Tired of breaking your promise to go easy on the drinks tonight? You know your nightly habit isn't great for your health or waistline, but it's so hard to say no.
Sound familiar? Then you need Rachel. She knows what it's like to be fed up with your drinking, worried about judgment from others, and turned off by approaches that focus on a higher power instead of brain science.
Learn the exact steps she used to change her relationship with alcohol. Discover how the brain works, the real reason you crave a drink, the key to changing your desire, and how to decide what's right for you.
Create a life that is fun, spontaneous, relaxing, and, most importantly, pleasurable (no buzz necessary).
For her latest free class, visit linktr.ee/rachelhart or check out rachelhart.com for show notes and more.
Episodes
478: I've made so much progress with my drinking. So why doesn't it feel any easier? [Listener Q&A]Jul 21, 202619:38Have you ever wondered why, even though you've made so much progress with your drinking, it still feels like alcohol takes up way too much space in your mind? Tune in this week to learn why feeling stuck doesn't mean you've stopped making progress. You'll hear the difference between drinking less and needing alcohol less, why anticipation and worry can keep alcohol at the center of your thinking
477: Chasing the Sweet Spot with Your DrinkingJul 14, 202614:36Have you ever found yourself trying to hit the perfect buzz? Enough to feel relaxed or more confident, but not so much that you wake up the next morning wishing you had stopped sooner. It's easy to think the answer is simply finding and maintaining your sweet spot, but what if that's not actually possible? This week, we're exploring why so many people chase the perfect buzz and why it can feel
476: Why You Can Always Find a Good Reason to DrinkJul 7, 202625:41Does it ever feel like your brain can always come up with a good reason to drink? Maybe you've had a stressful day. Maybe it's a celebration. Maybe you've been "good" all week. Whatever the situation, the excuse always seems to make perfect sense in the moment. This week, we're exploring a concept called the Rolodex of excuses and why your brain is so good at flipping through one justification a
475: What if you just love drinking? [Listener Q&A]Jun 30, 202617:33Does it feel impossible to change your drinking because part of you genuinely loves it? Listen in this week to learn why the statement "I just love drinking" isn't actually the full story and how getting more specific about what you love can completely change the way you approach the habit. You'll discover why you don't need to convince yourself that you hate drinking in order to drink less, and
474: Stop Waiting for Your Urges to Go AwayJun 23, 202613:38So many people believe they'll finally be able to drink less once they stop wanting the drink. Once the cravings go away. Once saying no feels easy. But what if waiting for those things to disappear is actually what's keeping you stuck? This week, discover why the desire for alcohol isn't the obstacle you think it is and why lasting change doesn't come from eliminating temptation. You'll h
473: Ooh, free drinks! [Thought Swap]Jun 16, 202620:59Why does a free drink feel so much harder to turn down than one you have to pay for? Whether it's an open bar, a complimentary cocktail, or a glass of champagne handed to you at an event, "free" can create a surprising sense of urgency. Suddenly, passing it up can feel wasteful, even when drinking doesn't align with what you really want. This week, we're unpacking how survival instincts, scarcit
472: Why Boredom Makes You Want a Drink (and What Your Brain is Really Craving)Jun 9, 202628:14What if boredom isn't the problem, but the doorway to something you've been avoiding? When drinking becomes your go-to solution for dull moments, quiet evenings, or a lack of excitement, it can seem like alcohol is what makes life interesting. But what if boredom is trying to show you something important instead? Tune in this week to learn how to reframe boredom as a normal human emotion rathe
471: I love the taste of my favorite drink [Thought Swap]Jun 2, 202625:50Does saying no to a drink feel hard because you genuinely love the taste? When alcohol feels tied to pleasure, sophistication, or making an experience feel more special, cutting back can seem pointless or even joyless. After all, why deny yourself something you truly enjoy? In this Thought Swap episode, we're exploring the belief "I love the taste of my favorite drink" through a different lens.
470: My life is good, so why am I drinking too much?May 26, 202611:46If your life is good, why does drinking still feel so hard to figure out? This can be one of the most confusing experiences with alcohol because it doesn't match the usual story people are told about why drinking becomes a problem. When there's no major crisis or obvious unhappiness, it's easy to wonder what's wrong with you. Tune in this week to learn why dissatisfaction is a normal part of b
469: A drink is the only thing that helps [Thought Swap]May 19, 202616:33What happens when alcohol feels like the only way to get relief from stress or discomfort? You're not alone if you've fallen into the trap of thinking that a drink is the only solution, but what if there's a way to handle those moments without reaching for alcohol? In this Thought Swap episode, we'll break down why the belief "a drink is the only thing that helps" can feel so convincing, and how
468: No one will know if I drink [Thought Swap]May 12, 202611:40Have you ever caught yourself thinking, "No one will know if I drink"? It can feel like a harmless solution in the moment, especially when no one is watching and there's no immediate judgment to manage. But the truth is this thought often creates the illusion of freedom while quietly reinforcing a deeper cycle of secrecy, shame, and disconnection. In this Thought Swap episode, we're unpacking
467: I deserve a drink [Thought Swap]May 5, 202613:21How often do you catch yourself thinking, "I deserve a drink"? After a hard day, a stressful week, or when life feels especially overwhelming, this thought sounds completely reasonable. It feels earned, like the drink is a reward you're owed. However, this common justification might be revealing something much deeper about your unmet needs and daily patterns. Tune in this week to hear the hidd
466: Why Focusing on Regrets Won't Help You Drink LessApr 28, 202611:10You know that feeling the morning after you drank too much? Have you ever thought to yourself, "I just don't want to feel this way again"? Regret and guilt can feel like powerful motivators to stop drinking, but the truth is, focusing on what you don't want can actually keep you stuck in the same cycle. If you've ever promised to stop drinking after a rough night, only to repeat the same pattern
465: I wish I could have fun without drinking [Listener Q&A]Apr 21, 202626:06Do you ever feel like you can't have fun at a bar or party without drinking? It can seem like alcohol is the thing that unlocks a more relaxed, confident, and fun version of yourself. And without it, maybe everything feels flat, awkward, or like something is missing. In this Listener Q&A episode, we're unpacking the belief that alcohol is necessary for fun. For some, drinking often feels like th
464: How do I drink less when the world is falling apart?Apr 14, 202612:28How do you drink less when the world feels overwhelming and everything in you says now is exactly the time you need it most? When the news feels heavy and problems feel too big to fix, the urge to reach for a drink can feel completely justified, even necessary. This episode explores what's really driving that urge and why the surface explanation often misses something important. Tune in this w
463: Stuck in the Weekend Drinking Loop? [Listener Q&A]Apr 7, 202616:34Do you ever find yourself stuck in a weekend drinking loop that feels hard to break? It might start with a drink on Thursday or Friday, and before you know it, the pattern carries through the entire weekend. Then Monday arrives, and stopping suddenly feels even harder. In this Listener Q&A episode, we're unpacking a common pattern: why weekend drinking feels automatic and why Monday can be the
462: I know what to do, I'm just not doing itMar 31, 202611:51The thought, "I know what to do, I'm just not doing it," feels like an honest assessment, especially when you've read the books, listened to the podcasts, and still aren't where you want to be. But what if this thought is quietly keeping you stuck in the very cycle you're trying to break? In this episode, we're challenging the belief that you already know what to do when it comes to drinking les
461: One won't hurt [Thought Swap]Mar 24, 202613:47Have you ever found yourself thinking, "One won't hurt"? It seems like a harmless excuse to have just one drink, but if you've experienced it, you know that one often turns into two, three, or more. And in this episode, you'll hear why this thought feels so believable, how it keeps you stuck in the same pattern, and why it's not about willpower, but about seeing what's missing in that moment.
460: I'll be good tomorrow [Thought Swap]Mar 17, 202606:59Have you ever caught yourself saying, "I'll be good tomorrow"? It sounds hopeful in the moment, like you still have everything under control. Another drink tonight is fine because tomorrow you'll finally get it together. But that promise to your future self can quietly keep you stuck in the same pattern. Listen in this week to discover why the excuse "I'll be good tomorrow" feels so convincing
459: When Dinner Prep Turns Into Drinking [Listener Q&A]Mar 10, 202617:37Do you ever feel like cooking dinner just isn't the same without a drink in your hand? You love the ritual of preparing food for your family, but somehow the experience feels flat unless there's wine involved. If that sounds familiar, you're not alone. In this Listener Q&A episode, you'll hear a question from Katie about why dinner prep so often turns into drinking. Discover how the Upgrade ar
458: When Delaying a Drink Doesn't Work (And Why That's Good News)Mar 3, 202617:29Have you ever tried delaying a drink only to feel your desire get stronger? Instead of watching the urge fade, you find yourself staring at the clock, counting down the minutes, convinced you'll drink the second the timer goes off. If that's happened to you, it doesn't mean the delay failed. It means something important just surfaced. Listen in this week to hear why delaying a drink can someti
457: How do I stop going to the bar in the afternoon? [Listener Q&A]Feb 24, 202613:03Why does the pull to go to the bar in the afternoon feel almost automatic? If you've ever found yourself heading out for an after-work drink and wondering why you can't seem to stop, you're not alone. The truth is, the after-work drink works. It changes how you feel fast. And that's exactly why the pattern can feel so hard to break. In this Listener Q&A episode, you'll hear Michael's question
456: Alcohol, Ego & the Fear of Looking WeakFeb 17, 202626:23What's behind the pressure to drink, and why do we feel the need to prove we can handle it? In today's episode, guest coach Patrick Fox is here to discuss how ego and the fear of looking weak shape drinking behaviors, especially for men. While this conversation focuses on masculinity, the themes are relevant for anyone who has ever thought, "I don't want anyone to think I have a problem." List
455: The Power of Delaying a DrinkFeb 10, 202615:16What if changing your drinking didn't have to start with quitting, cutting back, or figuring everything out? For many people, the hardest part of the habit isn't the drink itself, but the moment the urge shows up and feels impossible to ignore. That pressure can make it seem like change has to be dramatic or all-or-nothing to count. This week, you'll learn a deceptively simple shift that can i
454: Why Sports and Drinking Feel So ConnectedFeb 3, 202611:51Why does watching sports without a drink feel like something is missing? Whether you love the game, tolerate it, or just see it as an excuse to get together, alcohol can feel baked into the entire experience. When you start thinking about drinking less, this connection can make it feel like sports, parties, or even belonging itself won't be the same. Listen in this week to learn why sports and
453: Afraid You'll Lose Friends If You Stop Drinking? Listen to This. [Listener Q&A]Jan 27, 202621:13If you've ever worried that not drinking will make you boring, wondered whether your friendships can survive without alcohol, or if part of you thinks maybe you should just have one drink to keep things normal, this episode is for you. In this week's listener Q&A, you'll hear a question from Sean, who fears losing his friendships if he stops joining in with drinking. Tune in to learn why you b
452: Why Fear-Based Motivation and Replacing Alcohol with Food Doesn't Bring Relief [Listener Q&A]Jan 20, 202625:00What if the pressure you're putting on yourself to change your drinking is actually the very thing keeping you stuck? In this episode, I answer a question from a listener named Deb who feels like she's on her last chance to get her drinking under control. She's caught in a familiar loop of replacing alcohol with snacking, and the frustration is palpable. But the real problem isn't the drink or t
451: The Identity Shift That Comes Before Drinking Less [Listener Q&A]Jan 13, 202619:04Do you have a strong desire to change your drinking and yet, you're not where you want to be? In this episode, I'm answering a question from a listener named Chris who's frustrated that he's still drinking more than he wants to, despite trying to make healthier choices. He's switched from hard liquor to premixed cans and is concerned about what his daily drinking is doing to his health. Tune i
450: When Dry January Has Already Fallen to the WaysideJan 6, 202607:56So many of you start the new year with the best intentions to cut back on drinking, only to find yourself slipping up within the first few days or weeks. Maybe you promised yourself you'd cut back on drinking this year, but then life happened. A stressful day at work. An awkward social situation. A craving that felt impossible to ignore. And now your brain is telling you that you've failed, that
449: If You Doubt Your Plan for Drinking Less in the New Year Will StickDec 30, 202507:02If you're feeling more tired and doubtful than inspired about the New Year, especially when it comes to changing your drinking habits, you're not alone. We're sold this fantasy that the New Year is a magical time to create change, but massive change is always built through tiny steps. Instead of trying to figure out how to completely overhaul your drinking habits, I'm proposing something differe
448: Ask Me Anything About Your DrinkingDec 23, 202505:13Have you ever felt like you're the only one who can't get a handle on your drinking? Like all the success and determination you have in other areas of your life just disappears when it comes to alcohol? For years, I carried so much shame about my drinking. I'd go to therapy and talk about everything else in my life, but never broach this topic. When I searched for answers online, everything poin
447: I'm an adult, I can drink if I want to [Thought Swap]Dec 16, 202516:04How often do you find yourself saying, "I'm an adult, I can drink if I want to"? While it's technically true that you're an adult who can make your own choices, here's the deeper truth: this thought isn't really about the drink. Tune in this week to hear why pouring a drink in these moments isn't an act of defiance but actually a distraction, how to identify what you're really rebelling agains
446: I might as well drink because you only live once [Thought Swap]Dec 9, 202513:54Have you ever caught yourself saying "You only live once!" as you reach for another drink? The "you only live once" excuse often gets connected to alcohol in our minds, especially when you're seeking a more fun, adventurous, or unfiltered version of yourself. The challenge is that when your brain links the life you want to lead with drinking, trying to cut back can feel like saying no to being f
445: I'll be more comfortable with a drink [Thought Swap]Nov 18, 202508:46Do you feel more comfortable with a drink in your hand at social events? For years, my solution to social anxiety was simple: head straight to the bar, grab a drink, and feel that familiar wave of relief wash over me as the edges of my nervousness softened. But what happens when that glass becomes less of a choice and more of a requirement for feeling comfortable around other people? Listen in
444: A drink makes everything better [Thought Swap]Nov 11, 202508:54How often do you catch yourself thinking, "A drink makes everything better"? Maybe it's at parties, during vacation, or just unwinding after a long day. Maybe your list of things that are "better with a drink" seems endless. If a drink makes everything better, does that mean not drinking makes everything worse? And if that's true, how can you ever cut back without feeling like you're missing out
443: Liking and Not Liking to DrinkNov 4, 202529:53Have you ever found yourself reaching for that third drink… even though you're not really enjoying it anymore? Or maybe you wake up the next morning thinking, "Why did I do that again? I didn't even like how it made me feel." The tension between drinking and not enjoying it creates a confusing internal struggle. Sobriety coach Adriana Cloud is back this week to explore this common frustration wh
442: The Lie of Sobriety as Self-PunishmentOct 14, 202522:25Ever notice how sometimes choosing not to drink feels less like a positive choice and more like self-punishment? Maybe the commitment was clear in your mind - tonight, no drinks. But then you watch someone order that dirty martini while you sit with your water, and suddenly saying no feels like you're punishing yourself. That familiar tension rises up: the part of you that wants to stick to your
441: When the Label Doesn't FitOct 7, 202535:34Have you ever wondered if you need to wear a certain label to get help with your drinking? Maybe you've thought, "I'm not really an alcoholic, but I don't feel like a normal drinker either." You're not alone. This in-between space can feel incredibly isolating, especially when it seems like the only options are to identify as an alcoholic or keep struggling in silence. But what if the labels we'
440: Awkwardness, Alcohol, and the Connector/Mask TrapSep 30, 202515:13Most people have that one memory that makes them cringe - the party where they said the wrong thing, the meeting where they stumbled over their words, or when a simple "no thanks" to a drink turned into the most awkward moment of the night. You spend so much energy trying to avoid these uncomfortable situations, building elaborate strategies to never feel that squirmy sensation again. But what i
439: Non-Alcoholic Drinks: Safe Swap or Slippery SlopeSep 23, 202530:08Have you ever stood in front of the growing selection of non-alcoholic beverages and wondered if they're a smart choice or a slippery slope? Non-alcoholic drinks are everywhere now: fancy mocktails at restaurants, craft NA beers at the grocery store, entire shops dedicated to alcohol-free spirits. But beneath the surface of this booming market lies a deeper question that many people wrestle wit
438: When It Feels Easier to Pour the DrinkSep 16, 202527:11When you're standing in your kitchen with a craving, there's a moment where pouring the drink feels like the path of least resistance. The familiar routine beckons - no thinking required, no uncomfortable feelings to navigate, just the well-worn neural pathway that promises immediate relief. But what if that sense of ease is actually an illusion? Tune in this week as Adriana Cloud joins me to
437: Finally Something for Me: Invisible Labor and Drinking LessSep 9, 202509:25Ever noticed how that evening glass of wine feels less like a drink and more like a reward? Do you pour that drink and think, "Finally, something for me?" A reward for all the invisible work you do every day. The mental load, the scheduling, the endless to-do lists that nobody else sees. Listen in this week to discover the connection between invisible labor and your drinking habits, and practi
436: The Hidden Script Keeping You Stuck with AlcoholSep 2, 202519:26Society has taught us a script about alcohol that keeps millions of people stuck. The story says you're either a normal drinker who can take it or leave it, or you're powerless and must quit forever. This black-and-white narrative has been reinforced by treatment models and cultural messaging for nearly a century, leaving no room for the possibility of actually changing your relationship with a
435: Why "One More" Never Feels Like EnoughAug 26, 202515:33Have you ever wondered why "one more drink" never quite delivers what you're hoping for? Most people assume that when you keep reaching for more alcohol, it's a willpower problem. But there's actually a psychological and physiological phenomenon at play here called diminishing returns. Tune in this week to hear exactly why "one more" never delivers what you're hoping for, and how understandin
434: How to Let Go of Regret About DrinkingAug 19, 202531:30Have you ever found yourself lying awake at night, replaying all the "stupid" things you did while drinking? That mental highlight reel of moments you wish you could take back, the choices that make you cringe, the decisions that still make you shake your head in disbelief? Regret about your drinking weighs you down like a heavy backpack filled with rocks. You're hauling it around everywhere, co
433: How to Stop Chasing the BuzzAug 12, 202515:46Have you ever tried to chase that perfect feeling? You know the one - where everything feels just right. Maybe it's after that first glass of wine, during a celebration, or in those moments when you're feeling completely confident and in control. And then... it starts to fade. Tune in this week to learn why the buzz fades and how accepting that it's supposed to can completely transform your r
432: I Know It's Not Good for Me but I Love the TasteAug 5, 202511:01The shame spiral around drinking often starts with something that seems completely logical. You know alcohol isn't serving you, yet you still genuinely enjoy it. This creates a mental tug-of-war where you're constantly battling against your own desires, telling yourself you shouldn't want what you clearly do want. Most people spend years stuck in this exhausting cycle, believing that if they ju
431: Why Time Away From Alcohol Can BackfireJul 29, 202522:38The floodgates metaphor captures exactly how it feels when you reintroduce alcohol after a break - like you've lost all control and are being swept downstream. You watch your progress unravel, find yourself right back in old patterns, and wonder why you keep making the same mistakes. This experience leaves many people trapped in an exhausting on-again, off-again relationship with alcohol, convi
430: Why You Go on AutopilotJul 15, 202520:35You've made the list. You have all the reasons why drinking less is a smart choice. You know all the benefits and you really do want to change. So why isn't that enough in the moment? Why does your motivation disappear the second a craving shows up or as soon as you've finished your first drink? Many people spend years believing that their long list of good reasons should be enough to change my
429: The Hidden Difference Between Having Fun and Chasing ItJul 1, 202524:47What's the difference between having fun and chasing it? As kids, most people have a good 15 years of life when they knew how to have fun without a drink in their hand. Back then, your brain had no idea that the perception of fun could be outsourced to something external. You just went out and created your own enjoyment. When you get in the habit of drinking to have fun, you start expecting thin
428: Change Feels Hard Because You're Meant to GrowJun 24, 202533:34When contemplating taking a break from drinking or cutting back, most people focus on how hard it will be. They anticipate struggle, discomfort, and missing out on fun. Our brains are actually designed to avoid hard things. We're wired to seek pleasure, avoid pain, and expend the least amount of energy possible. This motivational triad helped humans survive thousands of years ago when daily lif
427: The Skill of Staying Present Through DiscomfortJun 17, 202526:01Ever felt like you just need a drink to handle discomfort? In this episode, you'll hear how a terrifying bus ride through Alaska's Denali National Park helped me realize that discomfort isn't the enemy – it's the chaos we create around it that trips us up. Through a narrow, winding road perched over sheer cliffs, fear consumed me. I reacted, resisted, and distracted myself, escalating the discom
426: Would You Still Drink If It Wasn't Fancy?Jun 10, 202526:28The hidden influence of "drinking the good stuff" is shaping your relationship with alcohol in surprising ways. As you upgrade your drink choices to fancy wines, craft beers, or top-shelf spirits, you might notice thought patterns around waste and value that are driving overconsumption. Our beliefs about what constitutes "good" alcohol trace back to ancient times, when Greeks first established w
425: Drinking Less in Social SituationsJun 3, 202522:40When you're out with friends and everyone orders drinks, you might have thoughts like, "Well, you only live once. I want to enjoy it!" Despite wanting to drink less (or not at all), you order yourself a drink too. You might think that having more discipline in moments like these would help you resist, but I'm here to tell you that discipline, willpower, and scare tactics aren't the solution. I
424: When Drinking Less Feels Like a FlukeMay 27, 202526:50When someone successfully moderates their drinking or says no to alcohol in situations where they previously would have reached for a drink, they tend to view it as a fluke and go back to worrying about when they'll slip up again. But was it a fluke? As humans, we often attribute our wins to external factors - the circumstances, other people, or pure luck - rather than acknowledging our own role
423: Explaining OverdrinkingMay 20, 202524:47Have you ever woken up after drinking too much and immediately thought either, "I f*cked up" or "I must be f*cked up?" These two seemingly similar thoughts actually reveal deep-rooted societal beliefs about drinking problems that might be keeping you stuck. It doesn't matter your age, gender, education level, or socioeconomic status – these thoughts show up consistently and create major roadbloc
422: What to Do When Temptation StrikesMay 13, 202534:54Have you ever set a firm intention not to drink, only to find your good intentions fall apart later in the day? It's a frustrating cycle that can leave you wondering what's wrong with you. But here's the truth: your good intentions aren't failing because of some personal flaw. They're failing because they're missing a crucial element. On last week's show, you learned why good intentions are just
421: Why Your Good Intentions FailApr 29, 202513:59Do you start each morning with the best of intentions for your drinking only to watch them crumble by evening? That frustrating cycle isn't a sign of personal failure—it's evidence that you're missing a crucial element in your approach to change. The truth is, those morning intentions aren't the problem. They're genuine and meaningful, but when you tell yourself "I won't drink tonight" or "I'll
420: Are Rules the Problem?Apr 15, 202532:17Do you set strict rules about when and how much you can drink, only to break them and feel worse than before? When most people try to change their drinking habits, they immediately look for external parameters—only drinking on weekends, limiting to two drinks, or never drinking before 6PM. But these arbitrary rules completely bypass the most important question: why do you want to drink in the f
419: What Envy Reveals About Your DrinkingApr 8, 202522:08Have you ever found yourself envious of people who seem to drink with ease? If you're changing your relationship with alcohol, envy toward "normal drinkers" might feel familiar—but it also holds surprising insight into how your habit formed, and how you can begin to change it. In this episode, you'll learn how understanding envy helps you uncover limiting beliefs, sheds light on your drink arc
418: Numbing the Noise Won't WorkApr 1, 202531:31Have you ever felt so overwhelmed by your emotions that you'd do anything to forget what's bothering you? In those moments, reaching for a drink—and then another, and another—can feel like the only way to escape. But this pattern of using alcohol to numb difficult emotions creates a problematic cycle that actually decreases your emotional resilience over time. Tune in this week to learn about
417: Why Your Rules Aren't WorkingMar 25, 202516:14Have you ever set rules for yourself around drinking, only to find that they don't work? You have the best of intentions, but somehow you always end up right back where you started. What's going on here? As it turns out, there's a very good reason why your drinking rules aren't effective - and it has nothing to do with a lack of willpower or discipline on your part. In this episode, you'll lea
416: Are You in a Pleasure Desert?Mar 18, 202514:44If you're constantly rushing through your days, checking off endless to-do lists, and using alcohol as a reward, you might be living in a "pleasure desert." When you're constantly focused on getting things done and denying yourself small pleasures, it's no wonder you feel the need to fill your evenings with alcohol. But what if there was another way? Listen in this week to learn why the Reward
415: Why You Go Back to Drinking After Long BreaksMar 4, 202530:13Have you ever taken a long break from drinking, only to find yourself eventually going back to it? So many people find themselves stuck in this frustrating cycle of stopping and starting again, wondering why they can't seem to make the change stick. Listen in to hear one of our Take a Break coaches, Adriana Cloud, explore this common struggle. We discuss how the health benefits of not drinkin
414: How Zooming In Helps You Drink LessFeb 25, 202513:33How often do you declare to yourself, "I'm just someone who…" fill in the blank? Can't moderate your drinking? Has an addictive personality? Is broken and has no willpower? It's easy to turn your frustrations with drinking into sweeping declarations about who you are. But what if these thoughts aren't as true as they feel, and there was an alternative explanation that had nothing to do with you
413: Breakthrough ThoughtsFeb 18, 202518:15Do you ever feel like you're stuck in a cycle of cravings and excuses when it comes to drinking? It's easy to believe that the only way out is through sheer willpower and discipline, but sometimes, all you need is a new thought to prevent yourself from pouring a drink. In this episode, you'll learn four powerful "breakthrough thoughts" that can help you quickly change your perspective on drinkin
412: Inconveniences That Lead to Drinking MoreFeb 11, 202512:07Do you ever find yourself inconveniencing yourself without even giving others a chance to say no to your requests? This habit of not asking for what you want can have a bigger impact on your life than you might think. In fact, it could be contributing to your drinking more than you'd like. In this episode, I share a personal story about how I caught myself falling into this pattern and the re
411: I Can Only Stand This Person if I DrinkFeb 4, 202525:09Do you find yourself reaching for a drink when you're around certain people who get on your nerves? It may seem like alcohol is making the situation more tolerable, but is it really? Sobriety coach Adriana Cloud joins me this week to discuss the common struggle of feeling like you can only stand someone if you're drinking. We explore the underlying boundary and mindset issues at play, and offe
410: Turning Dry January Failure Into SuccessJan 28, 202514:44Did your Dry January not go as planned? Don't worry, you're not alone. Research shows that more people fail at Dry January than succeed. But have you ever considered how every seeming failure might just be the next step on your journey to changing your relationship with alcohol? In this episode, I share a powerful mindset shift that can transform how you approach any goal related to your drin
409: What You Get Wrong About Your CravingsJan 21, 202522:05Do you ever feel like your cravings get out of control? What if you could transform your relationship with cravings from something you dread to something you actually look forward to? In this episode, sobriety coach and hypnotist Adriana Cloud shares a genius analogy that will change how you view your cravings. Listen in to discover how making one simple mental shift can help you more easily s
408: Interview with Sobriety Coach Adriana CloudJan 14, 202542:41Are you mystified by your own drinking behaviors? Do you struggle to understand why you can occasionally easily moderate, while other times you spiral out of control? Sobriety coach and hypnotist Adriana Cloud is here to share her decade-long journey with daily drinking. Although Adriana never identified as an alcoholic, she knew something about her relationship with alcohol felt off. And in thi
407: Stop Putting So Much Pressure on Your Compelling ReasonJan 7, 202531:03So you've got your compelling reason—your rationale to go after change in the face of discomfort. The only problem is, it doesn't seem to be helping you drink less or stop altogether. Is it not compelling enough? Maybe that's part of it, sure (and that is easily fixed, as I'll share). But perhaps you're putting too much stock in that compelling reason. You could be expecting too much from it. In
406: How to Have a Successful Dry JanuaryDec 31, 202430:42It's almost here: Dry January. You know you want to take a break, but you're not sure how. Even worse, maybe you've tried this before and either couldn't stick with it or didn't see any changes. You might not realize it, but your plans to focus on not drinking may be setting you up for failure. Instead, you need to shift your thinking about the substance and focus on becoming a person of substan
405: When Life Is Good but Your Drinking Isn'tDec 24, 202426:44It's easy to see why you might pour yourself a glass of wine when things aren't going your way, but what happens if your life seems to be working out fine? Why are you still reaching for a drink? You've been tricked into thinking happiness must be obtained, which is why, in order to change your actions—using alcohol for quick relief—you must first change how you think. The truth is, negative em
404: Not Liking Your Drinking and Not Enjoying When You're SoberDec 17, 202421:43It's around this time of year that you start thinking about making changes, but what happens when you decide to stop drinking and you're not happy? Is the answer to go back to alcohol or simply settle for a lackluster life? That's what alcohol does to your brain—it applies a thin veneer to a harsh reality. But it may interest you to know that there's a third choice. You can upgrade your life.
403: Drinking and Feeling Like an AdultDec 10, 202428:31If you're taking a break from drinking this holiday season, you might feel like you're stuck at the kids' table at every gathering. The reality is, we have been socialized to view alcohol as a sophisticated, adult activity. Those thoughts—implanted by TV, movies, and marketing—create desire and fuel a vicious habit cycle. Tune in to explore how your brain learned to outsource certain beliefs a
402: Why You're Drinking Past "Enough"Dec 3, 202428:35Picture this: You and a few friends have decided to split a bottle of wine. Everyone fills their glass, but there's still a little left in the bottle. You can probably guess what happens next. But did you know that the decision to finish the bottle might not actually be your own? It may be a pair of mental blocks preventing you from tuning in to the sensation of having had enough to drink. Lis
401: Why You Shouldn't Demonize AlcoholNov 26, 202420:38"Alcohol is poison." "It's toxic—why would I put it in my body?" These are common refrains from people who quit drinking. But are they helpful in reshaping your relationship with alcohol? Humans have used alcohol for centuries to alter how they feel. Demonizing it or treating it as entirely good or entirely bad can block you from deciding its role in your life. In today's episode, I explore wh
400: When People Give You a Hard Time About Not DrinkingNov 19, 202428:06You've been there: You're with friends, and you're doing your best not to drink (or stop after one), and suddenly you're met with resistance. A lot of feelings bubble up. What do you do next? It can be challenging to say no in certain situations, and setting rules or restrictions isn't going to help. Instead, you must learn to manage those feelings that arise to change your relationship with alc
399: Why Counting Drinks Can BackfireOct 15, 202420:24Counting drinks is a common strategy that many people use to try to drink less, but it can often backfire and leave you feeling frustrated and ashamed. While it can be a useful awareness-raising tool in the beginning, relying on external rules and numbers disconnects you from your own inner authority and doesn't address the unconscious desires driving your drinking. Instead of trying to become