Dear Black Gay Men Podcast
Dear Black Gay Men Podcast is a weekly show that serves as a dopeness reminder for Black gay men. It features content from the creator's favorite content creators and is hosted by Jai The Gentleman. The podcast aims to uplift and inspire its listeners.
Episodes
Why Kevin Hart’s George Floyd Roast Defense Misses the Mark Entirely
What up, though? It’s Wednesday, and we are stepping out of our comfort zone on the Dear Black Gay Men Podcast to talk about a massive conversation taking over Black culture right now.If you’ve been anywhere on the internet lately, you know that Kevin Hart recently produced and hosted his own Netflix roast. While roasts are notorious for crossing the line, comedian Tony Hinchcliffe dropped a highl
True to Yourself: FloridaManJayy Explores Identity, Trans Attraction, and Black Queer Culture
What does it mean to navigate Black queer culture on your own terms? In the latest episode of the Dear Black Gay Men Podcast, host Jai The Gentleman sits down with YouTube content creator Florida Man Jayy for a raw, b******t-free conversation that challenges the boundaries of traditional labels.From discussing his viral storytime “My First Trans Encounter” to opening up about his journey with ther
Surviving Grayling Purnell: When “Love” Becomes Ownership
We are talking about adult content creator Grayling Purnell. He’s sparked intense backlash for a disturbing pattern: his young boyfriends keep getting his name permanently tattooed on their bodies—specifically their faces—allegedly within days of meeting him.Is It a Kink or Predatory Behavior?During the episode, Jai reacted to a video by creator JEiiNCLUSIVE, breaking down the red flags. In one cl
Is "Kink" Just Wypipo Sh**?
In the latest episode of the Dear Black Gay Men Podcast, host Jai The Gentleman dives deep into a topic often whispered about but rarely dissected with such raw honesty: the world of kink and fetish within the Black queer community.For too long, a pervasive myth has suggested that “kink” is a white space, while Black men are simply “freaky.” Jai challenges this narrative, arguing that Black men ar
Is There Still “Pride” in Black Pride? DC Pride Dramas and the Cost of Community
The latest episode of the Dear Black Gay Men Podcast didn’t hold back. Host Jai The Gentleman dove deep into the recent firestorm surrounding DC Black Pride and a major promoter misstep that has the internet in shambles. If you’ve been feeling like Pride is becoming more of a “pay-to-play” circuit than a celebration of our culture, this one is for you.The DC Pride Controversy: Centering Non-Black
Is Masculinity Dead? Redefining Black Manhood in 2026
What does it actually mean to be a man today? For too long, Black culture has defined masculinity by what it isn’t. We’ve been told it’s about having the deepest voice, the biggest muscles, or being the “exclusive vessel” for strength. But on this episode of the Dear Black Gay Men Podcast, host Jai The Gentleman asks the tough questions: Is masculinity dead? And if it is, do we even want to revive
Why We Reward Julez Smith but Reject EJ Johnson: The “Straight Man” Obsession
Is Black queer culture suffering from a fetish for straightness? This episode of Dear Black Gay Men Podcast, we’re diving into a major cultural contradiction that has Atlanta—and the internet—in an uproar.The Julez Smith DebacleThe conversation started at Club Opium in Atlanta, where Julez Smith (Solange’s son) was booked to host an LGBTQ+ night. Despite being paid to host, Julez reportedly declin
TS Madison Speak Out on Legal Situation with Naquan Palmer
Are you finding yourself frustrated by the current state of the dating pool, or are you one of the lucky ones thanking God every day that you’re out of it? On the latest episode of the Dear Black Gay Men Podcast, Jai the Gentleman dives deep into the “emotional ups and downs” of our journey to happiness, tackling everything from viral dating challenges to the latest legal headlines affecting our c
Navigating the Apps, Community, and Dating as Black Gay Men
In the latest episode of the Dear Black Gay Men Podcast, host Jai the Gentleman dives deep into the emotional ups and downs of our journey to happiness. This week’s conversation isn’t just about the “horror stories” we all face on dating apps; it’s a necessary look at how we treat one another in our pursuit of connection.Grindr and the “Ugly” FactorDoes Grindr make you feel ugly? Jai explores a vi
Redefining Masculinity for Black Gay Men
On the latest episode of the Dear Black Gay Men Podcast, host Jai the Gentleman dives deep into the complex world of mannerisms, gender roles, and the journey to happiness for Black gay men.Beyond the Binary: Embracing the “In-Between”The conversation kicks off with a viral question: Do you like the “in-between” guys? Jai explores the beauty of the “butch queen” and the “queen-queen,” highlighting
Beyond the Performance in Black Queer Culture
In the latest episode of the Dear Black Gay Men Podcast, Jai the Gentleman dives deep into the “social currency” of our culture, questioning why so many of us feel the need to perform instead of just being.From the evolution of “twink to daddy” to the unwritten rules of sexual positions, this episode is a b******t-free look at the emotional ups and downs of our journey to happiness.The Cost of the
The Rise and Fall of the “DL Whisperer”: A Lesson in Accountability
In the latest episode of the Dear Black Gay Men Podcast, host Jai the Gentleman dives deep into the viral downfall of Naquan Palmer, known online as the “DL Whisperer”. Recently detained on felony charges of aggravated stalking, Palmer’s situation has sparked a massive conversation across the Black gay internet regarding harassment, sensationalism, and the treatment of our trans sisters.From “Prot
Str8 Men Into Trans Women: Exploring Attraction, Identity, and “The Girls”
It’s another Wednesday on the Dear Black Gay Men Podcast, and Jai the Gentleman is diving deep into the conversations we usually only have in the group chat. This week, we’re reacting to a powerhouse guest: the award-winning artist and activist Dominique Morgan on the Boy Please Whatever podcast.Who is Dominique Morgan?Dominique is a Nebraska native now living in Atlanta who has transformed the la
Stop Apologizing: Curating a Life of Black Gay Joy
Are you still performing a version of yourself that doesn’t even exist anymore? In the latest episode of the Dear Black Gay Men Podcast, host Jai the Gentleman sits down with the “real-life Uncle Charlie,” Charlie Lewis Jr.. Inspired by his character in the Netflix series Forever, Charlie discusses his transformative new book, No Apologies: Love the Way You Live at Any Age.Outgrowing the “Gay Ghet
The Chasing: Atlanta Drama: Explained
Chasing Dreams and Avoiding Drama: A Deep Dive for Black Gay MenWhat happens when the “black don’t crack” lifestyle meets the messy reality of professional and personal relationships? In this week’s episode of the Dear Black Gay Men Podcast, host Jai the Gentleman breaks down the latest tea and offers grounded advice for navigating our unique journeys to happiness.Professional Power Plays: The Jus
Boundaries, Boyfriends, and the “Token” Trap: Unpacking the Karamo Brown Drama
Protecting Your Peace When Millions are on the LineWe talk a lot about protecting your peace in dating or family, but what about when your global brand is at stake? Karamo Brown recently made waves by pulling a “Mo’Nique” and sitting out press for the final season of Queer Eye.Karamo revealed he has felt mentally and emotionally abused on set for years, with his therapist advising him to stay home
Respect Yourself or Get Erased: Lessons from Girl Lala
In this episode of the Dear Black Gay Men Podcast, Jai the Gentleman is digging into a story that has completely taken over our timelines: the tragic passing and alleged identity erasure of Girl Lala.From Identity Erasure to “Robust Bottoms”Before getting into the heavy stuff, Jai highlights a new favorite creator, Denzel Kanan, who has been dropping gems about sexual dynamics from a “bottom’s per
The IamZoie Controversy: Accountability or Just Saving Face?
In the latest episode of the Dear Black Gay Men Podcast, Ja9 the Gentleman dives deep into the conversation currently taking over the timeline: the IAmZoie situation. As videos resurface allegedly showing the prominent creator in inappropriate exchanges with underage men, our community is divided on what accountability actually looks like.Power, Clout, and the “Apology Tango”With over 6 million fo
🎬 Diddy, Documentaries, and Dollars: The Black Gay Take on ‘Sean Combs: The Reckoning’
On this episode of the Dear Black Gay Men Podcast where we dive into the explosive documentary, Sean Combs: The Reckoning. Join Jai the Gentleman as he unpacks the fall of a Black culture icon and asks the tough questions about integrity, business, and big visions.🚨 The Reckoning: What the Doc AllegesThe four-part Netflix series, executive produced by Curtis “50 Cent” Jackson and directed by Alexa
Reacting to RACEPLAY & White People’s Trauma Olympics feat. Nico’s Aesthetics
Jai the Gentleman dives deep into some challenging and necessary conversations, navigating the complexities of race, sexuality, and community with his trademark blend of honesty and fire. The episode, titled “White People S**t,” centers on the realities faced by Black gay men today.The Comfort ConundrumThe show kicks off with a provocative question: Would you rather be the lone gay person in an al
Is the Dating Pool Trash, or Are We the Drama? 🤔
The latest episode of the Dear Black Gay Men Podcast tackles a question burning up the timelines: Is the dating pool really trash, or are we, the daters, the drama? Host Jai the Gentleman dives deep into this topic, reacting to the recent vlog, “32 and Dating is Trash,” by vlogger DearDondre.Jai and the chat audience explored the complexities of finding love and happiness, especially as Black gay
🎙️ Jess Hilarious Drama & Queer Culture’s Power: A Must-Hear Discussion
The drama surrounding Jess Hilarious’s controversial comments about who can have babies and her subsequent firing from the Ms. Pat Settles It show is the main event on the latest episode of the Dear Black Gay Men Podcast. Host Jai the Gentleman dives deep into the fallout, offering an unfiltered look at why Jess’s actions continue to generate massive backlash within the queer community.🛑 Why Jess
Lies, Love, and the “Trash” in Queer Culture
Jai the Gentleman, dive into some seriously taboo topics: the little lies we tell ourselves, the journey to happiness, and, of course, dating horror storie.This episode, we’re reacting to a harsh critique of gay culture that claims the Black gay community has turned “liberation into a members-only club”. The critique highlights exclusion based on masculinity, fitness, skin tone, and designer label
From Pulpit to P*rn: Mourning Michael Hurd and Debating Trans Passability
This episode of Dear Black Gay Men Podcast, host Jai the Gentleman tackles two sensitive but vital issues for the Black queer community: grieving a polarizing figure and the complicated discussion around trans identity.🕊️ Remembering Michael Hurd: Yes King, Pastor, and ManThe community lost Michael Hurd, also known as Love and Light TV or Yes King, who passed away suddenly at 47. Michael was a pro
The App Trap and the Cookout Conundrum: Real Talk on Race, Dating, and Space
On this episode of Dear Black Gay Men Podcast, host Jai the Gentleman tackles two viral topics: the toxic truth about dating apps for Black gay men and the ever-controversial question of white presence in Black spaces.📱 Dating Apps: Good for What?We often say the dating pool is trash, but Jai argues we really mean the “app dating pool is trash”. Why is it such a struggle? The app landscape is spli
Masculinity, Femininity, and Everything In Between: Unpacking Preference on Dear Black Gay Men Podcast
We’re diving deep into a topic that sparks major conversation in our community: masc for masc culture and the complexities of preference, identity, and stigma.Host Jai the Gentleman kicks off the episode by sharing his own preference for “girly boys” and feminine men, playfully stating, “nothing is too feminine for me”. He admits to being “the drama” for feeling that gay men who are “masculine all
Top-Tier Men, Dating Lies, and the Evolution of Self-Love
The latest episode of the “Dear Black Gay Men Podcast” dives headfirst into the hot-button topic of the “top-tier man” in gay culture. Host Jai the Gentleman kicks off the discussion by reacting to a SaySoTV video that identified a man as “tall, dark, and fluid” and “top-tier”. Jai questions the widely held assumption that a “top-tier man” is simply a “heterosexual man that likes other men,” sugge
Good Boys, Bad Boys, and Toxic Exes: Where Does Persistence Become Harassment?
The latest episode of the Dear Black Gay Men Podcast with Jai The Gentleman dove headfirst into the nuanced world of dominance, submission, and the sticky dynamics of dating in the black queer community.The central conversation explored the concept of the “good boy”, and how subs prefer to be handled in black queer culture. Based on a poll of 20 self-professed “good boys,” the results were split:*
Why Black Gay Men MUST Vote, and the Queer Candidate Shaking Up Alabama
We had to put the dating talk aside for a night because, frankly, the times are serious. Election Day (November 4th) is right around the corner, and the stakes couldn’t be higher. We were honored to have Dakarai Larriett, candidate for Alabama’s open U.S. Senate seat, join us in The Backroom to talk about fighting hopelessness, confronting political gridlock, and what it truly means to step up whe
"Chosen Singleness": Why Eligible Black Gay Men Are Done with Dating
Are Black Gay Men Actively Choosing to Stay Single?On a recent episode of the Dear Black Gay Men Podcast, we dove deep into a question that’s been bubbling: Why are so many eligible Black gay men opting for “chosen singleness” instead of cuffing up? The answers might surprise you, but they definitely hit home.The Big Experiment: Crib, Car, and a JobHost Jai The Gentleman interviewed 20 eligible Bl
Fragile Masculinity, DL Whisperer, & Why Straight Men Can't Clock a Queen
In this unfiltered and necessary conversation, host JAI The Gentleman dives headfirst into the hot-button issues shaking the Black queer community: the toxic allure of the “DL Whisperer” and the explosive viral video on “fragile masculinity.” This is the deep-dive talk every Black gay man and our allies need to hear about honesty, safety, and cultural responsibility in dating.In This Must-Listen E
Kid Fury's Return, Blind Dating, and the "I Love You" Barrier
From Depression to Desire: Kid Fury is Back and We’re Talking Dating, Catcalls, and Black Male BeautyAre You Stuck in a Sad Boy Shell? Kid Fury and the Dear Black Gay Men Podcast Host Say Get Outside!The latest episode of the Dear Black Gay Men podcast, hosted by Jai the Gentleman, is a must-listen for Black queer men navigating life, dating, and mental health. This week, Jai the Gentleman is reac
Decoding “Daddy”: Beyond the Bedroom in Black Gay Culture
Join JAI The Gentleman of the Dear Black Gay Men Podcast as he breaks down an exclusive, off-air conversation from the “Private Party” episode and dives into the ambiguity of this cultural term.In this episode, we tackle the big questions:* Does “daddy” have a meaning outside of sex in Black gay culture?* Does the term lose its meaning when we use it too often?* Is it simply a top with a big dick,
I Obsessed Over Getting Men To Commit in Relationships (here’s what I learned)
I interviewed 20 eligible single men to find out the real reasons they don’t commit. This episode of the Dear Black Gay Men Podcast unpacks the surprisingly consistent dating horror stories and boils them down to three basic things every man needs to commit to a relationship.In this video, you’ll learn:* 🔑 The number one reason men don’t commit: they don’t know what they want, or can’t concretely
I Obsessed Over Being a Better Top (here's what I learned)
I talked 20 bottoms to bust myths tops have about good sex. Twenty conversations narrowed down to just 4 things that bottoms say tops can do to have immediately better sexWhether you’re dating someone new, in a long term relationship already, or just hooking up while you’re single, sex is an inevitable part of your life. We all want it and we all want ours to be the best.My whole job on this chan
Black Men Don't Lynch Ourselves
A Black man was lynched in America in 2025.Let me state, unequivocally, that this episode or us reacting to this story is not intended to position any person in this story as a member of the LGBTQIA+ community.But Demontre Reed was a Black man and to that end, he could have been me, or any of our listeners, or our brother, or our cousin, or our son. Regardless of his sexuality or ours, we, as Blac
How To Set HEALTHY Dating Boundaries
Boundaries are simply what I say hell yea to.A good man will function well within your tolerable region without issue. And when he bumps up against your boundary, he’ll identify it, acknowledge, make good on the violation, and move on with a clearer understanding.But all of that is built on being clear about boundaries and that clarity, for most of us, comes long before we start dating anyone in p
Why Is Dating Black Men So Hard?
My last relationship ended three times.The first time was because I was insecure. The second time was because he was impatient. The third time was because I never invested myself back into the relationship after the first two attempts.It takes a lot to see the dating process through to it’s hopeful end. Self-awareness is probably at the top of the list.So tonight, I’m asking the DBGM family to pul
Red Flags You Should Never Ignore
I believe that when we’re dating in our 30s, because we have something to lose, we try to safeguard our hearts and our lives from men that don’t mean for our good.That’s why red flags have become so important. We’ve seen our parent’s red flags when we were little. We’ve overlooked obvious red flags in our 20s. We’ve talked to our friends about their boyfriends red flags in our 30s.Everything in us
Why Gay Men Stay Single
Earlier this year, I dated someone for 6 months.I told my best friend about him after 3 months. He’d met my siblings after 5. On the face, it looked like things were progressing.The quiet truth is that he had dumped twice and I was too insecure to leave it alone when everyone around me told him he wasn’t the one.What I know about myself and so many others is that we, Black gay men, want to be in l
What Makes a MAN Versatile?
While I haven’t bottomed in a long time, most of my exes have been versatile.The irony, though, is that most of the problems and successes we faced in relationships stemmed from everything aside from what happens in the bedroom.Being verse, just like being top or bottom, can be limited to just dicks and asses, but I’ve found that for most of us, sexual position has some spill over into emotions, h
Are The Real Tops Gone?
I am what the gworls would call a “soft top”.I like to do all the traditionally masculine things, but I also am fully a butch queen. I haven’t been fucked in years and don’t have a whole lot of interest in being fucked, but I would for the right person as long as they know how to handle my delicate flower.Fun Fact: someone once called it a slut with my dick but a prude with my hole.1. The Top Drou
Why Do We Sexualize EVERYTHING?
I like being naked. I like being naked with other men. And I like being naked when sex has nothing to do with it…but it can.I call that being a nudist, but sometimes terms like kink, or nudist, or voyeur don’t resonate with Black men. But can they? Or should they?So tonight, I’m joined by the promoter behind the biggest wave of nudist club nights for cis men by a Black promoter. I’ve attended his
Where Do Trans Men Fit in Gay Pride?
When I walk into any pride celebration, there are a couple things that connect me and most of the men present. Number 1: we’re all men and Number 2: we’re attracted to men. But what happens when only one of those apply to all of us and how do we create pride celebrations that affirm all of our experiences.So tonight I’m joined by A’Jay Love. He’s a trans masc creator who gained prominence when he
I Interviewed 50 Couples. Here's What No One Tells Us About Dating
These couples uncover the secrets to successfully navigating the dating pool as I abruptly find myself back in it.* 00:00:00 - Introduction: Three Rules for Finding a Man* 00:01:11 - Applying the Lessons & Welcome* 00:02:02 - Personal Update: Dealing with a Breakup* 00:04:50 - The Danger of Denying Emotions After a Breakup* 00:09:25 - Finding a Good Man: Setting Intention* 00:11:02 - Different Lov
How Black Gay Men Find Chosen Family While Living With HIV
This week, Jai The Gentleman connects with Daniel DriffinChapters0:00:00 - Introduction to the guest, Dr. Daniel Driffin0:01:51 - Discussion on the CRIBB program0:11:09 - NAESM as family, friends, and a brave space0:12:01 - The need for affirmation within the Black queer culture0:22:52 - The significance of the changing language and the future of black queer culture0:26:06 - Personal significance
Why Good Men Love Open Relationships (while 70% of everyone else calls it cheating)
My inadequacies around relationship stemmed from times when my feelings were disregarded. I learned, having been on the receiving end of emotional trauma, that there are three basic agreements at work in any relationship. Nailing these will help quell the inadequacies and insecurities so many of us experience in our partners, and make way for clear agreements that both (or all) involved can be com
I Came Out...to My P*nis
This week Jai The Gentleman discusses:How "coming out" goes way further than just telling people you're gay. It's an everyday process that starts with yourself.NEW CONTENT, every day on YT : youtube.com/@dearblackgaymenSubscribe to second channel: youtube.com/@jaithegentlemanShop Brand New Merch: https://dearblackgaymen.shopListen on Spotify: https://spoti.fi/3CvMjThListen on Apple Podcasts: http
I Found My Boyfriend...Then My Life Fell Apart
This week Jai The Gentleman discusses the last relationship he was in and how Black queer culture tried to destroy it. And how you can safeguard your relationship from the triggers that come from the gworls.00:00 Introduction to Black Gay Culture and Relationships 01:04 Welcome to Dear Black Gay Men Podcast 01:47 Personal Dating Experiences and Vulnerability 03:11 Church Announcements and Upcomin
3 Signs Your Black Gay Romance is the Real Deal
Read “I made 6 guys cum at the park” https://bit.ly/4jFmRx3Chapters00:00 The Importance of Sex in Relationships 00:57 Introduction to the Podcast 01:56 Church Announcements 04:21 Signs of a Healthy Relationship 08:35 The Complexity of Relationships 13:24 Conclusion and Final Thoughts➡️ Shop DBGM Merch: https://www.dearblackgaymen.shop ➡️ Become an Insider: https://youtube.com/@dearblackgaymen/join
I was nude in the club...
A trip to Atlanta's nude club night, "Reveal," taught me that I'm probably better off single in this season of life.Read "I Made 6 Guys Cum At The Park" https://bit.ly/4jFmRx3--Chapters00:00 Introduction to Single Life Levels 00:09 Coincidentally Single 00:39 Intentionally Single 00:56 Temporarily Single 01:28 Podcast Introduction 02:09 Church Announcements 05:12 Breakup Reflections 07:53 Lessons
The Break-up Is Over...Now What?
00:00 Introduction: Post-Breakup Reflections01:31 New Features: Substack and Live Shows04:10 Church Announcements: Updates and Membership04:42 Personal Story: Lessons from a Breakup07:51 Dating Insights: Commitment and Communication17:44 Final Thoughts: The Importance of Perseverance23:53 Closing Remarks: Stay Connected This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers
How I Went From "In Love" To "Men Are Dogs" and Back Because Of A Fire Sign
Playing With FireMy eyes opened and my heart sank. I was expecting a “Good Morning Jarrett”. The same text I’d received everyday for the past 3 months. But today there was no good morning greeting, no salutation from the guy I loved. Nothing. Yesterday I was in love and today I’m alone.Saturday he dumped me. I thought we were getting closer and finding our way. Little did I know that the ne
The Dating Secret They Don't Tell You: 3 Phases
I spent 3 months on dating apps with 0 matches…For a while I thought I wasn’t what Black guys desired, but really, it was a deeper key that I was missing: intention…both mine and theirs.Dating is a combination of time and effort. Some of us have a lot of time to date, but don’t focus our effort in a way that moves us down our journey to happiness. Others have effort, but no time. Some have neit
You're Speaking Love Languages Wrong: The Truth About Quality Time
Let’s watch some Netflix…I thought this was enough for quality time: you’re here; I’m here. We’re spending time so it has to be quality. Then I met Brandon.He checked all the boxes of the non-negotiables that Lamont talked about on his appearance on Dear Black Gay Men Podcast. But every time we spent time together, I felt more alone with Brandon than I did without him.Quality is relativeOur lov
How to MANifest your ideal relationship
It could all be so simple, but…We’d rather make the dating process so hard. It boils down to ego keeping us from what we actually want.Desire says, “I want a man.” But ego says “I’m independent.”Desire says, “I’m ready to date”. But ego says “Say less.”Ego is that thing lingering in the back of our mind that protects who we are from the outside and we think it keeps us safe. Ego is that piece of o
Nervous About Asking Someone Out? You're Not Alone!
Dating has gotten way too complicated, but…It’s not the dating. It’s me. Underneath all the fluff, and heartache, and trauma all of us have endured, we all want the same thing: to be desired, to be wanted, and to be loved. Dating is the pathway each of us has to walk to fulfill that desire—the process of figuring out who we are and sharing it with someone special.New uploads EVERY DAYSupport the C
Why dating rejection HURTS SO BAD
I feel like dating has gotten so complicatedNot that I’m old or anything, but there was a time when you saw someone at the club or out in gay spaces, walked over to him, asked his number. Probably jotted it on a napkin, and you pursued happiness. Now, as this experience would have it, men get to see you, build a narrative around who you are and how you carry yourself, then react to, ghost, or de
Shut up and Listen
Thank GOD I didn't f*ck this man...➡️ Become an Insider: https://youtube.com/@dearblackgaymen/join➡️ Join the newsletter: http://dearblackgaymen.substack.com📲 Subscribe to Dear Black Gay Men PodcastApple: https://tinyurl.com/5ymdtdx4Spotify: https://tinyurl.com/2p9pye7sYT: YouTube.com/@DearBlackGayMen🎶 Theme music by The Passion HIFIOur purpose is to be the voice of our culture: talking to Black g
I've had it with CONDOMS
While I was cruising on the apps one day, this guy's profile really rubbed me the wrong way. I realized that I don't like condoms, but not for the reason you'd think. This episode is dedicated to overcoming condoms so we can get free. Condoms: Explained on Dear Black Gay Men LIVEFollow @JaiTheGentleman on IG, @DearBlackGayMen on IG.Subscribe to Dear Black Gay Men on YouTube This is a public epi
I'm addicted to dating
It's been a while since I've uploaded to this platform and explanations are in order. I did take a little while to sort through some personal things. Nothing major, but this episode is dedicated to one of the big lessons that I uncovered during my time away from the mic.Follow @JaiTheGentleman on IG, @dearblackgaymen on IG.Tune in to the live show every Thursday at 8pm Eastern on YouTube This is
You ready for cuffing season?
Noah's Arc was mym 2005 dating goals before dating goals were even a thing. I remember going to Best Buy to buy the box set so I could dream about outing a piece of trade and living happily ever after.Now, nearly 20 years later, I can watch Noah's Arc with a different set of dating eyes. I can see where they went wrong, what dating lessons should I have left on TV, and which ones can I learn from
Gaslighting 101: you've done it before
This one is pretty vulnerable for me, but I'll admit it boldly: I'm a gaslighter. My last relationship had to end because I did some dirty stuff while we were together. Ralph Pittman is the human gaslight and I only know that because the way he messed up Drew is exactly how I acted in my last serious dating situation.But so many of our listeners/viewers are still up-in-the-air about what gasligh
NO SL*T SHAMING ALLOWED
Sl*t shaming aside, Ali Adamos is good at doing many things. He can get countless men to give him exactly what he wants---usually exactly HOW he wants it. Isn't that our dating dream? Getting a guy to date us, be with us, love us HOW we want to be loved?After I 💦 and I could think clearly, I looked at Ali, what he says, how he moves through life to attract so many men and there was one BIG less
Transphobic Gay Men
@OpenRelationshipPodcast is one of our faves here on the channel. The hosts give different perspectives on gay dating, Black LGBTQ social issues and everything A to Z about Black gay culture. But this particular story rubbed me the wrong way and I think Rodney may have it wrong.I am not trans, nor am I a parent, so most may take my perspectives with a grain of salt, but Neyo story has us quest
Want some juice?
I know it’s Leo season, but this lesson in Gemini dating hit me so hard this week. I went on a date, asked the guy “what are you looking for?’ Of course, in true gay fashion, he responded “I’m not really looking.” For some reason, we’ll go looking for EVERYTHING in the world except a date. We’ll look for money, cars, degrees, jobs, customers, but love is something we expect to fall in our lap.This
Not mobile, can't host
@BishopOCAllen renewed his vows to his husband of 20 years, Rashad Burgess. Allen, who I call “B”, said he hates folding clothes. To the untrained ear, that sounds like something you discover over a 20 year marriage. But to me, I thought how dope it is that he’s self-aware enough to know that about himself and to say it publicly.This episode is dedicated to helping each of us single people grow
WORK WORK WORK (in my Rihanna voice)
Have you ever met a guy, got a number, texted for a while, a couple dates, but just can't make it over the 90-day hump? After so many failed dating attempts, it's easy to think it's either all men...or it's got to be me.This episode of the podcast is here to show us that it's a little of column A, a little of column B. A whole lot of luck and the right kind of work. What kind of work should we
Cheater, cheater, pumpkin eater
I don't want to say EVERYONE has cheated, but have a relationship or dating commitment violated is an experience way too many gay guys have in common. I'm a cheater. I had a wonderful relationship that fell apart because of a lot of issues I brought into the dating situation.Now that I've worked through my ish (I am a single guru after all - https://youtu.be/sY4ubstbX-c) and I've dealt with my i
I'm single as a dollar bill
New uploads WEDNESDAYS & THURSDAYSSupport the Channel: https://bit.ly/43lQ2N9Listen to the podcast: https://tinyurl.com/5ymdtdx4I really don’t think Black gay men are singling right. When it comes to dating, there is some intention we have to put behind who we allow into our lives. This post is a must see for any Black gay guy who is looking to get back into the dating pool. What should you be
Are you top or bottom?
When's the last time somebody asked you if you're a top or bottom? For me it was a couple days ago just before a first date. He was more interested in my position than he was in the date. Then I got the lesson.➡️ Become an Insider: http://www.dearblackgaymen/subscribe📲 Subscribe to Dear Black Gay Men PodcastApple: https://tinyurl.com/5ymdtdx4Spotify: https://tinyurl.com/2p9pye7sYT: YouTube.com/
Can we talk about kinks?
Gee Smalls is the Jai-appointed king of nudism in Atlanta. I'm worried about what to wear on an upcoming cabin trip, meanwhile he's naked on the gram. Then I got the lesson.➡️ Join Dear Black Gay Men Insiders for exclusive contentFB Group: https://bit.ly/3wsiWx4📲 Subscribe to Dear Black Gay Men PodcastApple: https://tinyurl.com/5ymdtdx4Spotify: https://tinyurl.com/2p9pye7sYT: YouTube.com/@DearBlac
He bottomed me like a top
I was traveling for an entanglement--not a date, not a relationship--a purely physical exchange when I got a big lesson about hook-up culture and how it's an analogy for Black gay culture at large.➡️ Join Dear Black Gay Men Insiders for exclusive contentFB Group: https://bit.ly/3wsiWx4📲 Subscribe to Dear Black Gay Men PodcastApple: https://tinyurl.com/5ymdtdx4Spotify: https://tinyurl.com/2p9pye7sY
I've become a daddy
I remember when I used to watch older guys in the club thinking, "where yo man at?" I swore that I'd have me a husband before I end up 40 in the club...➡️ Join Dear Black Gay Men Insiders for exclusive contentFB Group: https://bit.ly/3wsiWx4📲 Subscribe to Dear Black Gay Men PodcastApple: https://tinyurl.com/5ymdtdx4Spotify: https://tinyurl.com/2p9pye7sYT: YouTube.com/@DearBlackGayMen🎶 Theme music
Compromise for what?
We go live Thursdays at 8pm EST!Join the group: https://bit.ly/3wsiWx4Listen to the podcast: https://tinyurl.com/5ymdtdx4Knowing what we want in a relationship sounds good on its face, but some of us have taken "knowing" to an unhealthy extent. This week's episode of Dear Black Gay Men Podcast is focused on a date I went on with "Victor" and some of the pitfalls that come with being a single man
"I don't know how you feel 'til you tell me"
Talking to a new guy is the part of dating that is the most exciting because you get to figure out the guy and dream about your future together. But with that can come some tense discussions. This week's episode is dedicated to understanding where those arguments come from when you're dating, how to get out of them, and the self-work Black gay guys have to do to avoid them altogether. #dating #
Just ask him out!
Asking someone on a date seems pretty simple, but so many Black gay guys fail (or suck) at it, even in 2023. In this episode, @jaithegentleman gives his short, 3 step process to asking anyone on date and getting them to say yes. If you want to get the date with the guy you've been eyeing across the bar, gym, supermarket, or app, this episode was made specifically for you. #dating #relationship
He got on and left yo *ss for a white gworl
We go live Thursdays at 9pm EST!Join the group: https://bit.ly/3wsiWx4Listen to the podcast: https://tinyurl.com/5ymdtdx4The best part about talking to so many gay guys about dating is that I can start to see the patterns. Every time the conversation of prominent interracial couples comes up, I see a patter. I could be biased, but there is an equation that makes interracial dating work for some
Ain't you tired?
This episode was therapy for me. It took actual therapy, a failed Jack'd encounter, and some introspection for me to see one of my deepest issues in dating. Enjoy.New uploads THURSDAYSJoin the group: https://bit.ly/3wsiWx4Listen to the podcast: https://tinyurl.com/5ymdtdx4➡️ Join Dear Black Gay Men Insiders for exclusive contentFB Group: https://bit.ly/3wsiWx4📲 Subscribe to Dear Black Gay Men Po
Church shouts and c*m dumps
Saturday night at a sex party-->Sunday morning at church-->Monday afternoon epiphany moments.New uploads THURSDAYSJoin the group: https://bit.ly/3wsiWx4Listen to the podcast: https://tinyurl.com/5ymdtdx4➡️ Join Dear Black Gay Men Insiders for exclusive contentFB Group: https://bit.ly/3wsiWx4📲 Subscribe to Dear Black Gay Men PodcastApple: https://tinyurl.com/5ymdtdx4Spotify: https://tinyurl.c
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