Dumb-Dumbs & Dragons: A D&D Podcast
Dumb-Dumbs & Dragons is a comedy D&D podcast where improvisers new to roleplaying embark on adventures. Hosted by dungeon master Tom McGee, the show features regular players Tyler Hewitt, Laura Hamstra, and Ryan LaPlante, along with rotating guests. It has been featured on Spotify, ScreenRant, Lifehacker, and the official D&D podcast Dragon Talk. The podcast ranks in the top 10 comedy fiction podcasts globally and is #2 fiction podcast on Spotify in the USA.
Episodes
9.34 - A Frosty Welcome
It’s the morning of travel to Vaasa! Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) took Requiem on as co-spymaster of Assguard, Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) was thrilled to discover he didn’t have to hide his love of love on the road, and Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) had a sleepover with the potential groom to be! But will these heroes ever actually get together the wedding?! Also f
9.33 - Trashy Dumpton
Our heroes are facing their demons before the wedding! Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) realized his flight made the shirtless Reginald plan fall apart, Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) learned just how hard it is to talk with Kevin the Gauche, and Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) had a long very hard conversation with Ginny about the price of being a Prinx! Can these heroes pu
9.32 - He’s Hopeless
Our heroes are fast tracking the wedding preparation! Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) chose his outfits and colours, Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) learned he might have been pushing away love, and Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) learned that not all dancing will lead to pregnancy! But can our heroes shift the Quinny fans’ attention to Reginald before they leave for Vaasa?!
9.31 - Knock Knock Pause
Our heroes are determining who knows what about their current situation! Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) discussed his new engagement with his parents, Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) continued to play peacemaker with some success, and Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) broke down who he thought should be in the delegation! But what awaits these heroes in Vaasa?! Also featuring
9.30 - A Complicated Bundle of Twine
Our heroes are rushing to plan a wedding! Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) caught Ginny up on the whole situation, Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) made sure Quinny, Vinten and Ginny ended their discussion with a hug, and Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) started choosing delegation members with Mo Dirt! But can they all survive their trip to Vaasa?! Also featuring our awesome D
9.29 - Step-Warlock
Our heroes are heading to Vaasa! Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) left Quinny to speak to the stranger in his home, Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) invited Fallonmeyer Pinkblossom to go to the wedding with him, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) discovered agent Requiem and recruited him for the cause! But what will happen now that Ginny approached Vinten without Quinny ther
9.28 - You Know
Our heroes are planning a wedding! Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) ran Quinny and Vinten through obnoxious questions they could expect to receive, Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) started planning wedding announcements and a delegation, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) got his warlock powers back from Vinten’s great-great grandfather demon! But how will Ginny handle the ne
9.27 - Fugue Stake
Our heroes are faking an engagement! Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) had a turn being talked about like he wasn’t in the room, Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) exchanged information of national importance with Vinten, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) signed up for a fake but very public engagement to save Vinten from the Planteers! But can our heroes identify and stop the
9.26 - Not a Theocracy
Our heroes are trying to discover themselves! Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) realized he doesn’t know what Vinten Charlamagne is like in her home life, Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) learned there might be two Quinnys inside Quinny, and Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) got lost in the various metaphors for internal mental shenanigans! Can our heroes find a way to help Quinn
9.25 - 3 B***holes 2 Quinnys
Our heroes are fighting - emotionally! Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) revealed Vinten proposed to him, Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) was horrified to learn Quinny had been lying to him about his feelings for Vinten the whole time, and Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) tried to play peacemaker unsuccessfully! Can our heroes find a way to align themselves before war breaks ou
9.24 - Quinny Charlamagne
Our heroes are in quite the pickle! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) went to bed, Grandpa Warwick (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) made plans he can’t remember with his new best friend, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) has to choose between marrying Vinten and allying with Vaasa or losing her forever! Can our heroes find a way to maintain international peace and save Quinny’s rela
9.23 - Stinky Soup
Our heroes are trying to avoid a war! Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) was delighted to be reunited with Vinten Charlamagne for a brief moment, Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) travelled to Damara and learned of the threat of blood magic and the invasion of Vaasa, and Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) took the night off to find Grandpa Warwick a new best friend! Can these heroes
9.22 - Guess Who’s Coming to Damara
Our heroes are planning to kill a God! Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) negotiated with Bortle Chortle the Toril Explorer Tortle, Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) suggested Alyn bind the creature for all of their safety and she did, and Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) volunteered to find a way to break down Captain Planteer’s potions and body! But can our heroes trust Vinten C
9.21 - Pranks & Pan Flutes
Our heroes are about to inspect their broken portals! Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) sent Kevin away on errands to get a break, Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) hired a judge, an economist and questioned a Good Works Company contractor, and Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) tried to use the eye of true sight with his mouth. But are our heroes about to be blown up by booby-trap
9.20 - The Final Job
Our heroes are hiring new members of the royal council! Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) was furious when Butthole made Kevin his assistant, Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) provided a voice for the people of New Tombslab, and Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) hired himself a city planner. But are our heroes being distracted with busy work while the world burns down around them?
9.19 - We Need to Talk About Kevin
Our heroes are continuing their investigations! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) let the others take the lead interrogating a former Greywater mercenary, Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) confirmed Good Works Corporation employees were all over town, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) tried to pull Lexi out of prison unsuccessfully. But can our heroes find a way to stop the in
9.18 - Time of the Crime
Our heroes are desperate to learn more about these potions! Smart Reginald (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) led “Team Genius” in learning about the potions, Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) was concerned when Ginny adopted Smart Reginald’s accent, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) identified two merchants who might have key information. But can our heroes find the key to stopping the
9.17 - Team Genius
Our heroes have discovered a terrible conspiracy within Assguard! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) used zone of truth on the captive Fenris Borrachio, Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) became Gartok to aid in the questioning, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) led the team in their discovery of Planteer potions based on the prisoner’s confession. But what will happen now that
9.16 - Your Best Self
Our heroes are on their way to interrogate a prisoner! Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) sent Reginald to arrest Lexi in her disguise, Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) made a new friend at the market, and Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) received enough confidence from Farthole to leave her job as the Chief Justice. But what will happen now that Lexi’s potion wore off and she’s
9.15 - A Wizard Yelled At Me
Our heroes are planning missions and confessing their sins! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) was doing menial labor around town while Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) finalized his plans with Lexi before her staged arrest, and Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) went to confession only to find out all of his personqs needed to confess their sins. What can Farthole say to help the
9.14 - Confessions of Some Dangerous Minds
Our heroes continue to serve Assguard in their various roles! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) met with a noble who was more trouble than help, Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) spoke with his local agent Lexi who had big plans, and Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) avoided his confession while identifying several financial criminals. But what deadly threats will appear after thi
9.13 - Better than Everyone
Our heroes are in the midst of a string of meetings! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) was invited to dinner with the Queen of Damara, Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) exchanged terse words with an ambassador, and Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) was thrilled to see Quinny and Butthole working together to solve the Ginny/Prinx issue. But what dangers lurk in the meetings still o
9.12 - Ringadingdingdong
Our heroes have discovered an obnoxious threat inside Toriel Portals! Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) discovered the art inside the Old Campaigner wasn’t up to Mrs. Paisley’s standards, Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) discovered something was wrong with the portals, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) arrived in time to see Alyn and learn of the danger. What dastardly threat
9.11 - Portal Problems
Our heroes arrived back in Assguard victorious! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) turned his prisoner over to Reginald, Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) made sure his new mount was cared for, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) had a very uncomfortable conversation with his daughter. But what threat is more terrifying than a grumpy teenage girl? Also featuring our awesome DM To
9.10 - The Slap of Swords
Our heroes saved the caravan and captured their foe! Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) cured everyone of their various poisons, Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) struck down the escaping villain’s snake, and Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) carries out his first arrest as King. But what is going on with the newly empowered Ghost Skull Birgade? Also featuring our awesome DM Tom Mc
9.09 - You Suck
Our heroes are battling giant animals and a cannon man! Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) struck down a demonic coyote, Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) lost Saffron and discovered their foes are super powerful, and Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) was forced to start fighting as no one was willing to surrender. But what will happen now that the cannon man has popped back into e
9.08 - You’re Saving Us
Our heroes have slain the giant pigeon! Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) blended smites and the light of his moonbeam, Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) finished the beast with a perfectly placed arrow, and Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) convinced himself he was stronger than Tempus. But what will happen now that carts are exploding in the distance? Also featuring our awesome
9.07 - Pigeon Fight
Our heroes are racing towards combat! Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) befriended his new horse Hi-Ho, Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) discovered he’d been given a raptor to ride by Vinten Charlamagne, and Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) spent the entire ride meeting the new members of the Special Hammerers Intervention Team. Bait can these heroes survive battling a giant bir
9.06 - Welcome to the S***!
Our heroes have completed their first therapy session! Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) became Dr. Martok and ran the session, Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) was declared pretty well adjusted, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) discovered he not only couldn’t win therapy but that he has a lot of work to do on himself. What will happen now Krendan arrived and promptly died?
9.05 - Couples Therapy
Our heroes are on their way to therapy! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) sent Anyn on a hiring spree after getting suggestion from Cormium, Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) has to get ready for the arrival of his gang from Tombslab, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) discovered he was the heir to Baba Yaga. But before all that - what will happen in Butthole and Quinny’s first
9.04 - Bad Heir Day
Our heroes are making sure Ginny is alright before moving on to their other tasks! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) Quinny and his daughter off to talk, Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) received a potion that will let him shape change without wolfing out, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) successfully talked with his daughter about her relationship. But what message did Baba
9.03 - The Giggle-Pot
Our heroes are trying to make sure everyone is okay! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) got Ginny to open up about her recent breakup, Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) went looking for Quinny and instantly found him, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) was interrogated by his parents before finding his daughter. Can these heroes successfully cheer up the Prinx of Assguard? Also
9.02 - The Coolest Girl in the Kingdom
Our heroes have returned home discovering a month has passed while they were in a pocket dimension! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) prayed to himself and got caught up on things, Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) realized he could channel Martha via a seance to give therapy to others, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) was secretly devastated by the loss of his Warlock powers
9.01 - Since U Been Gone
Our heroes have a magic school but Quinny doesn’t have a patron! Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) helped convince the ghost of Phineas he had done good in the world, Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) used his divination powers and meteor swarm to destroy a djinn, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) discovered Captain Planteer killed Baba Yaga! Will the school be a success and c
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8.46 - No Djinn Deals (Season Finale)
Our heroes are about to restore Phineas Figplott! Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) convinced Horatio the only way he could find love was to be himself, Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) helped fart the giant turtle towards a date with his crush, Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) found the final Phineas shard! But can our heroes survive a battle with a ghost, a djinn, an evil cust
8.45 - TurtleQuest
Our heroes are helping a turtle find love! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) realized Phinease might be evil while interrogating Elphabian’s soul, Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) got the woodland elementals discharged on the way out, and Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) turned into Gartok to help coach the giant turtle they found! But can our heroes avoid being eaten by a Krak
8.44 - He Might Be Bad
Our heroes are searching underground for answers! Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) led the group through the Warring Wood before being ambushed by elementals, Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) discovered the creatures were happy to be defeated, and Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) found a hidden underground facility at Elphabian’s house! Will our heroes survive whatever awaits
8.43 - The Warring Wood
Our heroes are heading for the war woods! Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) freed Seamus Banks’s from being trapped in a spell, Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) led the group to the Pottery Barn on a side quest to find more of Phineas, and Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) found some going away cards that hinted at the past! But can these heroes survive their exploration of the
8.42 - The Pottery Barn
Our heroes are in tremendous danger inside a maze! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) wanted to conjure an anti-magic field but couldn’t until Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) convinced him he could snap prayer again if everyone farted, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) captured the souls fragment of Finnease before realizing he couldn’t re-enter the field! Can they get him i
8.41 - The Imagined Zoo
Our heroes have defeated the team sent by Scrolls+! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) was made huge and splattered enemies like bugs, Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) cut the villainous manager Jenny Sequa in half, and Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) had a rough time interrogating a captive but still managed to spare his life! But what the hell is actually going on at this sch
8.40 - Scrolls+
Our heroes are fighting inside the Twilight Tower! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) convinced the team to arm a mob of zombie helpers, Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) cast Sanctuary on Quinny before she and Butthole hid using banishment to spring an ambush, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) is running around the battle stealing people’s weapons! Can they survive this battl
8.39 - He’s a Real Bub
Our heroes are planning to retake the Twilight Tower! Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) discovered a time loop in the eternal graveyard, Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) spoke to Jace Kyro who was in it trying to save students, and Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) realized they were lost and had to talk Jace through that terrible realization! Now that the l professor and studen
8.38 - A Moment in Time
Our heroes are pursuing thieves into the eternal graveyard! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) protected the Pentexagon from a meteor swarm and blasted the bad guys, Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) discovered the eternal graveyard is full of practice zombies, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) led his friends safely from the shadows! But can these heroes find the S+ villains
8.37 - They Can Fly Now
Our heroes are hurrying through the Pentexagon! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) spoke with a memory of Cordelia Whey and found the past prism, Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) discovered she was researching breaking contracts and genies, and Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) found that Cordelia was making tools to try to prove herself wrong! Can our heroes get through the buil
8.36 - Pentexagon
Our heroes are headed for the Pentexagon! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) chatted with the ghost of Phineas Figplott, Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) collected more dolls of the various mascots for his daughter, and Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) discovered the strangers on campus are registered as Cryptflare students! Can our heroes find the past prism before the other Cr
8.35 - The New Custodian
Our heroes are headed for the Headmaster’s rooms! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) is becoming “more of an expert” at divining things, Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) studied the environment and discovered more people are here, and Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) made sure the party weren’t trapped in a time loop! But what will they uncover in the depths of the Great Hall?!
8.34 - More of an Expert
Our heroes are heading for the Great Hall! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) got himself a new crown and focused on divination, Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) chose a wand and was horrified as she studied necromancy, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) got sassy with Murray the Mimic as he chose to study Transmutation! But what dangers await these heroes once they get to the
8.33 - The Dorms
Our heroes have joined houses inside Figplott’s Academy! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) helped the group vibe through a maze, Juniper’s (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) powers ensured they weren’t killed by a cloud of daggers, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) discovered that Phineas’s welcome statue couldn’t handle existential questions! But can our heroes survive splitting the
8.32 - Orientation Day
Our heroes have arrived at the main campus of Figplott’s Academy! Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) cast blight for the first time to defend the group, Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) healed Motar the sentient staff/tree with her magic, and Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) got very confused about campuses, ghost ponies and cloches! But what dangers will our heroes face enterin
8.31 - Motar
Our heroes are traveling through the woods on a Figplott’s campus in another dimension! Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) discovered the identity of this campus’s headmaster, Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) talked to brooms but they didn’t help much, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) was determined to collect all the displacer beast dolls he could! But can they survive a ma
8.30 - Delilah World
Our heroes have been sucked into a painting! Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) found found Delilah the Displacer Beast, Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) pulled Ozzy the Owlbear out of a dead gelatinous cube, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) laid out the colors and dolls correctly in the study room - activating the table! But what will happen now that our heroes are being su
8.29 - Are You the Chef
Our heroes are investigating the wyrd room after making new friends! Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) determined the skeleton was the cause of the magical accident, Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) found a ruined ring on the dead wizard, and Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) found another monster doll and determined the ring matched a doll’s symbol! But how do these dolls link
8.28 - The Wyrd Room
Our heroes are meeting former staff members in and around Figplott’s magic school! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) hid the fact he was a king from the anti-king janitor, Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) made friends with a sheep and agreed to supply it with a tutor, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) convinced a boxing wizard to join the party! But can they survive combat w
8.27 - Magic Missile
Our heroes are still making their way to Figplott’s magic school! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) immediately trusted the random stranger they met in the woods, Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) made sure Arcturus didn’t set up camp in the middle of the stream, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) learned more about the conman and Mordrax Shadeleaf around the fire! But what wi
8.26 - Mordrax Shadeleaf
Our heroes are making their way to Figplott’s magic school! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) supervised the grounded until she was ready to talk, Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) admitted she didn’t like her job or title and needed an adventure to find herself, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) was their conman expert as they met with Arcturus Figplott! But what dangers wil
8.25 - A Polite Prison
Our heroes are late on their journey to Baldur’s Gate! Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) made Lexi an agent of Assguard to save her memories, Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) turned into Echo and refused to talk about what happened, and Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) grounded Echo until she brings Juniper back out! Will these heroes ever be able to head to Baldur’s Gate and s
8.24 - Songs in the Key of Treason
Our heroes are deciding the fate of Lexi the bard! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) spoke with Alyn and determined there is a magical mind-wipe but it can be undone, Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) got Mo Dirt to make a more permanent but riskier “mind smear” potion, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) made sure Bucky wouldn’t talk! But will Lexi choose the potion or the uns
8.23 - Potion, Spell or Quinny
Our heroes are in pursuit of Lexi the bard! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) got a break to throw hammers and write, Echo (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) finished regaling Lexi with every horrifying secret from their trip to Baldur’s Gate, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) instantly led the charge to find the bard once Juniper let slip about the song being created! Will our heroes
8.22 - You Told Her What?
Our heroes are having a series of meetings! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) met with Mo Dirt, Kevmoth Bellwinter, Captain Vismouth, Krendan and several new heroes, Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) inspired a plan to levy back taxes against the former nobles of Akkah, and Echo (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) horrified Lexi with tales of Baldur’s Gate! But will our heroes plans be eno
8.21 - Back Taxes
Our heroes are sorting things out in Assguard! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) got a bunch of small details resolved with Anyn, Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) turned into Echo to relay the tale of Baldur’s Gate to Lexi, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) made that Krendan’s Hall of Heroes would be useful for his spy empire! But what threat will these heroes face next?! Al
8.20 - I’M SORRY
Our heroes have returned to Assguard! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) convinced Cormium Planteer to sign on as the nation’s Minister of Communication, Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) began planning out the right way to phrase her Baldur’s Gate song, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) set off to meet Krendan about his Hall of Heroes! But is Assguard truly safe from the Ghos
8.19 - Minister of Communications
Our heroes are returning to Assguard after saving Daggerford! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) became friends and pen pals with King Melandrach, Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) had an argument with a mule, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) was cured of his zombie disease by Fallonmeyer Pinkblossom! But what has changed in Assguard while they’re away? Also featuring our awe
8.18 - Kings & Huts
Our heroes are waiting for Fallonmeyer Pinkblossom in the Misty Forest! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) won over the tavern keeper in Daggerford, Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) focused on getting medical help for her halfling friend’s zombie disease, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) was so loopy he ended up talking to a donkey! Can Fallonmeyer save Quinny or will he die
8.17 - No Birds, No Eggs
Our heroes barely survived combat but are now in charge of the lizardfolk! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) managed to defeat Redeye through intimidation and fart magic, Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) recovered from consciousness and was horrified to still be in an acid pool, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) has been inflicted with a zombie virus! Can these heroes surviv
8.16 - One Card Left to Play
Our heroes are now battling a zombified dragon and the lizardfolk! Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) is unconscious and dying in an acid pool, Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) is doing his best with his eldritch blasts, and Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) can’t seem to keep any of his concentration spells going. Will our heroes be able to beat Caustilancer AGAIN? Also featurin
8.15 - Divine Intervention
Our heroes are battling a dragon! Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) did massive damage before Fartbutt had to rescue her from an acid pool, Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) and his mirror images fought face-to-face with the dragon, and Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) was enveloped in an orb of darkness. Will our heroes be able to survive this battle with Caustilancer? Also fea
8.14 - The Vengeance of Caustilancer
Our heroes are battling a dragon! Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) lured the beast out of a ruined ship, Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) managed to maintain the ruse she was Vaultsy, and Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) arrived to battle being carried by Fartbutt the Couatl. But what will happen when combat truly begins? Also featuring our awesome DM Tom McGee (@mcgeetd).
8.13 - The Handsomest Snake
Our heroes are on their way to slay a dragon! Grandpa Warwick (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) realized he wasn’t the right person to deal with lizardfolk and became Juniper, Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) hid in the woods until he was sure he didn’t need to pop off, and Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) befriended the shady leader of the lizardfolk. But can these heroes survive a ba
8.12 - Redeye & Gator
Our heroes are on their way to meet the Lizardfolk! Grandpa Warwick (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) switched his spells around to defeat or befriend a dragon, Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) identified Glennis Orc-Slayer so they could get the supplies they needed, and Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) was shocked by people’s love for Captain Planteer. Can these heroes defeat a dragon
8.11 - Not That Vaultsy
Our heroes are on their way to change spells! Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) changed into Grandpa Warwick who now believes he’s names Vaultsy, Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) attempted to lead negotiations before he couldn’t get anyone’s names right, and Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) prepared to negotiate with the lizardfolk. But can these heroes find the allies they nee
8.10 - Grandpa Vaultsy Warwick
Our heroes are on their way to hunt a dragon! Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) addressed the travelling adventurers and narrowly avoided burning down the market, Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) was offering Pegasus rides before being sent on their quest, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) exchanged barbs with Fallonmeyer Pinkblossom. But can these heroes survive the hunt fo
8.09 - Me Who, They Do
Our heroes have taken bad voice potions and are going about their days! Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) had a very challenging negotiation with wrestling promoters, Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) is taking Will on a tour of Assguardian careers, and Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) visited Krendan and planned their shared address to the Hall of Heroes. What could possibly go
8.08 - The Hard Way
Cormium Planteer has been granted sanctuary! Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) was proud of his grotesque preparations, Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) managed to connect with Cormium despite being angry at his friends, and after the interrogation Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) turned into Echo to play Blood Games. What could possible happen next in Assguard? Find out next,
8.07 - Bad Question Lady & Mr. Small
Our heroes are bringing Butthole to see Cormium Planteer! Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) unknowingly turned his room into a magical Sanctuary, Juniper (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) had a break through with Cormium during their talk, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) used his potions and masks to hide everything charming about Cormium from Butthole. But what will happen when th
8.06 - A Song of Baldur’s Gate
Our heroes are struggling with the Cormium problem! King Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) visited Krendan who agreed to found the Ass Guard, Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) became Juniper and quickly lost patience with Cormium Planteer, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) bided his time waiting for Juniper to get even angrier. But what does Cormium really want to say to Butth
8.05 - Burnt Food from the Past
Our heroes are sorting out their various plans within Assguard! King Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) welcomed yet another hero to the nation before heading to see Krendan, Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) made a new friend to share his love of nature with, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) collected the tool he needed to disarm Cormium Planteer. But what Planteer based dang
8.04 - The Iron Zoid
Cormium Planteer has been imprisoned and strangers are arriving to help Assguard! King Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) was delighted to discover heroes from across the world were coming to the city, Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) wanted to be absolutely sure Cormium Planteer wouldn’t be mistreated, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) got Reginald to secure the prisoner. Who
8.03 - This is Not a Punishment
Cormium Planteer has taken sanctuary in Assguard! King Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) was equal parts worried and excited about falling for the handsome rogue, Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) is worried about the prisoner’s boredom while they determine if he’s a threat, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) couldn’t believe jailing someone is a big deal. Will Cormium turn out
8.02 - Sanctuary
Captain Planteer is back and up to no good! King Butthole (Ryan LaPlante, @theryanlaplante) is respectful of legal repercussions but the Butthammer wants to go to war, Gartok (Laura Hamstra, @lauraehamstra) found Cormium Planteer asking for sanctuary outside the city walls, and Quinny (Tyler Hewitt, @Tyler_Hewitt) consulted with Anyn about this new international threat. Can Assguard afford to help
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