Chris vs. The People
Chris vs. The People is a weekly podcast where comedian Chris Klemens acts as a call-in operator, offering brutally honest advice and engaging in deep conversations with listeners. Topics range from couples counseling to airing dirty laundry, with the twist that you never know if Chris is on your side or against you. Video episodes are also available on YouTube.
Episodes
59: Chris vs. Zachariah Porter
Chris is joined by comedian Zachariah Porter and the stories are fully unhinged. From a fake Disney Channel casting call at age 11 to taking guitar lessons inside an active chicken coop, they trace the full gay awakening timeline (we’re talking NSYNC magazines, Nick Jonas medical dog tags, and a Shania Twain wall calendar). The two then take a hard left into vaping yourself into an ER scare, a mu
58: The Facebook Feud That Ruined My Family
Chris dives into a “sexy stories” special where callers dish jaw-dropping confessions you truly can’t predict. First up: a photo lab employee uncovers her boss’s wildly inappropriate Amazon habits at work….plus a shocking browser history reveal. Then, a family’s years-long feud explodes when the callers ex-uncle drops a no-holds-barred “evidence” album that turns everyone’s loyalties upside down.
57: Chris vs. Dillon Francis
Chris welcomes Dillon Francis for a chaotic, hilarious episode that somehow covers DJ life, sobriety, music-making, dating on the road, and one truly unhinged Grammys story. The two get into career highs, social media lows, making heartfelt songs and absolute nonsense bangers, plus the weird reality of life in entertainment. It's funny, surprisingly honest, and full of the kind of side stories th
56: My Uncle Married My Dad’s Stalker
Chris is fully in his messy bag this week, diving into the absolute wildest family lore that callers have ever shared. From an uncle who marries his own brother’s stalker, to a jaw-dropping dad/grandma situation, to an aunt who turns a life insurance payout into a fresh BBL and OnlyFans career, the chaos does not let up. Things somehow get even more unhinged when a funeral turns into a full-on fa
55: Chris vs. Kelly Cutrone
This week on Chris vs. The People, PR/media maven and reality TV icon Kelly Cutrone sits down with Chris for a conversation that goes absolutely everywhere. From the ruthless business logic behind joining The Hills to ghost encounters in the Hudson Valley, cannabis focus groups, and a fiery defense of Tyra Banks, Kelly holds nothing back, including a direct shot at America’s Next Top Model host J
54: I Got Scammed Out of $3,000 on a Cruise
Sun’s out, chaos out. Chris kicks off a summer themed episode with a caller whose spring break spirals into a cruise disaster, a fake-dog scam, and an infamous purple mermaid bikini. Next, a family trip to Thailand turns into multiple near-death moments involving parasailing gone wrong and a brutal sunburn saga. Finally, the last caller recounts a wild night out that escalates from rooftop pregam
53: We Brought Hermit Crabs to the Strip Club
In this week’s episode of Chris vs. The People, Chris dives into “crazy night out” territory with three wild tales you have to hear to believe. First, a freshman year flirtation goes up in literal flames when a bar candle meets long hair. Then, a friends turned foursome saga unfolds: mountains, gay erotica, and a trip that turns euphoric… and complicated. Finally, we meet the legend who smuggled
52: I Accidentally Hit My Mom With a Car
This Mother's Day episode of Chris vs. The People is anything but your typical sentimental tribute, so buckle up. Callers share stories ranging from a Christmas discovery that blew up an entire family group chat, to a mom who kept a life-changing secret for 14 years, to a swinging lifestyle reveal that came with an unexpected paper drop on the couch. Things take a chaotic turn when one caller con
51: My First Date Ended in the ER
This week on Chris vs. The People, the first dates get truly unhinged (and that might be an understatement). One caller had a medical emergency mid-hookup that turned out to be an extremely rare type of stroke, and somehow that's not even the wildest part of her story. Then a smoke shop overnight worker shares how a socially awkward regular asked her out at 2 a.m….and followed it up by inviting h
50: Chris vs. Joe Santagato
For the 50th episode, Chris finally brings on a first guest…and it's none other than Joe Santagato of The Basement Yard. The two dive deep into childhood chaos, terrible first jobs, and the kind of stories you'd only share with someone you actually trust. From accidentally inventing a board game to a limo night gone completely sideways, this episode is packed with moments that are equal parts hil
49: I Stole My Classmate's Pee to Pass a Drug Test
This week's episode is a special 4/20 edition of Chris vs. the People, and the callers absolutely delivered. The first caller takes us back to 2012 when a casual smoke sesh with her sister turned into a front row seat to the dark side of synthetic weed. Then our next caller shares the wildly eventful story of a Feeld app meetup that took an unexpected detour in the middle of a threesome, and some
48: I Slept With Both of My Bosses
This week on Chris vs. the People, the workplace has never looked wilder…and we mean that in every sense of the word. From a summer camp counselor who took her long weekend a little too seriously at the Jersey Shore, to a fast food employee who discovered her manager had a lot more going on than just running a register, these stories will have you equal parts gasping and cackling. Then we close o
47: My Mom Pooped in a Cup (and Made Me Watch)
This week on Chris vs. the People, the callers did NOT come to play. From a mother who made a very questionable decision during a blizzard to a family brawl that ended up in front of a judge, these dysfunctional family stories deliver exactly the chaos Chris lives for. A first communion party takes a humbling turn, and one caller shares a childhood outing that had all the makings of a Lifetime mo
46: He Cheated on Me with 28 Women
Dating horror stories are on the menu this week, and Chris's callers did NOT disappoint. From a threesome gone catastrophically wrong in Idaho to a college situationship that spiraled into a four-way makeout session, an STD, and a well-deserved slap, the stories keep getting wilder. One caller confesses to a revenge plot so unhinged she carried the guilt for years (and yes, she and her best frien
45: My Brother Snorted Our Grandma's Ashes
This week on Chris vs. the People, we're diving into spooky, paranormal, and death-adjacent stories…and they did not disappoint. One caller shares what happened at her grandmother's birthday celebration that nobody in her family will ever forget, and another reveals a summer hookup story with a coworker that takes a genuinely dark and disturbing turn. Then a wedding photographer recounts the nigh
44: The Amish Shut Down My High School Party
It may be March but we are going back to school in today’s episode of Chris vs. the People. This week's school stories might be the wildest batch yet. We've got barn parties, the Amish shutting down a high school rager, a Jon & Kate Plus 8 cameo in a viral TikTok, and a girl who accidentally got her ceramics teacher fired by catfishing him. Someone also broke their lady bits trying to impress
43: I Hooked Up in My Teacher's Car During Class
This week on Chris vs. the People, we're throwing it back to school days that prove everyone was absolutely unwell. First, a caller shares how she was held at harpoon point by a classmate whose bedroom walls were covered in red handprints. Then, we hear from someone who hooked up with a guy in their science teacher's car….while the guy was allegedly also hooking up with said teacher. Finally, we
42: My Brother Set the Cross on Fire During Church...
This week on Chris vs. the People, we’re diving into church and religious stories that prove Sunday service is never as quiet as it looks. First, a caller shares how her 10‑year‑old brother, acting as an altar server, nearly set the church on fire thanks to a giant paper‑mâché Easter decoration. Then, another caller walks us through her Pentecostal upbringing, her childhood crushes on two church
41: I Caught My Ex Cheating...on Reddit
This week on Chris vs. the People, we’re diving headfirst into the world of cheating because apparently, no one knows how to act right. First, a caller is currently tangled up in an office situationship with a married coworker who’s got a wife, kids, and a very questionable cage situation. Then, we meet someone whose cousin slept with their uncle’s girlfriend…and got a little surprise for his tro
40: My Bumble Date Tried Kidnapping Me
It’s the Valentine’s episode of Chris vs. the People, which obviously means love, disaster, and several reasons to stay single. One caller gets stuck on a “double date” from hell that turns into a three‑month saga with a guy who shows wild videos and yells at paintings. Another barely escapes a Bumble date who tries to take her to a remote “family cabin” straight out of Dateline. Then, someone lo
39: My Date Did Drugs with Prince
This week on Chris vs. the People, Chris kicks things off with a dose of cold medicine and chaos as callers bring some truly wild stories. First up, a listener exposes her dad’s jaw-dropping affair with his much younger employee…and the family drama that followed. Then, we head to remote Alaska for a threesome gone wrong involving coworkers, a tech bro, and a van-lifer with emotional baggage. Fin
38: I Catfished My Middle School Bully
This week on Chris vs. the People, Chris opens the phone lines for secrets and tea… and immediately regrets asking. One caller shares how her ex–best friend accused her of being an unfit mother and threatened CPS only for that same friend’s toddler to later wander outside alone in the snow. Another listener admits to catfishing her middle school bullies just to figure out why they hated her (hone
37: I Dug Up My Grandfather’s Grave
This week on Chris vs. the People, things get weird in every possible direction. A caller admits to sexting her married boss for months while also hooking up with a coworker at the same job, another shares the surprisingly normal-in-her-culture story of digging up her grandfather’s bones as part of a traditional second burial, and one listener realizes her college boyfriend, who loved “being a bo
36: My Date Was Wearing a Diaper
This week on Chris vs. the People, things escalate fast. A caller cuts off her longtime best friend after she kicks her fiancé’s gunshot wound and then demands her cat back out of spite. Another shares how her brother’s wife secretly cheated on him for nearly a decade with her best friend, only to leave him, remarry, and still use his last name. And finally, one listener explains how being too ni
35: My Ex Slept With His Sister
This week on Chris vs. the People, the new year starts off completely unhinged. A caller explains how her 18th birthday party ended in a literal shootout after a hotel party moved to a boxing gym, another shares how her 15th birthday was ruined by the January 6th insurrection (complete with her uncle showing up on live TV mid–Happy Birthday), and one listener drops a jaw-on-the-floor confession a
34: My First Date Turned Into a Crime Scene
This week on Chris vs. the People, Chris hears some of the most unhinged relationship stories yet. A caller shares a first date gone terrifyingly wrong when her date offers to show her crime scene photos of his murdered sister. Another explains why she cut off her online best friend after a shocking confession involving her brother and a racist spiral, and one listener reveals how a cousin’s sudde
33: I Went Off on a MAGA Man
This week on Chris vs. the People, Chris opens the phone lines and asks listeners one question: what’s the worst thing you’ve ever called someone? The answers range from hilariously creative to deeply unhinged. Callers share everything from a brutal roadrage insult that ended with instant karma, to a devastatingly specific roast comparing someone to the original live-action Sonic the Hedgehog. Thi
32: My Ex Catfished Me Using My Phone Plan
This week on Chris vs. the People, Chris dives into a web of lies, chaos, and catfishing so elaborate it could be its own Netflix documentary. Every story this week centers on deception…and somehow, each one manages to outdo the last. First, a caller shares how her ex not only cheated, got married, and had a baby immediately after their breakup, but then catfished her for months for reasons of his
31: The FBI Came to My House in 4th Grade
This week, Chris hears from a listener whose mysterious uncle lived a double life full of sugar babies and family chaos, another who had the FBI show up at her house at age twelve thanks to a wildly misbehaving Roblox boyfriend, and a final caller who woke up to flashing lights and officers surrounding her home in what felt like a movie scene. Law enforcement, family drama, childhood panic…it’s al
30: Listeners Reveal Their Insane Secrets
For Episode 30, Chris decides to ditch the usual format and crack open the Chris vs. the People phone lines for something he’s always wanted to do: let strangers confess their deepest, juiciest secrets…completely unfiltered. First up, a listener admits she was secretly married AND divorced for over two years, all without her family having a clue. Then a wedding-industry worker reveals her pettiest
29: I Was Involved With Ted Bundy
Fresh off a flight and running on fumes, Chris still refuses to miss a week, and thank god, because this episode is juicier than a fresh BBL. First, a caller takes us to Portugal for what was supposed to be a dreamy couples’ kayaking trip… until €1 shots, a rocky ocean, and a seasick boyfriend turn the excursion into a full-blown puke parade. Then, we head to the Maryland/West Virginia border for
28: My Mom Accidentally Roofied Me
In this chaotic rollercoaster of an episode, Chris dives headfirst into stories that are equal parts horrifying, hilarious, and completely unhinged. We kick things off with a caller whose peeping tom encounter turns into a full-blown true-crime story, complete with cigarette smoke, useless boyfriends, and trauma realizations mid-conversation. Then, things somehow get wilder when another listener r
27: College Threesome Gone Wrong
This week’s episode of Chris vs. the People is one for the books. From a first date that went horribly (and hilariously) wrong to a college night that spiraled into pure chaos, this week’s calls are some of the wildest yet. Chris talks to listeners about bad timing, worse decisions, and those moments that start out innocent and end with the phrase “how did we get here?” One caller relives a date t
26: My Family Committed Insurance Fraud
This week’s episode is all over the place in the best way. We’ve got secret families, haunted hallways, and enough plot twists to make Maury take notes. A caller’s “family feud” takes a wild turn when two unexpected guests show up at dinner… and turn out to be her uncle’s secret brothers from his dad’s other family in Samoa…where he had nineteen kids and one on the way. Another caller’s aunt moves
25: My Aunt Married Her Stepfather
It’s almost Halloween, and somehow every caller this week decided to bring a different kind of horror story. First, a listener accidentally manifests her coworker into a car crash (Florida never disappoints). Then another caller reveals her aunt is her own stepmom, in a family drama so twisted it makes “Keeping Up with the Kardashians” look like a documentary. But it doesn’t stop there. We also he
24: My Hookup Turned Into a Taylor Swift TED Talk
This week on Chris vs. the People, Chris may or may not have come straight from happy hour…and it shows. Things start with a caller whose post-hookup pillow talk turned into a full Taylor Swift history lecture before taking a shocking, very NSFW twist. From there, we meet someone whose mom completely ruined Disney World in a pair of white jeans (and a Buzz Lightyear ride), another caller who’s spi
23: My Date Accidentally Shot a Gun in My House
In this week’s episode of Chris vs. the People, we’re swinging between heartfelt and hilarious. Chris kicks things off talking about how everyone’s gotten worse at driving and why the Amish would absolutely lose their minds over a Cybertruck. Then, a caller opens up about the sting of being called fat by a friend, and Chris dives into an honest, funny, and validating conversation about body image,
22: My Homophobic Ex Became a Gay Porn Star
This week on Chris vs. the People, we’re diving into stories that prove reality is stranger than fiction. First, a caller shares how her husband’s “we’re just friends” excuse unraveled into cheating, puzzles, and one of the messiest divorces you’ll ever hear. Then, another caller reveals the wild twist of discovering that her once-homophobic ex is now a gay p0rn star…and yes, the irony is deliciou
21: I Accidentally Became a Getaway Driver
On this episode of Chris vs. the People, the chaos comes in waves. First, we hear from someone who accidentally became a getaway driver for a breaking and entering. Then, a caller shares how a long-time friendship fell apart over a bathroom dispute. Next up is an Am I the Asshole? scenario after a boyfriend discovers things in his partner’s notes app. And finally, one caller swears their friend is
20: I Dated a Mormon Priest with a Weird Kink
This episode of Chris vs. the People is pure chaos from start to finish. First, a caller suspects her dad might be cheating on her stepdad after catching him liking some eyebrow-raising Instagram reels. Then, we hear the unhinged saga of someone who dated a self-proclaimed Mormon priest who could code (and somehow got weirder from there). Next, a jaw-dropping scheme where someone impersonates thei
19: My First Date Ended With 7 State Troopers
This week on Chris vs. the People, chaos and comedy collide. First up, a caller takes us inside the disaster of a Facebook Dating match that spiraled into a front yard standoff, a drunk mom, and seven state trooper cars. Then, we hear from a sibling fed up with their brother’s freeloading girlfriend, sparking an “am I the asshole?” debate. Next, we learn why two Florida teenagers ended up being “h
18: My Boss Wore a Vibrator to Work
This week on Chris vs. the People, things spiral from messy to downright unhinged. We start with a caller whose dad casually asked her to sell her car. Naturally, we rope in her sister for the big reveal as to why, and chaos ensues. From there, we lighten up with a hilariously cringe kindergarten story about mistaking a new classmate’s name for her favorite snack. Things spiral further when a grou
17: A Murderer Spent the Night at My House
This week’s episode of Chris vs. the People is packed with stories you won’t believe actually happened. First, we hear from a caller who had to resuscitate their ex’s best friend not once, but twice…only to later discover something disturbing about their ex. Then, someone reveals what happened when an eight-month fling with their best friend’s mom spiraled into chaos involving their own brother. A
16: My Ex Had a Secret Porn Empire
Hot bosses, hidden secrets, and...chlamydia-induced paralysis? Buckle up. Chris hears from four callers with stories that get messier by the minute. A young woman confesses she’s in love with her older, married boss (who also happens to be her ex-wedding-party drinking buddy). Another caller finds out she was being cheated on while in the ER—because she couldn’t move half her body…from an untreate
15: A Netflix Star Crashed My Dinner
This week, chaos calls in. First up, a weed farm worker spills everything about a creepy coworker, a judgmental vegan, and literally going into labor on the job. Then, Chris plays therapist for a listener who's objected to not one, but TWO engagements in a single month, including her own little brother's. We also help a bride decide whether to invite her villain-level sister-in-law to the wedding
14: I Had Sugar Daddies at Mormon College
Chris is couch-bound with a freshly wrapped ankle, a glass of wine, and a lineup of absolute madness. First up, Anastasia finds out she’s not invited to her childhood friend’s wedding after 15+ years of friendship—and it only gets messier from there. Then, Kayla calls in with a Florida vacation tale involving laxatives, IBS, and an unfortunate ocean incident… right next to a family scattering thei
13: Catfished by a 40 Year Old Man in Florida
In this episode of Chris vs. the People, Chris recounts the DIY disaster that left him with a third-degree burn and a newfound fear of boiling water. Then, buckle up as the calls roll in with stories that are as chaotic as they are jaw-dropping: a 19-year-old flies to meet a 40-year-old Twitter scammer faking cancer, a daughter uncovers her dad’s 14-year affair with her mom’s former friend (yes, t
12: I Found a Body in the Water at Work
In this grab-bag of chaos, Chris kicks things off with a caller who got a table shoved into her crotch over Alfredo sauce. Then, a woman finds out her dead dog was never cremated — surprise! They’ve been cuddling a box of mystery ashes. Up next: a spa employee who had a customer die mid-bubble bath, and yes, she had to clean up everything that came out. And finally, we meet a nanny being terrorize
11: I Hooked Up with My High School Teacher
In this episode of Chris vs. The People, Chris taps into his nosiest instincts as listeners call in to air out their wildest dirty laundry. A woman shares how her mom iced a woman (literally) with a full cup of coffee on Christmas Eve. Another caller opens up about cutting her deadbeat dad off after years of Facebook drama and emotional chaos. And just when you think men couldn’t get any worse, on
10: She Slept with Her Dad...On Purpose
This might be the most unhinged episode of Chris vs. the People yet—and that’s saying something. Chris takes a call from Marvin, who’s gone no-contact with her narcissist mom after discovering her stepdad put her $40,000 in debt. Then, a caller shares a story so jaw-dropping it’ll leave your soul begging for bleach: a girl willingly slept with her biological father. Yeah. It somehow gets worse. Th
9: My Situationship Proposed From His Girlfriend’s Couch
This week on Chris vs. The People, things get juicy. Chris talks with a couple navigating ten years of love — and nonstop sabotage from a fat-shaming, manipulative mother-in-law. Then, a debate over peeing in the shower nearly tears a relationship apart (yes, really). And finally, a romantic comedy-worthy tale that starts with giving a number to a hot waiter, escalates with running over a deer, an
8: My Ex’s Family Stalked Me on Our First Date
This week on Chris vs. the People, Chris dives headfirst into the most unhinged corner of the internet—real-life wild stories from callers that sound way too chaotic to be true (but unfortunately are). First, a woman discovers her boyfriend's insane criminal past thanks to her 15-year-old sister’s FBI-level sleuthing. Then, a girl accidentally gets her brother jumped by three guys and… never tells
7: My Boss Hid a Camera in the Bathroom
In this chaotic, unfiltered episode of Chris vs. The People, Chris dives into some of the most jaw-dropping listener stories yet. First up: a seemingly normal job interview at a female-only gym takes a dark turn when the owner’s behavior gets real shady—and eventually lands him in jail. Then, Chris talks to a caller working at a hospital where workplace drama escalates into a a steamy hookup in th
6: My Boyfriend Faked His Own Death
This episode is packed with wild twists, jaw-dropping drama, and a whole lot of chaos. Chris dives into stories from listeners that include a messy summer camp relationship explosion, quitting a nightmare job at a trampoline park, a New Year’s party that went down without the host, and the ultimate betrayal — a boyfriend who pretended to die for two years... and then texted "hey." Yep. You read th
5: My Grandpa Shot His Mistress
This episode is pure chaos—in the best way. Chris kicks things off with a caller who recalls confronting her girlfriend’s ex-wife at her front door, voice memo receipts and all. Then, we hear about a great-grandfather who shot his mistress (yes, seriously), a girl who peed on her driveway before curb-stomping a crackhead, and a daughter who exposed her mom’s Second Life affair with screenshots rea
4: Robbed on the First Date
In this chaotic and laugh-out-loud fourth episode of Chris vs. The People, Chris dives headfirst into stories of messy weddings, nightmare coworkers, forbidden office romances, and wild teenage antics. From a bride telling off her drama-stirring sister-in-law to a bank employee who literally pooped on the job, this episode delivers unfiltered, hilarious, and occasionally jaw-dropping tales. Plus,
3: Sending My Ex to Jail
Chris gets into a wide variety of topics in today’s episode — from calling out a mother in law, to walking out on a friendship of 15 years, to waffle stomping and sending exes to jail. As if that wasn’t enough, a sister vents about her very own sister who slept with her ex and a young woman who divulges everything regarding her dad stealing cars. It’s all over the place but in the best way possibl
2: Bathroom Hookups and Secret Husbands
Chris dives into chaos with callers spilling their wildest secrets — from a janitor’s late-night Grindr hookup at work, to being bathed in paint thinner as a toddler, to uncovering a secret child through a denied passport. Plus, a candid chat about body image and quitting weed, and a jaw-dropping story about a girlfriend who turned out to be married and pregnant. It’s unhinged, hilarious, and unex
1: Taking a Weed Break
In the first episode, Chris kicks of Chris vs. The People with phone calls that will be putting Dr. Phil out of business. The first caller dives into unrequited love and emotional unavailability, all while forgetting to share a small little detail with the listeners. Next up, a caller asks for advice on taking a weed break, which becomes much deeper than intended, while another caller discusses th
Introducing: Chris vs. The People
Chris vs. The People is a weekly podcast where comedian, Chris Klemens, turns to you. Imagine your brutally honest best friend as a call-in operator—ready to talk about anything. From couples counseling and deep chats to airing out dirty laundry, you never know if Chris is with you or against the people, but you can find out every Tuesday.
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