Dating Déjà vu
Dating Déjà vu is a relationship podcast hosted by Christina Hathaway, a licensed marriage and family therapist. She explores the complexities of relationships and personal growth, offering practical insights on communication, intimacy, family dynamics, and self-discovery. Each episode provides heartfelt discussions and expert advice for anyone navigating marriage, friendships, or their relationship with themselves.
Episodes
5 Simple Ways to Improve Your Relationship and Create More Connection
What if a better relationship doesn’t require a bigger date night, an expensive gift, or a grand romantic gesture?Sometimes, the biggest changes come from the smallest things we consistently do.In this episode of Dating Deja Vu, Christina Hathaway, LMFT, shares 5 simple ways to strengthen your relationship, improve emotional connection, and create a healthier partnership. From noticing what your p
5 Signs You’re With the Wrong Person (Even If They’re a Good Person)
What if the person you’re with isn’t a bad person, they’re just not the right person for you?Not every relationship ends because of cheating, abuse, betrayal, or some obvious red flag. Sometimes, the signs are much quieter. You simply start feeling different. Quality time feels like work. You walk on eggshells. You become a smaller version of yourself. You fall in love with someone’s potential ins
The Real Third Wheel in Your Relationship? Your Body Image.
What if the biggest obstacle to intimacy isn't your partner but the way you see yourself?In this episode of Dating Deja Vu, Christina Hathaway explores how negative body image quietly impacts every stage of your love life, from avoiding dating apps to pushing away a loving spouse. Whether you've been married for years, are navigating the dating scene, or have convinced yourself you'll
The Person You're Chasing Is Blocking the One Who Would Choose You
How many chances is too many?A single moment from Love Island sparked a conversation every person who's ever stayed too long in the wrong relationship needs to hear:"Why are you giving him a second and third chance when there are so many others waiting for their first?"In this episode of Dating Déjà Vu, Christina Hathaway explores why we keep returning to emotionally unavailable part
Part 1 | Privacy and Secrecy In relationships: What We Can Learn From Nia and Danny of The Valley
Is it privacy... or secrecy?When someone says, "I know his heart," are they extending grace or ignoring their own experience?In this episode of Dating Deja Vu, Christina Hathaway unpacks one of the most talked-about storylines from The Valley, using Danny and Nia Booko's relationship to explore deeper patterns that show up in real relationships every day. The conversation explores th
Sunk Cost in Love: What Aniya & Melanie Get Wrong | Love Island S8
Two women on Love Island USA Season 8 stayed loyal through Casa Amor and still got blindsided. This episode breaks down why.Therapist and host Christina Hathaway uses Aniya & KC and Melanie & Sincere to unpack the sunk cost trap, why we give chance after chance, and why the green-flag guy felt boring when the chaos felt like a spark. Reality TV on the surface, real relationship psychology
Anxious, Avoidant, or Secure? Understanding Attachment Styles in Relationships
Do you believe you're "just an anxious attachment" or "that's just how avoidants are"?In this episode of Dating Deja Vu, we unpack one of the biggest misconceptions about attachment styles: they're not your identity, they're learned survival strategies.If you've ever found yourself attracting emotionally unavailable partners, fearing abandonment, pulling awa
Are You a Pick Me? The Hidden Reasons You Keep Losing Yourself in Relationships
Have you ever looked back at a relationship and wondered, "When did I stop being me?"In this episode of Dating Deja Vu, Christina breaks down what "pick me" behavior actually is and why it's so much deeper than an internet insult. Instead of shame, she offers a compassionate look at how childhood experiences, codependency, and low self-esteem can lead us to seek validation
If You Muted Your Partner, What Would Their Actions Say?
What if your partner couldn't text you, call you, make promises, or tell you how much they care?Would their actions alone make you feel loved, secure, and chosen?In this episode of Dating Deja Vu, Christina explores a powerful question that can instantly bring clarity to relationships, situationships, and everything in between: If you muted your partner and could only pay attention to their ac
When Sex Leaves the Building: Rebuilding Desire in Long-Term Relationships
When was the last time you had sex with your partner?It's one of the most searched relationship questions online, and one of the least discussed. If you've ever wondered whether your relationship is normal, worried that the spark has disappeared, or felt disconnected from your partner, this episode is for you.In this special crossover episode of The Mindset Mirror Connection and Dating Déj
5 Mindset Shifts That Will Transform Your First Dates
Do your first dates feel more like auditions than genuine connections?In this episode of Dating Deja Vu, Christina Hathaway breaks down the five mindset shifts that can completely change the way you approach dating. Instead of obsessing over whether someone likes you, you'll learn how to stay present, trust yourself, and determine whether they're actually a good fit for you.If you've e
Are You The Partner You Want To Have? The Mirror Principle in Dating
Emotionally available. Consistent. Communicative. Present. Mature.But here’s the uncomfortable question this episode asks:Are you showing up as the partner you say you want?In this raw and honest solo episode of Dating Deja Vu, we dive into the “mirror principle”. It's the idea that the patterns showing up in your relationships may be reflecting unresolved patterns within yourself.This convers
Megan Thee Stallion, Situationships & The Accountability Crisis
In this episode of Dating Deja Vu, Christina breaks down the cultural double standards that normalize harmful behavior in modern relationships and why women are often labeled “crazy,” “bitter,” or “difficult” for simply telling the truth.Using the recent public breakup between Megan Thee Stallion and Klay Thompson as a starting point, Christina explores what real accountability actually looks like
Are You Actually Ready For A Relationship?
You say you want a relationship… but have you ever stopped to ask if you’re actually ready for one?In this episode, Christina breaks down the uncomfortable truth most people avoid: wanting love and having the capacity for it are two very different things. If you keep finding yourself in the same dating patterns, feeling frustrated, or attracting the “wrong” people, this conversation will challenge
The West Wilson Effect: Relationship Ambiguity & the Situationship Trap
We’re back and we’re starting Season 2 with chaos, clarity, and a case study you cannot ignore.In this episode, we break down the viral mess unfolding on Summer House featuring West Wilson, Ciara Miller, Amanda Batula, and Kyle Cooke and why it’s the perfect example of relationship ambiguity in action.If you’ve ever been in a “situationship,” felt confused about where you stand, or stayed longer t
46 | 10 Shifts to Transform Your Relationship
If your relationship feels stuck or your love life is on autopilot, this episode is your reset button. Christina walks you through 10 small but powerful relationship microshifts that can bring big results—fast.Whether you're dating, committed, or married, these simple yet science-backed strategies will help you:🩵 Feel more connected🩵 Communicate more clearly🩵 Build trust🩵 And bring emotional s
45 | All or Nothing Thinking: How Perfectionism is Ruining Your Dating Life
Is your dating life stuck in a cycle of extreme highs and sudden ghosting? You might be trapped in all or nothing thinking. In this episode of Dating Déjà Vu, Christina unpacks the dangers of black-and-white thinking in modern dating and how it sabotages real connection.If you're constantly looking for red flags, obsessed with instant chemistry, or walking away too quickly when things aren’t p
44 | In-To-Me-You-See: Healthy Intimacy in Dating + Relationships
Being vulnerable in a healthy relationship can feel unsafe—especially if you've been burned before. But vulnerability is the key to building real emotional intimacy and connection. In this episode, Christina Hathaway, licensed marriage and family therapist, breaks down what healthy vulnerability actually looks like, why it’s not oversharing or trauma dumping, and how to express your truth with
43 | 10 Subtle Signs It’s Time to Leave a Relationship (Even If Nothing “Bad” Happened)
Are you constantly questioning your relationship, but can't quite explain why?In this episode, Christina breaks down 10 subtle yet powerful signs it's time to leave a relationship—even if there hasn’t been a dramatic breakup, betrayal, or obvious red flag. If you're stuck in confusion, this episode will give you the clarity—and permission—you need!Let's connect:Schedule a clarity c
42 | Fantasy vs. Reality: What Love Island’s Olandria Teaches Us About Dating Patterns
Are you dating someone’s potential... or just their cowboy boots? In this spicy Love Island deep dive, Christina breaks down what Olandria’s journey teaches us about fantasy, red flags, and why holding on too long can cost us our peace.In this week's episode, Christina dissects the latest drama on Love Island USA—specifically the emotional rollercoaster between Olandria, Taylor, and Clark, and
41 | Are You Changing for Them—Or Changing for You?
In this episode, Christina unpacks the subtle (and not-so-subtle) ways we change ourselves to be loved, wanted, or accepted. Are you healing and growing because you want to or are you unconsciously shifting to become more palatable for your partner?She dives into the difference between self-evolution and self-abandonment, explains the psychology behind shape-shifting in dating, and offers powerful
40 | Love Island’s Huda & Jeremiah: Fantasy, Manipulation, and Modern Dating Red Flags
Love Island fans, let's talk!In this episode of Dating Déjà Vu, Christina dives deep into the messy (and frankly, uncomfortable) dynamic between Huda and Jeremiah from Love Island USA. Christina dissects what love addiction looks like in real-time, the psychological games at play, and how emotional manipulation, insecurity, and trauma bonding can destroy even the most passionate connections.Wh
39 | Roommates or Romantic Partners? The Hidden Loneliness in Long-Term Love
Is your relationship starting to feel more like cohabitating than connecting? In this episode of Dating Deja Vu, therapist and relationship expert Christina Hathaway dives deep into the quiet crisis so many couples face: the shift from romantic partners to roommates. She breaks down why this happens, how to spot the signs of hidden loneliness in your relationship, and most importantly—what to do a
38 | How to Survive a Breakup (When You're Strong, Smart, and Still Shattered)
In this episode, Christina gets brutally honest about what it actually takes to move on after a breakup without ghosting your feelings or glamorizing your ex. From the grief of “the future that never happened” to the shame spiral of the inner critic, Christina breaks down the real psychology behind heartbreak and why feeling your emotions is the most radical thing you can do.Whether you’re fresh o
37 | Love Languages in 2025: Updated, Upgraded, and Way More Honest
Is your love language still stuck in the 90s?In this episode, Christina breaks down the five original love languages and gives them the 2025 upgrade they desperately needed.We’re talking less about flowers and sweet texts, and more about safety, consent, intentionality, and presence. Christina shares personal stories and real-life examples to help you recognize how these love languages show up in
36 | Your Family Role is Blocking Your Love Life
Could the role you played in your family growing up be sabotaging your relationships today?In today’s episode, Christina unpacks the hidden dynamics of family roles—those subconscious identities many of us assume in childhood to navigate dysfunction. These roles might’ve once helped us survive, but they often sabotage our adult relationships and self-worth.Whether you’re navigating healing, parent
35 | When the Dating Coach Makes It Worse: Signs You’re in the Wrong Therapy Room
Not all therapy is created equal, especially when it comes to love, dating, and relationships. In this episode, Christina explores the most important red flags to watch for in dating and relationship therapists so you can protect your emotional well-being and get the support you deserve.Whether you're navigating a breakup, building better relationship patterns, or healing from past trauma, you
34 | Rebound or Reset? What Your Post-Breakup Pattern Says About You
Is your new relationship post-breakup helping you heal—or hiding your hurt?In this episode, Christina dives deep into one of the most common (and confusing) post-breakup questions: is this new partner a rebound or a reset?Whether you're dating for healing, distraction, or connection, your post-breakup decisions shape your future relationships. Christina helps you reflect on your emotional read
33 | Dating While Ambitious: Can You Be Feminine and Driven?
Can you be career-driven and still embody femininity in relationships? In this episode, Christina dives deep into the double bind faced by high-achieving women in the dating world. She unpacks how ambition, control, and performance can sabotage romantic connections, and how embracing softness doesn’t mean sacrificing power.This episode is a must-listen for all the ambitious, goal-oriented women wh
32 | What Actually Is Gaslighting and Narcissism?
Are they gaslighting you or are you just misusing the term?In this episode, Christina breaks down two of the most misunderstood (and overused) buzzwords in modern dating: gaslighting and narcissism. With compassion and clarity, she explains how labeling every ex or situationship with these terms can be damaging. Not just to them, but to your own healing.Let's connect:Schedule a clarity call with m
31 | More Access, Less Intimacy: The Real Cost of Hookup Culture
In this episode, Christina dives deep into the complex world of hookup culture, exposing the emotional toll behind the promise of "no strings attached" encounters.Episode highlights:🩵 Why casual sex might be leaving you feeling emptier than empowered🩵 How early exposure to sex can distort your relationship expectations🩵 The critical difference between being desired and being truly seenLet's connec
30 | The One Thing That Keeps a Relationship Going
What really keeps a relationship strong? Spoiler: It’s not vacations, proposals, or grand romantic gestures. In this episode, Christina reveals the one thing that research shows sustains love in the long run: bids for connection.Listen now to learn what it means and how to recognize and respond to these small but powerful interactions that build lasting intimacy—and how ignoring them might be quie
29 | Conditional vs Unconditional Love in Modern Dating
Let's dive deep into the subtle yet powerful ways conditional love shows up in modern dating and how it may be sabotaging your relationships without you even knowing it. From “perfect girl” syndrome to confusing anxiety with chemistry, she breaks down how many of us learned early on that love must be earned, and how that belief plays out on Bumble, in our DMs, and even in long-term partnership
28 | The Silent Drift: When You Start Withholding Sex, Affection, or Truth
Have you ever been in a relationship that looked great on the outside—but felt empty on the inside?In this episode, Christina dives into the quiet emotional detachment that happens long before a breakup. She explores why people start withholding sex, affection, or even updates about their lives—not as a form of punishment, but as a protective response when emotional needs are repeatedly unmet.Usin
27 | Manifesting a Partner vs. Chasing a Pattern
Let's dive into the psychology and spirituality of manifestation. But this isn’t your typical “script it and sip your green juice” advice. Christina blends therapeutic insight with real-life strategies for healing your nervous system, rewiring your beliefs, and becoming emotionally available to yourself first. Whether you're tired of breadcrumbing, ghosting, or repeating dating patterns, t
26 | The Dream Girl Wound
Ever been praised for being “the total package”— beautiful, successful, easygoing—only to be ghosted the moment you show emotion or vulnerability? In this powerful episode, Christina Hathaway, marriage and family therapist and dating expert, breaks down the Dream Girl Wound— the pattern where high-achieving women are idolized for being perfect but abandoned when they act human.If you’ve felt like
25 | Are You Really Ready to Date?
Before you redownload dating apps or—worse—text your ex, ask yourself the question most people skip: "Am I truly ready to date again?"In this episode, we're going to talk about the often-ignored signs you're not ready to date—and what real readiness actually looks like. This isn't about blaming or shaming. It's about protecting your peace, rebuilding your foundation, and
24 | The Real Reason He Won’t Commit (And What Whole-Value Women Do Differently)
In this no-fluff, truth-bomb-packed episode, Christina dives into why some women keep attracting emotionally unavailable men and what it actually means to be a high-value woman.If you’ve ever been ghosted, breadcrumbed, or left wondering why he won’t commit, this one’s for you. Christina unpacks the difference between the “pick me” mindset and the self-rooted, magnetic energy of a whole-value woma
23 | Perfect Compatibility Doesn’t Exist: Here’s What Does!
Is “perfect compatibility” keeping you single? In this episode, Christina dives into the myth of the "perfect partner" and why chasing a fantasy version of love may be sabotaging your chances of real connection.Christina shares personal stories, client examples, and professional insight to help you shift your mindset from unrealistic expectations to meaningful compatibility. Whether you're hypercr
22 | What If You’re the Problem in Your Relationships?
Let's talk about the unconscious patterns that might be sabotaging your relationships in today's episode. It’s not about shame, it’s about ownership. From unspoken expectations to emotional hijacking and trauma-driven “gut feelings,” Christina walks you through the real reasons love might keep slipping through your fingers, and how to finally break the cycle.If you’ve ever said “they just
21 | It’s Not About the Dishes! It’s About What’s Been Left Unsaid
Have you ever found yourself mid-fight about something small like the dishes, the thermostat, or a passing tone... wondering, how did we even get here?In this raw and revealing episode of Dating Déjà Vu, Christina breaks down the REAL reason you keep looping through the same arguments. Spoiler: it’s not about the damn dishes.We’re talking:Why your emotional cup is already full and what’s really sp
20 | Green Flags That Don’t Give You Butterflies (But Should)
In today’s episode, we’re flipping the script, we’re not talking about red flags. We’re talking GREEN FLAGS! The subtle, powerful signs of emotional safety, regulation, and genuine connection that most people overlook in favor of sparkly chaos. (Yes, chaos and chemistry are not the same thing.)This episode will have you rethinking every “boring” date you ever ghosted. Because real love isn’t about
19 | Why People Cheat (It’s Not Always About Sex)
You’ve heard the clichés: “Once a cheater, always a cheater” or “They just wanted sex.” But what if that’s not the full story?In this episode, Christina goes deep into the real reasons people cheat—from unresolved trauma and emotional neglect to ego crises, conflict avoidance, and unmet needs. Whether you’ve been betrayed, have cheated, or simply want to understand infidelity through a more human
18 | Self-Sabotage Disguised as Standards: Are Your Boundaries Actually Walls?
You say you have high standards. But is it really self-respect or self-sabotage in disguise?In this episode, you’ll learn how to tell the difference between standards that protect your peace and walls that block your connection. Christina dives into the origin of emotional walls, how hyper-independence masks emotional wounds, and how to open up to love without losing yourself.If you're constantly
17 | When Love Feels Like a Project: The Fixer Relationship Trap
Are you falling for potential instead of choosing a partner who’s ready to show up for love today?In this episode, Christina breaks down the hidden truth behind dating "fixer uppers." From childhood caretaking roles to modern-day overfunctioning, she reveals why some of us feel most alive in relationships where we are needed... but not necessarily valued.You’ll learn:✨ Why chemistry some
16 | Love Is Blind Season 8 Recap From a Licensed Therapist
If you're addicted to Love Is Blind and love dissecting dating dynamics through a therapist’s lens, this episode is for you.Christina Hathaway, licensed marriage and family therapist, is diving deep into the Minnesota edition of Love Is Blind Season 8—unpacking emotional red flags, toxic family ties, communication breakdowns, and the difference between compatibility and true connection.From Sarah
15 | Boundaries in Online Dating: Stop Wasting Time on Emotionally Unavailable People
If you’re tired of ghosting, breadcrumbing, or wasting your weekends on lackluster dates, this episode is your wake-up call!Dating and relationship expert, Christina Hathaway, shares the exact boundary-setting strategy (the viral “3x3x3x3 Rule”) to help you date smarter, stop attracting emotionally unavailable partners, and protect your time, energy, and heart.In this episode, you'll learn how
14 | Sabotaging Love: Am I the Problem?
Do you find yourself pushing people away just when things start to feel real? Do you pick fights, ghost, or suddenly lose interest? If so, you might be caught in the cycle of self-sabotage when it comes to love.In this episode, Christina breaks down why we sabotage relationships, from fear of abandonment to hyper-independence, low self-worth, and even addiction to the chase. She helps you recogniz
13 | Saying 'I Love You': Words vs. Actions in Relationships
Saying "I love you" is easy, but does it truly land? In this episode, Christina explores how love is communicated through words and actions, shares her personal experience of waiting a year to hear those three little words from her now-husband, and offers insight into recognizing love even when it’s not spoken aloud.She breaks down the importance of love languages, how to know if someone truly lov
12 | Dating Deja VIEW: Love Bombing, Avoidance, & Red Flags in Reality TV
In this DeJa View episode, we're diving into the relationship dynamics of your favorite reality TV couples. From Shep and Sienna (Southern Charm) to Joe Bradley and Maddi Reese (Southern Hospitality) and Jesse Solomon and Lexi (Summer House), we're breaking down the love addict/love avoidant cycles, boundary issues, and the patterns that keep people stuck in unhealthy relationships.Ever fe
11 | Dating Rules We Need to Retire in 2025
Let's talk about the outdated dating rules we need to leave behind! From “the guy should always text first” to “playing hard to get actually works,” Christina unpacks where these tropes come from, why they’re problematic, and whether they deserve a spot in modern dating.Are opposites really the key to lasting love? Does jealousy mean someone actually cares? Christina challenges these old-schoo
10 | Getting Over the Toxic Ex!
Why is it so hard to move on from a toxic ex?! From emotional addiction and trauma bonding to the justifications we tell ourselves, Christina unpacks the hidden forces keeping you stuck and gives you actionable strategies to break free.If you're ready to stop the emotional yo-yo and attract the love you truly deserve, this episode is for you!Let's connect:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/datin
09 | She Loves Me, He Runs Away: The Push-Pull Cycle In Relationships
Have you ever wondered why you keep ending up in the same kind of relationships—one person craving closeness, the other pulling away? It’s not just bad luck—it’s a cycle.In this episode, I’m breaking down the Love Addict & Love Avoidant cycle—a dynamic that explains why some people chase love while others run from it. Based on Pia Mellody’s post-induction therapy model, this framework will blo
08 | Dating DeJaVIEW: Reality TV, Relationship Patterns & The Kyle & Mauricio Split
Welcome to the very first Dating DejaVIEW episode! In this series, host Christina Hathaway dives into the relationship dynamics of reality TV couples—analyzing attachment styles, emotional patterns, and the psychology behind love, heartbreak, and everything in between.In this episode, Christina takes a deep dive into:✨ Mauricio and Kyle’s separation—what went wrong?✨ Lindsay and Carl’s whirlwind r
07 | Green Flags Mean GO!
We're flipping the script! While red flags get all the attention, today we’re focusing on the green ones—the signs of a strong, stable, and fulfilling relationship. From emotional safety and consistency to healthy communication and genuine investment, we break down the key traits that make love last. If healthy relationships have ever felt "boring" or unfamiliar, this episode will he
06 | The 4 Signs Your Relationship Will FAIL
In this episode, we're diving into the four toxic behaviors that can predict relationship failure with 90% accuracy. Known as the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, these behaviors can slowly break down trust, intimacy, and emotional safety in a relationship.Whether you're dating or in a long-term relationship, this episode will give you actionable strategies to improve communication, resolv
05 | No Date, No Problem: How to Actually Enjoy Valentine’s Day When You’re Single
Love is in the air… but you don’t need a relationship to breathe it in.Happy (early) Valentine’s Day! Whether you’re single, in a situationship, or just figuring things out, today doesn’t have to be a day of dread. In this episode, we’re talking about how to reframe the day from being “Singles Awareness Day” to a celebration of love in all its forms—self-love, friendships, family, and even your pe
04 | Valentine’s Day Sanity Guide for Singles: Avoid the Spiral!
Valentine’s Day is almost here, and if you’re single, you might be tempted to fall into the same old traps—doom scrolling, texting your ex, or making last-minute desperate dating decisions. But not this year!In this episode, we'll walk you through self-sabotaging behaviors, toxic relationship nostalgia, and why social media comparison is not the move. Whether you're embracing solo plans or finding
03 | Finance, 6'5, Blue Eyes: Why You Have a Type
Do you date a type? In today's episode, we're talking about why you keep falling for the same kind of person, what’s driving those attractions, and how to break the cycle. If your relationships feel like reruns, it’s time to ask: is it fate, bad luck… or is it you? Tune in now!Let's connect:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/datingdejavupod/
02 | Ghosting, Breadcrumbing, and Love-Bombing: Oh My!!!
If you've ever experienced the heartache of someone disappearing without a word, been strung along with false hope, or been swept up in an intense but short-lived romance, this episode is for you. We're breaking down what these terms really mean, how to spot them, and most importantly, how to protect yourself from falling victim to them. Join me as we navigate the complexities of modern re
01 | Calling You Out: 10 Biggest Dating Patterns That Keep You Stuck
For our first full episode, join Christina as she breaks down the 10 biggest dating patterns that keep you choosing the wrong person—again and again. No sugarcoating, just straight talk. So, is it them, or is it you?
If you're ready to break the cycle and finally rewrite your love story, let’s get into it!
Let's connect:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/datingdejavupod/
It might be déjà vu, but it also might be you!
Are you stuck in a dating loop, always attracting the same type of partner—bad boys, emotionally unavailable women, or just plain chaos? Dating Déjà Vu is here to help you break the cycle.
Hosted by Christina Hathaway, a marriage and family therapist and relationship expert, this podcast dives deep into the patterns that keep you stuck, the psychology behind attraction, and how to finally rewrite
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