Joy Recovery Radio
Joy Recovery Radio is hosted by Jacqueline and Roy, also known as Team Joy, who offer hope, healing, and practical tools for couples dealing with sex addiction and betrayal trauma. Drawing from their own experiences, they share expertise and the latest research in each episode. They testify that healing and recovery are possible, and provide additional resources, coaching, and live webinars through their website joy-recovery.com.
Episodes
S2 E37 | Why She Asks the Same Question Forty Times
You've answered her question ten times. Maybe forty. So why does she keep asking?
Roy opens with the sigh he made "on about 100 occasions" when his wife asked a question he had already answered. Then he explains what took him years to see. Deception corrupts a partner's record of her own life, and her repeated questions are how she checks that record. Every calm, honest answer is one more data poi
S2 E36 | What Her Wound Actually Needs
Job's friends sat with him in silence for seven days. It was the best thing they did. Then they started explaining his pain to him.
Roy spent nearly two years after discovery being that kind of friend. In this episode he walks through the three things a betrayal wound needs: every emotion expressed safely, every question answered honestly and every motive explored. All three ask one thing of the m
S2 E35 | How Men Actually Change
Why can a man understand his patterns and speak fluent recovery language, yet stay the same man a year later? Many couples live with that question. In this episode, Roy takes it on directly.
Recorded live during our webinar How Men Actually Change, this teaching lays out the model of change we use with men who have caused harm through deceptive sexual behavior. Roy explains why trying harder keep
S2 E34 | Stop Trying to Get Your Wife Back
Most men in recovery are working hard. The problem is what the work is aimed at.
This episode takes apart a pattern that shows up in almost every man's recovery after discovery day: the private contract. It's the deal a man writes in his own head without realizing he's writing it. If I go to therapy, if I do a disclosure, if I hand over the passwords, if I learn empathy, then she should trust me,
S2 E33 | The Three Jobs of Real Recovery
Most men walk into recovery overwhelmed. Sponsor, therapist, workbooks, disclosure, inner child, attachment styles, triggers, 12 steps, couples check-ins. All of it can help, and none of it is a map. Roy brings recovery down to its DNA: three jobs. Tell the truth. Face the harm. Live one life.
Sobriety is the floor. It's the entry ticket, not the work. What comes after it is integrity, impact, and
S2 E32 | You Trained Her Not to Trust You
Seven months into being honest, I started a sentence with my wife that I never finished. "I've been honest with you for seven months now." She heard the rest of it anyway, and so did I: so you should trust me by now.
That was an invoice. Underneath it was an internal ledger, and underneath the ledger was entitlement that survived my sobriety and showed up in my recovery wearing a different voice.
S2 E31 | Integrity Abuse: Why You Keep Harming Her and How to Stop
For two years after D-Day, Jacqueline would bring me her grief, her anger, or a question she had already asked, and I would get defensive. My working theory was that if she would change her end of it, even by 10%, I could manage mine better. That theory asked the person I injured to tone down her trauma so I could be more comfortable.
What got us out was one key I had never considered.
In this epi
S2 E30 | When She Knows More About HIs Recovery That He Does
She Knows More About His Recovery Than He Does
A listener sent us this question: "When does a betrayed partner's expertise in recovery accidentally become scaffolding that prevents the betrayer from developing his own?"
We spend the whole episode on it, starting with the one word in that question that would make everything else land wrong if we let it stand: accidentally.
Roy and Jacqueline walk t
S2 E29 | Right Sight: Overcoming Objectification
Somewhere in the last hour, you sized someone up from a single look. Your mind took one piece of information and wrote a whole biography. In this solo episode, Roy makes the case that the machinery producing those instant biographies is the same machinery that built the secret basement many men are now trying to dismantle.
Sexual objectification is one room in a much bigger house. If you only reno
S2 E28 | Listening Without Self-Referencing: The Hardest Skill in Recovery
He can be silent, nod, even say all the right words, and still not be listening. In this episode, Roy defines the skill that often determines whether a relationship has any chance of becoming safe again: listening without self-reference.
For the men, this is a behavioral capacity, observable and binary. After working with hundreds of men, Roy has not yet met one who had this skill out of the gate
S2 E27 | Your Wife is Grieving Someone Who Never Existed: Here's Your Job
Hurricane Katrina came ashore more than twenty years ago. Some neighborhoods came back stronger than before. Others still sit under blue tarps. That is the most honest map we know of a betrayed partner's inner world.
This episode is about the parts of the harm that do not get repaired, no matter how much a man changes. We talk about why fixing feels safer than feeling, the losses that discovery le
S2 E26 | Dismantling Defensiveness for Good
A man named Daniel wrote in. Eleven months sober and honest, full disclosure done, and one night his wife looked at him in the kitchen and called him a monster. Everything in him rose up to fight back. He recited his eleven months like a resume, and it got worse from there. His questions: how does a man just stand there and take that, and is there a point where her words become abuse against him?
S2 E25 | Does the Minwalla Model Silence Men?
Men come into this work and land on the same conclusion: the model wants them gone. In this episode I take that complaint seriously, and then I take it apart.
Everything here rests on one condition. Active deception has ended. If you're still holding one secret, one withheld detail, this episode isn't for you yet. You don't have a voice problem. You have an integrity problem, and the only assignme
S2 E24 | The Recovery Wall - What Happens When Fear No Longer Drives Change
After exposure or disclosure, a lot of men change fast. They stop the behavior. They go to therapy. They check in constantly. And from the outside, it looks like recovery.
Then the crisis fades. And somewhere between six months and two years, many men hit the wall.
In this episode, Roy unpacks what he calls the "recovery wall" — the point where fear-driven change begins to evaporate, and what was
S2 E23 | Why Empathy Training So Often Fails for Betrayers
After discovery, a lot of men start saying all the right things, and they say them fast. He tells her he understands how badly he hurt her. He cries. He apologizes for hours. And she doesn't feel any better. Sometimes she feels worse. Her body is not buying it, even when everyone around her says he's finally doing the work.
This episode is about that gap. The distance between the empathetic word
S2 E22 | (Listener Question) When You're Innocent and She Doesn't Believe You
A listener wrote in with a question a lot of men in recovery are sitting with. He's about a year past discovery, working on his integrity, and honest enough to admit he still shades the truth sometimes in the moment. His question: what do you do when your partner accuses you of something you genuinely did not do, and how do you say no without getting defensive or setting off another trigger?
Roy t
S2 E21 | The Five Systems of Integrity Abuse
Most men assume the lying stops once they get caught, because there is nothing left to hide. That is almost never what happens. The same instrument that built the secret sexual life keeps working long after exposure. It just changes jobs.
In this episode, Roy walks through a hard truth about deceptive sexuality: the primary tool was never the burner phone or the deleted history. It was the voice.
S2 E20 | Shame Tolerance vs Shame Collapse
Joy Recovery Radio — Shame Collapse, Shame Tolerance, and the Compass of Shame
This episode is an excerpt from a live teaching inside the Joy Recovery Academy, co-hosted by Roy and Jacqueline.
Most men in recovery from integrity abuse mistake shame collapse for remorse. It looks like deep emotion, hanging the head, self-condemning statements — and it almost always works to reorganize the room arou
S2 E19: What "I've Told You Everything" Actually Means
Most betrayed partners have heard the sentence "I've already told you everything." In this episode, Roy and Jacqueline examine why that phrase—and four others like it—almost never function as honesty, even when the man saying it believes he's being truthful.
We walk through what partial disclosure actually is and why it's the second deception, the five sentences that sound like full disclosure but
S2 E18: Her Hypervigilance is Information (And What It's Actually Telling You)
Most of what gets called hypervigilance in a betrayed partner is not a malfunction. It is information. In this solo episode, Roy reframes what her nervous system is actually doing after the discovery of deceptive sexuality — and tells the men listening how to receive that information without defending against it.
The episode addresses partners briefly, then spends the bulk of its time with the men
S2 E17: Image Management After Betrayal
If compartmentalization is the architecture of the hidden life, image management is the architecture of the visible one. It's the version of you the world has been applauding for decades — the persona at work, at church, at the family gathering — and it's one of the hardest patterns to dismantle in recovery, precisely because it's been so well rewarded.
In this episode, Roy and Jacqueline walk thr
S2 E16: Minwalla Model: Compartmentalization, or How Someone Can Live Two Lives
This episode of Joy Recovery Radio explains clinical compartmentalization in betrayal as the deliberate maintenance of separate internal realities, using Dr. Minwalla’s “secret sexual basement” metaphor: a hidden world supported by lies, entitlement, covert operations, and ongoing maintenance. It describes how the decision to hide behavior builds the “basement,” distorting the betrayed partner’s s
S2 E15: [Minwalla Model] Treatment-Induced Trauma
Treatment-Induced Trauma (Trauma Room 22) in Betrayal Recovery | DST / Minwalla Model Explained
Jacqueline and Roy of Joy Recovery Radio explain Dr. Omar Minwalla’s Deceptive Sexuality and Trauma (DST) Model with a focus on Trauma Room 22: treatment-induced trauma—harm caused by clinical interventions or serious omissions by professional helpers. They describe how sobriety-centric sex addiction
S2 E14: The Four Layers of Real Change
Roy shares a case of a client who stopped acting out, followed recovery steps, and gained insight, yet his partner still doesn’t trust him—because stopping behavior isn’t the same as becoming a different person. He explains four layers of change: insight (understanding the problem), behavior (stopping acting out/sobriety), emotional capacity (tolerating shame, confrontation, and a partner’s repeat
S2 E13: Why is the Betrayer So Defensive?
In this episode of Joy Recovery Radio, Roy explains how defensiveness and reactivity show up after betrayal and deceptive sexuality, arguing they are not communication issues but recovery and harm issues within the Minwalla model’s integrity abuse framework. He defines defensiveness as a functional behavior that blocks accountability and reactivity as the physiological nervous system activation th
S2 E12: The Entitlement You CAN'T See
In this solo episode of Joy Recovery Radio, Roy explores covert, pre-conscious entitlement that can fuel deceptive sexuality and relational harm—especially in men who appear generous, responsible, and respected. He defines entitlement as a belief system that prioritizes one person’s desires and access over another’s rights, reality, and safety, and explains how it often centers on “access” to a s
S2 E11: Three Motivations Behind Betrayal
Joy Recovery Radio explains infidelity through the Deceptive Sexuality and Trauma (DST) model, emphasizing that the primary injury is integrity abuse—the hidden “secret sexual basement” of deception, manipulation, and gaslighting. Roy & Jacqueline outline three core motivational drivers: escape (acting out to avoid internal pain and regulate emotions), entitlement (compulsive entitled sexualit
S2 E10: Why Reassurance Doesn't Relieve Betrayal Anxiety - and What Does
This episode explains why verbal reassurance often fails to calm betrayal anxiety after discovery or disclosure, because sustained deception breaks the pre-betrayal equation that words equal reality and trains a partner’s nervous system not to trust the betrayer’s voice. Drawing on the Minwalla model’s concept of DCSR (a deceptive, compartmentalized sexual relational reality), it describes how rep
S2 E09: The Betrayer’s Pathway - The 4 Stages of Real Recovery
This episode of Joy Recovery Radio explains the proper sequence of the Four I’s in betrayal recovery and why couples can do harm by pursuing reconnection before a foundation of integrity is established. The hosts define integrity as the full elimination of deception and emphasize it must be observed over time, not declared. They describe impact as authentically facing and holding the partner’s inj
S2 E08: Why Betrayal Recovery Feels So Confusing (And What's Actually Happening)
This episode of Joy Recovery Radio explains why both betrayed partners and those rebuilding integrity often feel confused and stuck after sexual betrayal, emphasizing that the disorientation is not a personal failure but a “map problem” caused by a multi-layered injury affecting psychological, relational, neurological, spiritual, and moral dimensions. The hosts describe the demoralizing recovery c
S2 E07 Why Sobriety is Not Enough After Betrayal
Joy Recovery Radio explains ethical containment in betrayal recovery as the person who caused harm willingly removing access to the tools used to harm in order to restore safety. The hosts clarify it is not punishment, control, or paranoia, and emphasize that the measure of progress is safety, not sobriety. Through a story about Marcus refusing to delete a messaging app and the impact on Beverly’s
S2 E06: Why Insight is NOT Change
Why His Insight Doesn’t Make You Feel Safe After Betrayal (Insight vs. Accountability)
This episode of Joy Recovery Radio explains why a partner’s remorse, emotional insight, and trauma language after betrayal can still feel unsafe to the betrayed partner. The host clarifies that insight is cognitive and can reduce the betrayer’s internal tension, but safety is built through sustained, predictab
S2 EP05 Why Recovery So Often Goes Wrong
In this episode of Joy Recovery Radio, the hosts discuss a common conflict in betrayal recovery: the betrayer’s urgency to “move on” and return to normal versus the betrayed partner’s need for stability, safety, and consistency. They explain that healing speeds up when it isn’t pushed because pressure activates fear while safety activates repair, and they describe how rushing—pressuring for forgiv
S2 E04: Three Substitutes for Safety & What Actually Creates It
In this episode of Joy Recovery Radio, we discuss why insight, remorse, and emotional intensity are often mistaken for real change in betrayal recovery. These three substitutes may feel convincing but do not create true safety in relationships. We introduce the ACT framework, which stands for Awareness, Containment, and Transformation, to outline the conditions necessary for genuine recovery and e
S2 E03: Betrayal is NOT a Relationship Issue
Why Betrayal is Not a Relationship Problem | Joy Recovery Radio
In this episode of Joy Recovery Radio, we delve into the intricate nature of betrayal, emphasizing that betrayal is fundamentally an integrity issue with relational consequences—not a relationship problem. We dissect common misconceptions in betrayal recovery, focusing on the importance of addressing power imbalances, manipulated real
S2 E02: DARVO - The Hidden Pattern of Manipulation (pt 2)
In this episode of Joy Recovery Radio, we dive deep into the concept of DARVO (Deny, Attack, and Reverse Victim and Offender) and its impact on betrayal recovery. This is part two of a two-part series where we explore the specific trauma injuries caused by DARVO, how it functions as integrity abuse, and the steps for real-time accountability. We provide a simulated example of a DARVO conversation
S2 E01: DARVO - The Hidden Pattern of Manipulation (pt 1)
Welcome back to Joy Recovery Radio! In this episode, we tackle the concept of DARVO (Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim, and Offender), a deeply damaging form of psychological abuse common in betrayal and deception scenarios. We'll define DARVO, demonstrate how it appears in real conversations, and distinguish between normal defensiveness and abusive DARVO role reversal. This episode aims to raise aware
Season 2 Trailer | Joy Recovery Radio
Season 2 of Joy Recovery Radio continues the conversation about integrity, betrayal trauma, and what real recovery actually requires. In this brief trailer, we share what’s ahead in the upcoming season, including deeper teaching on integrity abuse, trauma-informed accountability, and the long-term work of becoming honest, loving, and whole. Season 2 launches next week.
Free Assessment: Is the Re
Ep 47: Breaking the Pursuer/Avoider Cycle for Good
In this episode, Roy and Jacqueline discuss the common 'Pursuer-Avoider Cycle' that many couples face after sexual infidelity and betrayal trauma. They share personal experiences, practical strategies, and deep insights on how to break free from this cycle. Learn how to identify primary and secondary emotions, and discover actionable steps for both pursuers and avoiders to foster healing and conne
Ep 46: The False Self: How We Hide, Perform, and Protect - and How to Break Free
In today's episode, we explore how understanding the shadow and false self impacts our spiritual and personal growth. Learn about practical spiritual practices such as the daily examen, solitude and silence, seeking feedback in community, and confession. These practices help dismantle the false self and expose the shadow, facilitating healing and transformation. Join us as we provide deep insights
Ep 45: Understanding and Managing His Intrusive Thoughts: A Guide for Couples
In this episode, we delve deep into the complexities couples face when recovering from sexual infidelity and betrayal trauma. We explore the nature of intrusive thoughts, differentiating them from fantasies, and discuss why daily confession of these thoughts can be more harmful than helpful. Learn how to build healthful accountability, understand the neuroscience behind intrusive thoughts, and dis
Ep 44: "Why Can't I Have A Normal Life Again?"
In this episode of Joy Recovery Radio, we delve into the profound question, 'Why can't I have a normal life again?' after sexual infidelity and betrayal trauma. We explore the deep-rooted longing for normalcy, the illusion of the old 'normal', and the true meaning of freedom and recovery. Whether you're the betrayed partner or the one recovering from addiction, this episode offers valuable insight
Ep 43 - Cost of Devaluing Women: From Objectification to Empathy
In this episode, we explore the complexities of healing from sexual infidelity and betrayal trauma. Join us as we delve into the psychology and theology of objectification, the impact of addiction and betrayal on relationships, and practical steps for recovery. Learn how to rebuild trust, restore value, and find true intimacy. Whether you are battling addiction, healing from betrayal, or rebuildin
Ep 42: When Trying Fails - How Training Heals What Effort Can’t
In this episode, we delve into the profound impact of spiritual practices on healing and transformation, particularly for couples facing sexual infidelity and betrayal trauma. Host shares insights on how stories, relationships, and habits shape us, and explores the power of spiritual practices like prayer, fasting, and community. Discover how to train, not just try, for lasting change and inner pe
Ep 41: How We Change (Part 2) - The Work
In this episode, we explore how to experience holistic transformation by understanding the five integrated parts of the human person: spirit, mind, body, relationships, and soul. We discuss the importance of intentional spiritual formation, the impact of passive and active influences on our lives, and practical strategies for countering unintentional habits and negative stories. Join us as we dive
Ep 40: How We Change (Part 1): The Drift
In this episode, we explore whether the advice to 'be yourself' is beneficial and delve into the concept of spiritual formation. Learn about the stories we believe, the habits we practice, and the relationships that shape us. We'll also discuss how to break free from addiction and grow into our best selves through spiritual renewal. Whether you're an addict or a betrayed partner, our community and
Ep 39: Truth vs. Transparency
In this episode of Joy Recovery Radio, we explore the critical difference between truth and transparency in the journey to healing after sexual infidelity and betrayal trauma. Our hosts discuss the importance of proactive transparency versus reactive truth, and how these approaches impact trust and emotional intimacy in relationships. Through real-life examples and practical strategies, we aim to
Ep 38: The Brain's Delete Button: Erase Years of P*rn Viewing
In this episode, we delve into the fascinating connection between brain science and spiritual principles in the journey to overcome porn addiction. Discover how your brain works like a computer, capable of pruning unwanted habits while nurturing healthy ones. Learn practical strategies for rewiring your brain, supported by both scientific insights and biblical wisdom. We also share inspiring real-
Ep 37: How to Become a Non-Anxious Presence
In this episode, we dive deep into the concept of becoming a non-anxious presence during the challenging journey of recovery from sexual infidelity and betrayal trauma. We discuss the profound insights from Edwin Friedman's leadership theories and how they apply to emotional and spiritual regression in the modern world. Discover how a non-anxious presence can break the cycle of anxiety driven by r
Ep 36: From Pain to Purpose
Welcome back to Joy Recovery Radio! In today's episode, we delve deep into the transformative and challenging journey of forgiveness, especially in the wake of sexual infidelity and betrayal trauma. Hear real stories, practical strategies, and insights on how forgiveness can change your life. Listen as we tackle common misconceptions about forgiveness and explore its different dimensions—whether i
EP 35: "Why Is She Trying to Control Me, When Can I Have My Freedom Back?"
This episode is dedicated to helping couples recover from sexual infidelity and betrayal trauma. We explain how partners in recovery can proactively create safety to rebuild trust. Discover practical strategies and mindset shifts necessary to overcome the trauma and create a new, healthier relationship. Hear about the importance of transparency, accountability, and humility along with real-life ex
EP 34: R.U.L.E.R. - Five Skills for Emotional Maturity
Welcome to Joy Recovery Radio! In this episode, we delve into the complexities of emotional intelligence in recovering from sexual infidelity and betrayal trauma. We share insights from a webinar on Emotional Intelligence, exploring the concept of 'airplane mode' in addiction and how to re-engage emotionally. Learn about the Circumplex Model of Emotions, the power of recognizing and labeling emoti
Ep 33: The Deeper Longing Behind Every Addiction
Join us on Joy Recovery Radio as we explore the journey of healing and hope after sexual infidelity and betrayal trauma. This episode delves into the transformative power of the 12-step program, inspired by the Beatitudes, and how these spiritual practices can restore brokenness and lead to a more abundant life. Learn how intimate connection with God, self, and others plays a critical role in reco
Ep 32: Five Levels of Empathy: Rebuilding Trust and Connection
In this episode of Joy Recovery Radio, we explore the crucial role of empathy in healing relationships after sexual infidelity and betrayal trauma. Learn practical strategies and deep insights to enhance your empathic abilities. We discuss the definition of empathy, barriers to becoming empathic, and the five levels of empathy using the Carkhuff Empathy Scale. Discover how empathic communication c
Ep 31: Breaking the Chains of Self-Deception
Breaking the Chains of Self-Deception: Healing After Infidelity | Joy Recovery Radio
Welcome back to Joy Recovery Radio! In this episode, we dive deep into the role of self-deception in addiction, especially related to sexual infidelity and betrayal trauma. We explore how self-deception is foundational to addiction, the ways it manifests, and practical strategies to overcome it. Learn about the im
Ep 30: I Was an Abuser - Here's How I Stopped
In this episode of Joy Recovery Radio, we discuss the critical issue of abusive behavior among sex addicts, through the lens of the Minwalla model and biblical teachings. We emphasize the importance of personal accountability and rejecting abusive behavior. Host Roy expands on how abusive behavior and addiction stem from the same root issue—a heart of pride—and explains how cultivating a heart of
Ep 29 - Healing Resentments: The Four-Phase Forgiveness Journey
In today's episode, we explore an excerpt from our Conscious Contact group focusing on the spiritual side of recovery. Learn from expert teachings, including a four-phase process inspired by Dr. Robert Enright and the teachings of Jesus, to identify, process, and work through resentments. We delve into exploring resentments, committing to change, the work of forgiveness, and achieving freedom from
Ep 28: Is Lying a Co-Addiction for Sex Addicts?
In this episode of Joy Recovery Radio, we delve into the intricate relationship between deception and sex addiction. Discover the science of what happens in the brain when we lie, the role of the prefrontal cortex, amygdala, and nucleus accumbens, and how chronic dishonesty can affect cognitive function and emotional regulation. Learn about the potential for neuroplasticity and actionable steps to
Ep 27: (Minwalla Model IAD Series) - The Deception & Manipulation Playbook
Welcome to Joy Recovery Radio, where we provide insights, strategies, and real-life stories to help couples heal after sexual infidelity and betrayal trauma. In this episode, hosts Roy and Jacqueline introduce a new series on the Minwalla Model's IAD Behaviors, diving deep into deception and manipulation. Discover how deceit, from bold-faced lies to gaslighting, impacts both parties and learn stra
Ep 26: Relationship Rescue: 10 Essential Traits
In this episode, we discuss the top 10 key traits essential for rebuilding trust and intimacy in relationships affected by infidelity. Join us as we share our stories, strategies, and insights on how to navigate the path of recovery together. From the importance of full disclosure to cultivating emotional intimacy and developing a shared vision for the future, we cover all the critical steps neede
Ep 25: The H.E.L.P. Tool for Men - Unlocking Emotional Vulnerability
In this episode, we're diving deep into the critical role of emotional intimacy in relationships, especially post-betrayal. Join Roy and Jacqueline as they introduce the revolutionary HELP tool designed to help men cultivate vulnerability, create new neural pathways, and redefine masculinity. Discover practical strategies to rebuild trust, enhance emotional connection, and start a transformative m
Ep 24: Why Can't Men Express Emotions? And What To Do About It
In this episode of Joy Recovery Radio, we explore why men often struggle with emotional attunement and how this impacts their recovery journey after betrayal trauma and sexual infidelity. Discover key insights into emotional intelligence (EQ), the 'man box' concept, and how societal norms influence men's emotional expression. Learn five main reasons men struggle emotionally and five actionable str
Ep 23: Healing After Betrayal - 12 Do's & 5 Don'ts FOR MEN
In this episode of Joy Recovery Radio, we discuss how couples can navigate the journey of healing after sexual infidelity and betrayal trauma. We emphasize the importance of transparency, acceptance, and support, providing men with practical guidance through 12 essential actions and 5 critical mistakes to avoid. Our conversation draws on the expertise of Dr. William Clark, Dr. Ken McGill, Dr. Omar
Ep 22: Stephen Cabler (Part 2) - The Ultimate Guide to Disclosure Polygraphs
Welcome to Joy Recovery Radio! In this eye-opening episode, we explore the profound impact of polygraphs in the journey of healing from sexual infidelity and betrayal trauma. Our special guest, Stephen Cabler, a renowned polygraph examiner, shares his extensive expertise and real-life experiences in polygraph testing for sex addiction recovery. Listen in as Stephen discusses the process, benefits,
Ep 21: Stephen Cabler (Part 1) - The Ultimate Guide to Disclosure Polygraphs
Welcome to Joy Recovery Radio! In this episode, we dive deep into the world of polygraphs for betrayal recovery with polygraph expert Stephen Cabler. Discover essential insights on preparing for full disclosures, uncovering the truth, and utilizing polygraphs as a tool for healing and rebuilding trust. Stephen shares his extensive experience, success stories, and personal anecdotes that provide ho
Ep 20: "How Can We Ever Go on Vacation Again?" The Beach and Beyond after Betrayal
Join us for another episode of Joy Recovery Radio, where we dive into traveling post-betrayal and infidelity. Hosts Roy and Jacqueline discuss the challenges and strategies for safe traveling, sharing six essential lessons learned and a five-step process they use. Whether you're planning a beach vacation or navigating local events, this episode offers valuable insights into maintaining safety and
Ep 19: Understanding the 7 Types of Love for Relational Recovery
Welcome to Joy Recovery Radio. In this episode, we explore seven different types of love according to the ancient Greeks and discuss which ones are vital for creating a new, intimate relationship after betrayal. We delve into the characteristics and roles of Eros, Phileo, Storge, Ludus, Mania, Pragma, and Agape, and how they each contribute to healing and rebuilding trust. We also provide practica
EP 18: Latest Research: Which Sex Addiction Recovery Method Works Best?
Welcome to this episode of Joy Recovery Radio! Today, we delve into groundbreaking research comparing five interventions for sex addiction recovery: willpower, mindfulness, awe, life meaning and purpose, and distraction. Discover which intervention proved most effective in reducing desire and increasing self-agency among addicts. Learn about meaning-centered recovery, the concept of existential va
Ep 17: Is Sex a Need?
In this emotionally charged episode of Joy Recovery Radio, we delve into the controversial topic of whether sex is a need. Our host, drawing from expertise in behavior science, theology, and personal experience with sexual integrity issues, argues that sex is a desire rather than a necessity. This discussion is primarily geared towards men struggling with sex addiction, but it is not intended for
Ep 16: The Minwalla Model Part 2: What is Deceptive Sexuality Trauma?
In this episode of Joy Recovery Radio, we continue exploring the Minwalla model by diving into Deceptive Compartmentalized Sexual Relational Reality (DCSR) and its impacts. Building on part one, we discuss the secret sexual basement analogy, deceptive sexuality, trauma on victims, and the next steps for both betrayers and victims. Join us as we delve into the unique form of trauma caused by decept
Ep 15: The Minwalla Model Part 1: Unpacking Deceptive Sexuality & Integrity Abuse
Understanding the Minwalla Model: Deceptive Sexuality and Integrity Abuse Disorder - Joy Recovery Radio Welcome to Joy Recovery Radio's new multi-part series exploring the Minwalla Model. In this episode, we delve into the concepts of deceptive sexuality and integrity abuse disorder, explaining how these issues result in unique forms of trauma for all involved. This educational content is designed
Ep 14: Are These Recovery Myths Holding You Back?
In this compelling episode of Joy Recovery Radio, we dive deep into myths and misconceptions surrounding addiction and recovery. Focusing on the concept of powerlessness, we emphasize the importance of free will and mental autonomy in overcoming addictive behaviors. Challenging the belief that addiction is an involuntary condition, we explore how personal choice and perspective shifts play a criti
Ep 13: Why is He So Emotionally Distant? Inside the Mind of a Sex Addict
In this episode of Joy Recovery Radio, we delve into the complex topic of emotional distance by exploring the mindset of a sex addict. Share in a personal journey to understand why intimacy is often avoided and emotions suppressed. Learn about Dr. Minwalla's concept of Integrity Abuse Disorder (IAD) behaviors and the fight, flight, and freeze responses. The episode also discusses how deeply embedd
Ep 12: The Relapse Map
In this episode of Joy Recovery Radio, we delve into the crucial topic of relapse in addiction recovery. The discussion includes differentiating between relapse and slip, and the importance of recognizing and discarding the term 'slip' from recovery vocabulary. The episode introduces a 'threat detection tool,' comprising three concentric circles representing 'acting out,' 'acting in,' and various
Ep 11: The Silent Relationship KILLER You Must Avoid At All Costs
In this episode of Joy Recovery Radio, we delve into the insidious and often overlooked issue of invalidation in relationships. Host [Host Name] provides a comprehensive look at what invalidation is, how it manifests, and its devastating effects on both individuals and their relationships. Through research and expert insights, you’ll learn about the long-term emotional damage caused by invalidatio
Ep 10: Improve Communication - How Imago Dialogue Transforms Relationships
Welcome to the final episode of our three-part series on intimacy! In this episode of Joy Recovery Radio, we delve into the Imago Dialogue, an effective communication tool created by Harville Hendricks and Helen Hunt to bridge communication gaps in relationships. Learn about the history and principles of the Imago Dialogue, how to practice it, and its major benefits, including psychological safet
Ep 9: Intimacy Series - Rethinking Check-Ins
In this episode of Joy Recovery Radio, we dive into the importance and practice of daily check-ins for building emotional intimacy in relationships. Continuing our three-part series on intimacy, we discuss why intimacy with God and self is foundational before one can achieve true intimacy with others. We introduce and break down the FANOS method (Feelings, Appreciation, Needs, Ownership, Struggles
Ep 8: Intimacy with God, Self, and Others
Welcome to another episode of Joy Recovery Radio! We're diving into a three-part series on intimacy, starting with self intimacy. Discover how understanding and connecting with yourself can transform your relationship and help overcome shame and addiction. Learn the importance of self intimacy, the framework of shame, and how intimacy with God, self, and others paves the path to true recovery. We'
Ep 7: Acting Out vs Acting In
Welcome to another episode of Joy Recovery Radio, where we delve into the concept of 'acting in' as opposed to 'acting out.' Using insights from psychologist Donald Nathanson's work on shame, we explore the core wounds of insignificance, incompetence, and impotence that often drive shame-based belief systems. Learn about Nathanson's 'compass of shame' and the four poles of shame responses: avoidin
Ep 6: His Triggers and Her Triggers
In this episode of Joy Recovery Radio, hosts Roy and Jacqueline delve into the complex topic of triggers, particularly emotional and trauma triggers experienced by both men and women. They discuss the impact of broken trust and how it can generate intense emotional and trauma responses. The couple shares personal stories and practical approaches to manage and reduce triggers, while emphasizing th
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