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Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel

Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel

Esther Perel Global Media 142 Episodes Jun 29, 2026

Every Monday morning, step into the office of iconic psychotherapist Esther Perel and listen in as real people in search of insight bare the raw, intimate, and profound details of their stories. From breakups and open relationships to workplace conflicts and fractures in the family, it’s a place to hear our own stories reflected in the lives of others. Part of the Vox Media Podcast Network.

Episodes

My Hero Complex Jun 29, 2026 2420 When his ex calls in the middle of a crisis, he finds himself pulled back into a familiar role: the rescuer. He's always been the one women confide in, the one who steps up, the one who proves he's a good man by making sure no one falls apart on his watch. It’s a hero complex he wears easily. If he’s needed, he feels powerful. If he’s not, he feels invisible. He’s the strong one, the reliable one,
20 Years Later, Esther Revisits Mating in Captivity Jun 22, 2026 2661 This week, Esther invites you into a conversation about desire, disruption, and what it means to stay alive to one another in a rapidly changing world. Recorded live at Sessions Live, Esther is joined by journalist and Head of Content at Esther Perel Global Media, Mary Alice Miller, for a look back on twenty years of Mating in Captivity and explore how our ideas about intimacy, desire, and rela
In This Relationship What Is "I" and What is "We"? Jun 15, 2026 2794 This is a classic session of Where Should We Begin? They grew up with traumatic backgrounds, met in college, immigrated to the US together. They've built stability and security, and now one of them longs for more freedom. Producer’s Note: When our anonymous guests do a session with Esther for the podcast, it is an act of generosity for everyone who listens. These sessions are meant not only t
Are You Abandoning Me or Am I Suffocating You? Jun 8, 2026 3085 Twin brothers come to Esther with a shared question: how do they break free from the conflict that has shaped their relationship for years? One feels smothered, the other abandoned, and together they are caught in a cycle of pursuit and withdrawal that neither knows how to escape. With Esther, they explore how to loosen the grip of old roles and find each other again, not just as twins, but as two
Love in the Time of AI with Kashmir Hill Jun 1, 2026 2995 A recent session was a threshold moment for Esther where she found herself doing couples therapy with a man and his AI companion. To explore the questions it raised, Esther sits down with New York Times technology reporter, Kashmir Hill, who has spent years reporting on the growing world of AI relationships. They explore the psychological pull of these systems, the design choices behind them, and
To Make Room for My Brother I Learned to Disappear May 18, 2026 3359 With her wedding just weeks away, a young woman calls Esther with a question she’s been carrying for most of her life: how do you allow yourself joy when you’ve learned to make yourself small? Growing up alongside a non-speaking autistic brother taught her to be vigilant, self-effacing, and attuned to everyone else’s needs. Joy and celebration have always come with guilt. As the wedding approaches
I Gave Him an Ultimatum. Now What? May 11, 2026 3494 A person gives their partner an ultimatum, and they fail to meet it. What happens then to the relationship? This couple comes to Esther with that question, wondering what future, if any, might be possible for them. A painful misalignment lies at the center of their polyamorous relationship. She wants to be an integrated part of his life, including his other partnerships; he wants to keep his relat
My Parents Got Divorced, So Why Am I Still in the Middle? May 4, 2026 3475 When a mom reaches out on her daughter’s behalf, an old family dynamic comes into focus. A woman finds herself caught between her two divorced parents, still playing the role of mediator and emotional caretaker. As she speaks with Esther, she starts to question what really belongs to her and what it has cost her to carry stories that were never hers to hold.Esther Callings are a one time, 45-60 mi
How To Start (Even When You Don't Know Where You're Going) Apr 27, 2026 3272 As work becomes the place we look for identity, stability, and meaning, the stakes feel higher than ever. Esther invites you in for a live conversation between friends, New York Times journalist Jodi Kantor and facilitator and author Priya Parker. A question echoes through the room: how do you start when you don’t know where you’re going? This is a conversation about uncertainty, ambition, and
Is This the Person I'm Meant to Be With? Apr 20, 2026 3378 They arrive in Esther’s office at a crossroads. A year ago, they decided to de-escalate their relationship: to transition from romantic partners to live-in roommates. In their decade-long relationship, they had become stuck in dysfunctional patterns and toxic behaviors. But they didn’t want to force a complete separation: they still loved each other, and they couldn’t afford to move out on their o
Wedding Woes About My Mom Apr 13, 2026 3059 She’s getting married soon, but before she walks down the aisle, she wants to walk toward her mother with more understanding. Years of complicated emotions since her parents’ divorce have built walls between them. With Esther’s insight, she learns how to acknowledge her own feelings, understand her mother’s defenses, and lay the groundwork for a more loving connection. Esther Callings are a one
Should I Have Another Baby? Apr 6, 2026 2735 When we become parents, many of us quietly promise ourselves that we won't be like our parents. We're going to do it differently. This week’s caller finds herself wrestling with a deeper question: Is her longing for another child born from genuine desire or from defiance? After a traumatic start to motherhood, she's now yearning for another child. But beneath that yearning lies the doubt: Am I doi

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