Make Your Damn Bed
Make Your Damn Bed is a daily motivational podcast hosted by Julie Merica. Each episode is around 10 minutes and aims to encourage, inspire, and motivate listeners to get out of bed and start their day. The podcast is intended to be played while making your bed every morning, helping to build momentum and better your life.
Episodes
1833 || lesson on evidence
Where might your current worldview be holding you back from the truth?THE SOURCES:https://en.wikiversity.org/wiki/Evaluating_Evidencehttps://en.wikiversity.org/wiki/Virtues/Humility/Being_99.9%25_Ignoranthttps://en.wikiversity.org/wiki/Exploring_WorldviewsRead Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: w
1832 || awe vs. focus
We shouldn't be seeking focus, we should be seeking reverence. Depth and fulfillment comes from awe. Our culture is obsessed with optimization, but that only disconnects us from our humanity. Focus keeps us. Reverence stops us in our tracks. Awe makes us more generous, loving, connected, patient, and abundant.Create space for awe by staying present and avoiding avoidance. SOURCES: https://www.sci
1831 || strategic anticipation
Our brains are future oriented and this can manifest into anxiety or anticipation if we're not strategic with it. Obviously, our current society has a lot of us focused on survival, which means most of our future thinking is filled with dread and hopelessness. This means we MUST deliberately create anticipation through planning small things that we can look forward to. Looking forward to something
1830 || curse of knowledge
Hindsight is 20/20, but understanding the person you used to be (without the knowledge you have now) is so damn hard. Give yourself some grace in the learning process. You're not stupid, you're learning. SOURCES: https://youtu.be/2y5NfYwoTeo?si=vyyHCtptsSH7zpcjhttps://verybigbrain.com/psychology-thinking/the-curse-of-knowledge-why-experts-struggle-to-explain-simple-things/https://en.wikipedia.org/
1829 || avoiding disappointment in relationships
The squeaky wheel gets the grease. THE SOURCES:https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-squeaky-wheel/202608/why-people-disappoint-us-in-relationshipshttps://psychology-spot.com/cognitive-miser-definitionhttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_misehttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Streetlight_effectRead Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.
1828 || the thinking trap
A policeman sees a drunk man searching for something under a streetlight and asks what the drunk has lost. He says he lost his keys and they both look under the streetlight together. After a few minutes the policeman asks if he is sure he lost them here, and the drunk replies, no, and that he lost them in the park. The policeman asks why he is searching here, and the drunk replies, "this is where
1827 || cognitive misers
the human brain doesn't prefer to expend extra cognitive effort, it will always take a shortcut, where possible. the less you analyze this reality, the more likely you are to fall into "cognitive laziness" which can reinforce stereotypes and keep us trapped in limiting world views. THE SOURCES: https://psychology-spot.com/cognitive-miser-definition/https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_miserRead
1826 || how to forgive (what the science says)
Forgiveness is not an all-or-nothing process. You can partially release by choosing to stop ruminating, and even if you don’t feel entirely at peace yet, it is important to recognize that you have made meaningful progress. Every step you take away from feeling resentment is a step toward your sense of freedom. - Kinga Mnich, PhD 1. Know exactly what you are forgiving2. Commit to forgiving fo
1825 || morality is flexible, actually
if morality is flexible and competence is subjective, how can we build self esteem around our values? Your ability to perceive society as "just" also affects your ability to regard yourself. The more internally motivated you are (outside of systemic expectations) the more you have to rely on competence over community + morality judgements. THE SOURCES: https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article
1824 || the key to self respect
Self respect is a practice, not a vibe. Self respect isn't about the big wins making us feel big, but the small, consistent acts that make us feel like ourselves. The more small, value aligned choices we make, the more respect we earn for ourselves. THE SOURCE: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/social-instincts/202601/why-self-respect-is-so-powerfulRead Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and
1823 || on self respect
Self respect has nothing to do with the approval of others, or reputation, but it is about discipline and honesty and doing the brave thing. Facing accountability is self respect. Assessing risks worth taking and taking them, is self respect. Facing the things you've ignored is self respect. "It is the phenomenon sometimes called alienation from self. In its advanced stages, we no longer answer th
1822 || forgiveness is a skill
forgiveness requires a willingness to move beyond our negative feelings. fortunately, we are predisposed to heal + forgiveness is a big part of that. we just need to create the conditions to allow our natural mechanisms to function. R — Recall the Hurt: Honestly remember the transgression, without minimizing or maximizing it. This is not rumination but a clear-eyed acknowledgment of what happened
1821 || forgiveness for selfish reasons
forgiveness isn't excusing harmful behavior, and it surely isn't forgetting. forgiveness is about your personal healing journey. it's not about absolving them, but instead, it's about reclaiming your agency.THE SOURCE:https://positivepsychology.com/neuroscience-of-forgiveness/https://www.neurologylive.com/view/neurobiology-forgivenessRead Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support +
1820 || premature compassion is avoidance
are you avoiding danger or discomfort?To figure this out you can: name the threatidentify your feelingslearn to identify true threats vs. discomfortpractice responding with a stretch rather than reacting with a snap. rehearse new endings to similar stories It may take some practice to build up your capacity for peace and safety. THE SOURCE: https://www.instagram.com/reel/DbLwPVqOpzH/Read Julie's M
1819 || the self-awareness paradox
Self-awareness is a tool to help you live, not the entire point of living. Every single thing we do, think, and say is a form of spellwork. We are energetic beings who release and absorb energies with every second that passes. Naturally there will be some unavoidable energetic interruptions that we will have no control over, but there are countless forms of energy that we nurture or ignore dependi
1818 || apologies vs. repair
Sometimes the kindest and wisest thing you can do in a relationship is clearly and concisely distance yourself from it until you figure out how to navigate it more appropriately. To develop a robust grief process we must 1. Mourn what is lost. 2. Name what is good. 3. Release what was not. Stepping back, creating distance, and taking space are crucial aspects to the healing process. 
1817 || forgiveness is complicated
Forgiveness doesn’t mean forgetting everything they did and letting them back in. It means you’ve stopped poisoning yourself trying to hurt them.SOURCE: https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/adult-health/in-depth/forgiveness/art-20047692https://envisiontherapydfw.com/forgiveness-isnt-trust-its-releasing-the-burden-they-left-behind/Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Suppor
1816 || trust your wings
“And if happiness should surprise you again, do not mention its previous betrayal. Enter into happiness, and burst.” Mahmoud Darwish https://psychcentral.com/health/when-joy-feels-scary-resilience-building-practices#tipshttps://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/comments/kmz35o/how_did_you_get_over_the_habit_of_constantly/https://www.instagram.com/reel/DZFuUBNgY9npG08L_36uTE6cvYNBGfT3gMxEmU0/Read Julie's M
1815 || access the self
The goal isn't to be constantly regulated, but to understand how to regulate so you can cope with disregulation appropriately. It's about building trust with your healing self, rather than being "healed" fully in some "final" way. SOURCE:https://worthyselfcare.com/why-calm-isnt-the-goal-nervous-system-resilience-is/https://ifs-institute.com/resources/articles/evolution-internal-family-systems-mod
1814 || your true self
Our different parts are there to protect the true self, but these parts aren't static, permanent parts there to keep us from ourselves. Through systems thinking + the multiplicity of the mind, we can integrate these parts to center our selves and allow them to act without interference. SOURCE:https://ifs-institute.com/resources/articles/evolution-internal-family-systems-model-dr-richard-schwartz-p
1813 || Internal Family Systems How To
There are no bad parts, only parts that need to be integrated. SOURCE: https://www.enotalone.com/article/mental-health/therapy/10-tips-to-harmonize-your-inner-world-with-ifs-therapy-r13980/https://www.mentallyfitpro.com/c/free-therapy-worksheets/internal-family-systems-worksheetsRead Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional p
part 2 friction is valuable
This is a re-release. Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie Merica and Make Your Damn Bed
friction is valuable
This episode is a re-release. "This is the economy now. Not a distribution of opportunity. A redistribution of friction. But friction isn’t the enemy!!!! It’s information. It tells us where things are straining and where care is needed and where attention should go.And it's not all bad news. Because friction is also where new systems can emerge. Every broken interface, every overloaded professor,
1812 || Internal Family Systems
In the therapy aspect you tend to work on learning to sit with each of the parts, hearing and respecting their roles, so you can better understand your own system and how to work alongside it. centered self: Compassionate, curious, calm, clear, courageous, confident, creative, connected. Present, patient, playful, persistent, and keeps perspective Exiles: wounded and carrying pain. Aband
1811 || no bad parts
Similarly to the Pixar movie, INSIDE OUT, where her emotions are portrayed as totally different characters that experience different experiences and roles and access different memories. In IFS therapy, they refer to these characters as parts. A majority of your parts will take on protective roles, he uses the example of managers and firefighters, but other parts carry pain or trauma from past expe
1810 || vary some variables
the challenge of the unknown > the disappoint of the familiar you have to change some variables if you're trying a new experiment Study what you avoid. What makes you scared to act. Defensiveness is often protecting you from something you are afraid to face, but if you face it, you may realize your guard being up against it was the biggest hurdle. Leverage your effort into longt
1809 || choosing your flavor of regret
If you look for the beauty in the world, you will see it in everything. The light, the sounds, the smells, the feelings. If you look for the horrors, you’ll see it in everything, too. Focus on the light so you can create and become more of it. Study what you avoid. What makes you scared to act. Defensiveness is often protecting you from something you are afraid to face, but if you face it, yo
1808 || travel shatters the illusions
Travel reminds you that this ISN'T the only possibility. There are other lives available to you. You CAN do things differently. The world is NOT cold, just because the corrupt politicians are. SOURCE: https://college.taylors.edu.my/en/student-life/news/2025/the-neuroscience-of-travel-how-exploring-new-places-rewires-your-brain.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get som
1807 || recalibrate for true motivation that works
Lasting motivation requires three conditions:A sense of competenceA sense of relatednessA sense of autonomy or the felt experience that your actions are genuinely your ownBut there is a difference between consultative decision-making and approval-dependent motivation. In the first, you gather input and then decide, with the locus of commitment sitting inside you. In the second, the decision itself
1806 || practical guide: dealing with heartbreak 2
Don't resist tough emotions, but don't live there. Provide yourself with more time for REST. Don't stress about productivity at this time. Set FIRM boundaries. Allow space and deal with the withdrawal symptoms. Clear + reset your space. Reflect for future you. Reflect on underlying needs that your choices are compensating for. Show yourself the care + empathy you're s
1805 || practical guide: dealing with heartbreak
Don't resist tough emotions, but don't live there. Provide yourself with more time for REST. Don't stress about productivity at this time. Set FIRM boundaries. Allow space and deal with the withdrawal symptoms. Clear + reset your space. Reflect for future you. Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from
1804 || you're a tree, not a billboard
We're trees, not billboards. Understand what YOUR seasons look and feel like, so you can recognize what season you're in and not try to push yourself to a different one, too early. Deante Kyle's Video: https://www.tiktok.com/@deante.kyle/video/7664265185548324126Richard Siken's quote. Psychology Today Article: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/flourish-and-thrive/202602/how-can-patience-help
1803 || identity shift first, take action second
It is really fucking hard to change your habits and your actions while believing everything you currently believe about yourself. It’s more effective in the long run to shift your ideas about your identity first, and allow the actions that align with that identity to support this identity shift. To live “like” the person you want to be, you first have to recognize your capability to do so. If I wa
1802 || learning to love future me
It takes time to get comfortable in unfamiliar frequencies, but once you do, you may find yourself more comfortable than you imagined you could be.Success is a compounding byproduct of motion in the direction of your dreams.Engaging in behaviors you admire will protect you from the feelings you're avoiding.Core questions to ask yourself:What's going on? What are you trying to address? is there som
1801 || goal getting 101 || part 2
Success is a compounding byproduct of motion in the direction of your dreams.Engaging in behaviors you admire will protect you from the feelings you're avoiding.How to (convince yourself to) get anything you want:Identify your goal. (ideally experience based)Identify your current state: values, feelings you'd like to cultivate more of, current habits, current questions.Identify actions that would
1800 || goal getting 101
How to (convince yourself to) get anything you wantPREVIEW:Identify your goal. (ideally experience based)Identify your current state: values, feelings you'd like to cultivate more of, current habits, current questions.Identify actions that would point you in the direction you'd like to move towards.Consider YOUR pitfalls + interests to make it impossible to not do. Get comfortable with friction an
1799 || ready is a choice not a feeling
If it’s not a matter of my physical location, or my circumstances, it comes down to it being a matter of direction. “Simply beginning” is a great sentiment, and an effective practice when possible, but in my case, it’s often better in theory. Most days I don’t know where to begin, let alone how. So, when that happens I try to follow my curiosity. I let tiny cravings speak more loudly if they
1798 || your body isn't a temple
Because that’s the thing for me: the idea of almost everything scares me but the practice often leaves me room to surprise myself. Anthony Bourdain said something like, “Your body is not a temple, it’s an amusement park, enjoy the ride.” And I fuck with that heavy. Like most people, I do better when I have something to look forward to, outside of my daily chores and needs and expectation
1797 || taking up the space that pain once lived
I've been trying not to let myself identify with the pain but it's easier said than done. it's easier when you fill your time with so much good that there is less space for the painful patterns to persist. "if you're trying to love yourself, you already do. where do you think the trying comes from?" Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on P
1796 || I am the ocean
Our emotions are houseguests not permanent residents. I am the ocean. The Hannah Ro Writes QuoteRead Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Suda
sunk costs in relationships 2
(re-release) If you’re struggling to know whether or not you’re falling victim to the sunken cost fallacy in your current relationships, there are some reflective questions you can ask to check in and ensure you’re not settling. Do you feel like you need to stay in your relationships?Or do you feel like you want to stay in your relationships?Do you resent the amount of time or energy you’ve p
sunk costs in relationships
(rerelease) People seem to think because they have invested months or years of time into a person that they shouldn’t give up on the potential for them to change, when their current reality is miserable and undeniably better if they cut ties. I have heard countless friends justify staying too long bad relationships with “but we’ve been together for so long” or “I’ve put so many years into thi
1793 || being chosen isn't evidence of anything
Rejection feels brutal because society taught us our value is in being chosen. What if we deconstruct that premise, together?It's about relief, not romance. It's about validation, not love. "If no one is going to arrive and pick you, you make yourself impossible not to keep. You become useful." - Meredith THE SOURCE: https://aftertheclouds.substack.com/p/the-fantasy-of-being-chosen-and-howRead Ju
1792 || romanticize your own company
Do you know what you'd want to eat next if there was nobody else involved in the decision making process?What would you do if you didn't have to please or consider anyone else?Olivia is Growing's Post: https://www.tiktok.com/@oliviaisgrowing/photo/7639965256235633934Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email
1791 || self neglect didn't make me more lovable
Do you struggle to answer the question: "what do I want?"Do you tend to put other people's needs above your own?Do you think the only way to be loved is through being helpful?Constantly making choices that put other people's needs before your own that force us to abandon our own well-being can slowly erode our ability to understand what we want. It doesn't feel like self-abandonment. It feels like
1790 || empathy without boundaries
a relationship is a space for both of us to breathe, when it no longer creates that space, we must be willing to detach from our expectations.Angela Han: https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZP8ssTnrs/life in focus with suttida: https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZP8sGMw2k/Jay: https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZP8sG6RLT/empathy without boundaries is dangerous and a form of self abandonment. Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JUL
1789 || relationships are spaces for us to breathe
a relationship is a space for both of us to breathe, when it no longer creates that space, we must be willing to detach from our expectations. Angela Han: https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZP8ssTnrs/life in focus with suttida: https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZP8sGMw2k/Jay: https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZP8sG6RLT/Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an
1788: self abandonment in relationships
I tend to neglect myself in relationships so I can focus more on creating peace + wellbeing in others, over my own. A good, healthy relationship will provide space to become more yourself. I have never experienced this. I feel this tendency to erase myself and nurture others with that extra energy. “Love is not staying. Love is showing up. If you cannot stay and show up then what your offering is
1787: my rules for surviving a breakup
don't die. - some days this is finding joy to keep me moving, other days it's simply not dying even though I can't move. don't let shame drive the car. - shame is a violent toddler throwing a very persuasive temper tantrum in the backseat. I have to stop giving that jerk the keys to the car. don't future trip. - if I lost someone I never dreamed of losing I also have to leave space to believe I ca
my tea is scalding: final chapter (the wedding)
He went to a wedding without me. He lied about my dad being sick when people asked about me. He was also regularly asking a woman from work if he could come meet up with her before shifts and after shifts. He had said "I love you" to another woman he sent thousands to for photos. I was devastated. And I spiraled. I hit rock bottom. So I spent a week drilling in. Leaning into the horrors and demons
my tea is scalding: chapter 9 (the coyote returns)
He didn't find it funny, as tricksters rarely do. Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the Sudan Relief FundThe opinions expressed by Julie M
my tea is scalding: chapter 8 (more explicit details)
This motherfucker looked me in my eyes and said I promise there is nothing else that will upset you in here. Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief
my tea is scalding: chapter 7 (the explicit details)
Today's episode is explicit.... but not as explicit as tomorrow's.This motherfucker looked me in my eyes and said I promise there is nothing else that will upset you in here. That... was a lie. Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOU
my tea is scalding: chapter 6 (the coyote: a cosmic trickster)
Coyotes represent a trickster spirit, thank goodness there aren't coyotes in this suburb of Florida. Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamnbedpodcast.comTune in on INSTAGRAM AND YOUTUBE or TIKTOK.Info on War Tax Resistance.Donate to the Palestinian Children's Relief Fund and the
my tea is scalding: chapter 5 (car wash)
I fall asleep ruminating. I wake up ruminating. Things are blinking and flashing on my dash but I can’t figure it out so I just keep trucking. I stop creating. It feels suddenly like math is a farce and chaos and disorder is the only reality. Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.
my tea is scalding: chapter 4 (the math ain't mathing)
“I don’t like it when the math ain’t mathing.“ - KENTHEMANI can do anything temporarily as long as there's hope at the end of the tunnel. The problem is, if I can't see that light? I'm gonna be freaking out until I believe there's hope ahead. Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makey
my tea is scalding: chapter 3 (money problems)
He lost his job and when I asked how much he had in savings he said "nothing." and I realized everything I knew about this man was a lie. But I loved him more than money. I grew up rightfully being called "trailer trash" and struggling to eat anything fresh or unpreserved. I would happily live on the street with this man. Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bon
my tea is scalding: chapter 2 (the cracks)
Today we discuss some of the red flags I missed.I picked my battles carefully and thoughtfully and got a therapist friend to confirm my question: rumination ocd can sometimes disguise itself as intuition. I needed this to be rumination and not true intuition, so I willed it so. Shame is a demon and sometimes she takes over my whole being, so I am working on righting the ship (and not letting
my tea is scalding: chapter 1 (the foundation)
Sorry for the delay, but I'm back... with a very personal story. Mikey has been my BFF since 16. I’m 38. That’s More than half my life.He’s always down for literally anything and will always offer to be the designated driver. He is generous and considerate as hell when he’s trying to be. He was the funniest person I knew before moving to Chicago for comedy and meeting real comics. He’s fun. He’s k
1776 || the default setting doesn't show the full picture
We all worship something, only when we become aware of what we worship can we recognize that the "default setting" isn't always the full picture. There are always alternatives, many of them better than the ones we thought we were stuck with.David Foster Wallace's commencement speech: https://fs.blog/david-foster-wallace-this-is-water/Get Jenny Odell's Books Here.Buy Jenny Odell's book here.Additio
1775 || this is water
We've talked about this speech before, but today I wanted to share the full thing, for context. We all worship something, only when we become aware of what we worship can we recognize that the "default setting" isn't always the full picture. There are always alternatives, many of them better than the ones we thought we were stuck with. David Foster Wallace's commencement speech: https://fs.blog/da
becoming a better manager
NOTE: this is a rerun of episode 1059 because of some life stuff. I should be back tomorrow!If I’ve learned anything from getting older, it’s that we’re all middle managers of our emotions, our energies, our moods, our feelings, and our experiences.I’ve had a lot of different types of managers in the past that have taught me things about how I showed Innman and by recognizing my own capabilities
1774 || the power of "good enough"
You are good enough. You've always been good enough. You'll always be good enough. There's always more to do, but that does NOT mean you haven't done enough. If we started truly believing that, the economy as we know it, would crumble. And I dunno, maybe that's a good thing. Decentering your "beauty" makes you more beautiful. Do you know how much time, energy, and money can be freed up when you sa
1773 || exploit your own margins
Most people have very small margins. There's very little time/energy/money to focus on anything beyond basic survival. But for those of us with access to any margins (even tiny ones), we must be willing to expound upon them, exploit them, and set ourselves up for even larger ones down the line. Get Jenny Odell's Books Here.Buy Jenny Odell's book here.Listen to a different podcast episode about Jen
1772 || protection in the margins
The most successful strikes, boycotts, resistance, and activism has stemmed from people willing to be brave, think differently, and utilize the protection of the margins they're living in. There are certain privileges that some of us are afforded, that can provide us with a "safety net" of protection in our acts of intentional resistance. As more of our safety nets are removed, we are less protect
1771 || dictatorship of capital
We live in a dictatorship of capital. These "powerful" thieves have ingratiated themselves into every aspect of our existence. For us to push back, we'd need to decenter capital, but the system has set us up to be trapped in it. The key is centering community. Not ourselves. There's a "third space" between escaping completely and participating willingly with the worst parts. Co-creating stability
1770 || the harsh reality
As we become more disillusioned, pay attention to the ways you can push back or pivot or adapt. The reality of our current situation is darker than any of us can imagine, and we need to stop pretending like things can "return to normal" because the "normal" has revealed itself to be unreasonably evil. we must be willing to address the truth now, so we can co-create a better truth moving forward. R
1769 || a reasonable response to an unreasonable request
"If the machine of government is of such a nature that it requires you to be the agent of injustice to another, then, I say, break the law." - Henry David ThoreauIn a world that shares none of my values, I must be willing to stand apart from it. It is uncomfortable, but less uncomfortable than assimilating to a culture that is in direct opposition to my personal morality. Ideally, our individual s
1768 || there is a third option
It's not healthy (or "sane") to follow the social norms of an unhealthy (or "insane") society. There is a third (secret) space available for us to boycott, sabotage, and refuse to align with what is wrong with the current "norms" but we have to be willing to look at the world differently to see it. We don't have to decide between escape and compliance. There is a middle ground that can push back a
1767 || contemplate AND participate
Contemplation and participation are not mutually exclusive. We need to create space so we can see reality more clearly and orient ourselves towards what we really want. That said, we cannot renounce the world forever, if we want to be a part of a better one. Get Jenny Odell's Books Here.Buy Jenny Odell's book here.Listen to a different podcast episode about Jenny Odell's book.Read Julie's Medium B
1766 || escape-in-place
The pull to escape is inherent in any of us living in our current hellscape, but what if we escaped-in-place by backing out of the future the ruling class is insisting upon, and instead, tapped into a future of our own creation. Utopia doesn't exist. But a better world is available to those of us who are willing to abandon the current reality that curates harm as a way of control."Peace is an endl
1765 || matriarchy is for everyone
The concept of a matriarchy is far more nuanced and empowering than a basic ass reversal of patriarchal roles. There is a prioritization of balance over dominance, inclusion over exclusion, communal wellbeing over individual accumulation of power, environmental stewardship over endless growth, and a holistic/inclusive approach that considers impact in all areas rather than one. THE SOURCES AND INS
1764 || matriarchy isn't reverse patriarchy
The extent of a society’s development is most clearly reflected in the freedom women enjoy, and in the extent to which they are able to express their creativity. - heide goettner-abendrothTHE SOURCES AND INSPIRATION:The Main Article: Gift Economy https://pediaa.com/what-is-the-difference-between-matrilineal-and-matriarchal/https://www.projectmatrilineal.org/resourceshttps://nativeamericantrib
1763 || the politics of utopia
In the late 60's a bunch of hippie communes popped up across the US, and the ideals were beautiful... but sadly shortlived and often filled with conflict because they focused on escapism instead of true collaboration. If we avoid politics as a way to resist tyranny, we may end up fostering a different form of tyranny. Similarly to the tolerance paradox: Governance can by tyrannical but so can non-
1762 || we are nature + that can save us || imagine a better system
“Stupidity is an attempt to iron out all differences, and not to use them or value them creatively.”“Each such cycle is a unique event; diet, choice, selection, season, weather, digestion, decomposition and regeneration differ each time it happens. Thus, it is the number of such cycles, great and small, that decide the potential for diversity. We should feel ourselves privileged to be part of such
1761 || time banks + mutual exchange || imagine a better system
My friends and I don't "keep score". We help each other when and where we can because we can. This is community. This is the village. We have to decenter "money" exchange where possible, so we can prioritize real care. "Capitalism's incentives are fundamentally backwards. Under this system, you make money by keeping people sick (pharmaceutical companies), by keeping people in debt (financial insti
1760 || community supported agriculture
Today we're talking Community Supported Agriculture (CSA) boxes. Depending on your area, it may be a great way to get fresh food more locally and sustainably, while investing back into your community access points. THE INSPIRATION: https://www.lowimpact.org/posts/replacing-capitalism-the-why-what-how-and-who-of-growing-the-commons-economy/http://localharvest.org/https://newsletters.noticenews.com/
1759 || productivity as maintenance + sustainability
The focus is on repair. There is a necessity of missing out that allows us The focus is on self care. Self preservation. It's also a way to improve and deepen listening. Productivity isn't just producing something new. It's maintenance + sustenance work. It's care work with no "tangible" numbers to track or changes to measure. Get Jenny Odell's Books Here.Buy Jenny Odell's book here.Listen to a di
1758 || time for what we will
The labor movement fought and died for our right to time off to just exist. To do what we will. The gig economy is taking that back with the illusion of "freedom" and I have fallen for it. Get Jenny Odell's Books Here.Buy Jenny Odell's book here.Listen to a different podcast episode about Jenny Odell's book.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over o
1757 || deep listening for attunement
Build an attention holding architecture: where it's safe to simply exist. where you can learn to attune to what matters. Get Jenny Odell's Books Here.Buy Jenny Odell's book here.Listen to a different podcast episode about Jenny Odell's book.Read Julie's Medium Blog.Support JULIE (and the show!)Support + get some bonus stuff over on PATREON.Get an occasional personal email from me: www.makeyourdamn
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