Morning Somewhere
Join Burnie Burns and Ashley Burns every weekday for a coffee-fueled morning discussion tackling pop culture and current events. The podcast includes linkdumps for every episode on their website and offers support via Patreon.
Episodes
2026.10.16: Promptology
Burnie and Ashley discusss the NLCS, the Brewers, Slow Horses, contract paralysis, Xbox Nano controllers, Hall-effect sticks, and vibe coding everything.
2026.10.15: The Dark Magic
Burnie and Ashley discuss visiting Pinballz arcade, pinball collections, claw machine prizes, Shohei Ohtani's slump, classic ice cream truck treats, Shiner whisky, Texas Sunday closures, livestreamed federal executions, the Texas Renaissance Festival, and shopping at Costco.1
2026.10.14: Coaster Posters
Burnie and Ashley discuss Austin yard work, coaster updates, kids fauna education, Odyssey home video, Obsession, Backrooms, inflight entertainment, and the evolving world of Halloween decorations.
2026.10.13: Introducing Mark Cobb
Burnie and Ashley discuss their trip to Austin, heat changes, park visits, amusement park accidents, information blackouts, hacker attacks, French protests, tiger attacks, Harambe, and pronouncing macabre.
2026.10.12: I Hate This Team
Burnie and Ashley discuss Texas losing to Oklahoma, the Red River Shootout, AP rankings, expensive high school football stadiums, an Irn-Bru lorry heist, Xbox cloud gaming, current console prices, riding in Waymos, Cyber Cabs, and kids pushing elevator buttons.
2026.10.09: Payroll Math
Burnie and Ashley discuss Yankees fan interference, baseball payroll math, the Milwaukee Brewers logo, tracking Xbox Mythic achievements, TrueAchievements spreadsheets, pneumonic plague, AI remaking Adobe software, Jon Stewart interviewing Jacob Coxon, Burnie's bald eagle publicity photo, and Microsoft's XP Studios.
2026.10.08: Diesels All The Way Down
Burnie and Ashley discuss Vin Diesel, diesel prices, red diesel, movie game adaptations, Halo as an early FPS, and iPhone depreciation.
2026.10.07: QoL Year
Burnie and Ashley discuss quality of life updates, builders and joiners, runaway highway tires, physics formulas, Duolingo nag-ware, Rosetta Stone discs, Paul Verhoeven, Skydance branding, the Emmys moving to streaming, Disney Plus pricing, David Pumpkins casting lore, the Helldivers movie, and debunked GTA VI cloud streaming rumors.
2026.10.06: Actuarial Helicopters
Burnie and Ashley discuss Tropic Thunder, Shane Black, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, comedy that ages poorly, Digger, Obsession's comedy classification, Triangle of Sadness, Russian plague, Tom Hanks David Pumpkins, weight equivalents, diesel costs, Theme Hospital, generational kid games, Oregon Trail, Might & Magic, game demos, Castle Wolfenstein 3D, Mythical achievements, and easy Mythical games.
2026.10.05: Where Are The Robots
Burnie and Ashley discuss David Pumpkins, Mike Myers, character comedy, Will Ferrell, The Hawk, Steam Autumn Sale, Two Point Museum, Roller Coaster Tycoon, AV cart days at school, MLB playoffs, AR room cleaning, gamifying life, the slow rollout of robots, inheiriting cheating bans, livestream fails, and the NCAA weekend wrap up.
2026.10.02: 5-in-1 Bodywash, Shampoo and Podcast
Burnie and Ashley discuss train culture, perfect environments, skin care routines, teenage skin problems, men's hygiene, mall kiosk beauty, eyebrow trends, microblading, paperbag jeans, moustache goofin, Fat Bear Week's winner, and the rise of nepo cubs.
2026.10.01: Welcome To The Skint
Burnie and Ashley discuss organizational strategies, bursts of energy, Minecraft new dimension, Dungeons II, Minecraft Legends, Mark Rober, minecraft builds, FlyDubai flight incident, mimicking television, best late year holiday, and the great debate of alpaca vs goose.
2026.09.30: Mythical Update
Burnie and Ashley discuss house projects, solar energy, Xbox goes Mythic, Xbox Insiders, Mythical etymology, gamerscore, disc to digtial, and supporting our fellow game players.
2026.09.29: VMA Deep Dive
Burnie and Ashley discuss the VMAs, Yung Lean, viral in 2026, Thousand Hand dance, Avantgardey, Aldi, Costco seasonal aisle, girl math coffee update, the VMAs, paying for stuff no one else pays for, the VMAs, airport shuttles, Madonna, Tom Cruise, and the easy move of being the bad ass.
2026.09.28: Giving Him The Business
Burnie and Ashley discuss college football, Coyote vs Acme, Resident Evil, Avengers Endgame DLC, Slither, The Abyss, Bluray releases, Astros Rangers playoff race, Nvidia Heist, porch pirates, shopping cart deposits, smuggling videocards INTO China, and trends that will end poorly.
2026.09.25: Soda Mode
Burnie and Ashley continue Phat Week by discussing Fat Bear updates, Marshmallow, Chonk, tap to pay controllers, NFL Blitz, QR code logins, bricked smart fridges, ice makers, Crescent ice, and Ashley pitches soda mode.
2026.09.24: Let Me Read This
Burnie and Ashley discuss ads everywhere, food noise, GLP-1 stories, Strange Days, World War Z 2, Tom Cruise oscar noms, Rain Man, institutions, pie irons, parental conspiracies, 8-bit music, and sea shanty dynamics.
2026.09.23: Ashley's Pumpkin Patch
Burnie and Ashley discuss the Norm documentary, Weekend Update, Lorne Michaels, Dirty Work, GLP lawsuits, how to figure out if you're blind, food noise, pumpkin genetics, Hurricane Polo, El Nino, hurricane season, podcast trends, beta update, and Xbox reorgs Halo Studios.
2026.09.22: Bear Mass Index
Burnie and Ashley discuss heating system woes, radiators, math on the fly, code switching, dehydrating frogs, GTA VI sales predictions, Fat Bears return, fattest countries, and placing our bets.
2026.09.21: Software Landing
Burnie and Ashley discuss train day trips, the Beeching Cuts, oil inflluence, AI regulation chatter, rogue agents, the moral obligation to keep AI online, Fire Emblem banana shortages, McDonalds Halo armor, Ole Miss, CAPTCHA tests, and the AP Top 25.
2026.09.18: Opening Acts
Burnie and Ashley discuss the Macklemore Free Palestine controversy, Streisand Effect, real activism, Extra Life, EU Canada, Resident Evil, and Zach Cregger gets adapting right.
2026.09.17: Grow Up, Cartologists
Burnie and Ashley discuss iPad recovery, lightning cables, gag reflexes, Top of the Line videogames, YouTube ad campaigns by nine year olds, The Infinite Extent, and revisiting The Bobiverse.
2026.09.16: What About Second Invention?
Burnie and Ashley discuss Hyrox, Crossfit, Sony gray out, re-inventing the MP3 player, Sidephone, slab phones, Steam frame, Meta Quest, and being the biggest part of the problem.
2026.09.15: Share Doxxing
Burnie and Ashley discuss the Emmy's, Sydney Sweeney gambling ads, Widow's Bay, Hacks, Google Calendar woes, The Pitt, evergreen TV settings, share doxxing, plastic cookies, and rage quitting the podcast.
2026.09.14: Life As A Paperclip
Burnie and Ashley discuss technical problems, white hat hackers, Car Play 2/Ultra, Texas comesback on Ohio State, Kim Kardashian, AP Top 25, NFL opening weekend, MLB playoffs, and stopping the season while we're ahead.
2026.09.11: Dub Stop
Burnie and Ashley discuss battery problems, lightning cables, King Of The Hill Race, Amazon AI mouth morphing, dub vs sub, boat ramp anxiety, and putt putt antics.
2026.09.10: More Is Less
Burnie and Ashley discuss Supergirl, Obsession, Bruce Wayne's foot in two worlds, Apple announcements, Microsoft's Duo, prices for mobile devices, cinema inflation, undergraduate costs, and Nicolas Cage, benevolent ruler.
2026.09.09: Lose By Winning
Burnie and Ashley discuss Michigan's removal from the Top 25, Colorado's fifth down, LIV bankruptcy, Mixer, lucrative deals that die quickly, first down technology, You Can See Everything, Alpha Gang, Canadian motorcycle ban, and UK travel woes.
2026.09.08: Seamless Transitions
Burnie and Ashley talk about lonely Thursday, Friday Eve, Guinness Heist, Florida welfare changes, UBI, subscription economies, Xbox cloud gaming changes, measuring usage, firing customers, Xbox Play Anywhere, and the death of physical.
2026.09.07: Labor Dazed
Burnie and Ashley discuss Labor Day, college football, iPhone 18 announcements, foldable phones, Dyson toothbrushes, stuff in your teeth, Norway bans "pervert" glasses, and the new world of College Football.
2026.09.04: M Bison, Known Communist
Burnie and Ashley discuss lifetime achievements, Gloria Steinem, Watership Down, Street Fight trailer, name switcheroo, American name generator, Lion King lawsuit ends, types of GPS, the new White House arcade, and the greatest Street Fighter character.
2026.09.03: The Age of Unreason
Burnie and Ashley discuss class action arbitration, Sony's unreasonable argument, expiring purchases, stripping away the factory, adding carcinogens, rawdogging consumer products, weird keyboards, and leaving the Age of Reason.
2026.09.02: Gamer Food
Burnie and Ashley discuss McDonald's Side Mission menu, limited edition foods, picky eating, Halo nuggets, Fallout Blamco Bites, Final Fantasy 7, cool kid Minecraft, Doublefine kickstarter, and being a good citizen of the stars.
2026.09.01: Halo Doesn't Afraid of Anything
Burnie and Ashley discuss prediction market bans George Santos, the Tornoto accent, low South African flyovers, vehicle boundaries, British back roads, vet tech weighs in, Messi retires, marching bands, and checking our wet bulbs.
2026.08.31: Fortnite Goes Smutty
Burnie and Ashley discuss new RTAA, Pumpking Spice, rabies goats, free treadmills, OK Go, rabies vaccines, seagull losses, Fortnite goes smutty, and pound vs pound.
[EXTRA] Jeff Hays Interview
Burnie sits down with the narrator of the wildly popular Dungeon Crawler Carl series. They discuss voice acting, collaboration, and starting a media business. Orginally intended as the 2026.08.24 episode, it is not released as an Extra episode. Enjoy!
2026.08.28: Alpha Toddler
Burnie and Ashley discuss GTA VI Extended Look, EA sells to Saudi investment, simming football, Big Ambitions, winner talk, Alpha camps, Civ VII, EV features, and eXistenZ.
2026.08.27: Self Reflexive Troubleshooting
Burnie and Ashley discuss Tim Curry, Legend, being beloved, Twitter abandonment lawsuit, Nepal floods, geological scale of humans, Willow, Meta settlement, Portal, and gamer parent wins.
2026.08.26: Now With Protein
Burnie and Ashley discuss Dolly Parton, celebrating a life when the person is alive, Gotham Irn Bru, Lego Skylines, Sim genre stall, and Protein everything.
2026.08.25: The MSPTS
Burnie and Ashley discuss acronyminating everything, Jeff Hays, narrator differences, Playstation protests, life as a boiling frog, Sony corporate responses, and How To Fish.
2026.08.24: GI Joe'd When I Should Have Scoobied
Burnie and Ashley discuss Ted Lasso Season 4, boneless couches, The Expanse opening crawl, Masters of the Universe, the Iranian Rial, US Canadian trade war, and warning bells in the nanny state.
2026.08.21: Mush Identification
Burnie and Ashley discuss spooky scary skeletons, Costco bargains, retail influencers, market volatility, Lanterns, streaming time slots, camera AirPods, Mush identification, and doing their part for mass surveillance.
2026.08.20: We Have Folding At Home
Burnie and Ashley discuss the VMA nominations, Madonna's nearly unprecedented longevity, BTC rally, Iran on the offensive, folding@home, and Moderna's cancer vaccine.
2026.08.19: Boneless Furniture
Burnie and Ashley discuss Scottish weather forecast, Austin's rain defense system, Penn State's fraternity drug ring, Van Wilder, National Lampoon, wikipedia high fives, and the Boneless Couch era begins.
2026.08.18: Personal Blast Radius
Burnie and Ashley discuss Snapdragon, emulation, printing issues, the Han Kuang war games, cameras to people, highest August gas prices, Collge Football Preseason poll, and the Grantown On Spey Remakery.
2026.08.17: Omega Level Everything
Burnie and Ashley discuss who is cooler, influencer degrees, YouTube's new requirements, D23, Xmen casting, Starfighter, Zootopia 3, and other D23 announcements.
2026.08.14: How Fast Train Go
Burnie and Ashley discuss co-parenting apologies, our community experts, Apple Maps making a comeback, windmill talk, construction talk, Polymarket betting on wildfires, and Chinese bullet trains.
2026.08.13: Range Anxiety Creeps Inside Of Me
Burnie and Ashley discuss their 14-hour road trip, The Treenis, Tubbee's, EVs, range anxiety, THE NORTH, and road trip rules.
2026.08.12: Let's See Some ID
Burnie and Ashley discuss eclipses, preparing too soon, age verification, Steam leaks, good personal data vs bad personal data, and getting phished.
2026.08.11: Air Traffic Console
Burnie and Ashley discuss GenZ 9/11 accountability, two factor bomb defusal, Lando Norris, gamer air traffic controller, ATC achievments, muscle memory driving, panic response, pre-written obituaries, and panic responses.
2026.08.10: Robe And Wizard Hat
Burnie and Ashley discuss sexting, One Night Only, romcom romps, Gen X puritanism, hippie reversal, Spokane fire, Spiderman, the spoiler window, Lando Norris Monsters, and the mental nature of flavors.
2026.08.07: People Like Swings
Burnie and Ashley double down on Lumalee, discuss animation casting, Mario stolen valor, influencer double downs, the Spiderman bump, swinging mechanics, Bionic Commando, Iranian strait plans, Odyssey, and Nolan's ever-growing troupe.
2026.08.06: Slop With Friends
This episode contains discussions of self harm. Burnie and Ashley discuss Roblox, gaming valuations, laying off players, friend slop, Fall Guys, Among Us, SpaceX to the moon, solar eclipses, asteroid near passes, and the mechanics & limits of empathy.
2026.08.05: Male Prep
Burnie and Ashley discuss fond farewells, guy group dynamics, British privacy laws, the Texas nanny state, Discord ID verification, THC laws in the Lone Star state, and being the highest regarded authority in all marijuana topics.
2026.08.04: Nihilism's Cute Era
Burnie and Ashley discuss BWM's latest enshittification efforts, Spiderman box office, box office records, realistic CGI, God of War, Bautista, and when nihilism goes cute.
2026.08.03: Power Couplings
Burnie and Ashley discuss Spider Man, billion dollar weekends, biggest power couples, and AI authoring.
2026.07.31: Cowju
Burnie and Ashley discuss their personal beef, cow wrangling, monster cow, Nic Cage, stolen film, bison domestication, Spiderman Brand New Day, and Gaelic Football. UPDATE: Now featuring today's episode. Depending on your podcast service you may need to re-download.
2026.07.30: Perfect Beef
Burnie and Ashley discuss hangover cures, jet lag, tortillas, Altman, weird people, weird billionaires, cow deflation, duress passwords, Fed stalls, and poisoning the conversation well.
2026.07.29: The Scale Of Self
Burnie and Ashley discuss the singularity, chip sell off, Sam Altman, scale problems, self awareness, dealing with anxiety, and Ashley's movie dilemma.
2026.07.28: Hoop & Look
Burnie and Ashley discuss YouTuber voice, transatlantic accents, hurricanes and wildfires, controller holding methodologies, Steam Machine experiences, million dollar faceplate ideas, smartphone life, and moving on from circumspection.
2026.07.27: The One With The Whataburger Cup
Burnie and Ashley discuss Halo Campaign Evolved, Odyssey second weekend record, when woke doesn't go broke, San Diego Comic Con round up, the wind down of the comic movei era, Lanterns, Blade Runner 2099, how to stop talking, Resident Evil, being a casual fan, Neuromancer, Mike Flanagan, and the world's biggest conventions.
2026.07.24: Somebody Got Caught
Burnie and Ashley discuss travel days, Amazon carts, LG monitors, nutrition stopgaps, dude trips, squatting, Xbox PC compatiblity, bad mobile ads, job interview, landscape tissue boxes, Costco, Sam Rockwell, Jeff Hays, and DCC casting news.
2026.07.23: Aspect Ratioed
Burnie and Ashley discuss lava floors, new shoes, the gun counter, TSA massages, Neil Blompkamp's AI movie, District 10, Elysium, Odyssey, IMAX aspect ratios, Prime reconfigures ad free, pillar boxes, and getting back together.
2026.07.22: Good Morning From Heck
Burnie and Blaine discuss swapping roles, Amazing Race, Drag Race, Austin Food spots, Doomsday trailer, and the terrible conundrum of Roko's Basilisk.
2026.07.21: Who Took The Games Out Of Gamestop?
Burnie and Blaine discuss wedding cuts, running, growing older, World Cup farewell, Burnie's Futball Journey, Fallout goes into development, AI bashing, fall of arcades, collectibles, regulations good and bad, alcohol following cigarettes, and millenial youthfulness.
2026.07.20: Stunt Troubles
Burnie and Blaine discuss God of War injury recasting, hauntings, Blaine's bicep injury, the difficulty of casting, Blaine's live show, Answer For It, and the Stinky Dragon Podcast.
2026.07.17: Deer Dearth Done
Burnie and Becca discuss screw worm, Ebola, Alamo Drafthouse, deer populations, conservation efforts, Zelle, America's antiquated payment systems, and cool projects.
2026.07.16: Couple of Industry Plants
Burnie and guest host Jason discuss humidity, eating in Austin, TexMex glory, old eating, World Cup updates, IMAX emotions, Minions, Trey Parker, PG-13 rules, sensitive adlibs, Buc-ee's, lead vests, and being industry plants.
2026.07.15: Clean Sheets
Burnie and Ashley discuss kid logistics, Austin weather, Utah heat wave, the weird American box office, Moana flops, Spain soaring, Black Flag breaking records, Big Red vs Irn Bru, and being in Rome.
2026.07.14: Football Is Job
Burnie and Ashley discuss World Cup semifinals, Danny Rojas real life football player, Ted Lasso, actors doing their roles in real life, Sam Neill, Jurassic Park, Event Horizon, AI journalist, and American tolls on Hormuz.
2026.07.13: How Many Icelands
Burnie and Ashley discuss the farewell to Ashley's favorite World Cup player, stealing chants, Iceland population, berry season, watching media without your spouse, Odyssey, Fallout Season 2, and missed opportunities.
2026.07.10: Free Money
Burnie and Ashley discuss free money, hydration breaks, girl math, buffet life, Scotland's proposed Euro precursor, Count Binface, and the steady demise of leadership.
2026.07.09: Single Serving
Burnie and Ashley don't discuss the World Cup, but do discuss New York buckling skyscrapers, high rise living, and single season TV shows.
2026.07.08: On To Eight
Burnie and Ashley discuss World Cup results, EV battery longevity, Burnie's early adoption win, Ozone depletion, new molecules in space, and naming scientific discoveries.
2026.07.07: Our Robot Journey
Burnie and Ashley discuss sunscreen, refelctor trays, Jet2 Holidays, World Cup results, Xbox layoffs, the steady decline of AirBnB, and moving ahead in their robot journey.
2026.07.06: Last Minute Deals
Burnie and Ashley discuss actually using a last minute travel deal, British people gone wild, World Cup abroad, Norway vs Brazil, England vs Mexico, DCCTV, and cutting corners wherever we can.
2026.07.03: Life In The Coma Dream
Burnie and Ashley discuss summer holidays, investing too much in nothing, Spotify betting manipulation, AI scrutiny, Subnautica's drama marketing, GTA's potential faceplant, and the long cycle of development in the 2020's.
2026.07.02: Let's All Go To The Bar
Burnie and Ashley discuss Sony going digital, PR timing, talking to other departments, England vs DR Congo, Harry Kane, and all your World Cup news.
2026.07.01: Lamborghini Mules
Burnie and Ashley gab about World Cup Scores, the Japanese Yen hits a 40 year low, Calls From The Public, Persona Live Action, and the Commodore Phone.
2026.06.30: Super Vision
Burnie and Ashley discuss World Cup results, Japanese economic updates, WhatsApp usernames, building a brand, Xe, Bosnia and Herzegovina, fantasy sports, betting on war, and Persona teasers.
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