1001 Songs That Make You Want To Die
A podcast that explores terrible songs, from popular hits to platinum records, all of which are so bad they make listeners want to die. Each episode takes a humorous and critical look at why these songs are awful.
Episodes
50 Cent – P.I.M.P.: No Cadillacs, No Perms & Gav Gets Folded
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! This week, the boys take on P.I.M.P. by 50 Cent — a song that somehow turns sex trafficking, expensive shoes, summer chinchilla sales and refusing to hand over a dollar into one of the catchiest tracks of the 2000s.They break down the confusing pimp-or-John storyline, 50’s endless list of feuds, the weirdest lyric in th
Garth Brooks: Friends in Low Places, Enemies in High Places
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! This week, we take on Garth Brooks’ country mega-hit “Friends in Low Places”, a song that somehow became one of the most famous country anthems of all time despite sounding like a rodeo clown crashing your ex’s wedding and immediately regretting it.We break down the very confusing story at the centre of the song, Garth’
Bobby McFerrin - Don’t Worry, Be Happy: The Happiest Song About Being Sued By Your Landlord
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! This week on 1001 Songs That Make You Want To Die, we take on Bobby McFerrin’s painfully cheerful 1988 hit “Don’t Worry, Be Happy.”It’s the first a cappella song to hit number one on the Billboard Hot 100, a Grammy-winning cultural monster, and possibly the only song brave enough to tell someone with no bed, no money, n
The Most Suspicious Woman in Pop Music History? | Destiny's Child - Say My Name
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! This week, we're talking about one of the biggest songs of the 1990s.Destiny's Child's "Say My Name" topped charts around the world, won Grammys, and helped launch Beyoncé into superstardom.But after dissecting the lyrics, we're left with one question:Did this bloke actually do anything wro
Luke Bryan Made The Dumbest Country Song Ever
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! This week, we tackle Luke Bryan’s brand new country anthem Fish Hunt Golf Drink — a song so aggressively simple it feels scientifically engineered in a Nashville laboratory.Along the way, we discuss: Which bear could we survive fighting Why Luke Bryan treats touring like an annoying side quest between fishing trips “W
Billy Ray Cyrus – “Achy Breaky Heart” Is A Psychological Weapon
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! This week, the boys take on Billy Ray Cyrus’ 1992 mega-hit “Achy Breaky Heart” and uncover one of the most unhinged songs we’ve ever covered.There’s line dancing hysteria, exploding hearts, military conspiracy theories, Alvin & The Chipmunks, and possibly the first ever country music sleeper-agent activation.Plus: M
Craig David’s “Walking Away” Is The Ultimate Coward Anthem
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Craig David’s Walking Away sounds smooth, soulful and emotionally mature… until you actually listen to the lyrics and realise this bloke is just sprinting away from every problem in his life.This week the boys unpack one of the biggest songs of 2000, including Craig David’s legendary facial hair, whether “powder room” j
BTS – noRMAL (This Song Makes No Sense)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! This week, we take on Normal by BTS… a 2026 release with 7 members, 10 songwriters, and somehow still not a lot going on.We break down the lyrics, the production, and the strange mix of “deep” messaging and absolute nonsense. From kerosene references to “knees ease,” this one gives us plenty to work with.We also dive in
Backstreet Boys – As Long As You Love Me (This Is Actually Creepy)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! This week, we’re joined by comedian Aaron Gocs to break down As Long as You Love Me by Backstreet Boys.What starts as a harmless 90s pop hit quickly turns into a deep dive into fugitives, war crimes, Ponzi schemes and one of the darkest lyrical breakdowns we’ve ever done.We cover:• Could Aaron Gocs beat all five Backstr
Kesha – Your Love Is My Drug (This Is Completely Unhinged)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! This week, we break down Your Love Is My Drug by Kesha — a song that somehow became a global hit despite sounding like a full-blown spiral.We unpack lyrics that jump between love, addiction, and absolute chaos, including one of the most ridiculous lines we’ve covered on the show.Also in this episode: Worst lyric: “loves
Rock Wit U (Awww Baby) (This Song Is Too Smooth… Something’s Off)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! This week, we take on Rock Wit U (Awww Baby) by Ashanti — a song that somehow climbed to #2 on the Billboard charts despite having absolutely nothing going on.We break down the lyrics, which start as standard early 2000s R&B and quickly spiral into something way more sinister than intended. There’s also a deep dive
Walkin’ on the Sun – The Smash Mouth Song That Aged Horribly
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! This week on 1001 Songs That Make You Want To Die, the boys take on “Walkin’ on the Sun” by Smash Mouth — a track that sounds like a breezy summer anthem until you actually listen to what it’s saying.From the jump, things spiral. What starts as a laid-back, organ-driven groove quickly turns into a lyrical mess of hippie
Kung Fu Fighting – This Song Makes No Sense
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Everybody was kung fu fighting… apparently.This week on 1001 Songs That Make You Want To Die, we break down the 1974 global hit Kung Fu Fighting by Carl Douglas — a song that somehow took over the world after being thrown together in about ten minutes.We get into: How this became one of the best-selling singles of all t
Y.M.C.A. – The Dark Truth Behind The Village People Hit
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Everyone knows the YMCA. Few people have actually thought about it.This week on 1001 Songs That Make You Want To Die, we dive into one of the most recognisable songs ever written — and unpack what’s really going on beneath the disco surface.We get into the story behind Village People, how the song came together, and why
Disco Duck – The Worst #1 Song Ever?
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! This week, we take on Disco Duck — a song that proves the 70s were a lawless time.It’s disco. It’s a duck. It’s somehow a number one hit.We unpack how this even got made, why it blew up, and whether anyone involved should’ve been stopped.Also: A brand new segment — Defend This Song or Die — launches in the worst possibl
It’s Raining Men – This Shouldn’t Work… But It Does
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Disco month is here… and we’re starting with chaos.This week we’re breaking down “It’s Raining Men” by The Weather Girls — a song that sounds like pure joy, but quickly turns into one of the most unhinged scenarios we’ve ever tried to make sense of.Because when you actually think about it… This isn’t a vibe. It’s a full
Bruno Mars – Why This Song Feels Off
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! This week on 1001 Songs That Make You Want To Die, the boys dive into “I Just Might” by Bruno Mars — a track that somehow flies under the radar while still managing to spark strong opinions.We break down the lyrics line by line, unpack the story and background behind the song, and dig into the production choices that sh
Sombr – back to friends (Why This One Hit So Hard)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! In this episode of 1001 Songs That Make You Want To Die, the boys take on “Back To Friends” by Sombr — a song about that painfully awkward stage after a breakup where everyone pretends things are “fine”… but absolutely nothing is fine.What starts as a discussion about the song quickly spirals into a brutally honest look
Frank Ocean – Pink Matter (What Is This Song Even About?)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! In this episode of 1001 Songs That Make You Want To Die, the boys dive headfirst into “Pink Matter” by Frank Ocean — a slow, dreamy track that somehow spirals into one of the strangest conversations we’ve ever had on the show.What starts as a breakdown of the song quickly turns into chaos: questionable philosophy, uncom
Tones and I – Fly Away (Why People Are Split On This)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! This week on 1001 Songs That Make You Want To Die, we take off with “Fly Away” by Tones and I.After busking her way up the East Coast and dropping one of the biggest songs in the world, Toni Watson followed it up with this glossy, motivational, “believe in yourself” anthem. It’s big. It’s theatrical. It’s inspirational.
Dean Lewis – Be Alright (Why This Song Hits Everyone)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! This week on 1001 Songs That Make You Want To Die, we dive headfirst into “Be Alright” by Dean Lewis — the heartbreak anthem that somehow became one of the most-streamed Australian songs of the 2010s.On the surface, it’s a breakup ballad about betrayal, moving on, and your mate telling you to put the phone away. But whe
Meghan Trainor – This Song Is More Annoying Than You Remember
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! This week on 1001 Songs That Make You Want To Die, we take aim at Lips Are Movin by Megan Trainor — a song that somehow convinced the world it was quirky, empowering, and not just the same chorus shouted at us for three straight minutes.We break down how this track rode the post-All About That Bass wave, why the lyrics
RAYE – WHERE IS MY HUSBAND! (This Blew Us Away)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! In this episode of 1001 Songs That Make You Want To Die, we take on WHERE IS MY HUSBAND by RAYE — a song that somehow manages to be chaotic, catchy, and deeply unhinged all at once. We unpack the vocal acrobatics, the theatre-kid energy, and the lyrical panic of a woman sprinting through emotional traffic with zero plan
YUNGBLUD – Zombie (This One Gets Dark Fast)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! This week on 1001 Songs That Make You Want To Die, we take on “Zombie” by YUNGBLUD — a song that wants very badly to be important, emotional, and generation-defining… and somehow ends up sounding like a Hot Topic TED Talk.We dig into the song’s trauma-core lyrics, its earnest but exhausting messaging, and the strange sp
The Weeknd – The Hills (This Song Is Way Darker Than You Think)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! This week on 1001 Songs That Make You Want To Die, we head straight into the fog with The Hills by The Weeknd.A song that sounds like fame, paranoia, sex, and self-loathing all yelling over each other through blown speakers. It’s moody. It’s aggressive. It’s been blasted in cars at dangerous volumes since 2015.Joining u
Cool Kids – The Song Everyone Pretended To Like
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! This week on 1001 Songs That Make You Want To Die, we put Cool Kids by Echosmith on trial.A song that was absolutely unavoidable in the 2010s. Radio loved it. Ads loved it. Everyone else slowly lost their mind.We break down the lyrics, the suspiciously manufactured vibe, the “are they saying cool kids or cookies?” theor
David Bowie – Heroes (Is This Song Overrated?)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! This week on 1001 Songs That Make You Want To Die, we take on “Heroes” — a song that somehow manages to be genuinely beautiful, historically important, and still capable of making us argue for way too long.We dig into David Bowie in his Berlin era, the real story behind the kiss by the Wall, why this song sounds enormou
Avril Lavigne – Complicated (This Song Defined A Generation)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! This week on 1001 Songs That Make You Want To Die, we put “Complicated” under the microscope and ask the question nobody wanted answered in 2002: was this actually pop punk, or were we all aggressively gaslit by a necktie and some eyeliner?We dig into how Avril Lavigne was pitched as a skater-punk outsider while quietly
John Mayer – Your Body Is a Wonderland (This Is So Much Weirder Now)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! John Mayer’s “Your Body Is a Wonderland” should be a sweet little love song… but somehow it ends up sounding like a guided tour through a serial killer’s scrapbook. In this episode, we break down the lyrics, the deep-sea blanket metaphors, the miles of skin, the hand-only approach to intimacy, and the unbelievably curse
Spotify Wrapped 2025: The Songs We Actually Loved This Year
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! For once, we’re not here to ruin anything.This Spotify Wrapped 2025 episode of 1001 Songs That Make You Want To Die flips the script. We’re diving into the songs we genuinely loved this year. The tracks we played to death, defended to the end, and didn’t skip even once.Each host runs through their Wrapped, explains why
I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus - The Jackson 5
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! “I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus – The Jackson 5”Christmas is meant to be wholesome… until you look at the lyrics too closely. This week, the boys dig into I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus by The Jackson 5 — a song that somehow manages to be festive, creepy, and deeply unhinged all at once.Was Mum having an affair with S
Doctor Jones - Aqua
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! This week we dive head-first into the late-90s bubblegum fever dream that is “Doctor Jones” by Aqua. We break down the jungle-camp video, the chaotic lyrics, and why Aqua seemed determined to make every song sound like it was recorded inside a bouncy castle.From the Indiana Jones knock-off storyline to the hyperactive E
Beez in the Trap - 2 Chainz and Nicki Minaj
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! This week the boys dive into “Beez in the Trap” by Nicki Minaj and 2 Chainz — a track that somehow manages to be about money, slang, drug spots, and absolutely zero bees. And yet we spend half the episode talking about bees anyway.Chibs tries to decode the meaning of “I bees in the trap,” Gav has a full meltdown about t
I’m on Fire - Bruce Springsteen
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Bruce Springsteen might be The Boss, but in I'm on Fire he's also… extremely calm about being absolutely covered in metaphorical (or maybe real?) flames.This week, we dive deep into one of the most quietly horny and confusing songs ever written. Is Bruce seducing someone? Is he literally combusting? Did he jus
Paint The Town Red – Doja Cat (Internet Controversy Explained)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Doja Cat went full devil mode for “Paint The Town Red,” so we thought we’d dive straight into the chaos and see what the hell is going on. The crew tries to make sense of devil references, kidney-level anatomy, and why she’s only letting us watch her eat exactly ten more times. We also pitch a new T-shirt slogan, debate
I Believe I Can Fly – R. Kelly (Can You Separate the Song?)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! In this episode of 1001 Songs That Make You Want To Die, the boys take flight—literally and metaphorically—as they dive headfirst into R. Kelly’s delusional gospel-ballad-turned-Olympic-theme, “I Believe I Can Fly.”From Space Jam nostalgia to the harsh reality of sex crimes, Chibbs, Bevo, and Dan Southern unravel the bi
We Want Your Questions! (1001 Songs Q&A Callout)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Hey team — it’s Bevo here (yep, that Bevo). We’re cooking up a Q&A episode, and we want you to be part of it. Ask us anything: Why do they call him Mad Dog? Which songs have we rated the worst so far? Did Chibbs ever pay Dan that eight grand? (You already know the answer.)Send your questions to https://www.1001songs
Wood - Taylor Swift
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Taylor Swift’s new song “Wood” has arrived — and the boys are asking the big questions: Is it about love? Superstition? Or… Travis Kelce’s actual wood? 🌲😳Join Chibbs, Bevo, Gav, and Mad Dog as they unpack every ridiculous lyric, dissect the erection metaphors, and debate whether Taylor’s officially gone full Katy Perry.
It Must Have Been Love - Roxette
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Was It Must Have Been Love by Roxette really a heartbreaking ballad… or the world’s most elegant song about farts? 💨In this episode of 1001 Songs That Make You Want To Die, the boys dive into Roxette’s biggest hit, famous from Pretty Woman. We uncover:The lost Christmas version of the song 🎄Why it might secretly be abou
Let Her Cry - Hootie & the Blowfish
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Let Her Cry was one of the biggest hits of the 90s — but does it actually hold up, or is it just a sloppy, tear-soaked mess? In this episode, we rip into Hootie & the Blowfish’s overblown ballad, from the melodramatic lyrics to the vocal delivery that made Darius Rucker a household name.Is this song a heartfelt clas
Ordinary - Alex Warren
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Alex Warren tried to pour his heart into Ordinary — but did he just give us a beige anthem for the TikTok era instead? We pull apart the lyrics, the delivery, and the over-produced vibe to see why this song feels less “relatable” and more… painfully average.Join us as we debate whether Ordinary is a harmless pop track o
O.P.P - Naughty By Nature
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Naughty By Nature’s O.P.P was a 90s hip hop anthem — catchy, controversial, and confusing as hell. But what does O.P.P even mean, and does the song actually hold up? In this episode of 1001 Songs That Make You Want To Die, we break down the lyrics, the innuendo, and why this track had parents panicking while kids sang a
Mr Tambourine Man – Bob Dylan (Genius or Overrated?)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Bob Dylan’s Mr. Tambourine Man is called a masterpiece of folk music — but does it really deserve the hype? In this episode of 1001 Songs That Make You Want To Die, we tear apart the lyrics, debate the meaning, and ask if Dylan was a genius poet or just mumbling nonsense with a guitar.Expect comedy, hot takes, and a lot
Golden - HUNTR/X
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Golden – Huntr/xScore: 7.4Huntr/x’s Golden arrives like a motivational poster you’d find hanging in a gym bathroom, but set to a synth line that sounds vaguely like it was borrowed from a video game character’s redemption arc. It’s a song that insists on optimism with the ferocity of a Labrador that’s just discovered a
Cry For You – September (Ultimate Club Throwback)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Cry for You – SeptemberScore: 8.1In 2006, Petra Marklund, better known by her Europop nom de guerre September, released Cry for You, a track that felt less like a song and more like a government-mandated vaccination against sadness. Somewhere between a breakup anthem and an IKEA flat-pack instruction manual for melancho
Check Out Moose On The Loose
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! We want to give a shout-out to a brand new podcast from a friend of the show: Moose On The Loose.If you love the unfiltered chaos of 1001 Songs That Make You Want To Die, you’ll want to add this to your list. It’s funny, it’s wild, and it’s worth your time.👉 Search Moose On The Loose wherever you get your podcasts and h
One Too Many - Keith Urban and Pink
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Keith Urban & Pink – One Too ManyScore: 3.4It takes a certain kind of courage to title your duet One Too Many when the song itself sounds like it was written after exactly that number of beers. Keith Urban and Pink, two pop-country-adjacent titans, come together here not so much in harmony as in a musical custody ba
Manchild - Sabrina Carpenter
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Sabrina Carpenter — “Manchild” Pitchfork Score: 5.8On “Manchild,” Sabrina Carpenter trades in her usual sugary pop flair for what feels like a subtweet set to music. The song drips with sarcasm, which is fitting, because it sounds like it was written directly after seeing an ex-boyfriend post a thirst trap captioned “ri
Beautiful Things – Benson Boone (Why This Song Blew Up)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Benson Boone — “Beautiful Things” Pitchfork Score: 6.4Benson Boone’s “Beautiful Things” is the kind of song that sounds like it was carefully engineered to play during the end credits of a Netflix teen drama—specifically the episode where the main character finally kisses their crush, only for it to start raining in cin
Waking Up In Vegas - Katy Perry
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Pitchfork Review – Katy Perry: Waking Up in Vegas Score: 7.9 (Best New Hangover)If Hunter S. Thompson had written Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas as a sugar-coated rom-com, Waking Up in Vegas would be the soundtrack. Katy Perry delivers a glitter-fuelled ode to bad decisions, late-stage capitalism, and the kind of hangov
Shaddap You Face - Joe Dolce
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Pitchfork Review – Joe Dolce: Shaddap You Face Score: 8.7 (Best New Meme)Joe Dolce’s Shaddap You Face is the kind of song that makes you question not only the nature of music, but the nature of civilisation itself. In 1980, while the rest of the world was contemplating the looming nuclear winter, Joe Dolce decided to we
Shut Up! - Simple Plan
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Simple Plan – “Shut Up!” Lava Records; 2004 2.1/10If teen angst were a currency, Simple Plan would be Canada’s largest export. And “Shut Up!” is perhaps their most shrill, sugar-coated contribution to the pop-punk economy: a three-minute tantrum in skinny jeans, flung onto CD like a Hot Topic receipt someone refused to
Shut Up - Black Eyed Peas
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Black Eyed Peas – “Shut Up” Interscope; 2003 1.4/10There’s a moment—roughly 43 seconds into “Shut Up”—when the listener is already wondering what unspeakable acts they committed in a past life to deserve this. This is not so much a song as it is a group therapy session that accidentally got auto-tuned, given a reggaeton
Shut Up and Let Me Go - The Ting Tings (Replay)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! 🚨 It’s Shut Up Month on the podcast! 🚨All August, we’re reviewing songs with “Shut Up” in the title — the loud, the weird, and the unintentionally hilarious. From Rihanna’s speeding metaphors to Reece Mastin’s shouty romance, nothing is safe.New episodes every week on 1001 Songs That Make You Want To Die. Turn it up… th
Shut Up & Kiss Me - Reece Mastin
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! 🎙️ Shut Up Month Continues on 1001 Songs That Make You Want To Die 🎙️ All month long, we're celebrating songs that open with attitude and close with confusion — all united by one shared desire: that someone, somewhere, would just shut up. This week, we swerve into the spray-tanned heart of Australian Idol aftermath
Shut Up and Dance - WALK THE MOON (Replay)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! 🚨 It’s Shut Up Month on the podcast! 🚨All August we’re reviewing songs with “Shut Up” in the title — the loud, the weird, and the unintentionally hilarious. From Rihanna’s speeding metaphors to Reece Mastin’s shouty romance, nothing is safe.New episodes every week on 1001 Songs That Make You Want To Die. Turn it up… the
Shut Up and Drive – Rihanna (Underrated Rihanna Era)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! 🎙️ Welcome to “Shut Up Month” on 1001 Songs That Make You Want To Die 🎙️ This July, we’re diving headfirst into songs that told the world to pipe down — whether they meant it romantically, rebelliously, or just didn’t feel like having a conversation. Each episode, we dissect a song with “Shut Up” in the title, peeling b
Shower - Becky G
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Becky G: "Shower" ★☆☆☆☆ By Someone Who’s Been Held Hostage in a Sephora for 36 HoursThere are songs that change lives. There are songs that move culture. And then there is “Shower” by Becky G—a song that boldly asks, what if brushing your teeth could be a personality?Let’s be clear: “Shower” isn’t so much a po
Watch Me (Whip / Nae Nae) - Silentó
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Silentó – “Watch Me (Whip / Nae Nae)” TurnUp Records / Capitol – 2015 1.6By the time Silentó commands us to “watch me whip,” a full seven seconds into the track, you already know you’ve boarded a train bound for post-ironic oblivion. What follows is not so much a song as it is an unrelenting instructional video, powered
Papa Don’t Preach – Kelly Osbourne (Why Does This Exist?)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Kelly Osbourne: “Papa Don’t Preach” Epic Records, 2002 Pitchfork Rating: 3.7In a move that can only be described as “aggressively Y2K,” Kelly Osbourne—daughter of Ozzy, wearer of neon hair, and survivor of MTV’s The Osbournes—emerged from the reality-TV fog of war to drop her cover of Madonna’s “Papa Don’t Preach.” A bo
Unwell - Matchbox Twenty
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Matchbox Twenty – "Unwell" Atlantic; 2003 3.2By: Dax Mumberson, Pitchfork ContributorThere are songs that define an era, and then there’s “Unwell” by Matchbox Twenty—a song that limply gestured at defining something before retreating back into a GAP sweater of its own design. Released in 2003, but spiritually
I Touch Myself - Divinyls
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Divinyls – “I Touch Myself” (1990) ★ ★ ★ ★ ☆ Genre: Sexy Pop-Rock with a Side of Subtle ShoutingIf you’ve ever wanted to tell the entire world you’re into yourself—like, really into yourself—but with an Aussie accent and a jangly guitar riff behind you, "I Touch Myself" is your anthem.Released in 1990, this so
Ridin’ – Chamillionaire (They See Me… Still Ridin’)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Chamillionaire – “Ridin’” [feat. Krayzie Bone] Universal; 2006 6.4 (but only if you're in a Dodge Charger with illegal tints)“Ridin’” is the rare kind of song that makes you feel both like a criminal and a misunderstood philosopher—if your philosophy thesis is mostly about how the cops are always watching, especial
In The Ayer – Flo Rida (Club Era Throwback)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Flo Rida – “In the Ayer” [feat. will.i.am] Atlantic; 2008 2.1If you’ve ever stared into a lava lamp and thought, “What if this could somehow be a song?”—well, congrats, your dream was made flesh in In the Ayer, the auditory equivalent of bedazzled cargo shorts and Axe body spray. Flo Rida, not known for subtlety or, say
That’s My Kind of Night – Luke Bryan (Country Gone Wrong)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Luke Bryan – “That’s My Kind of Night” ⭐️ 1.9 / 10 Label: Cliché Hat Records, a Division of Bud Light SoundsIf a monster truck rally had sex with a Bass Pro Shops flyer during an Axe Body Spray commercial, the baby would be “That’s My Kind of Night.” And that baby would grow up to wear cargo shorts year-round and call e
Fergalicious – Fergie (This Makes No Sense… Still Slaps)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Fergie – “Fergalicious” ⭐️ 2.1 / 10 Label: A Delicious Flop Pastry RecordsAh yes, “Fergalicious” – the 2006 cultural artifact that dared to ask: what if a spelling bee had a sugar crash during a rave at Claire’s Accessories?Fergie, freshly emancipated from the Black Eyed Peas’ deeply important catalog of "My Humps&
Me Myself & I – Scandal’us (Forgotten Aussie Pop Hit)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Scandal’us – Me, Myself & I (2001) ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ (Pitchfork, 10.0)In an era bloated with faux-indie self-seriousness and turn-of-the-millennium testosterone-pop, Me, Myself & I arrived like a rhinestoned meteor, obliterating subtlety and redefining post-reality-TV sonic maximalism. What begins as a breakup anthem q
Apple – Charli XCX (Hyperpop Brain Melt)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Oh, of course Charli XCX is definitely just recycling that ultra-sophisticated, high-brow techno pop from the early 2000s—you know, the era of iconic lyrical masterpieces like "My Humps" and "Blue (Da Ba Dee)." She's just sitting in her neon-lit studio, sipping Surge, thinking, "What the wo
Squidward Nose – CupcakKe (Completely Unhinged Episode)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Squidward is a grumpy, artistic octopus from SpongeBob SquarePants, known for his long, droopy nose that often reflects his mood and expressions. His nose is frequently the punchline of jokes—getting caught in doors, inflated, or mistaken for other objects—making it a running gag in the series. It symbolizes his exagger
Miracles – ICP (Magnets… How Do They Work?)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! No, "Miracles" by Insane Clown Posse (ICP) is not intended as a joke. Despite its viral reception and widespread mockery—particularly the line "Fucking magnets, how do they work?"—the song was created with sincerity. ICP aimed to express genuine wonder at everyday phenomena that are often overlooked.
Short People – Randy Newman (How Did This Get Released?)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! *“Short People” by Randy Newman is a snarky, satirical jab masquerading as a pop song, delivering a wildly exaggerated roast of vertically-challenged folks with lines so ludicrous they border on cartoon villainy. With its bouncing piano and upbeat melody, the song mocks short people for everything from their “little han
Gettin’ Jiggy Wit It – Will Smith (Still a Banger?)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! In this unsettling reimagining, the smooth-talking, swagger-filled narrator isn’t here to party… he’s luring kids with charm, games, and magic tricks under the guise of fun. He struts through neighborhoods with a twisted grin, tossing candy, whispering riddles, and leading children astray with hypnotic dance moves. Dres
Rock and Roll All Nite – KISS (Most Basic Rock Hit Ever?)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! I wanna nap and rock all night! (And shuffle every day!) I wanna nap and rock all night! (Then golf and Matlock play!)Think you know music?Every Friday, Tower Of Music puts your music knowledge to the test.Guess the artists. Spot the clues. Beat the hosts.Play along and see if you can make it to the top of the tower.New
When You Say Nothing At All - Ronan Keating
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Imagine you are inside a sentient music store, where time doesn’t move forward but instead loops in soft-focus montages of bittersweet almost-memories. Ronan Keating, a man who simultaneously exists inside and outside the concept of love, strolls through this liminal space, not searching for something, but also kind of
That’s So True - Gracie Abrams
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Imagine you’re standing in a hallway that exists outside of time, where every door leads to a different parallel universe of past relationships—but only the ones where the emotional debris still lingers like a half-written text. You’re both the observer and the participant, reliving a moment that simultaneously happened
High – Lighthouse Family (Underrated 90s Classic)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! The song basically says, “Life is trash sometimes, but don’t worry, we’re going to spiritually parkour our way to happiness.”Think you know music?Every Friday, Tower Of Music puts your music knowledge to the test.Guess the artists. Spot the clues. Beat the hosts.Play along and see if you can make it to the top of the to
Boys From The Bush – Lee Kernaghan (Aussie Country Anthem)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! "Lads from the City" (to the tune of Boys From the Bush)Verse 1:We rolled up late in a four-wheel drive,GPS lost, barely made it alive.Tried to buy a latte, but the town was dry,Now we’re stuck in boots and swattin’ at flies.Chorus:We’re the lads from the city, we don’t belong,Took one step outside, now everyt
Hot In Herre – Nelly (Peak 2000s Party Chaos)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! Hark! The air be thick with sultry heat,And lo, mine garments do betray mine flesh!Wouldst thou not bid me cast them off anon,Lest I dost swelter in this fiery clime?Verily, the warmth doth set mine blood afire,A tempest rages ‘neath this weary brow.If thou, too, dost feel this fervent blaze,Then shed thy raiments, tarr
Just a Friend – Biz Markie (Funniest Song Ever Made?)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! "Just a Friend" by Biz Markie is a humorous and heartfelt hip-hop track about unrequited love and betrayal. The song tells the story of Biz falling for a girl who insists that another guy in her life is "just a friend." Despite his hopes, he eventually discovers that she was lying and was romanticall
Manic Monday – The Bangles (Prince Wrote This?!)
Want to request a song? Tell us your rating? Send us a Text Message right now! "It's just another manic MondayI wish it was Sunday'Cause that's my fun dayMy I-don't-have-to-run dayIt's just another manic Monday"Here’s a lyrically improved version while keeping the same theme and melody:"Caught up in a manic MondayDreaming of a slow dayA time to escapeNo rush
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