Lonely at the Top
A podcast for high-level leaders who feel isolated by the weight of their responsibilities. Hosted by psychologist and Soul Medic Rachel Alexandria, it explores the emotional costs of leadership, including pressure, doubt, and fatigue. Episodes offer guidance, emotional tools, and conversations with experienced leaders who have navigated the burdens of decision-making without losing themselves.
Episodes
Letting Go of the Good Girl Conditioning with Teresa Low
Teresa Low is a former CMO with 25-plus years leading global brands and teams, including Hershey's, Beam Suntory, and Courvoisier. Originally from Singapore, Teresa spent three decades climbing the corporate ladder in the U.S. before stepping away to become an executive coach. She now helps high-performing women leaders articulate who they are, own their value, and be seen in the right li
Leaving Corporate to Find Self-Compassion with Fernanda Brasileiro
Fernanda Brasileiro spent 20 years in global operations leadership, working in corporate supply chain planning for companies like Krispy Kreme, and serving major clients including McDonald's, Starbucks, and Chick-fil-A. After leaving her full-time corporate role, Fernanda now offers consulting, workshop facilitation, and coaching for supply chain analytics and leadership development.This
Finding Happiness in the Middle of a Toxic Workplace with Ricky Powell
Ricky Powell is a Happiness Architect, executive happiness coach, and culture transformation strategist who spent 25 years inside NBC Universal, including nine years working under a supervisor whose behavior left him questioning who he could trust. Behind his successful corporate career, Ricky faced workplace toxicity, betrayal, isolation, and the pressure of protecting his career while n
Decolonizing Power and Finding ALOHA with Dr. Gerry Ebalaroza-Tunnell
Dr. Gerry Ebalaroza-Tunnell is a native Hawaiian scholar, wayfinder, oral historian, and founder of Co3, Co-Creating Cohesive Communities. Grounded in ALOHA and guided by purpose, she helps leaders and communities navigate complexity while honoring people, place, culture, and relationships. But behind her accomplishments and years of leadership, Dr. Gerry has also faced isolation, imposte
Leading in Public Health Through COVID with Shivani Mehta Bhatia
Shivani Mehta Bhatia has spent her career helping leaders navigate conflict, power, and organizational change. A facilitator, advisor, and writer, she works with senior leaders, particularly women of color, queer leaders, and mission-driven organizations, to transform conflict into insight, strengthen relationships, and build healthier organizations. Drawing on her background in public he
Leadership & Vulnerability: When to Share and When to Stay Silent
Vulnerability is often praised as one of the most important qualities of effective leadership, but timing matters. Sharing too much too soon can create confusion, erode confidence, and make it harder to navigate challenges, while never opening up at all can leave leaders feeling disconnected and isolated.In this solo episode, host and executive coach Rachel Alexandria reflects on the less
Leading Through Criticism and Mental Health Challenges with Sebastian Martinez
Sebastian Martinez has dedicated his career to serving communities through advocacy, art, and leadership. As the Executive Director and CEO of Culture Shock San Diego and Deputy Executive Director of Community Advocates for Just and Moral Governance, he has spent years building spaces where people can thrive. But when public criticism, cyberbullying, and the pressures of leadership collid
How Do I Know What the Right Choice Is
When you’re searching for direction, rather than seeking outside guidance or reading other people's advice books, sometimes what you need is to slow down, listen deeply, and learn the language of your own inner guidance. In this solo episode, host and Soul Medic Rachel Alexandria explores what it's like to trust yourself, especially when you’ve been conditioned not to. Drawing from her wo
Integrity and Consent in Leading Communities with Mark Silver
After decades of building a values-driven business and guiding spiritually centered entrepreneurs, Mark Silver has come to see leadership as a practice of deep listening, consent, and integrity.This episode of Lonely at the Top explores leadership defined by relationship, accountability, and alignment with Something Greater.What does it really means to lead in a world shaped by disconnect
Balancing Confidence and Humility as a Surgeon with Dr. Pamela Lee
Dr. Pamela Lee has spent her career making life-or-death decisions in the operating room while carrying the pressure that comes with being one of the few women leading in surgery. As a colorectal surgeon, robotic surgery specialist, and Chair of Surgery at both Sharp Memorial Hospital and Sharp Reese Stealy Medical Group, Pamela operates in environments where mistakes carry enormous weigh
Finding Identity Beyond Success with Marguerite Martin
After spending more than two decades in real estate, Marguerite Martin never expected her work would force her to confront difficult questions about community, power, and the unintended consequences of success. What began as a civic-minded passion project to help people discover Tacoma quickly turned her into a local public figure and, eventually, a lightning rod for conversations around
Leading As an Act of Community Service with Bennett Peji
After growing up as one of the shyest kids—constantly moving, constantly adapting—Bennett Peji never imagined he would become a leader responsible for bringing entire communities together. From feeling like an outsider to leading large-scale, community-centered design projects, Bennett’s journey is a testament to the power of adaptability, empathy, and intentional growth.This episode of L
Leaders Shouldn't Have All the Answers with Jeff McAuliffe
After decades moving between corporate leadership, consulting, and academia, Jeff McAuliffe has seen leadership from every angle. From sitting at executive tables to building his own consulting practice from scratch, he’s learned that “the top” isn’t a fixed place—and that loneliness shows up in ways most people don’t expect.This episode of Lonely at the Top is about the quiet realities o
Rewiring a Hustle-Driven Nervous System with Lauren Goche
Lauren Goche has cracked the code on something most leaders never admit they need: community. A principal real estate broker, micro-influencer, and self-described love bully, Lauren built her career by staying connected — and then discovered that even she had a chaos habit she didn't see coming. In this episode, she talks with Rachel about the expensive sabbatical lesson that revealed she
Leading Beyond Medicine in a Broken Health System with Dr. Mark Vossler
Dr. Mark Vossler spent 30 years as a cardiologist before most people retire from their first career. He was medical director of cardiac services for a decade, managed physicians, navigated hospital politics, and learned the hard way that medicine is really just people work with better equipment.Then he retired. And got busier.Now he leads Physicians for Social Responsibility, a national o
Belonging in Every Room as a First-Gen Leader with Alfred Fraijo Jr.
He built influence in rooms that were never designed with him in mind.Growing up in Boyle Heights, Los Angeles, Alfred Fraijo, Jr. grew up food insecure in one of LA's most underserved neighborhoods. Now he's reshaping the cities that once failed communities like his. He built a career at the top of a major international law firm, then walked away to bet everything on himself.This episode
Rebuilding After the Breaking Point with Daniel Graham
Dan Graham spent 30 years at Sony, rising from organizing office supplies to managing 150 people, all without the pedigree or resume you’d expect.But his defining leadership moment wasn’t the promotion.It was the day he was called into HR and told he might lose his job, not because the numbers were bad, but because he’d forgotten the people behind them.This episode is about what happens w
Holding Power Without Losing the Human Connection with Dr. Kazique Jelani Prince
In this episode of Lonely at the Top, Rachel sits down with Dr. Kazique J. Prince, psychologist, executive consultant, and creator of the Djembe Card Deck, for a deeply human conversation about dignity, authenticity, and the quiet loneliness that comes with leadership.Drawing from decades of experience advising mayors, CEOs, and change-makers, Dr. Prince challenges the myth that authority
When the Role You Worked For No Longer Fits with Emma Whittard
In this episode of Lonely at the Top, Rachel sits down with Emma Whittard, a former senior executive in global children’s publishing turned transformational coach for women leaders in midlife.Emma shares what it was really like to rise through the ranks at companies like Disney, DreamWorks, and Warner Brothers, including the invisible loneliness of being the only person in the room who kn
Finding Power in Social Capital with Sorby Grant
In this episode of Lonely at the Top, Rachel sits down with Sorby Grant, President and CEO of Climb Hire, an equity-focused workforce development nonprofit supporting underemployed adults in accessing real economic mobility.Sorby reflects on the emotional cost of being the decision-maker, the pressure of stewarding a mission rooted in justice and opportunity, and the quiet exhaustion that
Owning Your Voice in Systems Not Built for You with Michelle Markwart Deveaux
In this episode, Michelle Markwart Deveaux—author, singer, facilitator, coach, and founder of multiple mission-driven businesses— shares her journey from theology and the arts into business ownership, and the often unseen emotional labor of building something meaningful in systems that weren’t designed to sustain creatives. She speaks candidly about self-doubt at high levels of leadership
Meeting Loneliness in the Chipotle Parking Lot with Zach Rehder
In this deeply transformational episode, international teacher and healer Zach Rehder explores what happens on the other side of loneliness.Zach shares how, despite years of seeking, studying, and gathering spiritual knowledge, he still suffered loneliness until an unexpected flood of despair in a Chipotle parking lot forced him into surrender. What he found on the other side wasn’t destr
I Never Want to Be the Boss Again with Sarah Buino
In this raw and deeply human conversation, therapist, consultant, and founder Sarah Buino pulls back the curtain on what it really cost her to build — and ultimately let go of — a thriving group therapy practice. Sarah shares how rapid growth, unhealed trauma, and a crushing sense of responsibility left her completely burnt out, pushed her into residential treatment, and forced her to con
From Engineering to Empathy with Deidre Meacham
Dee Meacham, Senior Vice President of People Solutions, has built her career at the intersection of technology and humanity. From being one of only four women in her engineering class to leading global transformation initiatives, Dee has learned to thrive in the gray—where systems meet people and innovation meets tradition. In this conversation with host Rachel Alexandria, Dee shares how
Leading When You Don’t Fit the Mold with Gwen Bortner
Gwen Bortner has spent her career thriving where others hesitate—inside systems, startups, and boardrooms that weren’t designed for her. As the founder and CEO of Everyday Effectiveness, Gwen has led teams across 47 industries, from tech to telecom to fiber arts, and knows firsthand what it means to stand out at the table.In this episode, host Rachel Alexandria and Gwen talk about being “
How Do Leaders Navigate by Intuition
When you’re at the top, no one can hand you a map. The path forward is yours to navigate, and sometimes, the only compass you have is your own intuition. In this solo episode, host and Soul Medic Rachel Alexandria explores how leaders can learn to trust their inner knowing when logic and strategy fall short. Drawing from her own journey and lessons from past guests, she shares how intuiti
The Cost of Compassion with Ginger Hitzke
In this candid conversation, real estate developer Ginger Hitzke joins Lonely at the Top to talk about what it really costs to lead with heart. A first-generation business owner who went from housing insecurity to building over 2,000 affordable apartments, Ginger shares how she carries the emotional and ethical burden of her work — deciding rent increases, managing cash flow, and being bo
Finding Your Place at the Table with Erin Reeves
In this episode, Erin Reeves, co-founder and principal at Next Level Org, brings over 25 years of executive strategy and HR leadership to an open, grounded conversation about what it really feels like to sit at the decision-maker’s table. Erin shares how each step up the leadership ladder expands not only your view but also your sense of isolation — and how asking better questions can bec
Does Complimenting Yourself Make You a Narcissist?
In this solo episode, Rachel reflects on a listener’s response to Executive Fashion as Armor, Ritual, and Identity with Susana Perczek — specifically the power of hearing a woman speak positively about herself without apology. Rachel explores the generational messages many of us received about “not being too big for your britches” and how those lessons often left us afraid to celebrate ou
Leading When All the Lights Go Out with Megan Gluth
In this episode, Megan Gluth, owner and CEO of Catalynt Solutions, shares her remarkable journey from attorney to industry leader in chemical distribution — and how she doubled the size of her company in just a few years while navigating the chaos of a global pandemic. Raised on food stamps in rural Iowa, Meg brings both grit and vision to her role, blending sharp business acumen with a d
The Real Story Behind Lonely at the Top
In this solo episode, Rachel Alexandria shares the origin story of Lonely at the Top. She reflects on her two decades of work with high performers, the blend of therapeutic, coaching, and spiritual practices she brings to leaders, and the repeated moments that sparked the podcast’s creation. Rachel describes why she felt called to make space for honest conversations about the invisible bu
Every Employee Has to Matter with Louis Fordham
In this conversation with Louis Fordham, Vice President of Human Resources at Engineered Floors, we explore what leadership looks like from the perspective of someone who has spent 35 years guiding executives from inside. Louis shares what it’s like to witness CEOs carry the immense weight of responsibility, why he never aspired to the top job himself, and how isolation is often built int
Trusting Intuition in Uncertain Times with Sunni VonMutius
Sunni VonMutius built her career in corporate tech, often “faith-it-till-you-make-it” in male-dominated spaces, before stepping into leadership coaching. In this conversation, she opens up about the hidden costs of always being the strong one, and the toll it takes when resilience slips into survival mode. Sunni also shares how learning to trust her intuition became vital for navigating u
The Price of Carrying Everyone Else with Alina Doran
In this episode of Lonely at the Top, Alina Doran opens her private ledger to reveal the hidden costs of a career built on constant achievement. From the outside, her leadership journey looked flawless, but inside, she was running on fumes. Alina shares candidly about the toll of being the reliable, high-performing leader who never lets her guard down, and how that survival strategy event
Building Billion-Dollar Change Without Losing Connection with John Valencia
In this episode of Lonely at the Top, Rachel sits down with John Valencia, President and CEO of the Good for Others Foundation. John has raised nearly $1 billion for education and community initiatives, but behind his impressive resume is a leader who understands both the thrill and the isolation of being a visionary.From childhood entrepreneurship to leading multimillion-dollar nonprofit
Lonely at the Top trailer
Trailer for Lonely at the Top
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The Partner Behind the Power with Temi Ayodeji
What happens when you’re married to a powerful, high-stakes leader—and your own emotional labor is quietly consuming you?In this episode, Temi Ayodeji, stress-reduction artist, author, and wellness coach, joins Rachel to share the truth about being the partner behind the leader. From homeschooling a son with special needs while being offered a director role… to quietly donating a kidney t
Executive Fashion as Armor, Ritual, and Identity with Susana Perczek
In this episode of Lonely At the Top, host Rachel Alexandria sits down with Susana Perczek, a corporate stylist and former advertising executive, whose mission is to armor women leaders with both strength and style. Susana shares how she rose through the ranks in a demanding industry, only to face the emotional and relational costs of leadership, especially after starting a family.Through
The Lonely Leap Into Leadership with Angela Quach
Angela Quach, founder of Destiny Lab, gets real about what it took to leave corporate comfort and launch a multi-million dollar, purpose-driven marketing agency. In this candid conversation, Angela shares the invisible costs of leadership — from imposter syndrome to identity shifts — and the resilience it takes to build something bigger than ego. She and Rachel explore what it means to le
