voluntarily accepted humiliation, but it need not be perpetuated." While this makes sense, I wonder how to look at this through a TOB lens. Why does it feel irreve
Eight miscarriages echo Mary's grief, Is polygyny Biblical?, and When period cramps prompt masculine wishes. | ACW386
Questions answered this episode: I hope you can help connect the dots with something stirring in my heart. In your Marian mystery course, you discussed when the Bible mentions Jerusalem, it's ultimately a reference to Mary, and how a woman opening herself to conception participates in Mary's Fiat. Since then, I've suffered eight miscarriages. On Palm Sunday, hearing Jesus was entering
Enduring gossip of a former partner’s promiscuity, Losing physical affection after enforcing a strict kissing boundary, and Shifting from same-sex desires to fantasies. | ACW385
Questions answered this episode:In my previous relationship, we were trying to abstain from sex. I knew he was watching porn and working on that too. A week after breaking up, he started sleeping with someone else and since has been sleeping with many people. Word that I don't care to hear spreads quickly in a small town. I'm trying to identify the lie from the enemy in this. Right now, I
Crying through the liturgical year, Standing firm on chastity, and Healing from a boyfriend’s hidden lust. | ACW384
Questions answered this episode:“I cry every Christmas season when I reflect on the baby Jesus. Like if I imagine myself holding him. And it's not just at Christmas, I've also cried during Advent, Lent, Holy Week, especially the Easter Vigil, Easter Sunday, and Pentecost Sunday. Sometimes I cry more than the prophet Jeremiah. Do you think I'm experiencing the gift of tears or just some
Proving Recovery from Porn to a Partner, Re-evaluating Male Shirtlessness & The Ethics of Menstrual Cups | ACW383
Questions answered this episode:I want to fully understand Theology of the Body but struggle due to a history with porn addiction. Exposed at 13, I fell away from the Church and entered an ill-advised marriage where porn use was encouraged, ending in divorce. Now, by the grace of God, it’s been several months since I’ve slipped. Resources like the Matt Fradd show, Internal Family Systems, and Cove
Healing Sexual Performance Wounds, Wearing “Sexy” Attire in Marriage & How Find God’s Gaze | ACW382
Questions answered this episode:I have a question about Second Chronicles, chapter seven, verse fourteen, which says: 'If my people, who are called by my name, humble themselves, pray, seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and heal their land.' My question is: how do we seek God’s face? I hear it all the time, but I’m not sur
Finding Beauty in a Drooling Pope, the Sexual Desire of a Single Woman, and a Widow's Exhausting Loneliness. | ACW381
Questions answered this episode:As a teacher of Theology of the Body, I was presented with a picture of Pope John Paul II by a former student. Before seeing it, I hoped for an image of his younger, energetic self—skiing, hiking, or writing. However, it was a close-up of him as an elderly man, hunched in a chair. I felt a wave of disappointment, realizing I struggle to see the beauty in the entiret
Joyfully Surrender to a Crying Infant, Is God In Vulgar Art, & Trading Pornography For True Intimacy. | ACW380
Questions answered this episode:I’m a first-time mom to an almost six-month-old, and motherhood is both the most beautiful and difficult thing I’ve ever done. I struggle with knowing what it means to lay down my life as a parent. In other relationships, we’re taught to set healthy boundaries and ensure our needs are met, but in motherhood, even my basic needs—sleep, exercise, seeing friends—feel l
Does God Command Mutilation?, Struggling with feeling loved because of weight, & Why is Mary the Star of the Sea? | ACW379
Questions answered this episode:In Matthew 5:30, Jesus says, 'And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and cast it from you...' In the spirit of the theology of the body, the idea of cutting off one's own hand seems like a gross insult to God's image in which we are made. I can understand amputation for medical reasons, but I cannot help but think that sin is a matter o
Overcoming Marian barriers, Reviving a "dead battery" heart, & Navigating the morality of “life-saving sterilization” | ACW378
Questions answered this episode:I came into the Church about three years ago, and my fiancé is entering this Easter. He quickly came to know Mary, but it has been taking me some time. I buy her flowers and pray the Rosary, but I don’t seem to connect with her. In John, Jesus says, 'I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.' Yet there is the sa
My Mom Hates Her Body, Surprise Baby Shame, & Jesus as Bridegroom Feels Wrong | ACW377
Questions answered this episode:Growing up, my mom has always talked poorly about her body. As a kid, I remember her asking my dad if other women were attractive and making demeaning comments about women who weighed more than her. Now I’m engaged, and as she chooses a dress, she keeps saying she’ll lose 10 pounds and worries because my future mother-in-law is thinner. She didn’t have parents who d
Why Do Men Have Nipples, The Beautiful Girl Never Chose Me, How Do I Share Christ Without Being That Guy | ACW376
Questions answered this episode: Is there any insight through the lens of theology of the body as to why God gave male humans and male mammals nipples? It has always baffled me.When I was 14, I watched the first person I ever loved choose my best friend instead of me, right in front of my eyes. This event seared into my body a story, or perhaps a lie, which is: the most beautiful one will never ch
Is Suffering a Type of Spiritual Intercourse?, Anxious About Mutual Climax, How Do I Hear God About Marriage? | ACW375
Questions answered this episode:You often say the cross is the marriage bed. If Jesus took on all suffering there, can embracing our own suffering be a marital act? When we accept daily sufferings—from trauma to small annoyances—does that become, bluntly, a kind of spiritual intercourse? What would that mean practically? I’d love your thoughts.My husband and I have been married three years and hav
The Man’s Seed & Pregnancy, Why the Eucharist Awakens a Desire for Marriage, When a Fiancé’s Sexual Past Breaks Your Heart | ACW374
Questions answered this episode:I understand that the only place for a man’s seed is the woman’s garden, but what about during pregnancy? Since it’s not possible for the couple to conceive another child, I’m not sure if or why it would matter.I’ve always had a special devotion to Jesus in the Eucharist and knew from a young age that it is truly His body, blood, soul, and divinity. I receive Him wi
Must he reverse the vasectomy?, Consummation of Mary’s marriage, and Loving a friend with SSA without compromise | ACW373
–This episode is sponsored by Truthly–Questions answered this episode:A man in his 50s had a vasectomy years ago and, after a conversion, is now discerning marriage with a Catholic woman of childbearing age. Must he attempt a reversal for the marriage to be valid? If it’s possible and not life-threatening, should he try to restore his generative power? If it fails and he remains sterile, that woul
What Is a Soul, Premature Ejactulation & Moral Qualm, Should I Risk Rejection for Love? | ACW372
–This episode is sponsored by Truthly–Questions answered this episode:How do you put into words what a soul is, especially when explaining it to a child in light of theology of the body—that our bodies and souls are both important and are meant to be together in heaven one day?I struggle with premature ejaculation and, despite years of sincere effort in marriage, haven’t found a real solution. I w
Is sexual compatibility real?, Wanting more than a kiss, Exercises to stir up desire | ACW371
–This episode is sponsored by Truthly–Questions answered this episode: I am a single man in my twenties and have committed to reserving sex for marriage. People often try to dissuade me by bringing up “sexual compatibility,” telling stories of couples who waited and later divorced because they weren’t compatible in the marriage bed. I struggle to respond since I can’t speak from experience about w
When virility fades, Asking my boyfriend about porn usage, Dating someone without sexual desire | ACW370
–This episode is sponsored by Truthly–Questions answered this episode:I have been a consecrated man for 40 years. Through theology of the body, I came to understand that my masculinity was not denied by my vow of chastity, but lived in another way. I learned to integrate natural bodily movements and the struggle for purity into my path of sanctification. Recently, due to age, these experiences hav
Asking my husband to reverse his vasectomy, When bridegroom language feels abusive, What is appropriate within dating? | ACW369
–This episode is sponsored by Truthly–Questions answered this episode:About 10 years ago, my husband and I rushed into a vasectomy after my third child in 3.5 years and intense anxiety/depression. I wasn’t in favor, but agreed thinking he’d reverse it if we wanted more kids—then I learned he never intended to. For eight years I felt despair and our union felt unrepairable. In recent years, Christ
Why blood belongs inside, Physical abnormalities & the TOB ideal, My Husband’s Desire Feels Twisted | ACW368
–This episode is sponsored by Truthly–Questions answered this episode:Recently I had mole excision surgery that led me into some unexpected reflection through a TOB lens. I was awake with only local anesthesia and watched the doctor use a scalpel to cut into my skin. Seeing the blood flow out made me lightheaded and nauseous, and I wondered why many people feel queasy at the sight of blood. In TOB
My ‘early’ miscarriage feels unreal, Desire makes me spiral into fantasy, and Why didn’t they recognize risen Jesus? | ACW367
–This episode is sponsored by Truthly–Questions answered this episode:I’m experiencing my third very early miscarriage, and I’m having a lot of difficult feelings because the loss is so early. I never saw a doctor to confirm pregnancy—just a few days of faint positive tests that never got darker and eventually turned negative—and I’m dreading the coming bloodshed. I’m struggling with feeling like
My brother wants to be ‘Auntie’, God is letting my mom waste away, and TOB talk gets awkward in midwifery school | ACW366
–This episode is sponsored by Truthly–My wife and I have been married almost 1.5 years and we just had our first daughter 2.5 months ago. One challenge we’re struggling to discern is that my younger brother is transitioning from male to female and calling himself “Auntie” in front of my daughter. I love my brother dearly, and this has been a long journey tied to brokenness I and others caused when
Is JPII contradicting St. Paul on spousal authority?, Teaching TOB when church leaders resist, and My vasectomy haunts my marriage | ACW365
–This episode is sponsored by Truthly–Questions answered this episode: St. John Paul talks about woman being master of her own mystery—how a man must stand at the door and knock, then wait for her to open, even in marriage, respecting her right to reject his advances to the marital embrace. In light of this, how do we understand 1 Corinthians 7:4–5 (“the wife does not rule over her own body… Do no
When my students look like the walking dead, I’m no longer interested in the marital act, and Am I Loved as a Priest or as a Man?” | ACW364
–This episode is sponsored by Truthly–Questions answered this episode:I am a theology teacher of high school students at a Catholic school. How do I joyfully proclaim Theology of the Body—or any Church teaching—when my students look like the walking dead? A coworker calls them spiritually dead. They don’t seem to care and they fall asleep in class. Satan has used all of that to make me question wh
Getting married with same-sex attraction, His sexual past hurts me, and Am I a failure without a big Catholic family?| ACW363
–This episode is sponsored by Truthly–Questions answered this episode:There are many stories of Catholic men who experience same-sex attraction and go on to marry and have families, even though their predominant attraction remains toward men. Many encourage others not to dismiss marriage before exploring whether God could be calling them to it. I’m honestly confused. Would it be right for me to pu
When the marriage bed becomes a burden, When preventing cancer raises moral questions, When miscarriage shakes your faith in God’s power | ACW362
Questions answered this episode:I love marriage and my wife, but we’re facing our biggest challenge: understanding sex and its rightful place. We stayed chaste before marriage; I was a virgin and she’d been abstinent for years. I desire union daily, and while she enjoys our intimacy, she doesn’t need it as often, though she still wants affection. We’re trying to discern how often sex should happen
Can perverted songs be redeemed?, Can an engagement survive frustrated desire?, and Can unrequited love still be God’s will? | ACW361
Questions answered this episode:I’d like your opinion on popular songs that celebrate the pleasures of sexual union, like that Marvin Gaye song. Can their meaning—or the passions they stir—be redeemed within marriage? It seems many of these songs aren’t good in most contexts, especially those that objectify people. But are some of them acceptable for married couples to listen to privately, if the
Foolish for not chasing marriage?, Is our intimacy a sin, Are my natural arousals sinful? | ACW360
Questions answered this episode:I’m a 24-year-old single woman who has never dated. I want to be married, but it’s a passive desire—I’m content and open if something comes my way. I don’t ache for marriage the way others do, and I don’t feel called to chase it. People tell me I’m wasting my twenties and question if I even want a family. I do want marriage, just no one has interested me yet. I don’
Male fertility & TOB, Should I read things that trigger my sexual wounds?, and Exposure therapy for modesty? | ACW359
Questions answered this episode: Right now, I'm learning about cycles and fertility using the Creighton method. One main point is that the man is always fertile while the woman is infertile most of the time. I’m wondering if there’s a theology behind that—especially since the man typically initiates and is constantly fertile. What do you think is the significance of this?I'm dating and lov
When you can’t receive your parents’ advice, Male climax outside question, & Christ the Bridegroom for non-consecrated Christians | ACW358
Questions answered this episode:I admire my Catholic family, but I struggle to receive advice from my parents. I’m academically gifted and study philosophy, theology, and psychology of relationships, while they don’t share my passion for ideas. When they give advice, I often think, “I’ve already considered that,” or, “There’s a deeper understanding.” I know their long marriage brings wisdom, but I
Loving my husband after verbally abusive relationship, Friendship after bodily mutilation surgery, & Venerating icons with the body | ACW357
Questions answered this episode:I’ve been married for almost 25 years. My husband has been verbally abusive and sexually misused me, though we’re now on a path of healing and reconciliation. Because of the deep wounds, I haven’t been able to have sex with him since our separation a year and a half ago. I’m slowly learning forgiveness, but his anger over the lack of sex makes it hard. He says thing
Numb to desire, dating fast-track, and finding joy in painful martial embrace | ACW356
Questions answered this episode:I don't think I have numbed myself or shut down my desires, but I think I may have never learned how to be in touch with them. I don't ever feel aroused or even really desirous of anything. I thought it was because I was blessed with purity, chastity, and temperance, but I'm wondering if I'm actually lacking something or disordered because I don'
Is contraception blocking grace, can condoms be moral during chemotherapy, and what does same-sex attraction mean for my masculinity? | ACW355
Questions answered this episode:As I understand it, sacraments need the correct form and matter to be valid. What about marriage? I wonder if true marital sex is part of that form and matter, and if using contraception or not being open to life disrupts the grace that flows through the sacrament. In our marriage, we’ve experienced deep grace through healthy sexual intimacy and NFP, and I sense thi
How Much Should I Reveal About My Past, Is Pole Fitness Sinful?, and How Do We Survive New Parenthood? | ACW354
Questions answered this episode:1. I’m growing close to a woman from my parish, and our relationship may become romantic. I need to disclose my long history of solitary sin and pornography use, which I no longer struggle with, but I’ve recently remembered past acts and fantasies. I’ve taken these to prayer and confession, but I worry she will reject me if I share. What level of detail is prudent t
Why Do Monks Hide from the World If We’re Called to Communion?, Is My Wife Truly Open to God’s Will?, and Not Sure If I Can Love My Husband | ACW353
Questions answered this episode:Could you explain the purpose of cloistered monks and nuns in light of theology of the body? We’re made for relationships through our bodies, yet they live in isolation and silence. Is their life like priestly celibacy—foregoing something of this world for the sake of the kingdom?My wife and I had our first child 11 months ago, and I’ve been trying to honor her body
IVF shame and my children’s worth, a marriage without intimacy, family planning with diabetes | ACW352
Questions answered this episode:Before my reversion, my husband and I conceived both our children through IVF. Now I feel deep shame, even worrying my sin might harm them eternally. A friend once told me IVF babies don’t have souls, which horrified me. Do I need to tell my children how they were conceived, and if so, how do I do it without passing on my shame? What truth can I hold on to about the
When Priests Can’t Reach My Heart, Masturbation & Getting Engaged?, Is My Ache for Chris the Bridegroom Normal? | ACW351
Questions answered this episode: I’m struggling to find a spiritual director who can really speak to my heart. The priests I’ve met at the Institute understand integration deeply, but I can’t find anyone like that locally. My current director stays in the intellectual and rational, but I long to share my heart—its joys, sorrows, and complexities. How can I do that if I can’t find a priest who can
Is Heaven More Real Than Earth?, TOB & Eating Disorder & Masturbation, and Rolling Eyes at “Holy Sex”? | ACW350
Questions answered this episode:You said heaven is more real than this world, and Mary already lives there in her redeemed body. In prayer, I sometimes feel Jesus and Mary present, but not like it will be in heaven. How can the mystical dimension be more real than what I see daily? Can you give me concrete ways to live this spiritual reality now, not just in holy moments or in the future?I’ve stru
Seeing the Naked Body as a Physician, Knowing God's Will With Certainty, and St. Joseph in TOB | ACW349
Questions answered this episode:1. I was addicted to pornography until my mid-twenties but have lived chastely for 12 years. Still, I struggle with scars: working as a physician, I get tempted by seeing women’s bodies. I pray in those moments, but I still desire to look, searching for a “moral excuse.” I’ve been dating someone who knows in general, but I can’t tell her every time. Why hasn’t this
Marriage or religious life?, Heartbreak and the fear of never being chosen, Raising kids without shame about their bodies | ACW348
Questions answered this episode:For most of my young adulthood, I pictured myself married, but recently I’ve felt a pull toward religious life. It’s brought many tears, and I struggle with the thought of giving up the intimacy of marriage. Can you explain how Theology of the Body applies to religious sisters and how God fulfills our longing for intimacy in religious life?I dated a girl for almost
How much makeup is too much, can mental illness fit into marriage, what if my wife won’t heal with me | ACW347
Questions answered this episode:Five years ago I discovered Theology of the Body, and it transformed me. Since then, I’ve wrestled with balancing modesty and femininity. I’ve stopped self-tanning and wearing heavy makeup because they felt like a mask. As a single woman desiring marriage, I want to look my best but not rely on things that hide my true self. My mom says I should wear more makeup, es
When God Feels Silent, When Nudity Tests Purity, When Climax Comes Unexpectedly | ACW346
Questions answered this episode:You often say to bring desires to Jesus or Mary, but when I do, nothing happens. Prayer, stillness, and adoration haven’t helped. Years of silence have made me see Jesus less as a loving bridegroom and more as someone withholding, disappearing at my slightest mistake. I know that’s not who He is, but I can’t shake the image. I want to love God for Himself, not His g
Helping kids stay rooted in faith after divorce, Is God sexual?, Overcoming degrading fantasies in marriage| ACW345
Questions answered this episode:After divorcing my husband over his unhealed pornography addiction, my sons now stay with him and his civil wife. I’m seeking guidance on how to protect and mentor them spiritually amid confusing messages from their father.If God made us sexual and romantic in His image, and intimacy reflects the Trinity, why do you say God is not sexual?I struggle to be aroused wit
Apophatic prayer, Longing for a same sex person from my past, Husband with a closed heart after porn addiction | ACW344
Questions answered this episode:How does Theology of the Body relate to the apophatic tradition of imageless, silent prayer? If we're meant to go beyond concepts and detach even from meditation, how can a theology so rooted in the body inform contemplative prayer?Though I'm happily married, I still feel haunted by a deep emotional bond with a female friend from my past. Why does this longi
Sexual arousal in prayer, Did the Holy Spirit become a sperm?, Artist tempted by nude art | ACW343
Questions answered this episode:I’ve broken free from porn and masturbation since returning to the Church, but now I experience arousal during deep prayer. It distracts and disturbs me—how can I pray through it without shame or confusion?My kids ask: If Mary conceived by the Holy Spirit, did the Spirit become physical—like a sperm? How do I explain this?As a virgin in an art class drawing nude fig
Can violent men change, Can I grieve my boyfriend’s past, Does marriage distract us from God? | ACW342
Questions answered this episode:I’m a prosecutor working with men who’ve abused women. I speak to them about porn, objectification, and Love and Responsibility. What else should I say to reach hearts already hardened by violence?My boyfriend isn’t a virgin, but I am. He’s repented, but I still feel sad and conflicted. Am I allowed to grieve what we’ll never share?If marriage helps us grow in holin
What if your scars are part of heaven, when your wife never loves you back, does your sexual past ruin your future? | ACW341
Questions answered this episode:I've been reflecting on how God uses our wounds to reveal His glory. Could our scars remain in our glorified bodies, like Christ's, as signs of His redemptive love?I feel emotionally and spiritually neglected in my marriage. How can I love my wife like Christ when she won't respond?I converted to Catholicism after a painful sexual past and porn addiction. How do I h
Choosing Continence, Healing a Wife’s Wounded Heart, the Theology of Jeremiah’s Loincloth | ACW340
• Continence in Marriage – Why would some spouses adopt lifelong continence—living as “brother and sister”—instead of periodic abstinence, must both freely agree, and how does it square with openness to children and the call to holiness?• Infatuation & Healing – After 15 years and five kids, my wife confessed an intense infatuation with a friend. I fear my own lust and past contraceptive choic
He only has eyes for me, My body reacts and I feel guilty, I feel used and unseen in marriage | ACW339
I want a husband who only has eyes for me. Am I wrong for feeling hurt and insecure when men—especially married ones—speak lustfully about other women?I love my fiancée, but I feel guilty when my body reacts sexually during affection. Am I letting things go too far, or is this out of my control?My marriage feels one-sided and painful. I feel used in sex and emotionally unseen. Despite trying every
Is Physical Beauty a Distraction or a Gift?, Should I Refuse a Bridesmaid Dress That Violates My Modesty?, Is Trying to Conceive Killing Our Intimacy? | ACW338
If spiritual beauty is deeper and more important, does aesthetic beauty still have value? And why do we emphasize it with fashion or makeup?After embracing modesty through TOB, I feel convicted not to wear a revealing bridesmaid dress for a Catholic wedding. How do I honor my conscience without offending my cousin?Sex feels clinical and disconnected while trying to conceive. Am I wrong to want emo
Wendy’s Testimony, Rejected in the Bedroom, Haunted by Our Wedding Photos| ACW337
I missed the 2020 online conference and Wendy’s talk that deeply interests me. Also, I couldn’t attend the Mary course you personally recommended—will there be another chance?I long for intimacy, but my husband rejects my advances. It revives deep insecurities and leaves me lonely and ashamed. How do I carry this cross with love?Seeing our wedding photos reminds us of how broken we were. How can w
Why do our bodies suffer, can abstinence protect our marriage, and is hell the heartbreak of losing our Divine Spouse? | ACW336
I've faced physical suffering that leaves me asking why God created us so weak. My pain has taught me compassion, but I still struggle to understand its purpose. I've read Salvifici Doloris, but I need help connecting Theology of the Body to my suffering. Why does God allow this? What meaning is there in our bodily weakness?After our fourth child, my husband wants to space the next pregnan
When My Heart Shuts Down in the Bedroom, Losing Friends After Leaving a Toxic Relationship, My Toddler Thinks Confession Is a Wedding | ACW335
How can I open my heart emotionally to my wife during sex after a history of porn and brokenness?How do I heal and forgive after losing friends and community following a controlling relationship and new engagement?Is there a Theology of the Body insight in my toddler mistaking confession for a wedding?Resources:COURSE SCHEDULETOB Course Package DealCatechism Quote 2843---Ask Christopher West is a
Haunted by a Past Relationship, Wrestling with the Meaning of Death, Bringing God’s Beauty into the Psychology Classroom | ACW334
Why can’t I let go of a toxic past relationship and fully embrace attraction and presence in my marriage?What does it mean to die with dignity, and is it right to see death as something good or redeemed?How can I teach psychology through a Catholic lens and reveal God’s beauty in the human mind?Resources:COURSE SCHEDULEJPII Legacy Foundation WebsiteEating the SunriseAsk Christopher West is a weekl
Is God a Mother?, Can Modesty and Muscle Coexist?, Facing Marriage Without Fear | ACW333
Questions answered this episode:Can we call God “Mother” without being heretical?Is my friend’s bodybuilding lifestyle and public modesty truly compatible with Christian witness?How do I prepare for marriage without becoming anxious about its challenges?Resources:JPII Legacy Foundation WebsiteJoin our Patron Community!---Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body
What’s the deal with indulgences and scapulars, How do I live celibacy after divorce, Are beauty exercises vain? | ACW332
Questions answered this episode:Can indulgences and scapulars make sense through the lens of Theology of the Body?How can I embrace lifelong celibacy after my wife left me?Are appearance-focused exercises inherently vain or can they be good?ResourcesCOURSE SCHEDULEEating the SunriseFill These HeartsSexual Needs Into Prayer YouTube VideoChastity: Reconciliation of the SensesGod Is Beauty Book---Ask
Worried I’ll disappoint him on our wedding night, Still loving her after goodbye, Does heaven erase male and female? | ACW331
Questions answered this episode:How do I overcome fear and insecurity about sex before marriage, especially since I’m a virgin and my fiancé isn’t?How can I love someone well when she ended our relationship but I still care deeply for her?How do I reconcile Galatians 3:28 with TOB’s teaching that we remain male and female in eternity?ResourcesCOURSE SCHEDULELove & Responsibility YouTube Series
Preparing to Teach TOB to Protestants, Healing a Marriage After Hidden Porn Use, Can Couples Have Sex During a Woman’s Period | ACW330
Questions answered this episode:I work for a small Christian university... how can I prepare to teach Theology of the Body to a Protestant audience when JP2's writings feel dense and I'm limited in time and resources?After discovering my husband’s hidden struggles with pornography and masturbation, how can I walk with him toward a true relationship with Christ while dealing with my own feelings of
Death & God's Permissive Will, Church’s Teaching on Masturbation, and Is NFP Truly Open to Life? | ACW329
Questions answered this episode:At a recent funeral, people spoke about God's perfect timing in death, but I wondered, isn't death, the separation of body and soul, a result of the fall? Doesn't God's will have both a perfect and permissive side, given our fallen world and freedom to choose? Wouldn’t God prefer us to live forever, body and soul, rather than just our souls going to
"Is the single life part of God’s plan too?, How can I love my husband when I don’t desire him?, Should I tell my kids about my sexual past?" | ACW328
Questions answered this episode:How can I affirm the single life as a valid and holy vocation, especially for those who feel overlooked in typical vocation stories?As a wife with low sexual desire due to hormones (e.g., postpartum), is it okay to engage in intimacy for my husband's sake even if it's uncomfortable—and is it wrong to show enthusiasm I don’t truly feel?When teaching my kids a
My Husband Has ED & Low “Sex-Drive”, Will Sexual Sin Ruin Marriage?, & My Husband Struggles With Porn—Will This Ever End? | ACW327
Questions answered this episode:1. My husband and I are newly married and both committed to our faith. I came into marriage with a deep understanding of the sacredness of the marital embrace through TOB, but we quickly discovered I have a much higher sex drive, and he struggles with erectile dysfunction. It’s left me feeling rejected, unattractive, and alone—especially since women rarely talk abou
When Your Child Rejects Faith, Navigating NFP Fears, and Learning to Trust Men After Abuse | ACW326
Questions answered this episode:
Questions answered this episode:
My eldest son is nearly 20, and he told us 2 years ago that he doesn't believe in God, which was incredibly heartbreaking for my husband and me. He is, however, respectful of our faith. He has a girlfriend, and they have been dating for about 4 months. She's just moved to another state to study at a university, which is ab
Navigating Family Conflict Over NFP, Letting Go of a Love That Still Lingers, Finding Intimacy in a Celibate Marriage | ACW325
Questions answered this episode:
Dear Christopher and Wendy, thank you for all you do. For context, my husband and I are expecting a baby again for the third time in less than three years, despite our best efforts to practice NFP. I am exhausted and facing potentially serious health concerns. My parents have never understood our stance against contraception, despite being Catholic themselves, an
Struggling in the Marriage Bed, Resenting Other Mothers, and Attraction to Female Saints | ACW324
Questions answered this episode:
Hi, Christopher and Wendy, thank you for this podcast and your ministry. It has changed my life. I have a rather delicate question, but I guess I don't know whom else to turn to. I can help you. I've been married for a few years now to my wonderful bride. I have struggled with self-esteem and self-confidence issues since childhood, and that is still the c
Heartbreak and God's Plan, Morality of Body Hair and Medical Ethics, and Understanding Foreplay in Marriage | ACW323
Questions answered this episode:
I'm a 25-year-old man, called by God to marriage. Two years ago, I met a girl who helped in the same parish as me, and I fell in love with her. After a few months, we spoke about it, but she kindly rejected me. We lost contact, and I went through a deep crisis of faith. I felt abandoned, extremely and hopelessly alone. After a time, I came back to her city, a
Healing After Birth, Overcoming P*rn Shame in Marriage, and Making Theology of the Body Accessible | ACW322
Questions answered this episode:
I recently gave birth to our first baby. My plan going in was to have a natural, unmedicated birth. There's something beautiful, especially from a Catholic perspective, about the pain of childbirth that brings new life into the world, a reflection of Christ's suffering on the cross. Many of my Catholic friends have had this type of birth, and I came acros
Fantasies in the Marriage Bed, Finding God in Ice Cream, and Redeeming of Arousal | ACW321
Questions answered this episode:
I’m a woman in my 40’s and I’ve found it difficult to get in the mood with my husband unless I create fantasies in my head. These fantasies are usually of sexual situations I create that don’t involve my husband or in many cases even me. I’ll picture two nameless people in an intimate act. Sometimes one party is using another party or the other party is cheating
Love in an Abusive Marriage, Confessing Lust as a Woman, and “Same-Sex Vocation” | ACW320
Questions answered this episode:
My husband and I have been married for almost 3 years. Shortly after we got married, my husband became verbally and physically abusive. There’s such a disconnected between his professed love for me and the lived reality of our marriage. As his abusive behavior has continued, I’ve found myself walling off my heart more and more. Intellectually I know that a covena
Bodily Functions in Eden, Navigating Endometriosis, and Finding Confidence in Disability and Masculinity | ACW319
Questions answered this episode:
In the state of original innocence did Adam & Eve experience bodily functions like defecation and urination? If so, how would these have aligned with their original harmony and the perfection of creation. Sometimes these functions are uncomfortable or even painful.
For almost a year now I’ve been in a beautiful catholic relationship. We both love God and our
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