Since You Asked with Lori Gottlieb and Gretchen Rubin
Each week, two friends—Gretchen Rubin, a happiness researcher, and Lori Gottlieb, a therapist—tackle the daily problems of living with all of you. They address pet peeves, embarrassing questions, and dilemmas, with special segments offering fresh approaches. Listeners are invited to weigh in and share their best advice. The podcast is for entertainment purposes only and not a substitute for professional advice.
Episodes
How Do You Help Your Adult Child Through Heartbreak? Plus: Our Goodbye Ritual
In our final episode, we share listener responses to questions about teen vaping, photos of exes, and what it means when an era ends. We respond to a parent whose 19-year-old son is going through a breakup and wants to support him without meddling. Plus: We take on rapid-fire questions about endings, hear what ordinary tasks Since You Askers secretly enjoy, and close with a listener-inspired goodb
Should You Pay Extra When Your Mom Is Flying In for Childcare? Plus: Advice You Ignored
We share a listener response about what to say when an estranged parent dies before there’s a chance to reconcile. We respond to a listener whose mother would fly in for childcare only if her daughter paid for an upgrade. Plus, Since You Askers weigh in: What’s the most helpful advice you ignored at the time?
Have a question or advice to share? Leave a voicemail or write to us at thesinceyouasked
Can You Support Two People Who Aren’t Talking to Each Other Without Taking Sides? Plus: We Have An Announcement!
We share listener responses to Dan Harris’s anxiety dilemma and a question about parents bragging about adult kids online. We respond to a listener who let her close friend’s adult son stay on her property and is trying to support him without getting pulled into his estrangement from his mother. Plus, Since You Askers weigh in: What rituals help you mark an ending or goodbye?
Have a question or a
Should You Delete Photos of an Ex for Your Partner? Plus: Getting Out of a Rut
We hear an update from the mother whose adult son was struggling with his difficult relationship with his father, and what changed after he talked it through with his dad. We respond to a listener whose boyfriend wants her to delete old photos with her ex if they get married. Plus, Since You Askers weigh in: Have you ever done something outside your comfort zone to get out of a rut?
Have a questi
How Do You Reset Your Life Without Starting Over? Plus: Which matters more at work: Money or Meaning?
We share listener responses on new baby boundaries and how to support friends dealing with family estrangement. We respond to a listener who wants a fresh start socially and professionally without making a major life change. Plus, Since You Askers weigh in: Do you need your work to feel meaningful or just financially support your life?
Have a question or advice to share? Leave a voicemail or writ
What Should You Do When You Catch Your Teen Vaping? Plus: The Best Surprises of Getting Older
We share more listener responses to the question of what to do with a secret a dying father is asking his daughter to keep. We respond to a parent who found their 16-year-old vaping and is trying to decide how to respond. Plus, Since You Askers weigh in: What surprised you about yourself after 30 or 40?
Have a question or advice to share? Leave a voicemail or write to us at thesinceyouaskedpodcas
How Much Should Parents Post About Their Adult Kids? Plus: Should You Pay for the Friends Trip If You Have More Money?
We respond to a listener who’s tired of parents posting about their adult kids on social media and wonders where the line is. We also hear from a listener who wants to pick up more of the tab on her friends’ annual trip, but doesn’t want it to change the dynamic. Plus, Since You Askers weigh in: What does someone in your life tend to misunderstand about you?
Have a question or advice to share? Le
How Do You Support a Friend Dealing with Family Estrangement? Plus: Dan Harris Wants Our Advice!
We respond to a listener who wants to support friends whose adult children are estranged; we share what can help and what to avoid. Since You Askers weigh in: Would people describe you as easy or difficult, and why? Plus, 10% Happier host and author Dan Harris asks how to handle claustrophobia and panic he feels on flights and in elevators.
Have a question or advice to share? Leave a voicemail or
Do Adult Children Need to Know About a Parent’s Affair? Plus: Is It Selfish Not to Share Food You Order With Significant Others?
We share listener responses to last season’s question about feeling less attracted to a partner after weight gain. We respond to a widow who discovered her late husband had an affair and is torn about whether to tell their adult children. Plus, Since You Askers weigh in: When you order food with family or friends, should you always share or is it okay to say no?
Have a question or advice to share
Should You Feel Offended If You Can’t Meet Your New Grandchild in Person? Plus: Quitting Without a Backup Plan
We’re so excited to be back with Season Three! We share updates and listener responses to the “work wife” question from last season. We respond to a new grandparent who feels hurt about being asked not to visit their newborn until after vaccinations, and how to support the parents without taking their rules personally. Plus, Since You Askers weigh in: Have you ever quit something without a backup
Is It Okay to Admit You’re Less Attracted to Your Partner? Plus: Carl Radke Wants our Advice!
We share updates from listeners on grief after losing a parent, the green bubble group chat dilemma, and the weight of family secrets. We respond to a listener who wants to talk to his partner about feeling less attracted after weight gain, and how to approach it with care. Since You Askers weigh in: What’s the most life changing advice you’ve ever received? Plus, we close out Season 2 with Summer
How Do You Set Money Boundaries with Family? Plus: Save It for Later or Use It Now?
We share updates from listeners on the husband who’s been meeting his ex-girlfriend for an annual coffee—and the bigger question of staying friends with an ex. We respond to a listener whose live-in mother-in-law’s spending is creating tension as their own child heads to college. Plus, Since You Askers weigh in: Are you a “save it for later” person or a “use the good stuff now” person?
Have a que
Is Your Partner’s ‘Work Wife’ Crossing Boundaries? Plus: Are You Becoming Your Parents?
We share updates from listeners on forgiving yourself after a social misstep, using AI during relationship conflict, and the surprising research behind the workplace candy dish dilemma. We respond to a listener who feels uneasy about her boyfriend’s “work wife,” and isn’t sure what boundaries to set. Plus, Since You Askers weigh in: Have you become more like your parents or less like them as you’v
Is It Always Wrong to Give In to Teen Peer Pressure? Plus: The Best Gift You Ever Gave
We share updates from the mother whose adult son is ready to pull back from his difficult relationship with his father. We also hear from a parent whose eighth grader is being left out of group chats because his Android texts show up as green bubbles — and she’s torn over whether buying him an iPhone sends the wrong message. Plus, Since You Askers weigh in: Is it better to give a practical gift so
Should You Keep a Dying Parent’s Secret? Plus: Making Peace With Yourself
We share updates from listeners on messy rooms, constant texting for reassurance, and how to handle a sensitive conversation about bad breath. We respond to a question about being asked to keep a family secret by a dying father, and what it means when that secret affects everyone left behind. Plus Since You Askers weigh in: What’s something you’ve made peace with that used to upset you?
Have a qu
How Do We Help People Grieve? Plus: When AI Starts Mediating Your Marriage
We both reflect on the experience of losing our fathers, and we share the advice that helped us during the early months and years–plus we discuss listeners’ insights and experiences. We also respond to a listener who is uneasy about her husband’s new habit of consulting ChatGPT during arguments. Plus Since You Askers weigh in: What is something you stopped doing that made your life better?
Have
Should Your Spouse Tell You If They’re Meeting Up with an Ex? Plus: Valentine’s Day Expectations
We share updates from listeners on donor conception, family secrets, and what it can look like to tell the truth with consideration. We respond to a question from a listener trying to decide whether her husband’s annual meet-up with his ex is normal–or a breach of trust. We also respond to a mother who feels pressure to create “magical” traditions for her kids, and worries she is overscheduling fa
Should You Cut Ties With a Parent? Plus: Chrissy Teigen Wants Friendship Advice
We respond to a mother’s question about whether her adult son should keep seeing his father when every visit turns into criticism. We also hear from a listener who apologized for a thoughtless comment, was not forgiven, and still feels stuck in shame two years later. Since You Askers weigh in: When is it justified to tell a lie? Plus, author and TV personality Chrissy Teigen asks how to be a bette
Is Your Partner Too Needy? Plus: Small Decisions That Changed Your Life
We share updates from listeners on the visiting-parents dilemma and where to draw the line when family comes to stay. We respond to questions about boundaries that leave people feeling rejected, including a boyfriend who wants constant texting for reassurance and parents who get upset when teens share information that the grandparents don’t want to hear. Plus Since You Askers weigh in: Have you ev
Should You Call Out an Awkward Problem? Plus: Did We Follow Our Own Advice?
We return for Season 2 with updates from listeners on gift-giving pressure, Botox honesty, and setting boundaries around family expectations. We respond to a question from a listener unsure whether to say something to a loved one about an uncomfortable issue involving a persistent smell. We also check in on whether we actually followed our own advice from last season about how to have a happier ho
Dear Therapists: Jason’s Alcoholic Father
Hi everyone, it’s Lori. Today we’re sharing another episode from my other podcast, Dear Therapists, where my fellow therapist Guy Winch and I do real sessions you can sit in on, offer practical interventions, and then hear how these interventions worked out after the session.
Today’s session is with Jason, who still carries emotional scars from his childhood. Now married and with children of his
Dear Therapists: Jennifer's Fiance's Instagram Flirtations
Hi everyone, it’s Lori. This week and next, we’re sharing my other podcast, Dear Therapists, where my fellow therapist Guy Winch and I do real sessions you can sit in on, offer practical interventions, and then hear how these suggestions worked out after the session.
Today’s session is with Jennifer, whose fiance exchanged romantic messages with an old girlfriend and Jennifer feels stuck about ho
What If Your Father Is Having a Baby With Someone Your Age? Plus: David Duchovny Gives US Advice!
We hear listener follow-ups about an overindulgent grandmother, a coworker’s communal candy dish, and a solution to a conversational one-upper. We also give advice to a listener struggling with her father having a baby with a partner close to her age, and another who wonders if she should say something when a friend’s Botox may be going too far. Since You Askers weigh in: Are high school reunions
What Happens When a Grandparent Won't Say No? Plus: Friends Who Are Difficult Diners
We share updates from listeners on setting family boundaries and lingering post-wedding blues. We respond to questions about a grandparent who gives the kids anything they want, and a friend trying to change her sports team’s schedule for her own convenience. Plus Since You Askers weigh in on proper restaurant etiquette: How do you handle a friend who’s a demanding diner?
Have a question or advic
Should Parents Stay at Your Place or a Hotel? Plus: Temptation in the Office
We hear updates from listeners about messy rooms, family gift-giving, post-wedding blues, and one-upping friends. We also respond to questions about whether visiting parents should stay in a hotel, and how to resist a sweet temptation at work. Plus Since You Askers weigh in: How important are your family’s holiday traditions?
Have a question or advice to share? Leave a voicemail or write to us at
How to Manage a Dramatic Family Member? Plus: Separating Twice & Staying Together With Mandy Patinkin & Kathryn Grody
We’re joined by actors and longtime partners Mandy Patinkin and Kathryn Grody to answer listener questions about how to handle a family member who creates drama at get-togethers and how to set boundaries with loved ones. They also open up about their long marriage—the two times they separated, how they found their way back, and the best (and worst) advice that came out of it.
Listen to Mandy and
How Do You Handle a Conversational One-Upper? Plus: Elizabeth Gilbert Has a Question!
We answer questions about a friend who can’t stop one-upping and the tensions around family gift-giving. We share follow-ups about family secrets and post-wedding blues, and bestselling author Elizabeth Gilbert asks, “How do we stop worrying when people we love make bad choices?” And Since-You-Askers weigh in: Do you enjoy getting texts from friends and family throughout the day—or find it annoyin
Why Am I Sad After My Wedding? Plus: The Holiday Season Debate
We tackle questions about “post-wedding depression” and annoyance with a teen’s messy room. We also hear updates from listeners—one who stumbled across a major family secret, and one who is breaking up with her hairstylist. Plus Since You Askers weigh in: Is the holiday season your favorite time of year, or not?
Have a question or advice to share? Leave a voicemail or write to us at thesinceyouas
Should You Reveal a Family Secret? Plus: How to Break Up With Your Hairdresser
We respond to a question about how to tell a 14-year-old the truth about being conceived through egg donation, and explore the ripple effects of family secrets. We also respond to a listener who’s unsure how to end a long relationship with her hairstylist, and why those breakups can feel so personal. And we hear your thoughts on our advice from episode 1. Plus, Since You Askers weigh in: When it c
Can a Marriage Survive When a Partner Won’t Change? Plus: Mel Robbins Wants Our Advice!
We follow up on last week’s advice about dealing with a flakey friend. We also respond to a question about cheating and its effect on a friend group, and debate whether a husband should finally accept a trait his wife says she will never change. Since You Askers weigh in: Has dishwasher technique become a “loaded” topic in your household? Plus, even celebrities need advice — bestselling author and
Is a Flakey Friend Worth Keeping? Plus: Badly Behaved Kids!
We follow up on last week’s advice about who should bear the burden of maintaining connections with parents. We also respond to questions about a group text that’s spiraling into harsh words; a friendship worn thin by years of last-minute cancellations; and a new mother who fears her husband isn’t bonding with their baby. Plus, Since You Askers weigh in: Would you tell a friend that their kids are
How Do You Stop Having the Same Fight Over and Over? Plus: Advice Gone Wrong!
In our very first episode of Since You Asked, we respond to a listener asking, “Should I make an effort to include my husband’s family in our plans, even if he doesn’t bother?” We also tackle a question about a couple who keeps having the same fights over and over. Since You Askers weigh in on the debate about whether to tell a friend if you think the person they're dating isn’t right for them. Pl
Introducing: Since You Asked — A New Kind of Advice Show
Who doesn’t need advice—and who doesn’t love giving it? Since you asked, we’re happy to answer. Each week two friends, Gretchen Rubin, bestselling author and happiness expert, and Lori Gottlieb, bestselling author and psychotherapist, team up to take on the everyday problems we all face. Whether it’s the pet peeve that’s annoyed you for years, the question you’re too embarrassed to ask, or the dil
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