Dads Dating After Divorce
Dallas Bluth and Jude Sandvall share practical advice and strategies for fathers who are re-entering the dating world after divorce. Drawing on their work with dads and men at BlackBoxDating.com and TheDivorcedDadvocate.com, they discuss how modern dating has changed and how to handle it while raising kids. The podcast offers real-world insights for divorced dads looking to navigate relationships.
Episodes
42 - Airplane Mode For Your Ex
Your ex doesn’t have to ruin your new relationship, but if you don’t build structure, she can rent space in your head 24/7. We get real about what happens when dating after divorce moves from casual to committed: you’re seeing someone consistently, you’re thinking about introducing the kids, and suddenly the “gatekeeper” ex starts blowing up your phone. We share a simple tactical move that actuall
41 - Stop Chasing a Six Pack and Start Building Real Confidence
If you’re a dad dating after divorce, the loudest advice online usually points to vanity: get shredded, flex harder, post the perfect Hinge photo. We’re not buying it. Real confidence is built when you can rely on your body, your routines, and your leadership at home, especially when life feels chaotic and your mind won’t shut off.We talk about why physical fitness is the easiest “first domino” fo
40 - The Tom Brady Trap: Why "Too Busy" is Actually a Choice
Tom Brady says he’s too busy for a personal life, and that excuse hits different when you’re a divorced dad trying to coordinate dating around custody exchanges, work, and real-world exhaustion. We dig into what “no time” usually means, how priorities actually work, and why a lot of single fathers quietly use their kids as a shield from fear and rejection. If you’ve been telling yourself you’ll da
39 - Stability Over Performance With Special Guest Ric Taylor
Dating after divorce can turn even confident dads into performers. You start chasing the perfect opener, the perfect outfit, the perfect “game,” and somehow you feel worse after every date. We go the other direction with therapist and coach Rick Taylor: confidence is what stability looks like on the outside, and stability is something you build, not something you pretend to have.We talk about the
38 - Doing vs. Being: The Secret to Helping Her Find Her Feminine Again
Ever watch your date sprint to the hostess stand while you’re still catching up to the curb? We’ve been there—and we’re turning that awkward start into a playbook for calm leadership, real connection, and dates that feel lighter for both of you. We explore the heart of modern dating for divorced dads: helping a woman shift from doing to being by offering safety, structure, and steady presence.We b
37 - Emotional Parkour: The Tests Women Love to Throw at Men
Dating after divorce shouldn’t feel like an audit, yet so many dads find themselves fielding questions, jabs, and last-minute pivots that turn dinner into emotional parkour. We call them fortitude tests—moments where she checks whether your confidence is real, your standards are firm, and your calm isn’t just a first-date performance. In this conversation, we unpack why these tests happen, why the
36 - Porn-Induced ED: The Elephant in the Room for Divorced Dads
Is your scrolling stealing your spark? We take a hard, honest look at how porn and compulsive release drain confidence, flatten energy, and quietly sabotage your dating life as a divorced dad. Without shaming or moralizing, we walk through the real mechanics—why dopamine spikes from endless novelty skew arousal, how tolerance builds into porn-induced ED, and what hypofrontality means for your will
35 - Recreational dating with less guilt and more fun
Dating after divorce doesn’t need to be chaotic, heavy, or ruled by outdated “game” tactics. We dive deep into recreational dating as a clean, honest framework that helps dads decompress, sharpen essential skills, and choose commitment only when it’s truly earned. Starting with a listener email from New Zealand, we outline why this exploratory phase matters and how to navigate it without guilt—or
34 - Wait...since when do we send voice notes?
Dating after divorce shouldn’t feel like decoding a secret menu. We unpack the new rules of communication for 2026—where swipes, voice notes, and five-minute video vibe checks can either waste your energy or quietly fast-track you into a great first date. Our focus is simple: lead with clarity, protect your kids and privacy, and create safety so a real connection can breathe.We start by separating
33 - Certified Pre-Owned: Putting a Premium on Fatherhood
Doubt can be loud after a divorce, but what if the truth is that fatherhood is your quiet advantage? We dig into why single dads carry built-in signals of commitment, safety, and competence—qualities women instinctively value—and how to stop hiding them behind apology. From a last-minute cancellation that sparked firmer standards to the mindset reframe that shifts you from “rejected” to “I’ll let
32 - High Status Dads: What Being a Father Signals in the Dating Market
The dating world loves loud status symbols, but here’s the twist: the traits that truly move a woman’s heart are quiet, steady, and earned. We dig into why divorced dads often start with a hidden edge—preselection, proven commitment, and hard-won emotional maturity—and how to turn that advantage into real connection. Instead of chasing dominance displays, we map the path to prestige: leadership th
31 - The Kid Readiness Check: Strategies for Moving from Vetting to Blending
Dating after divorce doesn’t come with a manual, especially when your love life intersects with your kids’ lives. We break down a practical, low-drama roadmap for introducing a new partner to your children—starting with the “divorce dust” rule, where stability and finalized paperwork come before any blending. From there, we unpack the six-to-twelve-month guideline that helps you see beyond the hon
30 - Stop Flashing Your Cash: Why High-End Dinners Are False Advertising
Tired of hearing you need $200 dinners to be taken seriously? We flip that script. Jude and Dallas lay out a practical, confident way to date after divorce that prioritizes financial responsibility, creativity, and genuine connection over the social media flex. If you’ve felt the pressure to overspend or “audition” for approval, this conversation gives you a better playbook.We start with a reality
29 - Choosing One Woman: How to Avoid the "Nice Guy" Commitment Trap
The jump from casual dates to a committed relationship after divorce isn’t about perfect timing or a clever script—it’s about self-leadership. We dig into how divorced dads can date with purpose, protect their finite resources, and choose exclusivity for the right reasons: depth, clarity, and real connection. Recreational dating has a place when you’re rebuilding, but it shouldn’t be a cover for a
28 - Profile Purge & Height Embargo: 10 Rules for 2026
Ready to swap “new year, new me” for something that actually works? We break down ten real, repeatable resolutions for divorced dads who want to date with confidence, class, and a sense of humor. It starts with the pictures—no fish, no trucks, no bathroom mirrors—and moves into owning your height, improving your posture, and dressing like a man who respects himself. Shoes and watches matter more t
27 - Stocking Stuffers: Diving into Dating App Clichés
Dating apps can feel like a hall of mirrors—sarcasm, “no drama,” tacos and margs, and endless wanderlust. We decided to have some holiday fun and dig beneath the clichés to find the real signals, the hidden landmines, and the easy wins for divorced dads getting back out there. Jude brings the snark; Dallas brings the strategy. Together we translate what she might be saying and show you how to resp
26 - Single Mom Tests: Scheduling, the Ex, and Other Relationship Killers
The Brady Bunch made blending look easy; real life demands better tools. We dive straight into the third rail of post-divorce dating: should single dads date single moms, and how do you do it without drowning in scheduling chaos, ex drama, and mismatched parenting styles?We start with time, because chemistry means little if you can’t meet. You’ll hear simple scripts to express desire as a positive
25 - Emoting vs. Communicating: Give Her the Release She Needs
Dating after divorce can feel like the Wild West—especially when emotions run high and the old rules no longer apply. We dig into one of the most misunderstood dynamics in modern relationships: the difference between emoting and communicating, and why confusing the two keeps couples locked in loops. With Jude Samval of The Divorce Advocate and Dallas Bluth of Black Box Dating, we unpack how men’s
24 - Who Pays on the First Date?
The first date “Who pays?” moment can tank chemistry or lift the whole night—and after divorce, the stakes feel even higher. We dig into the chivalry paradox: honoring equality while still creating romance, leading without controlling, and paying without turning the bill into a negotiation. Our goal is simple: help you build experiences that feel generous, safe, and fun, not transactional.We start
23 - Secrets to Cold Approach: How to Leverage Scarcity and Get Her Number
Swiping promises abundance; real life delivers clarity. We’re talking about how divorced dads can ditch the dependency on apps and create warm, natural conversations anywhere—grocery lines, coffee shops, hardware stores—that actually lead to dates. The secret isn’t a magic line. It’s state, presence, and a clear invitation delivered with respect.We start by breaking down why in-person beats online
22 - Let's Talk About Sex: Leading Her to Intimacy, One Touch at a Time
Most men try to plan their way to great sex and end up killing the spark. We take a different route: build trust with clear statements, create a protected space for intimacy, and then let go of the plan so real desire can surprise you both.We start by resetting the premise. Sex after divorce isn’t a sprint; it’s a craft. Jude Sandvall and Dallas Bluth unpack why safety and mutual benefit are the f
21 - Let's Get Physical: The Art Of Escalation
If touch has felt confusing after divorce—too fast, too formal, or just plain awkward—this conversation gives you a clear path from grounded presence to real chemistry. Jude and Dallas unpack the missing link many men never learned: how to make physical contact a normal, human bridge to connection long before it turns romantic. You’ll hear why American men often oversexualize touch, how to rebuild
20 - Kids or No Kids: Who Should You Date After Divorce?
Dating after divorce can feel like rebuilding a house on old foundations—and that’s exactly why we argue for a full scrape and rebuild. We get real about the question every single dad faces on the apps: her kids, my kids, or no kids? Instead of chasing a replacement for your ex, we lay out a simple, practical framework for designing the next chapter with intention—starting with clear values, vivid
19 - Checklists are Sexy: Lead Her with Clarity, One Step at a Time
New relationships don’t need a contract; they need direction. We dig into the messy, exciting space after a few dates where interest is real, logistics are heavy, and you’re wondering how to move from casual to committed without killing the spark. As divorced dads, we know the stakes are higher—kids, calendars, and hard-won lessons—so we break down a practical way to lead with clarity while keepin
18 - From Availability To Attraction
Ever get a “let me check my schedule” that drifts into silence? We unpack why availability feels confusing, how to read it without taking it personally, and what to do instead of pushing for a plan. Our focus: inviting, not burdening. You’ll learn how to craft vivid, low‑pressure invitations, keep your energy consistent after the first spark, and swap the effort mindset for a cleaner metric—respon
17 - From Checklists to Chemistry: Decoding Her Dating Profile
Ever stare at a profile and think, What does any of this actually mean? We go straight at the modern maze of dating after divorce—where “active,” “preferably no kids,” and political banners can make or break a match before you’ve said hello. As two dads who’ve lived the post-divorce reboot, we break down how to read between the lines, when to move on, and how to show up with humor and direction in
16 - Green Flags & Gut Checks: What Makes a Great Partner After Divorce
Red flags are easy to spot. What’s harder—and far more useful—is training your eye for the green flags that tell you a relationship can actually work. We dive into the signals that matter most for dads dating after divorce: respect for fatherhood, emotional maturity, and consistency that builds trust instead of anxiety. You’ll hear how to test for these qualities without games, just clear beliefs,
15 - Dating Younger: Fantasy or Fulfillment?
The dating world doesn't come with a rulebook, especially for those navigating it after divorce. In this candid conversation, Jude and Dallas tackle the recent controversy surrounding the Golden Bachelor's age preferences and what it reveals about the complex world of dating in midlife.When 66-year-old Mel Owens stated he preferred to date women between 45-60, the backlash was immediate.
14 - Dog Hair in the Bed: When Fido Becomes the Boyfriend
Ever noticed how some women seem more attached to their furry companions than their human partners? That's exactly what we're diving into today – with both humor and psychological insight.The rise of "dog mom" culture represents more than just cute Instagram posts. For many women, dogs fulfill emotional needs that past relationships failed to satisfy: unconditional love without
13 - Cargo Shorts Won't Get You Dates
Looking sharp isn't just about vanity—it's a strategic move that impacts every area of your post-divorce life. In this revealing episode, we unpack why men's style matters more than most divorced dads realize, and how your appearance silently communicates volumes about your character before you say a word.When your self-worth takes a hit after divorce, upgrading your style provides
12 - Blowtorches, Ovens, and Smokers: Understanding Relationship Timing
What happens when Hollywood tries to depict modern dating? In this eye-opening episode, we dissect "The Materialist" movie starring Dakota Johnson, Pedro Pascal, and Chris Evans to reveal the gap between cinematic romance and the authentic relationship dynamics divorced dads navigate daily.The film portrays a matchmaker torn between a wealthy "unicorn" and her struggling actor
11 - Make Invitations, Not Demands: Redefining Leadership in Love
The world watched as Joe Jonas and Sophie Turner's divorce unfolded across international headlines, with Turner declaring she'd "never return to the US" and Jonas filing to keep his daughters stateside. But beneath this celebrity spectacle lies a powerful lesson for every divorced dad trying to navigate the complex world of dating and co-parenting.This episode dives deep into t
10 - The Man You Choose to Be Shapes Your Dating Future
Jude Sandvall and Dallas Bluth delve into the fundamental importance of identifying personal values and beliefs before re-entering the dating world after divorce. They explore how unexamined expectations can derail relationships and provide practical tools for building self-awareness.
9 - 5 Things To Look For In A Relationship
Whether you are contemplating dating or assessing the end of your marriage it is critical to know and understand that these 5 elements must be present in your relationship.
8 - 24 Dating Tips For Life After Divorce
You’re getting back out there and dating again after divorce! Listen in to learn 24 important tips for dating after your divorce including being patient with chemistry, identifying liars, and letting go of anger.
7 - How To Tell Your Child You’re Dating After Divorce
As you and your children adjust to life after divorce there may be one more adjustment that you want to make…dating again! Listen in as Jude shares some tips on how to tell your child that you’re dating again while reassuring them at the same time.
6 - 9 Critical Risk Management Questions For Dads Dating After Divorce
Listen in as Jude and Ralph share the 9 Critical Risk Management Questions For Dads Dads Dating After Divorce from Shawn T. Smith's book titled The Tactical Guide to Woman: How Men Can Manage Risk in Dating and MarriageDad Starting Over Website - http://DadStartingOver.comThe Divorced Dadvocate Website - http://TheDivorcedDadvocate.comMusic Credit: Akira The Don
5 - Are You a Tom Brady?
Ralph and Jude are joined by The Mad Men of Masculinity, Jason B. Kendrick and Kirk M. Samuels, to discuss the Tom Brady/Gisele Bundchen divorce and whether or not you are just like Tom Brady. Tune in to find out!Dad Starting Over Website - http://DadStartingOver.comThe Divorced Dadvocate Website - http://TheDivorcedDadvocate.comMad Men Radio - http://MadMenRadio.comMusic Credit: Akira The Don
4 - How To NOT F*%k Up Your Next Relationship
Ralph and Jude discuss Ralph's newest book titled Divorce Panic and share tips on how to prepare yourself for success in your next relationship.Dad Starting Over Website - http://DadStartingOver.comThe Divorced Dadvocate Website - http://TheDivorcedDadvocate.comMusic Credit: Akira The Don
3 - Masculine And Feminine Polarity With Anna Rova
Ralph and Jude talk with Femininity & Feminine Embodiment Coach Anna Rova about the masculine and feminine polarity and why it is important while dating and in a relationship.Dad Starting Over Website - http://DadStartingOver.comThe Divorced Dadvocate Website - http://TheDivorcedDadvocate.comMusic Credit: Akira The Don
2 - The Tactical Guide To Women With Dr. Shawn T. Smith
Dr. Shawn T. Smith joins the show to share wisdom from his book The Tactical Guide To Women: How Men Can Manage Risk In Dating And Marriage. Listen in as Shawn talks about risk management, the bright triad of women, and how to avoid completely f*ing up your life.Dad Starting Over Website - http://DadStartingOver.comThe Divorced Dadvocate Website - http://TheDivorcedDadvocate.comMusic Credit: Akira
1 - Why Divorced Dads Are A Catch!
Listen in as Ralph and Jude share about their respective histories in dating after divorce and explain why divorced dads are absolutely a catch in the dating market!Dad Starting Over Website - http://DadStartingOver.comThe Divorced Dadvocate Website - http://TheDivorcedDadvocate.comMusic Credit: Akira The Don
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