
The Constant: A History of Getting Things Wrong
A podcast about exactly what it says it is: examining the bad ideas, mistakes and accidents that misshaped our world.
Episodes

Weights and Measures, Volume 2
In which, almost as an afterthought, we conclude the story of John Quincy Adams' boring book.
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Weights and Measures, Volume 1
How long is a podcast? Too.
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Woman in Pieces
The story of an oil baron's daughter, and his wife, who were the same person.
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Do You Think He Saur Us (Redux)
We've had some setbacks at The Constant HQ. So here's a remake of an episode I screwed up the first go around!
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You're Being Homunculus
Create your own magical little men at home with only these simple ingredients (cum, horse manure)!
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It's a Secret 5 Everyone
We're opening the secret feed vault and letting you take a peek. If you like what you find, consider joining at patreon.com/theconstant.
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The Valley of Death, Part Two
The bloody fight against Rocky Mountain Spotted Fever continues and concludes.
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The Valley of Death, Part One
Here's a change: a history of getting something RIGHT.
Eventually.
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When in Rome?
When is a jar not a jar?
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The Last Alchemist, Part Two
The rousing conclusion, now with verifiable events and personages!
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The Last Alchemist, Part One
To get to the last, we should start at the first. But since we have no idea who that might've been, we'll just start here.
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Perpetuum Mobile Redux
Let's try this one more time. Forever.
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Jumping Jack Flash (It's a Gas Gas Gas)
Time for some ol' fashioned mass hysteria.
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Peace Forever
It's only an analogy if you want it to be.
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Great Lakes Pirates, Part 3: Rebels
Of confederates and con-men.
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Great Lakes Pirates, Part 2: Shiver Me Timbers
Thar be wood.
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Great Lakes Pirates, Part 1: Pirate Bill
Arg, me mateys.
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The Christmas Bullet & It's Wonderful (Redux)
Two classic Constant Christmas episodes, remade in higher quality, and available ad-free for Patreon subscribers. That could be you!
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Santa's Secret Super Stories
Down through the chimney, click click click, it's three bonus stories from the Patreon secret feed!
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Paper Blankets
Dust in the wind. All we are is dust in the wind. Even more so: our stuff.
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A P Hill to Die on
All your base are belong to U.S.
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The Revenants
Let your imagination go wild.
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Tice and The Tornado
I can virtually guarantee that you've never heard this story before. As no one has, for at least the last century.
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How To Disappear Completely
(And Eventually Be Found)
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Tell Me Something I Don't Know (Volume 2)
More stories! More mea culpas! More NAPOLEON! This one's got it all.
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The Rest of The Story - Redux
We're hatching a plan to demolish The Great Wall of China... again!
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By Heart, Part 2
Do you remember where we left off?
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By Heart, Part 1
Here's one to remember.
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It's a Secret 4 Everyone
Huzzah! My idiotic naming conventions have finally born fruit!
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The Mysterious Stranger
The confusing con of Canada.
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Caraboo Who?
A mysterious princess appears!
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The Need for Speed (w/ Nicky Woolf)
Nicky Woolf can be my wing man anytime.
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Tell Me Something I Don't Know (Episode 200!)
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A Pirate's Life for Me
Clew up! Man the top sails! Other generic sailing jargon! There's a pirate utopia off the starboard bow!
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Madagascar (Redux)
The story of an island, and the worst thing that never happened on it.
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Holy Ship, Part 3
Has anyone found the ark? Noah way. (sorry)
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Holy Ship, Part 2
There are a lot of people who claim to have found people who claim to have found Noah's Ark.
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Holy Ship, Part One
I need two of every one of you to line up for this series.
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Out of The Blue
There's a thin line between "improbable" and "impossible".
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Love and Marriage
What a romantic sounding title. I bet this will be a sweet one.
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The Airship (Redux)
The misadventures of a steamfitting vice president who dreamed to dare.
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In The Meantime
It's about time we talk about time.
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It's About Time
Happy New Year, you buncha weirdos!
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Christmas Secrets
Who slipped that package under the tree?
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Amateur Hour
Is this thing on?
I had a nice, fluffy, inconsequential story to tell you this week. Instead, here's this.
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The Constant is part

It's Never Over
I had a nice, fluffy, inconsequential story to tell you this week. Instead, here's this.
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1876 (Redux)
This is the story of the worst American presidential election (so far (arguably)).
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The Ghost of Cock Lane
A ghost story, a murder mystery, a romance, a tragedy, a farce and a con job, all rolled into one. What could make for a better Halloween?
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The Ghost Ship
The great thing about a ghost ship is that you can blame the ocean for your pants being wet.
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Introducing: History Daily
On History Daily, we do history, daily.
Every weekday, host Lindsay Graham (American Scandal, American History Tellers) takes you back in time to explore a momentous event that happened ‘on this day’ in history. Whether it’s to remember the tragedy of December 7th, 1941, the day “that will live in infamy,” or to celebrate that 20th day in July, 1969, when mankind reached the moon, History Daily is

Venus in Transit, Part Three
Just one more story to go. Unless we're forgetting somebody...
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Venus in Transit, Part Two
Second verse same as the first. A little bit louder and a little bit worse.
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L

Venus in Transit, Part One
In 1761, the world joined together to complete the most difficult, ambitious, important scientific project in history. It... didn't go great.
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Crackpots
Some things are ordered and some are chaotic. This story is neither.
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Learn mo

It's a Secret 3 Everyone
We're opening up the vault and giving you access to three stories from our secret feed. If you like what you hear...
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A Cut Above
What's on the menu this week? Dick jokes and heresy, of course!
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Everyone Can Sing
Here's a special 4th of July episode designed to make everybody happy and not upset anyone at all in anyway.
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Listen Now: Legacy “J. Edgar Hoover”
From Wondery and Goalhanger Podcasts, Afua Hirsch and Peter Frankopan tell the
wild stories of some of the most extraordinary men and women ever to have lived –
and ask whether they have the rep they deserve.
Should Nina Simone’s role in the civil rights movement be more celebrated than it
is? When you find out what Picasso got up to in his studio, can you still admire his
art? Was Napoleon a hero

The Inconstant Moon
We're ending this pseudo-series on the golden age of hoaxes with the original mass media fake that started it all.
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Of Heroes and Hoaxes
Napoleon is dead, the cry went out. But he wasn't.
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Ducks, Half Sold
In the 18th century, something started happening to the news...
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Two Islands
Two classic Constant episodes, re-edited, re-recorded and re-produced. "People this Isle" and "Do Good, Carefully."
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Comfortably Numb, Part 3
Many men tried to claim the invention of anesthesia as their own. It didn't work out well for any of them.
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Comfortably Numb, Part 2
What does every wild west shootout in every movie you've ever seen have to do with the history of anesthesia? You'll find out in the cold open! Then, stick around for the rest.
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Comfortably Numb, Part 1
The war between humanity and its oldest, archest of enemies: pain.
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Like a Son
He was the most beautiful man in the history of Athens. And he nearly destroyed it.
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Whoa Baby
Until recently, our understanding of where babies came from was hazy. Which made it easy for a certain class of hucksters to make up crazy stuff about them.
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Let's Talk About Sex, Babies (Remix!)
We're remaking one of the all-time classic Constant episodes, this time with decent audio!
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The Holy She, Part 2
Did a woman secretly manage to become pope, only to be revealed by a badly mistimed labor in the streets of Rome? Probably not! But it's gonna be fun figuring it out for sure!
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The Holy She, Part 1
Did a cross-dressing woman manage to worm her way into the papacy, and was she discovered when she gave birth on the street? Lots of people believe and have believed in the Legend of Pope Joan. We're taking a two part dive into the history.
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Presenting: Historical Blindness
Find Historical Blindness at https://www.historicalblindness.com/ or wherever you listen to this podcast. We'll be back with a new year of new episodes in two weeks.
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A Very BMJ Christmas
They celebrate the season a little differently down at The British Medical Journal.
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99% Conspicuous
The James R. Thompson Center is the most hated building in the city of Chicago. And it has to be protected.
Check out Nathan Eddy's documentaries on The Thompson Center, Helmut Jahn, and more, here: https://vimeo.com/nathaneddy
Find Stewart Hicks' youtube channel, with great architectural content (much of it about The Thompson Center) here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCYAm24PkejQR2xMgJgn7xw

Rock Bottomless, Part 2
We can go deeper.
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Rock Bottomless, Part 1
This week, we're going deep. How deep? No one knows!
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The Werewolf
A beastly history of the beasts that stalked Europe for centuries.
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Psych Out, Pt 3: Repeat After Me
In which a psychic horse causes the greatest crisis in scientific history.
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Introducing: Southern Gothic
The Baynard Mausoleum is the oldest surviving structure on Hilton Head Island, but eerily, the family once interred inside is no longer there. Now, after a century of vandalism and treasure hunters has taken its toll, we attempt to explore the local lore that has sprung up to give this unique tomb a romantic origin story.
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Psych Out, Pt 2: Pick a Card
In which a talking, psychic horse gives JB Rhine the idea for a new field of science: parapsychology.
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The Constant is part

Psych Out, Pt 1: Lady Wonder
A horse is a horse, unless, of course, that horse can tell the future.
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The Constant is part of the Air
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