Healing Childhood Sexual Trauma
A podcast that explores healing from childhood sexual trauma, offering insights and support for survivors and those on a journey of recovery.
Episodes
I Hurt People While Healing–Here's How I Made Amends
In this episode, I talk about how I went about making amends with the people I mistreated during my season of healing.When I was actively healing my trauma, I had proclivities to get triggered very easily. When I'd get triggered, the people interacting with me would very quickly turn into my enemies. "I was the victim, they were being bad to me" was the persistent story.In this episode, I share ab
Should I Confront My Abuser? What I Considered
In the second set of memories I recovered, the perp was someone who was still alive. In my first set of memories, the perp was dead – I didn't fully realize it then, but it was a bit of a relief, since that removed the question of confronting him. That wasn't the case in the second set.In this video, I talk in great detail about all the actions I considered towards my perp. And how that chapter of
You Don't Need to Be Kidnapped, to Be Trafficked
In this next episode in my series of updates as my journey of healing childhood sexual trauma feels complete (in a manner of speaking), I talk about trafficking. In my own exploration of this theme, I came to realize that trafficking doesn’t always mean kidnapping. There are ways to traffick children ie. use them as sexual slaves to earn money, where you don’t need to take them away from their par
Moving Past the Urgency to Recover Every Detail of my Abuse
In this episode of "Healing Childhood Sexual Trauma"–which is the first in a series of episodes where I am intending to update the audience on this specific theme that I have kind of moved on from onto other (more fun!) themes like #sexualpleasure, Jesus and #exorcisms–I talk about the season of my healing journey where I was caught up in the question of who all did what to me when I was a child a
Texture of Panic Attacks
What is a panic attack really? It is a circumcision of the heart. Listen to understand how you can choose a different posture towards this fearful phenomenon and be freed of the panic that comes with it.Read the essay here: https://vighneshrege.substack.com/p/the-texture-of-panic-attacksI'd love to receive kind reflections on email: vighnesh1987@gmail.com
Divine Forgiveness – Closing the Chapter on my Vengeance Fantasies
This is the most honest thing I’ve shared about forgiveness.For a long time, I didn’t understand why killing was considered a sin. Not from the Buddha, not from Christian theology. After recovering memories of sodomy from my perpetrator in 2022, I felt deeply justified in wanting to kill him. I even researched how. I made soul agreements with parts of me that were in agony. I thought I was bringin
Exploring the Collapse of Boundaries in Abuse
In this video, I’m exploring some tender territory around the collapse of boundaries in abuse. I’m reflecting on how hatred from strangers online has been stirring up deep old pain — and how it might connect to early experiences of boundary collapse, possibly even repressed trauma. I share honestly about the emotional waves that came up, the grief, the moments of suicidal flashes, and the practice
Microdosing Psychedelics for Healing Childhood Sexual Trauma w/ Will Harris
(Skip to 0:00:45 for the start, apologies for the editing gaffe.)In this episode, Will Harris shares his journey of healing from childhood sexual abuse from his father using psychedelics.I met Will over a year ago here in Asheville and felt a resonance in our capacity to speak openly about our similar trauma history. In April of 2024, I did an Ayahuasca ceremony (my second one) with the intention
Exorcising childhood sexual abuse with Bob Falconer
I hosted Bob Falconer today on my podcast Healing Childhood Sexual Trauma.
I really loved the simplicity of a theme that emerged in this conversation.
It's that love heals everything.
You don't need all these fancy tools and fancy trauma healing techniques and fancy conversational frameworks.
You just need to open your heart to love.
Of course the journey to a soft heart sometimes req
Healing Indulgence in Vengeance Fantasies
This past weekend in Asheville was quite a grief portal for me, triggered by my first instance of being on the receiving end of verbal racism since I've moved here.
I trudged the now familiar road from shock, numbness to grief release to exhaustion, fatigue to suicidality to vengeance fantasization. In this video, I describe how allowing myself to fantasize about vengeance has helped relieve a lo
The Ridiculous Projection of Repressed Trauma into "Theories"
The wounding we don't see within ourselves, tends to get intellectualized and projected out onto the world. I dig into the story of Dr. Elizabeth Loftus, the top most expert on the "falsity" of recovered memories of sexual abuse. She was fondled at the age of 6 and believes that that incident "did not affect her much". She has devoted her career as a psychologist to create bodies of scientific res
Rage Against the Caretaker – A commentary on the movie Eileen (2023)
Often in the journey of an #adultsurvivor of #childhoodsexualabuse towards Wholeness, they have to face the Rage that lives within their bodies for the gross violation of boundaries that they experienced as a child. Rage is an emotion that exists to represent past violation of boundaries that have not been fully addressed and alchemized.It's a trope in the adult survivor world that often (not
Uncovering Trauma through a journey of Vipassana, Pick Up Artistry and Yoga – Interview with Wolf
Wolf is a fascinating human that I crossed paths with quite serendipitously through my travels. In this podcast interview recorded at Vondelpark in Amsterdam, NL, we dive into his uncovering of his childhood sexual trauma. Wolf is the first human I've directly spoken with who has experienced infantile sexual abuse. He is also one of the most open, creative and entrepreneurial human beings. I t
On overcoming trauma–induced porn & sex addiction with Tyson Adams
Tyson Adams is a trauma-informed IFS men's coach, somatic bodyworker and psychedelic facilitator. After spending 20 years addicted to pornography, he outgrew it seven years ago and has found his passion and purpose in helping other men master their lifeforce energy. He also co-facilitates men's work leadership intensives and works with couples experiencing intimacy challenges. When he'
On the Capacity of your Hands to Soothe your Panic Attacks
In the previous episode, I talked about the panic I've experienced every time I've come close to or recovered a repressed memory of sexual abuse. In this episode, I share more about my direct experience with soothing my own panic attacks by holding different parts of myself with loving kindness every morning, along with regular self body oil massage rituals.
I don't get panic attacks
The Panic of Recovering Repressed Memories of Sexual Abuse
The Panic of Recovery of #repressedmemoriesofchildhoodsexualabuse is rooted in the fallacious notion that what you are seeing is happening to you right now.Practice reminding yourself that anything you might see has already happened to you. Anything that you might be afraid of needing to do is a choice that you don’t have to make right now.I’ve found this reminder to self a wonderful way of soothi
Exploring the subjectivity & objectivity of repressed childhood sexual trauma
I share my journey of wondering whether it’s all real.
The Gradual Horror of Remembering that you've featured in Child Pornography
"I'd really like to dance with the stories of my childhood sexually traumas without being treated like I'm fragile. I want the disrespectful, shitty, bullying. I want people to say the things no one would EVER say. I want to find any other places I might have unresolved bits leftover. I think I'll make it a game where I give out points for whatever I want and that clues us all int
The Emasculation of Being Raped as a Boy
In this episode of the podcast, Liv Frank of https://www.mybodyprayer.com/ interviews me and explores my story of recovering repressed memories of childhood sexual abuse.
In this conversation, we touch upon the fascinating myth of Saturn, Uranus and Venus. Uranus was Saturn's father, the god of the unlimited Skies. Saturn was the God of limited space and time. Uranus was married to Gaia, the
Healthy boundaries, healthy parenting and the systemic nature of childhood sexual abuse with Clinical Sexologist and Shaman, Francesca Gentille
In this episode, I talk to Francesca Gentille, a clinical sexologist and shaman. We discuss her own history of childhood sexual trauma and get glimpses of her own wonderful story of parenting her kids, along with some interesting frameworks to understand sexual healing through – the 5 steps of healing, understanding how the notion of children as property underlies the widespread nature of sexual a
Boredom, suicidal ideation & repressed childhood sexual trauma
In this episode, I describe my own relationship to boredom and suicidal ideation and how the exploration of my repressed childhood sexual trauma has provided me with clarity into why I would constantly feel "bored" and engage in passive/mildly active suicidal ideation. I have not felt "bored" or experienced "suicidal ideation" over the past 6 months and I hope that th
Recovering repressed memories of childhood sexual abuse, and life thereafter
In this episode, I talk briefly about my journey recovering repressed memories of childhood sexual abuse and the unique challenges that it's brought to my life. If you also live with recovered repressed memories of childhood sexual abuse and would love to write to me about your story, I'd love to hear – vighnesh.rege@gmail.com
I was originally intending this to be a reel on IG @heal.child
Using artistic expression to overcome paternal sexual abuse – a conversation with Elizabeth McConaghy
A conversation with Elizabeth McConaghy, co-founder of OP(CO + CO)OP – a self-healing co-working community for sexual trauma survivors. We explore her story of surviving childhood sexual abuse by her father and her ongoing healing process. Elizabeth McConaghy is a writer, teacher, and artist who lives in Los Angeles.
Elizabeth's IG: https://www.instagram.com/ecmcconaghy/
Introduction to the podcast
This podcast intends to be a space to share stories of healing childhood sexual trauma.
Childhood sexual abuse is widely prevalent (1 in 3 women, 1 in 6 men) and simultaneously, hardly spoken about. The taboo associated with the subject allows this disease to persist within our society. Over the last year, I have spoken to and read stories of hundreds of adult survivors. Traumas can’t be compared
