The Sex After Kids Podcast
The Sex After Kids Podcast helps couples reconnect and add more play to their relationship after having children. Host Sofia Ashley offers advice on how to get back into the bedroom for more frequent and satisfying intimate moments. The podcast focuses on improving couple connection and sexual fun after kids.
Episodes
Why Women Shut Down Sexually — It’s Not What You Think
Send us Fan MailWhy do so many women shut down sexually in long-term relationships?In this episode, we’re talking about the emotional dynamic underneath sexual shutdown, rejection loops, pressure, and disconnection… especially after kids.This conversation explores:why desire can “go underground”how women are taught to manage men’s emotionsthe connection between boundaries, sexuality, and emotional
Why S*x After Kids Feels Awkward Sometimes (And Why That’s Normal)
Send us Fan MailWhat does real intimacy after kids actually look like?In this episode of the S*x After Kids podcast, I’m sharing a real-life bedroom dispatch — including the awkward moments, miscommunication, nervous system shutdown, and honest conversations that almost made us stop halfway through intimacy.Because real s*x after kids doesn’t always look effortless or spontaneous.Sometimes it look
The 4 Traps Keeping Good Men Stuck in S*xless Marriages After Kids
Send us Fan MailIf you're a husband feeling rejected, lonely, or stuck in a s*xless marriage after kids, this episode is for you.Many higher-libido men are trying everything they can to improve intimacy—helping more around the house, avoiding conflict, staying patient, and waiting for things to get better. But sometimes those efforts unintentionally keep couples trapped in the same cycle.In t
You’re Not “Low Libido” — You’re Over-Needed After Kids
Send us Fan MailIf you feel touched out, exhausted, and completely shut down by the end of the day… this episode is for you.In this episode of the Sx After Kids Podcast, we’re talking about why so many moms and lower-libido partners stop wanting sx after kids — and why it’s often NOT actually a libido problem.We’re unpacking:Why desire disappears after kidsThe “over-needed” nervous systemWhy press
5 Things Killing Your S*x Life After Kids (That Have Nothing to Do With S*x)
Send us Fan MailIf you feel like your relationship has turned into roommates after kids… this is for you.This episode breaks down 5 things that are quietly killing your sx life after kids — that have nothing to do with sx.Because for most couples, it’s not about desire, effort, or “trying harder.”It’s about the patterns that build distance without you even realizing it.In this episode, we talk abo
Why Therapy Didn’t Fix Your Sex Life (And What Actually Will)
Send us Fan MailYou’ve tried therapy. You’ve had the hard conversations. So why does your sex life still feel stuck?If you feel like you’ve done everything “right” but still end up lying in bed feeling more like roommates than partners… this episode will help you understand why.In this episode of the Sex After Kids podcast, we break down:Why therapy doesn’t always fix intimacyThe real reason your
What Actually Changes When You Fix Your Sex Life (It’s Not What You Think)
Send us Fan MailWhat actually changes when couples fix their sex life?It’s not just more sex.It’s how you talk about it. How you experience it. And how you feel with each other.In this episode of the Sex After Kids podcast, we break down the real shifts couples experience when they rebuild intimacy—without pressure, awkwardness, or constant conflict.This is not the “everything is fixed overnight”
Why Couples Stop Having Sex After Kids (And How to Fix It)
Send us Fan MailWhy does sex feel so much harder after kids—even when you still love each other?Most couples don’t fall out of love.They fall into patterns where connection gets replaced with pressure, shutdown, and silence.In this episode of the Sex After Kids podcast, we break down:Why intimacy changes after kidsThe real reason sex starts to feel complicated or avoidedThe pressure/shutdown dynam
What Couples with Great Sex Lives Do Differently
Send us Fan MailAre you and your partner amazing co-parents but struggling to feel like lovers—especially with kids in the mix? You're not alone! In this episode, I break down the five habits that help couples with kids move beyond survival mode and rediscover playful, connected intimacy, no matter how busy life gets.We'll talk about radical curiosity, honest feedback, the power of laugh
Why am I avoiding sex after kids?
Send us Fan MailThis is a love letter for anyone who's lost touch with desire and feels the weight of expectation after kids. I know what it's like to feel shut down and alone in your relationship. You don't want sex, you don't know why and everytime he asks it feels like he’s making it a personal failure on your part. In this episode, I unpack the truth behind "not tonigh
The Silent Reversal: When You're the One Wanting More (And He Doesn't)
Send us Fan MailEver find yourself wanting intimacy more than your husband—and wondering what changed after kids? You're not alone. In this episode, I'm talking about the real reasons behind this shift, why "trying harder" isn’t working, and how to start changing the dynamic in your marriage without losing yourself.If you're ready to break out of the cycle and reconnect wi
It's Not Your Libido—It's Your Relationship to Pleasure (Why Desire Disappears)
Send us Fan Mail"I just don't care about sex anymore."If that thought has crossed your mind, you're not alone—and it might not be about libido at all. In this episode, we explore how pleasure often disappears from everyday life (especially for parents), and why that has a direct impact on desire.We talk about stress, caretaker mode, and how reconnecting with small moments of en
The Myth of Natural Sex: Why Great Sex Is Actually a Social Skill
Send us Fan MailMost couples are walking into their sex life with the same quiet assumption:If the relationship is good... And if there's love and attraction...Then sex should just work.And when it doesn't?It's easy to believe something is wrong—with you, your partner, or the relationship itself.In this episode, we challenge that belief completely.Because great sex isn't someth
The Inner Critic Ruining Your Sex Life
Send us Fan MailEver feel like you're watching yourself during sex instead of actually enjoying it?In this episode, we're diving into the concept of spectatoring—a form of sexual self-consciousness where you're mentally observing and judging yourself during intimate moments instead of being present in your body.If you've ever found yourself thinking things like "What do I
How to Rebuild Sexual Desire: The Positive Feedback Loop of Great Sex
Send us Fan MailWhat if rebuilding sexual desire wasn't about trying harder — but about changing the experiences your body associates with sex?In this episode, we explore the concept of the positive feedback loop of great sex and how your nervous system plays a powerful role in whether intimacy feels inviting or overwhelming. When sexual experiences feel safe, pleasurable, and connected, your
[RETRO] Ready for More Fun, Play, and Connection? An Invitation to My Signature Program!
Send us Fan MailWhy does sex after kids suddenly feel so complicated?Many couples fall into a quiet pattern after becoming parents: one partner keeps initiating, the other starts avoiding, and both end up feeling rejected, pressured, or disconnected.Over time flirting disappears, intimacy becomes tense, and sex slowly fades out of the relationship.In this throwback episode of the Sex After Kids Po
[RETRO EPISODE] 5 Ways Shitty Sex-ed is Messing With Your Sex Life Post Kids
Send us Fan MailIn this throwback episode of the 'Sex After Kids' podcast, I delve into the significance of sex education and its lasting effects on adult sex lives, particularly after having children. We cover several key points, including the failure of sex education to address pleasure, the importance of self pleasure, the need for detailed anatomical knowledge, and the impact of soci
Stop Fumbling in the Dark: Sex After Kids & Perimenopause (Low Desire, Arousal Changes & Intimacy After Kids)
Send us Fan MailIf sex after kids feels confusing, inconsistent, or like your body just isn't responding the way it used to — you're not broken.Many women experience low desire, slower arousal, discomfort during sex, or a loss of libido during perimenopause and after having children. But most couples aren't taught how intimacy changes during this stage of life — so they assume somet
How to Want Sex Again in Perimenopause — Without Forcing Yourself
Send us Fan MailIf sex feels like a chore in your 40s or 50s, you're not broken.In this episode of the Sex After Kids Podcast, we're unpacking why desire disappears during perimenopause — even when love hasn't — and how to reconnect with intimacy without pushing through pain or guilt.You'll learn:How hormone shifts impact desire, arousal, and lubricationWhy stress and mental lo
What Really Changes "Down There" After Childbirth and Menopause
Send us Fan MailWhy does sex feel different after having kids — or in perimenopause and midlife? Flatter, harder, painful, or just... off?You're not broken. And your body isn't failing you.In this episode, we talk about what actually happens to your body, brain, and nervous system after childbirth, postpartum, and hormonal shifts — and how to start rebuilding intimacy, even if things fee
Stop Being Quiet in Bed — It's Weird (Here's Why Perfection Kills Pleasure)
Send us Fan MailWhat if the biggest mood killer in your sex life isn't lack of desire, time, or chemistry—but the pressure to be perfect?In this episode, we're digging into why chasing "perfect sex" actually leads to more awkwardness, less connection, and way less fun. Plus, how to shift from performance mode into curiosity and communication.We cover:Why performance anxiety sho
You're Secretly Sabotaging Your Sex Life (And You Don't Even Know It)
Send us Fan MailWelcome to Season 2! We're kicking things off with a hard truth: If sex feels awkward, disconnected, or just plain off, you might be sabotaging your own sex life without realizing it.In this episode, I'm sharing three traps that quietly kill intimacy — even in the most loving relationships — and what you can do to turn things around.We'll talk about:Why "special
Season Preview: Make 2026 Your Best Year Together
Send us Fan MailIs your relationship feeling more like roommates than romantic partners? You're not alone—and you're not stuck.In this episode, I'm walking you through the proven framework that's helping couples reconnect and rebuild intimacy in a real, practical way. We'll talk about:The four phases of intimacy every couple experiencesWhy sex after kids matters more than
When Sex Brings Up Shutdown, Tears, or Rushing, What's Actually Happening
Send us Fan MailHave you ever had sex end in shutdown, rushing, or unexpected emotion, and neither of you knew what just happened?In this intimate episode of the Sex After Kids Podcast, I explore why sex can feel heavy, confusing, or emotionally charged for couples, even when there is love and desire on both sides.This episode is for you if:One partner shuts down, goes numb, or gets emotional duri
Why You Feel Unchosen, Unsexy, and Alone (Even in a Good Relationship)
Send us Fan MailWhy do you feel unchosen, unsexy, and alone, even when your relationship looks "fine"?If you're the one always initiating hard conversations, tracking emotional distance, or trying to "fix" disconnection... you may be managing the emotional labor of the relationship by yourself.And over time, that role quietly erodes safety, intimacy, and desire, not becaus
Fair Play, Real Life: How We Manage the Mental Load as a Couple
Send us Fan MailHow do you actually share the mental load without constant fighting, resentment, or feeling like you’re doing it all?This is part 3 of a 4-part series on the mental load — and today, we're getting practical.I'm sharing how my partner and I used the Fair Play Method by Eve Rodsky to manage the mental load in our house — what worked, what didn't, and how we adapted it
How to Talk About the Mental Load Without Starting a Fight
Send us Fan MailIf talking about the mental load already feels like walking into a fight, this episode is for you.Because most mental load conversations don’t fail due to bad intentions — they fail because couples are stuck in an unspoken manager–assistant dynamic that kills safety, teamwork, and desire.In this episode, we unpack:Why the mental load isn't just about chores, but responsibility
Mental Load 101: Why You're Fighting More... and Having Sex Less
Send us Fan MailIf the two of you feel like you're living in the same house but carrying completely different worlds, this episode will hit home.Welcome to Mental Load 101. This is the first in a four episode series that explains why resentment is high, intimacy is low, and why you keep having the same fights no matter how many systems or chore charts you try.In today's episode:• What th
Why Porn Feels Easier Than Intimacy (And What It's Really Costing You)
Send us Fan MailPorn often feels like the easier option — no pressure, no rejection, no emotional work. But when it becomes your go-to outlet, it can quietly chip away at intimacy, connection, and confidence... without you even noticing.This episode isn't about shame. It's about clarity. We're unpacking the real impact of porn in relationships — especially if you're a dad, a ma
"Not Tonight" Isn't the Problem — Your Reaction Is.
Send us Fan MailIf you're the higher-libido partner and every "not tonight" feels like a gut-punch, this episode might change everything.Because it's not the rejection that turns her off — it's how you respond afterward.Most men were never taught what to do when sex disappears after babies, stress, or burnout. When connection feels out of reach, every "no" can tr
What You’re Really Asking for When You Ask for Sex on Repeat
Send us Fan MailYou keep initiating. She keeps pulling away.If you're a dad (or higher-libido partner) hearing "stop pressuring me," this is for you.You're not broken, creepy, or needy — you're reaching for connection with the only tool you've got.Let's show you a better one.Try my Roommates to Romance Challenge to create connection, rebuild trust, and bring the
Fatherhood and Sex Questioning the Status Quo with Dan Doty
Send us Fan MailWhy do dads seem to shut down after kids, or push for sex that doesn't feel connected?Dan Doty has spent 20 years working with men and boys in deeply intimate spaces. In this episode, he shares why sex often feels like survival for dads, and why so many men feel emotionally orphaned after becoming parents.If your partner seems checked out or constantly initiating (and you&apo
Your Partner's in Perimenopause? Why Your Flirting Isn't Working
Send us Fan MailIf you’re tired of hearing "not tonight," this episode is for you. For the partner who is asking for sex all the time, facing constant rejection feels personal. It chips away at your confidence and makes you want to stop trying altogether. But what if the "no" isn't about you at all?This episode is the final installment of our Perimenopause + Intimacy serie
Hormones, Mood Swings, and Midlife WTFs: An Interview with Brooke from Marriage in Perimenopause
Send us Fan MailIf you've ever found yourself wondering, "Who even am I right now?" - you're not alone.This episode is a must-listen for couples navigating midlife, marriage, and the hormonal rollercoaster known as perimenopause (and andropause — yes, it's a thing). My guest Brooke Davis gets real about how these changes can wreck emotional regulation and connection if we’
Perimenopause & Libido: A guide for you and your partner
Send us Fan MailIf your partner's libido seems MIA since perimenopause showed up or if you are wondering where your own went, this episode is for you.We're unpacking what's really going on with libido changes in this season, and how to stop treating each other like broken sex robots.This is part 2 of our Perimenopause + Intimacy series, and today's convo includes the science of
Perimenopause is Wrecking Our Sex Life, What Now?
Send us Fan MailIf you're feeling like roommates instead of lovers, perimenopause might be playing a bigger role than you think.Whether you're the higher libido partner waiting for things to "go back to normal," or the one navigating body changes, stress, and zero desire... you're not alone.This episode kicks off our Perimenopause + Intimacy series — and it's packed w
Stressed Out and Touched Out? The Nervous System Secrets to Wanting Sex Again
Send us Fan MailToday we are going deeper into how your stress impacts your relationship, and your intimacy, and what to do about it. We have a special guest interview this week on the podcast with Naturopath Heather Drummond whose speciality is the nervous system. Timestamps:0:00 - Introduction & Guest Welcome3:59 - Heather's Background & Nervous System Work6:43 - Nervous System Resp
Sex or Stress? How to Tell When It’s Really a “No” and When It’s Not
Send us Fan MailDo you mistake stress or tiredness for a hard no when it comes to intimacy? You’re not alone! In this episode, I unpack the “traffic lights” of the nervous system and how to stop defaulting to NO—so you can discover more ways to say yes (or a real, empowered maybe) to connection after kids.Timestamps & What You’ll Learn:00:14 – Introduction to Sex After Kids Podcast00:59 – Unde
Ready for More Fun, Play, and Connection? An Invitation to The Naked Fun Comeback™
Send us Fan MailReady to get out of the initiate-and-avoid rut and back to playful, flirty, connected sex - without the pressure? In this special episode, I share why I created The Naked Fun Comeback™, what makes it different from all the "just try harder" advice, and how you can join this summer's case study group.Timestamps:00:00 – Welcome & why this is a direct invitation epi
A Sensorium Date Night
Send us Fan MailSave this one for Saturday night. Follow along during this guided date and see where the evening takes you. In this episode of the Sex After Kids Podcast I share a guided date night experience from the Sex After Kids Summit Vault. Follow along as I show you through one of my favourite activities to get you out of busy parent mode and into landed lover mode. These guided date night
Sex Coach vs. Couples Counselling: Which Is Right for You?
Send us Fan MailWondering if you need a sex coach, a couples counsellor, or both? I discuss my honest take on how each one can help, what most couples are really feeling (and why), and why it’s not about “fixing” you or your partner—but learning new skills together.Timestamps & What You’ll Learn:01:14 – Sex Coach vs Couples Counsellor03:09 – Common Relationship Struggles05:03 – Why Most People
Sexless Marriage: How to Save Your Relationship Before Divorce
Send us Fan MailLet’s just put it out there: If you’re in a sexless marriage, you’ve probably had at least one “Would this just be easier if we split up?” moment. Maybe you’ve even daydreamed about a solo life—until you remember that modern dating sounds absolutely exhausting. (No, thank you!)If you’re even flirting with the D-word—even in your head—this episode is for you. Because keeping those w
The Truth About Postpartum Sex: Navigating Intimacy When Your Body Feels Different (Whether It’s Months or Years Later)
Send us Fan MailWhether you’re fresh into postpartum or it’s been years since your last baby and your body still feels unfamiliar, you’re not alone. In this episode, I get radically real about intimacy, body image, and feeling sexy in the body you have—right now.What You’ll Learn:01:08 — Intimacy & Body Image After Kids01:32 — The Reality of Postpartum Bodies02:48 — Pressure, Partners, and Sel
Foreplay Games for Couples: Playful Ways to Get Out of the Roommate Rut After Kids - Especially when it’s been a while
Send us Fan MailFeeling awkward about intimacy after kids, or stuck in the “roommate rut?” You’re not alone. In this episode, I share why foreplay (and the “pre-game” before it) is the real secret to rekindling connection—and how to make it feel safe, pressure-free, and fun (especially for the lower libido partner).What we cover:01:06 — Rethinking Foreplay & Getting Started Again02:11 — Zero P
The Truth About Scheduled Sex: How to Rekindle Intimacy in Marriage
Send us Fan MailIs scheduled sex really the death of desire…or is it your secret weapon for reigniting connection after kids? In this episode, Sofia (your TMI bedroom advice bestie for parents) busts the myths about putting sex on the calendar—and shows you how to turn obligation into anticipation.What You’ll Learn:01:07 Debunking the Scheduled Sex Myth01:21 Why People Resist Scheduling Sex01:50 S
Best Sex Books for Couples: Expert Picks for a Better Love Life
Send us Fan MailFeeling like “roommates” instead of lovers? You’re not alone. In this episode, I share my absolute favourite sex books that every parent should have on their nightstand—plus the real-life stories and expert tips behind each pick.What you'll learn:The best books for reigniting desire and connection after kidsHow to talk about sex without shame or awkwardnessWhy exploring togeth
Tired of Couples Counselling? Try These Relationship-Saving Alternatives
Send us Fan MailIn this episode I share when my partner and I went to couples counselling after the birth of our first child. From my post-partum anxiety I was experiencing resentment and contempt and didn’t want this to be the theme of our relationship. In this episode I cover: 04:05 Why I hated admitting they needed help 06:12 Why everything wasn’t all my partners fault (much as I wanted it to b
The One Secret That Changed My Sex Life After Kids
Send us Fan MailIn this deeply personal episode, I’m sharing the one secret that helped me go from six months of shut-down to regularly saying yes (and even initiating!)—without faking, forcing, or bypassing my body’s needs.My vagina had a tantrum last week and we are going to talk about it. Whether you're the higher libido partner wondering what’s going on behind the “no,” or the lower libi
Fixing the Mental Load Won’t Save Your Sex Life
Send us Fan MailFeeling resentful, disconnected, or just done with intimacy because you're the one holding everything together?Or maybe you're doing your share—and still hearing that it’s not enough?This episode is for you.We’re diving into the mental load: what it really is, how it impacts your nervous system (and your sex life), and why even splitting things 50/50 doesn’t always fix th
From Touched Out to Turned On: 5 Truths You Need to Hear
Send us Fan MailStruggling with low desire or no sex after kids? You're not alone—and you're not broken. In this episode of The Sex After Kids Podcast, sex and intimacy coach Sofia from The Happy Vagina Project shares 5 mindset shifts to help couples reconnect, reignite desire, and break out of the dreaded “Not Tonight” cycle.Whether you're feeling touched out, rejected, or just num
The Real Reason Your Partner is Avoiding Sex (And Why It’s Not What You Think)
Send us Fan MailEver found yourself thinking, “Why are they always avoiding sex?” Or maybe you’ve felt the sting of rejection and started to question your relationship, your desirability, or your skills in bed.This episode of the Sex After Kids Podcast flips that narrative on its head.We’re diving into the real reasons behind intimacy avoidance—especially after becoming parents. Spoiler: it’s not
The 3 Basic Bitch Tips That are Changing My Sex Life After Kids
Send us Fan MailFlirting with the D-word (Divorce)? Or just feeling like roommates with a mortgage and a laundry pile that never ends? So many couples are experiencing the same thing, but they don’t have the secret sauce I’ll share in this episode. Today we are talking all about the small, not-so-sexy things that make a massive difference. I’m talking: ✨ Undivided attention (yes, even for 3 minute
Let’s Get It On: Rebuilding Erotic Energy When Life Is Anything But Sexy
Send us Fan MailWe have another bedroom dispatch for you this week on the Sex After Kids Podcast. In this episode, we’re throwing out the Bridgerton fantasy and getting real about what it takes to feel sexy when you’re touched-out, overstimulated, and secretly fantasizing about alone time with your book boyfriend.Listen as I walk you through how I use my signature Time Together Blueprint to turn a
6 Myths Killing the Bedroom Vibes After Kids
Send us Fan MailWhat if the stories you’ve been taught about sex—what it should look like, feel like, and mean—are the real reason it’s not working? In this episode of the Sex After Kids Podcast, we’re unpacking six cultural myths that sneak into your bedroom and sabotage connection. From spontaneous desire to sexual obligation, we’re breaking it all down—and offering a new way forward. 🎙️ What we
Why playing by the rules of consent can reset your sex life after kids
Send us Fan Mail What if the hottest thing you could bring into the bedroom… was a question? In this episode of the Sex After Kids Podcast, we’re talking about consent—not the swipe-right kind, but the long-term, tired-parents, messy-realities kind. Consent isn’t just about saying “yes” or “no.” It’s how we build trust, support nervous systems, and create sex that feels good for both of you. We co
Getting Out of Your Head and Into Your Body During Sex
Send us Fan MailThis week we have another bedroom dispatch from my sheets to your ears. I share these to normalize what real sexy times look like and to show you how my I use my own tools in my real life - so you can see who they work for you. This week you'll hear how I turned complaining about my body into a lovely romp in the hay with my partner using my Time Together Blueprint - four simp
Finding a New Sexual Self After Kids
Send us Fan MailIn this episode of the Sex After Kids Podcast, we explore one of the most tender and often unspoken transitions parents face: grieving your pre-kids sexual self. Whether your relationship with sex was neutral, fraught, or thriving before kids, the shifts that come after can feel disorienting — and sometimes heartbreaking. Join me as we talk about:Why your sexual identity changes af
Let's Talk Duty Sex (After Kids)
Send us Fan MailIf you are a parent you have likely at some point or another engaged in duty sex - sex that you had because you felt you had to or felt pressured to - to keep the peace or to keep your partner happy. You don't need to be a sexologist to know that this can have an impact on your relationship. This week we break down a study by Dr. Cami Hurst on Duty sex. We'll talk about-
Using a Pleasure Diet to Bring Back your Libido After Kids
Send us Fan MailAre you the fun police in your house? Always 10 steps ahead of what your kids and partner need, hardly ever just in the present moment. This could be what's killing your libido. In today's episode of the Sex After Kids Podcast we talk about:- how stress creates armour against pleasure- how pleasure is the medicine you need to combat stress and create connection in your li
Sex After Delivery - What to Expect and How to Prepare
Send us Fan MailThis week's episode is for the new parents out there. If you are a seasoned vet make sure to pass this on to any new and expecting parents you know. We are going to talk about :- the 6 biggest myths about sex after delivery and how they will create bad habits for your sex life into the future- my top tips for staying connected through the early years. - my favourite tool for r
How to Have Better Conversations About Your Sex Life with Marriage Coach Michelle Purta
Send us Fan MailThis week on the podcast we have guest Michelle Purta, a marriage and communications coach. This week she will guide us through how to start the conversation about our sex life and how to move forward if we are stuck in a cycle argument on this topic. Michelle and I had to record this conversation three times due to some tech glitches so we thank you for your listening patience. To
Avoiding Sex? Support Your/Your Partners Nervous System
Send us Fan MailIn this episode we are doing a deep dive into one of the key ingredients of a great sex life - the nervous system. When we talk about creating safety for ourselves and our partner this is what we mean - working with the nervous system to get out of fight or flight. When your partner is avoiding talking to you about sex, avoids sex, or rushes through sex - there's a nervous sys
Your Fantasies Might Be Killing Your Sex Life After Kids
Send us Fan MailIn this week's episode of the Sex After Kids Podcast Sex Coach Sofia talks about how your fairy smut, daydreams about your ex and porn usage might be killing your sex life and what to do about it. No shade to fantasy, erotica or ethical porn here - and it be both helpful and harmful to our sexual connection. In this episode Sofia breaks down:how fantasy can fuel great sexpecta
Talk to your Vagina to Find Your Libido After Kids
Send us Fan MailIn this episode Sofia talks about an often overlooked way to reconnect with your body, your pleasure and your libido after kids. We'll cover: - why talking to your VJJ is so important - 3 ways to get to know your body better (without self pleasure) - how becoming BFFS with her VJJ changed the game for her sex lifeLinks: OMGYES. https://start.omgyes.com/join?irclickid=TFV3CQQ8T
5 Parenting Tips That Have Transformed My Sex Life
Send us Fan MailIn this episode, host Sofia shares the lightbulb moment when she realized the parenting tools she was using to support her family to more peaceful moments and cooperation, could help her find more connection and less conflict with her partner, both in and out of the bedroom. Join her as she walks through her five favourite strategies and how they help her to be a better mom, a bett
Why focusing on the P in the V has got you stuck in monotonous sex - and what to do instead
Send us Fan MailThis week on the Sex After Kids Podcast Sofia explores more sex alphabet soup. This week she breaks down:One of the biggest misconceptions about sex that will keep you trapped in the monotony of maintenance sex. How opening up to Discovery Mode is going to unlock more excitement and anticipation in your sex life after kids. Why embracing a new P and V (hint they are not penis and v
How welcoming masturbation into your marriage will improve your sex life after kids
Send us Fan MailToday we are talking about the M word. Masturbation or self-pleasure can be a super taboo topic, especially when we bring it up in the context of long term relationships or marriage. In todays' episode Sofia tackles the reasons we avoid self-pleasure in our LTR, and makes the case for how the right kind of masturbation practice can actually make you a better lover. Got questio
The Mighty Orgasm and Other Famous Rivers
Send us Fan MailI have something special for you on todays' episode. A throwback to 2015 when I did a Pecha Kucha talk (who remembers that cultural moment) and I gave a talk about orgasms and rivers. It's 6 minutes, totally hilarious and I hope it moves you.
How the Good Mother / Good Father Archetype is Blocking Your Intimacy
Send us Fan MailIn this Episode of the Sex After Kids Podcast I was inspired to reflect on the ways that the archetypes of the Good Mother and The Good Father affect our ability to have great bedroom time. I was inspired by a new book coming out called The Good Mother Myth: Unlearning Our Bad Ideas About Being A Good Mom by Nancy Reddy - to explore how the stereotype can limit our ability to sink
Stop Avoiding Scheduled Sex and Do This Instead
Send us Fan MailI get it… you are le tired of people telling you to schedule sex… cause it’s lame, not spontaneous, unsexy, or how the F are you going to be able to guarantee that your libido is going to show up on demand. In this episode of the Sex After Kids Podcast we break down your hangups about scheduled sex, four reasons to get over it anyways, and I break down my four step formula for sche
How to talk about your sex life after kids
Send us Fan MailIn this episode of the Sex After Kids Podcast Sofia shares a session from the 2024 Sex After Kids Summit. If you have ever wondered how to open the conversation about your sex life after kids, or if it feels impossible to get what you want in your relationship now that kids are in the mix, this episode is a must. Let's talk about why its so hard and what you can do it about it
Do you really have no time for sex? Or is it something else ?
Send us Fan MailIn this episode of the Sex After Kids Podcast, Sex Coach Sofia Ashley challenges couples to explore what they are doing with their time, and how those choices impact their intimacy and their relationship. She explores four reasons why you might be using lack of time as a distraction from the root cause and how to use even 30 minutes a month to get back into the saddle of your sex l
Bedroom Diaries - Managing Big Emotions During Sex
Send us Fan MailHave you ever had big feelings come up during sexy times - frustration, irritation, sadness, anger, annoyance? Those big emotions are often a sign that memories and traumas are coming up to be processed. Sometimes, in our sex lives post-kids, those memories can be the very thing blocking our desire to get into the bedroom in the first place. In this episode I walk you through how I
Why waiting for your sex drive to come back is the hard way to a fun flirty relationship after kids
Send us Fan MailIn this episode Sofia explores why so many women are just "waiting for their sex drive to come back online" to have a better sex life. She explores why this thinking is the hard way back to a fun and flirty relationship and what couples who have a thriving sex life after kids do instead. She shares dispatches from her bedroom to illustrate how tuning into intention instea
Overcoming Sexual Self-Consciousness: Reclaiming Your Inner Spectator
Send us Fan MailIn this episode of the 'Sex After Kids' podcast we explore the concept of 'spectatoring' during intimacy and the impact of societal expectations, particularly the male gaze, on sexual experiences. Sofia shares personal anecdotes and offers practical tips—reclaiming your inner critic as a cheerleader, curating a healthy media diet, and using mindfulness to drown
Sex Into your Sixties - Secrets for Success from Long Term Lovers - Sex After Kids Summit Sneak Peak Interview with Helen Rowlands - Holistic Sex Coach
Send us Fan MailToday I am sharing a bonus interview from the Sex After Kids Summit with Holistic Pleasure Coach Helen Rowlands. Helen is in her 60s and has been married for 45 years. I sat down with her to talk about she's living the best version of her relationship yet with more love and more satisfying sex than ever. We talk about her sexual renaissance in her 40s, understanding each other
5 Ways Shitty Sex Ed is Messing with Your Sex Life Post Kids
Send us Fan MailIn this episode of the 'Sex After Kids' podcast, Sofia delves into the significance of sex education and its lasting effects on adult sex lives, particularly after having children. The conversation covers several key points, including the failure of sex education to address pleasure, the importance of self pleasure, the need for detailed anatomical knowledge, and the impa
Creating the Positive Feedback Loop
Send us Fan MailIn this episode of the 'Sex After Kids' podcast, we discuss the importance of creating a positive feedback loop in your sex life. Sofia explains the concept of feedback loops and how positive sexual experiences can lead to more enjoyable and relaxed future encounters. Conversely, stress, trauma, and negative experiences can cause a negative feedback loop, making it diffic
The Four Secret Ingredients for a Fab Sex Life - After Kids
Send us Fan MailIn this episode of the Sex After Kids podcast, we explore the four secret ingredients essential for a fulfilling sex life post-parenthood. Listen in to find out what the nervous system, communication, your relationship to pleasure and your mindset have to do with reclaiming your sex life after kids. 00:00 Introduction to the Podcast00:37 Setting the Stage with 'Easy'07:24
Ditching the Great Sexpectations
Send us Fan MailToday we are talking all about Great Sexpectations - those sneaky "shoulds" that are killing the vibe in your post baby bedroom. Whether it's falling prey to gender traps (scripts about how he and she should behave in the bedroom), expecting everyone to be a five star sex god, or believing it's all for his pleasure - a better sex life is beyond what we think we
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