Be Gay Solve Crimes

Episode 17 - Sleuth (2007) Oct 14, 2026 4964 This week on Be Gay Solve Crimes, we take a trip down memory lane to the year 2007, and immediately remember why the hell we ran away from there. It's the toxically theatrical and theatrically toxic Sleuth, a film that no one saw, but we assume everyone who did went on to transition. Join us as we invent Lancashire Simlish, Nova returns to the Late Noughties with a baseball bat to give it a piece

[PREVIEW] Episode P - Fargo (Bonus Episode) Oct 7, 2026 631 You asked one question: Are the Be Gay Solve Crimes girlies ever going to cover a Coen brothers film? And after all this time, we finally answered. Oh yah. You betcha. Join us as Nova debates the best kind of walkie talkie sound effect, Mia gets very passionate about office feng shui, and Lucy completely butchers the pronunciation of Peter Stormare. To listen to the full version of this bonus ep

Episode 16 - The Pink Panther (1963) Sep 30, 2026 5569 This week on Be Gay Solve Crimes, we’re getting a deeper shade of pinko and somehow yet more pan about it for the first of many Inspector Clouseau films; it’s that maddeningly madcap sixties classic, The Pink Panther! Join us as discuss the best way to coax some feeling back into David Niven’s little blue acorn, get distracted by Lucy’s childhood trauma, and finally work out once and for all what

[PREVIEW] Episode O - Insomnia (Bonus Episode) Sep 23, 2026 474 It's Scandi Week on Be Gay Solve Crimes, and so we're catching a red-eye flight above the Arctic circle to the city that never sleeps (Norwegian), just in time to check out a dazzlingly depressing work of sunlit Scandinavian noir, a film so Norse they made it tworce, it’s Insomnia (1997) starring Stellan Scarsgård! Join us as Nova subtly tries to get Lucy to transform her into a musical jingle, Lu

Episode 15 - Clue (1985) featuring Victoria Scott! Sep 16, 2026 5958 This week on Be Gay Solve Crimes, we pay our respects to the late, great Tim Curry with a special episode on possibly the most famous adaptation of a board game ever, Clue! Join us as we welcome back our favourite Professional Automotive Journalist Victoria Scott of Tran Girlismo as a guest, Mia reveals the secrets of her shameful Swedish musical theatre-kid past and Lucy whips out her pitch perfe

[PREVIEW] Episode N - The Naked Gun (Bonus Episode) Sep 9, 2026 412 This week on Be Gay Solve Crimes, we're taking what will be the first of many looks at Lt. Frank Drebin to prove that cops and women DO mix, starting with The Naked Gun (1988)! Join us as Lucy succumbs to rapid onset face blindness, Mia finally finds the missing piece of her life’s most elusive jigsaw puzzle, and Nova gets us all on a Skyrim tangent so obscure that it might as well be considered i

Episode 14 - The Long Goodbye (1973) Sep 2, 2026 6516 This week on Be Gay Solve Crimes, we're going back to 1970s Los Angeles if you can imagine such a thing. It's the Raymond Chandler classic The Long Goodbye with our beloved work-husband Philip Marlowe! Join us as you hallucinate us all hosting a podcast for you, Nova outlines exactly which hobbies are sure signs of trans-femininity, Mia tells us about what it is about Mexico that gets her dog all

[PREVIEW] Episode M - Black Coal, Thin Ice (Bonus Episode) Aug 26, 2026 372 This week on Be Gay Solve Crimes, we welcome the Chinese century with our most Brackets Chinese detective movie yet. A film that might be described as “what if someone made Disco Elysium the movie but set in Heilongjiang instead of Estonia.” It’s Black Coal, Thin Ice (2014), a.k.a. Daylight Fireworks. Join us for a 2 hour extravaganza where we take a firm stance against the Nightcrawler Body-Cam s

Episode 13 - Sherlock Holmes (2009) Aug 19, 2026 5859 This week on Be Gay Solve Crimes, we thought it was about time we checked in on our Boy* in the Deerstalker**, and what better place to find him than Guy Ritchie's 2009 brawl-fest Sherlock Holmes (2009) starring the acclaimed actor Robert Downey's acclaimed actor son. Join us as Nova gets discombobulated by Hans Zimmer doing terrible things to a piano, Mia finally divulges her bedtime (so you can

[PREVIEW] Episode L - Rear Window (Bonus Episode) Aug 12, 2026 643 On this week's bonus episode of Be Gay Solve Crimes, we're getting voyeuristic about it Alfred Hitchcock-style with the curtain-twitching classic Rear Window (1954), featuring simultaneously the best dressed and worst dressed arm-chair sleuths we've yet seen. Join us as we give ourselves Grace Kelly dysphoria, Mia comes out swinging on behalf of Team "Rear Window Is Bad", Nova talks us through wha

Episode 12 - Hank Quinlan in Touch of Evil (1958) Jul 29, 2026 4799 This week on Be Gay Solve Crimes, we’re getting in touch with the evil side of detectives, where policing, repression, and even Hollywood makeup can get a shade too dark. That’s right, it’s Orson Welles’ Touch of Evil (1958). Join us as we all fangirl over one of our favourite honey-voiced filmmakers, Nova recounts the anecdote of the angriest she’s ever seen Lucy, Mia goes to war with a fly, and

[PREVIEW] Episode K - Who Framed Roger Rabbit, Featuring Devon! (Bonus Episode) Jul 22, 2026 516 On this extra special bonus episode of Be Gay Solve Crimes, we're joined by our dear friend Devon of Kill James Bond to talk about one of the most transgender detective films of all time, a movie we've been itching to do ever since we started this podcast, it's the hybrid cartoon film noir classic, Who Framed Roger Rabbit (1988). Join us as Nova activates theologian mode to explore the theologica

Episode 11 - The Nice Guys from The Nice Guys (2016) Jul 15, 2026 4315 This week on Be Gay Solve Crimes, we're boogying on down back to tinseltown for some 1970s crashout double act deliciousness, it's the eponymous "guys" from The Nice Guys (2016). Join us as we discover the fastest way of converting someone to Catholicism, the fastest way to convert someone to The Blue Man Group, and the fastest way to remind Lucy that she's lowkey kinda bisexual. If you want to he

[PREVIEW] Episode J - The Maltese Falcon (Bonus Episode) Jul 8, 2026 414 On this week’s Bonus Episode of Be Gay Solve Crimes, we’re on the hunt for a legendary movie, one of the best of all time, so we’re told. But when we find it, will it be everything that we hoped it would be? That’s right, we’re doing The Maltese Falcon! Join us as we get lost in a plot that pulls a 180° every single sentence, discuss the praxis of blowing kisses at cops, and we get a little sidetr

Episode 10 - Foster from Super Troopers (2001) Jul 1, 2026 4376 This week on Be Gay Solve Crimes, Nova rolls a natural twenty on the most insanely unlikely movie pull yet. It’s the exhaustively-memed early-00s stoner comedy Super Troopers, and for some reason it’s more transgender than we could have possibly guessed. Join us for Barefoot Cops, frozen bananas, sublimated homosexuality, and a guy eating a whole plate of cannabis. Hold on, wait, didn't we do that

[PREVIEW] Episode I - Doc and Bigfoot in Inherent Vice (Bonus Episode) Jun 24, 2026 501 On this bonus episode of Be Gay Solve Crimes, we turn on, tune in, and drop out for a groovy double-LP of an episode with two detectives for the price of one. That’s right, daddio, it’s Inherent Vice! Come join us as we give ourselves 1960s hippie dysphoria, discuss the best technique for eating a frozen banana, and calculate exactly how hench you’d have to be to body a toilet cistern lid to the s

Episode 9 - Mercy (2026) Jun 17, 2026 4720 This week on Be Gay Solve Crimes, we take a detour from the classics to have a proper gander at the copaganda screenwriters are making today. And it turns out, they don't make 'em like they used to. That's right, it’s the alarmingly recent and alarmingly cisgender Mercy (2026). Join us to see just how long it takes us to give up mashing a square peg into a round hole, Mia gives us advice on how to

[PREVIEW] Episode H - I from I, Robot (Bonus Episode) Jun 10, 2026 603 On this bonus episode of Be Gay Solve Crimes, we don our blood filled black leather converse all stars for a trip back to I, Robot (2004), based on some of Isaac Asimov's best sentences. Join us as we welcome Mia Mulder home and finally discover her opinions on Columbo, hear us explain to you to the family-unfriendly rules of The Shia LeBeouf Game, and enjoy the patreon-exclusive privilege of all

Episode 8 - Columbo from Columbo Jun 3, 2026 4698 This week on Be Gay Solve Crimes, we're joined by our dear friend Josh Boerman (host of Worst of All Possible Worlds and Ill Conceived!) for an episode all about that scruffiest of detectives, Columbo. Specifically in... uhh... [spinning a big wheel] ...Season 2, Episode 5? Requiem For A Falling Star? Join us as we dive into a feast of Old Hollywood Lesbianism, Lucy reveals exactly what would make

[PREVIEW] Episode G - BLADE RUNNER (Bonus Episode) May 27, 2026 569 On this Patreon exclusive bonus episode of Be Gay Solve Crimes, we're gonna keep riding this Philip K Dick train all the way into android town. That's right, it's the surprisingly sleepy BLADE RUNNER (1982). Join us as we discuss Harrison Ford's slutty little waist, Mia lays out a theory about Making The Pimp Hat work, Lucy discusses the literary legacy of Orc City and accidentally starts a fight

Episode 7 - Minority Report (2002) May 20, 2026 7055 This week on Be Gay Solve Crimes, we’re cruising on over to the noughties to watch the ever-prescient Steven Spielberg film Minority Report (2002), based on the classic novella by Philip K Dick. Join us for a vision of a future where we blow our entire Patreon budget on milk baths and pass the savings onto you, where a Colin Farrell can be too Catholic even for November Kelly, and how shaven a Tom

[PREVIEW] Episode F - Nick Valentine in Fallout 4 + Far Harbor (Bonus Episode) May 13, 2026 757 On this Patreon exclusive bonus episode of Be Gay Solve Crimes, we're checking in on our dear friend, the synth detective himself, Nick Valentine from Fallout 4 and Far Harbor. Join us as Lucy gets immediately sidetracked into talking about Fallout: New Vegas, Mia and Nova join forces to try and mod in a jerry-built judicial system to the post-apocalypse, and Nick Valentine gives us all some much

Episode 6 - Inspector Gadget 2 (2003) May 6, 2026 6125 This week on Be Gay Solve Crimes, we're leapfrogging right into Inspector Gadget 2! The one with the Girl Inspector Gadget, who looks remarkably like a friend of ours. Join us on the goopiest episode yet as we introduce you all to our new beloved cyborg co-host Robo-Nova, wade into a whole new world of viscous hot pink gunge to pick apart exactly in what ways a movie can be racist towards a car, a

[PREVIEW] Episode E - Nancy Drew feat. Victoria Scott (Bonus Episode) Apr 29, 2026 414 On this extra special Patreon exclusive bonus episode of Be Gay Solve Crimes, we're investigating the beloved all-american classic Nancy Drew, joined by our own beloved american class act and dear dear friend Victoria Scott, host of the podcast Tran Girlismo! Specifically, we're covering the 2007 eponymous film that literally none of us remembers existing. Join us as we give ourselves Precocious D

Episode 5 - Lisbeth Salander & Mikael Blomkvist in The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo (2005/2009/2011) Apr 22, 2026 6263 This week on Be Gay Solve Crimes, things are finally getting Swedish round here as we dig out the files on Stieg Larsson's posthumous novel Men Who Hate Women, and its two separate film adaptations; The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo, and The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo. But which one are we watching, I hear you ask? Yes. Could we have planned this better? Yes. Join us for a Scandinavian smorgasbord

[PREVIEW] Episode D - Who Shot Mr Burns? (Bonus Episode) Apr 15, 2026 540 On this Patreon exclusive bonus episode of Be Gay Solve Crimes, we blow the lid on a 30 year old case by analysing the classic Simpsons two parter 'Who Shot Mr Burns?' "But wait, I thought it was the baby?" Oh ho, my friend, I'm afraid you could not be wrongerer. Join us for an unexpected jazz extravaganza as we tap-dance over the minefield of Nova's competing podcast contractual obligations, wax

Episode 4 - Maigret in Maigret (2022) Apr 8, 2026 6851 Bonjour, détectives! This week on Be Gay Solve Crimes, we bring in Commissaire Jules Maigret for some much needed gender questioning. Specifically, the Georges Simenon novella Maigret and the Dead Girl, for which the best on-screen adaptation unfortunately stars the most Brought-In-For-Questioning actor we've yet encountered. Oui, nous regrettons tout. We've watched it so you don't have to. Join

[PREVIEW] Episode C - L.A. Noire (Bonus Episode) Apr 1, 2026 520 What? You thought Be Gay Solve Crimes were gonna take our sweet time getting round to this? You think we'd tease you like that? We've never been more serious about anything in our goddamn lives. That's right. You've waited long enough. It's time for L.A. Noire. It's like regular noir, but it has an e on the end because it's for girls. If you want access to the full episode, head on over to our Pat

Episode 3 - Miss Marple in A Murder Is Announced (2005) Mar 25, 2026 5376 This week on Be Gay Solve Crimes, we turn our interrogation lamp directly in the face of Miss Jane Marple. Specifically the achingly gay 2005 ITV adaptation of A Murder Is Announced. Join us as we give ourselves crippling 1940s Woman Dysphoria, watch the butchest of butch lesbians Spank The Hogs, and learn just how incestuous UK casting decisions can get. If you want to hear more Be Gay Solve Crim

[PREVIEW] Episode B - Silence of The Lambs (Bonus Episode) Mar 18, 2026 528 On this week's Bonus Episode of Be Gay Solve Crimes, we take a leaf out of the late great Hannibal Lecter's book and, tongues firmly in our cheeks, attempt to pin down that most curious of transphobic shapeshifters, Silence of the Lambs (1991). Available in full right now on our Patreon! Join us next week as we turn our magnifying glasses on Miss Marple in the 2005 ITV adaptation of A Murder Is A

Episode 2 - Hercule Poirot in Death On The Nile (1978) Mar 11, 2026 6524 This week on Be Gay Solve Crimes, our investigation brings us to Hercule Poirot in Death On The Nile (1978). Join us as we hunt down a League of Library Assassins, enlist Butch Maggie Smith to help us finally make the switch to injections, and watch Angela Lansbury down a crocodilian cocktail* to appease Sobek, God of Semen. *A croc-tail, if you will.** **We won't. For more Be Gay Solve Crimes, ch

[PREVIEW] Episode A - Disco Elysium (Bonus Episode) Mar 4, 2026 352 This week on Be Gay Solve Crimes we turn our magnifying glasses on Disco Elysium, setting out to prove once and for all that underneath all his baggage, Harrier du Bois may in fact have been Harrier du Girls all this time. If you want to hear the full version of this bonus episode, you can find it and all our future bonus episodes on our patreon for as little as £5 a month!

Episode 1 - Sherlock Holmes and The Woman In Green (1945) Feb 25, 2026 4802 Welcome to our new transfeminine detective podcast! Every episode, Mia Mulder (@Potatopolitics), November Kelly (@postoctobrist), and Lucy From Scotland (@absobloodylucy) interrogate a different piece of detective fiction in hopes of answering the greatest mystery of all: is being a detective a kind of trans? For our first episode, we are proud to present a truly inexplicable 1940s Sherlock Holmes

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