Honeydew Me
Honeydew Me is a podcast dedicated to helping all humans have great sex, feel good in their bodies, and find the confidence to embrace their most authentic selves. Emma & Cass strive to have honest, shame-free, and relatable conversations that help you in and outside the bedroom. We can't wait to hang!
Episodes
288. Just Between Us: Our (Unqualified) Secrets to a Thriving Sex Life & Relationship
Last week, a top couples therapist presented us with the research. This week it’s just us, no therapist in the room, trading what has actually worked in our own long-term relationships (and what has very much not). Cass gets into her current trying-list for keeping sex alive when she's tired, parenting, and has nothing left. Em gets into how she ruined sex for herself in past relationships wit
287. "Is My Sex Life Supposed to Feel Like This?" Zach Brittle on Long-Term Relationships, Scheduled Sex & What Actually Works
Zach Brittle is a Gottman-certified couples therapist in Seattle, host of Marriage Therapy Radio, and author of the upcoming book Nothing Changes If Nothing Changes. He's been happily married for 27 of 30 years (as in he GETS IT and has actually done the work) and has interviewed hundreds of couples, which means when he talks about relationships, he's not guessing. He joins Em and Cass for
286. Listener Confession: "I Fear I'll Never Truly Feel Sexy..."
One of you confessed: "I fear I'll never truly feel hot or sexy, and admitting that makes me feel even more lame." Em and Cass dive into why hotness feels like a make-or-break game we literally can't win: the impossible standards, the "hot girls are just born that way" myth, the way our attractiveness has been sold to us as our only real form of power, and why insecurity it
285. Honey Archive: Stop Feeling Behind: Comparison, Confidence & Self-Worth with Anna Kai
We’re digging into the Honey Archives to bring back one of our favorite conversations, and one we think everyone could use a little refresher on.Anna Kai, creator of Maybe Both and one of our favorite internet hype women, joins us for a brutally honest conversation about confidence, self-worth, comparison, and figuring out who the hell you are when life doesn’t look the way you thought it would.If
284. "Should I Just Burn It All Down?" Aja Vines on Trusting Your Gut, Pivoting Publicly & Why You Don't Need Permission
Aja Vines... intuitive guide, oracle reader, and self-appointed "rebirth doula" who has personally survived approximately 100 identity pivots and expects to survive 100 more before she leaves this earth. She joins Em and Cass for a shamelessly real conversation about big pivots. Together they unpack why leaving something without a backup plan is sometimes the most sane thing you can do, wh
283. Let's F*cking Date with Serena Kerrigan
Serena F*cking Kerrigan... your favorite creator and soon to be new favorite author of the upcoming book Let's F*cking Date. A dating bible for all our girlies who are currently in the "trenches" of the dating world and looking for a way to "become the prize, enjoy the ride, and never settle again." She joins Em and Cass for a ZERO BS breakdown of everything we're getting w
282. Just Between Us: Slamming Doors, Keeping Score & The Petty Shit We Do In Fights
A listener wrote in mortified: "I do stuff in fights with my boyfriend that I would be so embarrassed for my friends to find out about. Very petty shit. Bringing up things from years ago, silent treatment, crying to get my way. Am I just an immature bitch?" We dive in head first with our own worst fighting confessions, from slamming doors to walking away for attention. Spoiler: we've d
281. Just Between Us: Initiating Sex, Dropping Hints & Why Your Partner Isn't A Mind Reader
A listener wrote in, and she's pissed. She's been dropping spicy hints like nobody's business (wearing what he likes, flirty comments, changing with the door open), and her partner isn't picking up on any of them. She wants him to initiate. She wants to feel pursued. And yes, she knows she could just ask. Em and Cass get into how we all still want a mind-reader, the community polls
280. “Is It Normal to Still Feel Rejected in a Long-Term Relationship?” Alyssa Ljub on Rejection, Desire & Feeling Wanted
Alyssa Ljub is an intimacy and relationship expert who coaches dozens of couples a day in her role as a concierge at Arya. She joins Em and Cass to unpack the biggest hurdles couples hit when it comes to sex, why scheduling sex is FAR from unsexy, the difference between responsive and spontaneous desire, and the most common ways rejection shows up in long-term relationships.
Find Alyssa at @alyss
279. The Director of The Kinsey Institute on Modern Intimacy, Dating Apps & the Sex Recession
Dr. Justin Garcia is the Executive Director of the Kinsey Institute at Indiana University, chief scientific advisor to Match, and the author of the new book The Intimate Animal. He joins Em and Cass for a wide-ranging conversation on why modern intimacy feels so hard, and why he's optimistic about it anyway.
They get into the intimacy crisis (why we can be surrounded by people and still feel l
278. Just Between Us: Am I a Bad Friend for Being This Jealous?
A listener wrote in asking about a version of jealousy a lot of us are ashamed to admit: "I don't feel excited when good things happen to my friends anymore. Engagements, promotions, pregnancies, whatever. I fake it every time and feel like a monster." Em and Cass dive in head first with their own confessions, including the jealousy they've felt toward each other, which they've
277. Why Am I Never in the Mood Anymore? Brooke Bralove on Desire, Low Libido & ART Therapy
Brooke Bralove has spent 22 years as a sex therapist helping women figure out what's actually going on when desire disappears. Her take: your desire isn't broken or gone, it's just stuck. She joins Em and Cass to talk about why the sex we had at the beginning of a relationship isn't coming back (and why we need to grieve that), why "just try to be in the mood" is terrible a
276. Just Between Us: "I Can't Tell My Friends The Truth..."
We all want closer friendships, but too few of us are actually having the conversations that would get us there. This week Em and Cass answer a listener question about how to have hard conversations with friends, and get into the years they spent hiding things from each other: postpartum shame, a months-long sex-life crisis, feeling left out, feeling jealous, feeling like too much.
They read the c
275. Honey Archive: How to Fight Fair with Shrink Chicks
HOT RELATIONSHIP TIP: fighting isn’t a bad thing… but you do need to learn how to fight fair. Emmalee Bierly, LMFT and Jennifer Chaiken, LMFT of Shrink Chicks are back and this time they’re sharing their expert tips on how to fight. We cover:
-Why fighting is actually a part of a healthy relationship
-How to fight fair
-How to regulate your emotions during a fight
-Scripts for expressing your fee
274. 30-40% of Men Are Hiding Their Porn Use: Dr. Adi Jaffe on Addiction, Intimacy & Shame
Dr. Adi Jaffe has a PhD in psychology from UCLA, is a TEDx speaker, and founded IGNTD, a platform reframing how we talk about addiction, shame, and recovery. He joins Em and Cass for a wide-ranging conversation on addiction, mental health, and the skill nobody teaches us: how to sit with discomfort instead of running from it.
They get into what addiction actually is, why so many of us are quietly
273. Just Between Us: My Boyfriend Called Me High Maintenance In Front of His Friends
A listener's boyfriend called her high maintenance in front of his friends, and now she's second-guessing everything. Em and Cass are here to break it down and help her figure it out. They share the results of their (very amateur) research... because it turns out 60% of you have also been called high maintenance. They read your stories, come clean about their own, and get honest about the
272. The Cycle Syncing Lie: Laura Federico & Morgan Miller on Hormones, Ovulation & What Tracking Actually Looks Like
Laura Federico is a certified sex therapist. Morgan Miller is a certified professional midwife who runs a birth center in Maine. They've been friends since their early twenties and recently co-authored "The Cycle Book," a guide and tracking tool built to teach people about their hormones before they're in crisis. They join Em and Cass to talk about why most of us only learn about o
271. Just Between Us: Bathing Suit Anxiety, Cass' Nose Job & Historical Women That Men Hated
A listener wrote in about her upcoming girls' weekend. The rental has a hot tub, everyone's going to be in bikinis, and she's nervous about how she looks in a bathing suit. Em and Cass share their own experiences navigating this exact scenario, plus a few tips for managing the anxiety without limiting your damn life.
From there, Cass walks us all through her recent nose job: why she w
270. We Asked Our Resident Gyno Everything You're Afraid To ft. Dr. Maria Sophocles
You asked, our favorite gynecologist answered. We brought Dr. Maria Sophocles, a board-certified OB-GYN of 30 years, back on Honeydew Me to tackle the questions our community has been too nervous to ask their own doctors (which we COMPLETELY understand).
Before we got into your questions, she explained exactly why so many of us feel behind: most of us learned about sex from porn, a sibling, or a
269. The 7 Years of Sex You're Skipping: Anna Nickerson on Cherry, Mess-Free Period Sex & Pleasure
Anna Nickerson is the founder of Cherry, the first brand closing the gap between period care and pleasure. Their first product is a menstrual disc designed for completely mess-free period sex. She joins Cass and Emma to talk about why period sex is still taboo (and what we lose by avoiding it: roughly seven years of sex over a woman's lifetime), how to actually use a disc without panicking, th
268. Just Between Us: Blowing Up Your Life, Imposter Syndrome & Yoyo Dieting
Emma and Cass open with a listener question that hits a little too close to home: "I just turned 30 and I hate my job, my apartment, and the city I live in. Do I blow it all up or am I just having a moment?" Emma says blow it the f up. Cass, who spent a year deeply unhappy in her marriage, her motherhood, and her life in general, says try 5% better first. \
From there: Cass on the motherho
267. "I Joined a Sex Cult": Star Stone on Onetaste, Toxic Empowerment & Cult Culture
NYC-based comedian, actor, and storyteller Star Stone (@starstonespeaks) joins us to talk about the years she spent inside Onetaste, a Bay Area "sexual wellness" group that built a multi-million dollar operation around a 15-minute clitoris stroking practice and is now better known for being investigated by the FBI. Star takes us through the sex education gap that primed her for it, the rel
266. Welcome to 30, This Is Not What We Expected!!!!!
Cass turns 30 the day this episode drops, and this is the conversation we wish someone had handed us at 22. Not our Pinterest board versions of adulthood (there was too much turquoise and chevron on there anyway). The real one, where "adult money" gets spent on prenatal vitamins for thinning hair, a trampoline, and a personal finance book.
Emma found her old high school career class papers
265. The Lies We’re Sold About Motherhood & Maternal Instincts (And How They’re Hurting Us)
Motherhood is supposed to come naturally… right? That’s the story so many women are sold, and according to Dr. Sarah Oreck, it’s one of the biggest reasons us mommys are struggling in silence. In this episode, we're unpack the guilt, pressure, identity shifts, and impossible expectations placed on women during pregnancy, postpartum, and motherhood. From “maternal instincts” to breastfeeding sh
264. Honey Archive: How To Own Your Slut Era with Zachary Zane
Zachary Zane aka “The Boyslut” joins us for one of our most freeing conversations yet. Zach is a sex expert, advice columnist, and author known for his honest, no-BS takes on sexuality, shame, and modern dating. We’re talking about what it actually means to embrace your sexuality without shame, how to define pleasure on your own terms, and why the word “slut” might not mean what you think it does.
263. Q+A: "Is It Bad I Like Solo Sex Better Than Sex with My Partner?"
In this week's episode we're answering one of YOUR questions with a combination of expert tips and personal experience.
The Question: “Why do I enjoy sex more alone than with my boyfriend?”
What We Cover:
Why sex feels better alone than with your partner. Breaking down the very real (and very common) experience of enjoying solo sex more and why it doesn’t automatically mean somethin
262. Dirty Talk Tips for Beginners: What to Say Without Feeling Embarrassed
Dirty talk can feel… intimidating. What do you say? When do you say it? What if it comes out weird, awkward, or just not you? In this solo episode, we’re breaking down how to talk dirty in a way that actually feels natural, fun, and authentic to YOU.
We cover:
Why dirty talk feels so hard for so many people. How shame, pressure, and the idea of needing to “perform” can make it feel intimidati
261. How to Get the Sex You Actually Want
In this episode, we sit down with Dr. Tara, tenured professor, award-winning researcher, and author of the new book "How Do You Like It: A Guide For Getting What You Want (In Bed)," to talk about what it actually takes to have a satisfying, connected sex life. From communication to confidence to understanding what it is you like, this conversation breaks down the practical skills behind be
260. What No One Tells You About Labor and Delivery (From an OB-GYN)
In this episode, we’re sitting down with Dr. Jennifer Lincoln, OB-GYN and OB hospitalist, to talk about birth in the only way we know how... with a whole lot of honesty and oversharing. So many people go into labor thinking they know what to expect… and then everything feels confusing, fast, or completely different than what they had planned. We talk about what’s actually normal, how decisions get
259. Q+A: "Why Does Everyone Else Have a Better Sex Life Than Me?"
In this week's episode we're answering one of YOUR questions with a combination of expert tips and personal experience.
The Question: “All my friends talk about how amazing their sex lives are, and meanwhile my partner and I are struggling. It’s starting to make me feel like something is wrong with me or our relationship. We’ve been together a couple years… is it normal to have this many
258. Why Your Pelvic Floor Might Be the Missing Link to Better Sex
Pelvic floor health is one of the most overlooked parts of our bodies, and for many people with vulvas, it’s the missing link to better pleasure, stronger orgasms, and feeling more connected to their body.
This week, we’re joined by Jana Danielson, founder of Bloom Better, a longtime Pilates instructor, pelvic floor educator, and creator of the Cooch Ball, a pelvic floor fitness tool designed to h
257. How To Have A 20 Minute Orgasm with Susan Bratton
Vulvas and vaginas aren't complicated or mysterious, we've just never been properly taught how to pleasure them. Until now. In this episode, we’re joined by Susan Bratton, intimacy expert to millions, educator, and longtime advocate for pleasure-forward sex education. Together we break down the anatomy of female arousal, the full erectile tissue system in the vulva, and why so many people
256. The Invisible Labor of Being a Daughter & How It Shapes Our Relationships
Most of us spend our entire lives being someone’s daughter, but we rarely talk about what that role actually asks of us. In this episode, we’re joined by Dr. Allison Alford, a professor of communication at Baylor University and a leading researcher on “daughtering,” to unpack the expectations, emotional labor, and pressure many women carry in their families and how those dynamics can quietly shape
255. Q+A "How Do I Initiate Sex As Someone With Responsive Desire?"
In this week's episode we're answering one of YOUR questions with a combination of expert tips and personal experience.
The Question: "Is there a way for someone with responsive desire to initiate sex? Do you have any recommendations?"
What We Cover in This Episode:
• Can you initiate with responsive desire? Yes. Initiation does not have to mean you are ready for sex right away.
254. Honey Archive: "HELP! The Sex Is Bad..."
In this week’s Honey Archive episode we’re answering one of YOUR questions with a mix of expert insight, personal experience, and a very real conversation about what to do when the sex in your relationship just isn’t clicking. If you’ve ever loved someone but felt disconnected in the bedroom, this one’s for you.
The Question:“I’ve been with my boyfriend for a while now, and the sex… it’s just not
253. Why You Don’t Want Sex Like You Used To: Desire, Long-Term Relationships, & Life After Kids
For a lot of us, having kids absolutely wrecks our sex lives… at least for a while. And no one really prepares you for that. In this episode, we’re joined by Rebecca Howard Eudy, PhD, LMHC, an AASECT-certified sex therapist and couples therapist, to talk about what actually happens to desire, intimacy, and connection after kids (or even just in long term relationships). We dig into exhaustion, res
252. What Your Sex Life (and Erections) Can Tell You About Your Health
What if your sex life could tell you something important about your health? In this episode, we’re joined by Dr. Elliot Justin, an ER doctor of 25 years who pivoted into sexual health innovation to change the way we talk about bodies, pleasure, and well-being. We explore how erections, cardiovascular health, data-driven tools, and honest conversations can give us earlier insight into what’s happen
251. Q+A: "How Do I Prioritize Myself In a Relationship?"
In this week's episode we're answering one of YOUR questions with a combination of expert tips and personal experience.
The Question: "I’m 22 and in my first long-term relationship with a partner I truly love. Everything is healthy and supportive, but I’ve noticed I’ve started deferring to his routines and preferences instead of my own. I miss parts of myself, like how I used to spend
250. How To Become Shamelessly Sexy and Reconnect With Desire
Most of us were never actually taught how to understand our own sexuality. In this episode, we’re joined by Tash Doherty, author and sexuality advocate behind Misseducated, to talk about what it really means to become shamelessly sexy. We get into unlearning bad sex education, reconnecting with desire, and why curiosity, reflection, and self-knowledge are foundational to confidence and pleasure.
249. 50 Sex Tips To Rock Your World In 2026 (Pt. 2)
If sex in your long-term relationship feels expected, routine, or disconnected, you’re not alone. In Part 2 of our 50 best sex tips for 2026 series, we talk about desire, pressure, and how to build a more satisfying sex life that actually feels good.
This episode is about when sex starts to feel like something you’re doing because you’re supposed to. Going through the motions. Having sex because
248. 50 Sex Tips To Rock Your World In 2026 (Pt 1)
We’re kicking off the year with a two-part solo series where we share 50 of the best sex tips to help you build a more satisfying, confident, and connected sex life in 2026. This episode is about the foundations of intimacy. The things that actually change how sex feels over time. Desire. Confidence. Communication. Pleasure. And letting go of the belief that something is wrong with you.
In Part
247. Honey Archive: Come With Us To A Sex Club
To close out the year, we’re dipping into the Honey Archive and revisiting a fan-favorite episode. We went to a sex club as total first-timers and came back with an honest, behind-the-scenes breakdown of what it’s actually like, what surprised us, and what we wish we’d known before walking in.
If you’ve ever been curious, nervous, or just plain intrigued, this episode is your first step.
We cove
246. Why Sex Worker Rights Should Matter To Everyone
Sex worker rights aren’t a niche issue. They’re a human rights issue. In this episode, we’re joined by Kaytlin Bailey, stand-up comic, sex worker rights advocate, and expert on sex worker policy and history, to unpack why moral panics around sex work harm far more than just sex workers. We talk about power, policy, women’s autonomy, and why everyone, especially women who care about freedom, bodily
245. What’s Actually Happening When Sex Is Painful? (with a Pelvic Health PT)
Painful sex is common, but it’s not normal and it’s definitely not something you just have to live with. In this episode, we’re joined by Kristen Damery, a pelvic health physical therapist and the founder of Lava lube, to break down what’s actually happening in the body when sex hurts. We talk about muscles, nerves, lubrication, stress, and why so many people are dismissed or misunderstood when th
244. Q+A: " Do I Owe My Partner An Orgasm?"
In this week's episode we're answering one of YOUR questions with a combination of expert tips and personal experience.
The Question: "I'm a 35yo woman who’s been married to a really good guy for the last seven years. He never pressures me or anything, but every time I don’t want sex, I instantly feel like i’m being a shitty wife. I know that’s some leftover ‘good girl / keep you
243. How Chinese Medicine Can Transform Your Sex Life: Pain During Sex, ED Support & Pleasure Tips
Traditional Chinese medicine looks at your sex life very differently than Western medicine and honestly, it’s VERY refreshing. In this episode, we’re joined by Jaiming Ju, a 2nd-generation Chinese medicine practitioner and founder of Kun Health, to talk about how TCM understands libido, pain during sex, ED, arousal, and overall sexual wellbeing. We get into body patterns, energy balance, lifestyle
242. When Motherhood Breaks You Open: Postpartum OCD, Anxiety & Healing
In this week’s solo episode, we’re pulling back the curtain on our mental health journeys and talking about the parts we’ve never shared publicly. Cass opens up about what postpartum OCD and anxiety really looked like behind the scenes and Emma shares how her lifelong anxiety shaped the patterns she still works through today. From intrusive thoughts and panic spirals to the shame, the turning poin
241. How To Break Toxic Patterns & Reclaim Your Power In Bed
Most of us don’t realize we’re in a toxic pattern until we’re deep in it — choosing the same partners, having the same fights, or falling into the same role over and over again. In this episode, we sit down with Dr. Joy Berkheimer, psychotherapist and relationship expert, to talk about why these patterns feel so familiar, why they’re so hard to break, and how to finally choose something healthier.
240. Q+A: “Why Do I Rush My Pleasure And How Do I Stop?!”
In this week's episode we're answering one of YOUR questions with a combination of expert tips and personal experience.
The Question: "My question is about breaking a negative habit. My long-term boyfriend is wonderful, patient, and always makes sure I finish, but sometimes I find myself not wanting to have sex at all because I don’t feel like giving myself the time. It’s like, “ugh,
239. The Real Skills You Need For A Healthy Relationship
Good relationships don’t just happen. They’re built on self-awareness, communication, and the willingness to grow. In this episode, Jordanne Sculler, LMHC, shares how to build your own relationship toolkit and start showing up with more curiosity, accountability, and intention, both with yourself and the people around you.
We Cover:
How to build your own relationship toolkit. The emotional skills
238. What No One Tells You About Building Confidence in the Bedroom
We’re getting EXTRA personal. In this episode, we’re talking about our sexual journeys, from growing up with shame and silence to finding confidence, connection, and actual pleasure. No fluff, no fake empowerment, just real conversations about what shaped us, what we had to unlearn, and what finally helped us feel comfortable in our own skin.We cover:
How shame shaped our first experiences wi
237. Honey Archive: How To Live a Pleasured Life, Have Better Sex & Be Less Stressed
Pleasure isn’t a luxury, it’s a necessity. This week, we’re dipping into the archive and revisiting our episode with Danielle Savory, a certified sex and pleasure coach, mindfulness expert, and all-around powerhouse in helping people reconnect to their bodies and their desires. Together, we’re redefining what pleasure actually means, why it matters, and how to start prioritizing it in your daily l
236. You, Your Husband and His Mother: Navigating Complicated Mother-in-Law Relationships
Mother-in-law drama? You’re not imagining it, and you’re definitely not alone. This week, we’re joined by Dr. Tracy Dalgleish, a clinical psychologist, author, and relationship expert with over 15 years of experience helping couples communicate and connect better. Together, we unpack the emotional landmines that can show up when your partner’s mom is… a lot, and how to set boundaries that protect
235. The 5 Reasons You Aren’t Having Sex & Why Desire Doesn’t Even Matter
Struggling with mismatched desire or a dry spell that won’t end? You’re not broken, and neither is your relationship. This week, sex therapist Vanessa Marin, who has 20 years of experience in the field, and her husband Xander, a self-proclaimed “regular dude," reveal the five most common reasons couples stop having sex and explain why desire might not be the problem you think it is.
We cover:
234. Q+A : "Help! I've Never Had An Orgasm..."
In this week's episode we're answering one of YOUR questions with a combination of expert tips and personal experience.
The Question: “I’m 23 years old and have never had an orgasm. I have a wonderful boyfriend, whom I very much enjoy having sex with, but cannot finish, and have not been able to with the other people I’ve slept with. I also masturbate relatively frequently, and have trie
233. You Need To Be Rethinking Sex in Your 20s & 30s (So You Can Have Great Sex For The Rest Of Your Life)
Great sex doesn’t just happen, it’s something we build and nurture over time. This week, we’re joined by Dr. Maria Sophocles, a nationally recognized OB-GYN, menopause and sexual health expert, and fierce advocate for women’s pleasure. She’s here to talk about why rethinking sex in your 20s and 30s is the key to having great sex for life, how to close the “bedroom gap,” and why better sex educatio
232. Dirty Talk 101: Finding Your Voice In The Bedroom
Dirty talk can feel intimidating, but it doesn’t have to. This episode gives you a step-by-step guide to finding your voice, building confidence, and learning exactly what to say. Whether you want to explore a dominant, bratty, or praise-filled style, you’ll leave with practical tools, scripts, and a game plan to make dirty talk feel fun, natural, and hot.
We cover:
Why dirty talk feels hard a
231. How to Stop Being the “Good Girl”: End People-Pleasing, Perfectionism & Emotional Outsourcing
If your self-worth depends on being liked, playing the “good girl,” or keeping everyone else happy, you’re stuck in Emotional Outsourcing™. In this episode, our bestie Bea Albina, a UCSF-trained Family Nurse Practitioner, Master Certified Life Coach, and author of End Emotional Outsourcing™, is back and teaching us how to quit people-pleasing, perfectionism, and codependent habits FOR GOOD.
We co
230. Q+A: "How Do I Stop Feeling Ashamed Of My Sexual Fantasies?"
In this week's episode we're answering one of YOUR questions with a combination of expert tips and personal experience.
The Question: "Okay, so I’m really trying to work on my sex shame, and one thing I cannot get past is fantasizing. Like… every time I start, my brain is either like ‘this is unrealistic,’ ‘you should be embarrassed,’ or ‘lol you don’t even have a partner.’ How do I
229. Honey Archive: Stop Feeling Like Sh*t About Being Single with Shani Silver
Being single isn’t a waiting room and it’s definitely not a personal failure. This week, we’re diving into the archive and revisiting our episode with Shani Silver, writer, content creator, and author of A Single Revolution, to unpack the harmful narratives that keep single women stuck in shame, comparison, and “search mode.” Shani’s work challenges the idea that romantic partnership is the ultima
228. Rough Sex & Impact Play: How to Explore, Ask & Actually Enjoy It (Without The Shame or Awkwardness)
Curious about spanking, hair pulling, or a little consensual roughness... but not sure where to start? You're not alone. In this episode, we’re joined by Luna Matatas, a renowned Sex and Pleasure Educator known for her playful, trauma-informed approach to kink and impact play. With over 15 years of experience in the field, Luna walks us through how to explore rough sex in ways that feel hot, e
227. Sexual Fantasies 101: How to Find Yours, Build Them Out, and Turn Up the Heat
Your imagination might be the most powerful tool in your sex life and this episode will show you EXACTLY how to use it. We’re talking all things sexual fantasies—what they are, how to discover your desires, and creative ways to bring them to life. Whether you’re looking for fantasy roleplay ideas, inspiration for solo play, or ways to spice things up with a partner, this episode gives you the tool
226. The Truth About Sexual Confidence (and How to Get It)
What if sexual confidence had nothing to do with experience and everything to do with trusting yourself? With a background in sexual health research and a passion for pleasure-first education, Caitlin V Neal breaks down what sexual confidence really means and how to build it (even if you’re starting from zero). From quieting your inner critic to getting out of performance mode, Caitlin shares acti
225. Honey Archive: When Antidepressants Kill the Mood (and How to Get It Back)
If your sex drive tanked after starting antidepressants, you’re not alone and you’re definitely not broken. This week we’re dipping into the Honey Aerchive and revisiting our episode with Dr. Jordan Rullo, a Clinical Health Psychologist and Sex Therapist who specializes in sexual function.
Dr. Rullo explains how antidepressants impact desire, arousal, and orgasm, and what you can actually do to br
224. It’s Not Just You: Relationships Are Harder Than Ever—Here’s Why
Why do relationships feel so DAMN complicated these days? Modern love comes with sky-high expectations—partners are expected to be our best friend, therapist, co-parent, and soulmate all rolled into one. In this episode, Nicholas Velotta, Ph.D. student and Head of Research at Arya, shares why relationships feel harder today, what the science of intimacy has to tell us, and how building community (
223. Q+A: "We’re In A Sex Lull & He Won’t Initiate..."
In this week's episode we're answering one of YOUR questions with a combination of expert tips and personal experience.
The Question: “Hi there! Been a looooong time listener of the pod and have a question/need for advice. My fiancé and I have been together for almost 4 years, we’re in a super healthy relationship, and I feel very happy with him. The last few months or so, our sex life h
222. Why You Should Stop Pushing Through During Sex: Learning to Say No Without Apologizing
If you’ve ever had sex you didn’t really want to have— to avoid awkwardness, not hurt your partner's feelings or just get it over with—this episode is for you. We’re joined by Claire Perelman, a Queer, Jewish, AASECT Certified Sex Therapist based in the Bay Area who specializes in working with queer, poly, and kink communities.
Claire breaks down what it really means to “push through” during
221. Q+A: “I’m Not Over My First Breakup...”
In this week's episode we're answering one of YOUR questions with a combination of expert tips and personal experience.
The Question: "I’m in my mid-20s now, but I still feel like my breakup from high school is affecting the way I show up in relationships. Like… my attachment style, my trust issues, the way I react when someone pulls away. It all kind of traces back to that first hea
220. How To Actually Build Self-Trust and Finally Stop Second-Guessing Yourself
Self-trust isn’t just a cute idea, it’s the foundation for literally everything. This week we’re joined by Emily Romero, trauma therapist turned author and creator of The Self-Trust Model™, to talk about how to stop overthinking, start trusting your gut, and finally feel like you’ve got you. If people-pleasing, insecurity, or indecision have been running the show... this one’s for you.
We cover:
219. Q+A: "What Should I Do If My Boyfriend Doesn't Compliment Me?"
In this week's episode we're answering one of YOUR questions with a combination of expert tips and personal experience.
The Question: I’ve been with my partner for almost three years and I love everything about our relationship… except for the fact that he never compliments me. In the years we have dated he has never once told me I look pretty, hot, beautiful, nothing. I tell him often t
218. Mini Gameplans for Big Feelings: Exactly What to Do When You're Feeling Sad, Angry, Anxious—or Even Happy
Ever get hit with a wave of anxiety, sadness, or anger and think, “Cool, but what do I do with this?” This episode is your answer. We’re joined by somatic coach and nervous system expert Béa Victoria Albina, NP, MPH to talk about exactly what to do when big feelings show up (without spiraling, shutting down, or pretending you're fine). We’re talking mini, step-by-step action plans for managing
217. Romanticizing Your Single Era: How to Make It Your Best One Yet
Who decided being single has to be a pit stop on the way to something better? In this episode, we’re showing you how to make your single era the main event. Think solo date nights, orgasms (duh), reframing everything you thought you knew about singlehood, and building a life so good it turns heads. Being single isn’t a gap, it’s the glow-up.
What We Cover in This Episode:
Why singlehood isn’
216. How to Talk About Sex With Anyone: Hookups, Long-Term Relationships & Everything In Between
In this episode, we’re joined by Nicole Thompson, a sex and relationship psychotherapist and host of the Modern Anarchy Podcast. Nicole brings a trauma-informed, radically compassionate lens to the way we talk about sex, relationships, and desire. Together, we explore how shame holds us back from pleasure and how we can start speaking up, owning what we want, and creating the kinds of connections
215. Q+A: "Why Does It Take Me So Long To Get Turned On?"
In this week's episode we're answering one of YOUR questions with a combination of expert tips and personal experience.
The Question: "I'm in a really loving and supportive relationship and I want to have sex. Like, I mentally want it—I’m attracted to my partner, I crave intimacy, I feel emotionally connected… but it still takes me a long time to feel fully turned on physically.
214. What No One Tells You About Sex After Kids: How To Rebuild Intimacy, Reclaim Your Sexual Confidence & Be The Same Slut You Were Before
We sat down with Susanna Brisk, Sexual Intuitive®️ and certified sex educator who's been helping individuals and couples for nearly a decade reignite their sexual spark. We're diving deep into what really happens to sex and intimacy after having kids, exploring how parenthood can reshape desire and sharing practical tools to reclaim your slutty self. We cover:
How to reignite sexual co
213. Sex, Intimacy & Relationships While Pregnant + Postpartum
This week we're diving into all things intimacy while pregnant and postpartum. Cass is answering listener questions about her experience navigating sex and relationships as a new mom. We cover:
WTF a mucus plug is
How Cass navigated body changes while pregnant and postpartum and a PSA on stretch marks
Normalizing postpartum vaginas
How Cass navigated sex and intimacy while pregnant
212. Q +A: "Does Penis Size REALLY Matter?"
In this week's episode we're answering one of YOUR questions with a combination of expert tips, personal experience, and a bunch of research.
The Question: "I think my penis might be too big for comfortable penetrative sex with my girlfriend. We’ve had open conversations about it and she’s super reassuring, but I still end up feeling guilty, like my body is somehow making things harde
211. When the Sex Fizzles: Rekindling Passion in Long-Term Relationships
You know when you're in a long term relationship and the sex just gets a little... meh? Maybe it's feeling routine, lacking spice, or just isn't hitting how it used to. That's why we're chatting up Dr. Diane Mueller, a board-certified sexologist with a game plan to get your sex life back on track. We cover:
The science behind why passion ebbs and flows over the course of a long
210. What Is a Normal Libido? Understanding Sex Drive Differences In Relationships
We're joined once again by the LOVELY Susan Morgan Taylor, MA a somatic sex therapist and relationship coach, but this time we're diving headfirst into LIBIDO. We cover:
What a normal libido looks like & how we define low vs. high libido
Common myths and misconceptions about having a low libido
How to navigate sex drive differences within a relationship
The importance of the 3 N's:
209. Honey Archive: Entitled & Indulgent Foreplay
We're revisiting the juiciest lesson on foreplay and initiation with none other than Haylin Belay. Haylin is a sexual health educator, bodyworker, and pleasure witch who is ready to CHANGE YOUR DAMN LIFE.We cover:
Expanding your definition of foreplay
How to turn yourself ON
Understanding the phases of sexual arousal and USING that to your advantage
How to feel ENTITLED to your needs
How to ma
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