Home Podcasts Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel
Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel

Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel

Esther Perel Global Media 142 episodes Nov 9, 2026

Every Monday morning, step into the office of iconic psychotherapist Esther Perel and listen in as real people in search of insight bare the raw, intimate, and profound details of their stories. From breakups and open relationships to workplace conflicts and fractures in the family, it’s a place to hear our own stories reflected in the lives of others. Part of the Vox Media Podcast Network.

Episodes

I'll Still Be Your Financial Partner, But I'm Done Being Your Wife
I'll Still Be Your Financial Partner, But I'm Done Being Your Wife Nov 9, 2026 51:21 After a nearly forty-year relationship, they've decided to split. But given the many laws in America that favor married couples, they've decided to try an unconventional arrangement: living 300 miles apart but remaining legally married. They come to Esther wondering how, after decades of emotional enmeshment, they can disentangle their romantic connection while continuing to function like business
Twice Married, To Each Other
Twice Married, To Each Other Nov 2, 2026 56:12 This is a classic session of Where Should We Begin? They were married, divorced, and then married again. And with four kids between them, tensions run high. They fight about everything: the chores, the cats, who gets to tell who what to do. They come into the session with one story and Esther helps them write an alternate version. Producer’s Note: When our anonymous guests do a sessio
Is My Fantasy Ruining My Love Life?
Is My Fantasy Ruining My Love Life? Oct 26, 2026 54:02 After years of struggling to stay present during sex, one caller wonders if her fantasies are keeping her from the intimacy she longs for. The more she depends on fantasies of domination and humiliation, the more she questions what they mean about her and her relationships. Esther helps her explore the difference between fantasy and flight, and how sexual patterns can become a language for deeper
Can I Still Be a Good Man if I Leave?
Can I Still Be a Good Man if I Leave? Oct 19, 2026 59:59 After decades together, he wonders whether he can stay in a marriage where intimacy and connection has all but disappeared. He's touch-starved and lonely and questioning whether preserving the family unit for the sake of his young daughter, is worth the cost of losing himself. Esther helps him look beyond the question of whether to stay or leave and toward what he needs to feel alive and true to h
I Want You To Want Me
I Want You To Want Me Oct 12, 2026 53:35 Couples often struggle with gaps in their sex drives, but what does a couple do when one person has no desire for sex whatsoever? A married couple comes to Esther with this question: one of them has recently discovered that she's asexual, while the other craves sex as a primary form of connection. Is theirs an irreconcilable difference? Is there hope for their future, or should they accept that di
I Don't Mean to Be Mean, But...
I Don't Mean to Be Mean, But... Oct 5, 2026 1:06:15 This is a classic session of Where Should We Begin? She has no boundaries, he’s walled off. And their opposing communication styles cause immediate tension in this explosive session. So much so, that Esther finds herself adding to the chorus of angry voices. There might only be three people in this session, but Esther realizes she needs at least three more chairs for the in-laws whose voices and o
My Ex, His AI Girlfriend, And Our Kids
My Ex, His AI Girlfriend, And Our Kids Sep 28, 2026 53:21 After the end of a fifteen-year marriage, she is trying to make sense of something she never imagined would become part of her family's story: her ex-husband's love affair with an AI companion. As her children struggle to make sense of what is real and what isn't, she turns to Esther for guidance on how to keep them grounded without invalidating their experience. How do you help your children trus
Good Relationships Need Better Fights
Good Relationships Need Better Fights Sep 21, 2026 58:23 Conflict is not toxic or immoral. In fact, it's generative and the lifeblood of our relationships. It isn't something to avoid. It matters, and it can even bring us closer together. Priya Parker, author of The Art of Fighting, joins Esther to dig into how conflict can be a productive force in our relationships rather than something to fear. For more about Priya Parker and The Art of Fighting vi
How Many Times Can You Betray Me?
How Many Times Can You Betray Me? Sep 14, 2026 54:35 A married couple arrives at Esther’s office hoping to recover from a devastating rupture with his mother after the birth of their first child. But immediately their session reveals a longer, more complex history of betrayal within their relationship and within his larger family system. Having a child, and experiencing an absolute break from his abusive mother, finally disrupted the toxic dynamics
On Again/Off Again
On Again/Off Again Aug 31, 2026 53:12 This is a classic session of Where Should We Begin? They've been on and off for almost 20 years. While she takes care of his and their child, she wants to know that he's also there for her. He's been battling depression for years. And the shame that comes with it. Producer’s Note: When our anonymous guests do a session with Esther for the podcast, it is an act of generosity for eve
Will I Always Be Alone?
Will I Always Be Alone? Aug 24, 2026 49:11 He comes to Esther not with a singular question but with an overflow of words and unspoken truths. Betrayed by a once-supportive church and struggling to reconcile his desires with his emotions, he carries a loneliness that has followed him across continents. This session is all about naming. Naming the parts of his life, the feelings left unspoken, and the longings that ache in his heart. Esth
Can I Be Loved?
Can I Be Loved? Aug 17, 2026 37:20 A young woman writes to Esther asking why she is interested in someone emotionally unavailable. Despite efforts to break this pattern, she realizes that some of her behaviors are rooted in a deep sense of control and the need to feel worthy of her parents' sacrifices. Esther walks her through this need for control and how to reclaim a sense of independence. Esther Callings are a one time, 45-

Recommended