Soberful
Veronica Valli and Chip Somers, experts on recovery with nearly 50 years of combined sobriety, share their stories, mistakes, and occasionally helpful advice about living an alcohol-free life. The podcast is aimed at anyone who wants to quit drinking, is struggling to get sober, or is already in long-term recovery. Each episode draws on their personal experiences and professional insights to offer honest, relatable guidance.
Episodes
363: Resentments
"Resentments are the number one offender." In this episode, Chip and Veronica discuss the nature of resentments, how they are like drinking poison and wanting the other person to die. How they seduce us into staying stuck and block us from growing. They confess their own resentments and the methods they use to get free of them. To learn more, visit the show notes.
362: Anxiety, Panic Attacks & Sobriety
Have you fever felt anxious? Have you ever used alcohol to deal with social anxiety? You are not alone. Anxiety and problems with alcohol go hand in hand. We drink to take the 'edge' off and get through social situations, but the booze just makes everything worse. You may have even experienced a full-blown panic attack. Veronica suffered from extreme anxiety and regular panic attacks throughout he
361: Why People Relapse
Why do people find it so hard to stop drinking? What leads to a relapse? Veronica and Chip answer all these questions and give their opinion on what risky situations to avoid in early recovery. To learn more, visit the show notes.
360: The Four People You Meet When You Stop Drinking
When we get sober, the world takes it personally. There are four types of characters you may meet when you stop drinking: 'The overnight addiction expert, 'the drunk persuader, the 'moving the goalposts friend,' and the 'fun police.' Chip and Veronica talk you through how each one will approach you, what they will say, and how you can deal with them. To learn more, visit the show notes.
359: Adult Children of Alcoholics
In this episode, Chip and Veronica discuss Adult Children of Alcoholics (ACOA). ACOA's have particular characteristics that they carry into adulthood, particularly in their intimate relationships. To learn more, visit the show notes.
358: Can I Drink In Moderation?
The Holy Grail of anyone with an alcohol use disorder is moderation. In this episode, Chip and Veronica look at why moderation (or social drinking) is very rarely achievable. We discuss the energy and effort that people put into trying to achieve it. The reason that we struggle with moderation is because of the perception that alcohol can benefit us when the reality is very different. To learn m
357: The Normalization of Abnormal Drinking
We discuss how the alcohol industry has tricked us into believing alcohol is harmless and beneficial to us. And how they have convinced us that without alcohol we are missing out on something. We challenge the myths and assumptions that have lead to the normalization of abnormal drinking. To learn more, visit the show notes.
356: Veronica's Story Part 2 - Healing
The biggest challenge Veronica faced was dealing with romantic relationships. At 3 years sober she was suicidal again. With nothing left to lose she had to find a way to deal with old demons and stay sober. To learn more, visit the show notes.
355: Veronica's Story Part 1
In this episode, we cover Veronica's story. How she became an alcoholic, what happened, and what led her into sobriety. To learn more, visit the show notes.
354: Chip's Story Part 2 - Healing
*Trigger warning* Discussion of overcoming childhood sexual abuse. How do you heal from abuse and trauma? Can you overcome childhood abuse and go on to have a happy life and fulfilling relationships? Chip explains exactly how he did that. To learn more, visit the show notes.
352: Chip's Story Part 1
*Trigger warning* Discussion of childhood sexual abuse. In this episode, Chip tells his incredible story of recovery. He grew up in an upper-class British family with no love or warmth, was abandoned to a boarding school at age seven where he was bullied. By 18 he was sticking needles in his arms. He spent time in prison and five days on life support. Listen to his amazing story of transformation.
352: The Summer Sessions
In this episode of the Soberful podcast, Veronica Valli discusses the challenges of staying sober during the summer, a season often associated with fun and drinking. She shares personal experiences and insights on how to navigate the summer without alcohol, emphasizing the importance of understanding the difference between the fantasy of drinking and the reality. Valli encourages listeners to embr
351: When Your Drinking Crosses the Line With Sus Silvius
In this episode of the Soberful podcast, Veronica Valli interviews Suze Silvius, who shares her extraordinary journey from a troubled childhood in Canada to her struggles with alcohol and eventual path to recovery. Suze discusses her early relationship with alcohol, the emotional angst she felt throughout her life, and the pivotal moments that led her to seek help. She reflects on the impact of he
350: Getting Sober and Finding Purpose with Ian Young
In this episode of the Soberful podcast, Veronica Valli interviews Ian Young, a long-time friend and colleague in the treatment industry. Ian shares his incredible journey from a troubled youth in North London to a life of addiction, counterculture, and ultimately recovery. He discusses his experiences with drug smuggling, political activism, and the challenges he faced with family dynamics. Ian r
349: The Difference Between Recovery and Sobriety With Randy Haveson
In this episode of the SoberFull podcast, Veronica Valli interviews Randy Haverson, who shares his remarkable journey of sobriety spanning over 42 years. Randy discusses his early struggles with addiction, the turning point that led him to seek help, and the profound difference between simply being sober and being in recovery. He emphasizes the importance of emotional sobriety, self-discovery, and
348: The Truth About Emotional Sobriety Nobody Tells You
In this episode of the Soberful podcast, Veronica Valli delves into the often overlooked concept of emotional sobriety, emphasizing its critical role in maintaining long-term sobriety. She shares her personal journey, highlighting the challenges of emotional management after quitting alcohol and the importance of developing emotional skills. Valli discusses practical strategies for achieving emoti
347: What is a normal drinker?
What is a normal drinker? This is a question most people ask themselves on their journey to sobriety. The truth is that how we drink is shaped by our peers and culture. To learn more, visit the show notes.
346: How Patricia Heaton Quit Drinking and Changed Her Life
Patricia is a three-time Emmy Award-winning actress known for her work in The Middle and Everybody Loves Raymond. She has been alcohol-free for eight years and has just launched her alcohol free brand Solubrae. (Use code Soberful20 to get 20% off) Patricia shares her inspiring journey of going alcohol-free, the cultural influences on drinking, and how it transformed her life. Discover practical i
345: How a Little Becomes a Lot
In this insightful interview, Eric Zimmer shares his transformative journey from heroin addiction to sobriety and discusses his new book, 'How a Little Becomes a Lot.' The conversation explores the power of small, consistent actions, the nature of change as a skill, and how our perceptions shape our reality. Perfect for anyone interested in personal growth, addiction recovery, and meaningful life
344: Travel With the Sober Single Mum
Explore the transformative journey of Lauren Brunesson as she navigates life from Northern Ireland to global adventures, embracing sobriety and self-discovery. This episode delves into cultural insights, the power of intuition, and the rise of sober travel communities. Join us for an inspiring conversation on overcoming addiction and living a holistic, adventurous life. To learn more, visit the
343: Quitting Smoking With Dr. Judy Rosenberg
In this insightful interview, Dr. Judy Rosenberg discusses the deep-rooted psychological causes of smoking and vaping, emphasizing the importance of addressing childhood wounds and emotional dysregulation to achieve lasting change. Discover how addiction is linked to the hole in the soul and learn practical strategies to break free from these habits. To learn more, visit the show notes
342: Addiction, Trauma and the Older Population
This conversation explores addiction, trauma, and mental health issues in the older population, highlighting the unique challenges and societal perceptions faced by those over 65. Polly Kaiser shares her extensive experience working with older adults, addressing topics like ageism, substance misuse, and the importance of narrative therapy. To learn more, visit the show notes.
341: How Much Does America Really Drink? With Mike Marshall
In this episode of the Soberful podcast, Veronica Valli interviews Mike Marshall from the US Alcohol Policy Alliance. They discuss the pervasive influence of alcohol in society, the power of the alcohol lobby, and the need for better public health policies regarding alcohol consumption. Mike shares his personal journey of sobriety and highlights the significant harms associated with alcohol, inclu
340: How to Heal Your Body When You Stop Drinking With Samantha Lander
In this conversation, Veronica Valli and Samantha Lander discuss the journey of recovery from addiction, focusing on the importance of health and nutrition in sobriety. Samantha shares her personal story of addiction, the challenges she faced, and how she transitioned to a healthier lifestyle. They explore the impact of substance use on hormonal balance, the role of nutrition in recovery, and the
339: How to get Emotionally Sober
Veronica Valli discusses the journey to emotional sobriety, emphasizing the importance of consistent personal development, boundaries, managing resentments, and reprogramming the subconscious mind. She shares practical insights and invites listeners to a two-day immersive training to master emotional sobriety for lasting well-being. To learn more, visit the show notes.
338: What is a Dry Drunk?
Veronica Valli discusses the concept of 'dry drunk' and emotional sobriety, exploring how emotional regulation and personal development are crucial for lasting sobriety and a fulfilling life. She shares insights on emotional unwellness, control issues, and practical tools for emotional sobriety. To learn more, visit the show notes.
337: How to Help Your Addicted Child With Brenda Zane
Brenda Zane started Hopestream community after years of trying to save her son from desperate drug addiction. She discusses the resources parents need when they have a child struggling with addiction and provides hope when those parents feel like they are the only ones going through this. To learn more, visit the show notes.
336: Black Out Drinking
What is blackout drinking, and when is it a problem? To learn more, visit the show notes.
335: How to Grow Roots in Sobriety
Veronica explains how to grow roots in sobriety. To learn more, visit the show notes.
334: From Homeless to Millionaire With Brandi Jones
In this episode, Veronica chats with Brandi Jones, a woman she considers to be one of the most impressive people she has ever met. Listen in as Veronica learns unknown parts of Brandi's life story that leave her both horrified and in awe of this incredibly inspiring woman. To learn more, visit the show notes.
333: The Truth About Porn About Porn Addiction With Jeremy Lipkowitz
Jeremy Lipkowitz joins Veronica to discuss his descent into porn addiction, how it made him depressed and isolated, and how he now helps other men break free. To learn more, visit the show notes.
332: Is family estrangement the answer?
In this episode, Veronica and Chip delve into the complex topic of family estrangement and the concept of going no contact. They explore the importance of boundaries in relationships, the impact of emotional well-being on family dynamics, and the cultural implications of severing ties with kin. The conversation highlights the necessity of learning skills to navigate difficult relationships while e
331: There's Always Stuff to Deal With
In this episode of the Soberful podcast, hosts Veronica Valli and Chip discuss the significance of sobriety milestones, particularly Chip's 41 years of sobriety. They explore the ongoing journey of recovery, emphasizing the importance of emotional growth, personal development, and maintaining connections with others. The conversation highlights the necessity of support systems and frameworks for l
330: Things That Changed Our Lives This Year
In Veronica and Chip's traditional end-of-year episode, they discuss all the things that changed their lives this year. To learn more, visit the show notes.
329: How to Deal With Anger in Sobriety
Chip and Veronica discuss how anger manifests in sobriety. What lies beneath anger? Is it purely fear? How do you manage your own anger and that of others? To learn more, visit the show notes.
328: Dealing With Feelings in Sobriety
Veronica and Chip respond to a listener's question and talk about how to manage all the new feelings you experience in sobriety. To learn more, visit the show notes.
327: A 6 day alcoholic coma DIDN'T stop her drinking! with Kate Lewis
At 32 years of age, Kate Lewis was grappling with alcohol withdrawal, and she had a severe alcohol fit. This led to her being placed in a medical coma for six days. Surprisingly, this didn't halt her drinking. It was the subsequent events that finally put an end to her alcoholism. Kate, now a published author, joins the podcast to share her story and discuss the two books she wrote. These books, a
326: The Sober Mom Life with Suzanne Warye
When Suzanne went into blacked out drunk with a 3-month-old baby, she knew her drinking had passed the point of no return. She had spent years trying to moderate and manage her drinking to no avail. Now, her mission is to spread the word about how fun and freeing sobriety can be. To learn more, visit the show notes.
325: Uncorked - What Happens When You Put the Drink Down With Mary Alice Stephens
Mary Alice Stephens loved alcohol; she drank every day and made sure her social life was full of opportunities to drink. Coming from a large Irish Catholic family, drinking was normalised and celebrated. She joins Veronica to discuss what happens after you put the drink down. To learn more, visit the show notes.
324: Dealing With Difficult People
Veronica discusses the universal challenge of dealing with difficult people in our lives. She emphasizes that understanding the emotional unwellness of others can foster empathy, while also highlighting the importance of maintaining boundaries and managing expectations. Veronica provides insights into how to respond to difficult individuals from a place of emotional regulation, rather than reactin
323: Regaining Trust
Chip joins Veronica to discuss how to regain trust when you get sober. They discuss regaining the trust of your children and partner. Trust is something sacred and when broken it takes time and patience to earn it back. To learn more, visit the show notes.
322: Filling the Void That Alcohol Filled
Veronica and Chip discuss what it feels like when you first stop drinking. At the beginning, it feels like a void with loads of time to fill. Over time, sobriety creates purpose and meaning, and you wonder that you ever had time to drink. To learn more, visit the show notes.
321: The Gifts of Emotional Sobriety
In this episode of the Soberful podcast, Veronica Valli discusses the concept of emotional sobriety, emphasizing its importance in maintaining long-term sobriety. She outlines the core skills necessary for achieving emotional sobriety, including setting boundaries, effective communication, and dealing with resentments. Veronica highlights that emotional sobriety is a lifelong practice that leads t
320: A Clean Mess with Tiffany Jenkins
Tiffany Jenkins has lived many lives; she is a mom, comedian, and best-selling author. And she is also a former drug addict who went to jail whilst dating a cop. Tiffany found herself pregnant in the first few months of sobriety. With raw humour and honesty, Tiffany speaks about the messy truths of sobriety and getting sober. To learn more, visit the show notes.
319: Codependency with Kate Grey
Veronica speaks with family therapist Kate Gray about the complexities of codependency, emotional boundaries, and the impact of family of origin on adult relationships. They explore the journey of healing from codependency, the importance of recognizing unwanted behaviors, and the role of parenting in emotional development. Kate shares her BEND method for teaching boundaries and emphasizes the sig
318: Drunk Love with Melissa Stoeltje
Veronica interviews Melissa Stolje, author of 'Drunk Love: A Marriage Under the Influence.' Melissa shares her journey of sobriety, the impact of alcohol on her marriage, and the challenges she faced in recovery. The conversation delves into the complexities of addiction, the healing of relationships, and the rediscovery of joy and fun without alcohol. Melissa emphasizes the importance of honesty,
317: Do I need a sponsor to get sober?
Veronica Valli explores the concept of sponsorship in sobriety, particularly within the context of 12-step programs. She discusses the importance of finding a suitable sponsor, the qualities to look for, and the role of sponsorship in the recovery journey. Additionally, she addresses the need for discernment in choosing a sponsor and highlights alternative support systems outside of 12-step progra
316: How to Treat an Eating Disorder With Brittany Davis
In this episode of the Soberful podcast, Veronica Valli interviews Brittany Davis, Regional Director of the EMILY program, discussing the intricate relationship between eating disorders and substance use. They explore the complexities of treatment, the role of family support, the impact of trauma, and the societal pressures surrounding body image. Brittany shares insights on individualized treatme
315: Bad Drunk with Millie Mackintosh
In this episode of the Soberful podcast, host Veronica Valli speaks with Millie McIntosh about her journey to sobriety, the impact of alcohol on mental health, and the challenges of parenting while sober. Millie shares her experiences with binge drinking, anxiety, and the importance of community in recovery. They discuss the role of self-compassion in healing from shame and the power of sharing pe
314: What Comes First Addiction or Mental Health With Stephanie Marquesano
In this episode of the Soberful podcast, Veronica Valli speaks with Stephanie Marquesano, founder of The Harris Project, a nonprofit dedicated to addressing co-occurring disorders. Stephanie shares her personal journey following the tragic loss of her son, Harris, to an accidental overdose. The conversation delves into the complexities of co-occurring disorders, the importance of prevention and ed
313: The Redemption of a Mormon Drug Dealer With Sean Hemeon
In this episode of the Soberful podcast, Sean Hemeon shares his extraordinary journey from a troubled upbringing in a strict Mormon household to becoming a successful actor and author. He discusses his struggles with addiction, the challenges of coming out as gay, and the transformative power of sobriety. Sean reflects on his experiences as a drug dealer, the consequences of his actions, and the p
312: Dealing With the Consequences of Our Drinking
In this episode of the Soberful podcast, hosts Veronica Valli and Chip discuss the various consequences that arise after getting clean and sober. They explore the emotional, financial, and social repercussions of addiction, emphasizing the importance of community support and acceptance in navigating these challenges. The conversation highlights the need for honesty and the role of personal growth
311: What Sobriety Is and What It Isn't
In this episode of the Soberful podcast, Veronica Valli discusses the complexities of sobriety, emphasizing the importance of understanding what sobriety truly means. She distinguishes between complete abstinence and harm minimization, explores the concept of recovery, and addresses the common issue of cross-addiction. Valli also highlights the significance of emotional sobriety as a crucial aspec
310: People Pleasing Will Get You Drunk
Veronica discusses the detrimental effects of people pleasing on sobriety and emotional health. She emphasizes that getting sober involves not just abstaining from alcohol but also addressing emotional sobriety, which includes understanding and overcoming people pleasing behaviors. Valli explains how these behaviors often stem from childhood experiences and the belief that one is responsible for o
309: Celebrity, Addiction and Redemption With Jonathan Schwartz
In 2016 Alanis Morissette discovered that her business manager had embezzled $4.7 million of her money. Jonathan Schwartz was at rehearsals with Beyonce when he realised that his six-year addiction and gambling problem had been discovered. Jonathan is a former wealth manager to the stars who went to prison for his crimes. He is now sober and this is his story back to humility and redemption. To l
308: How do I know if I should stop drinking?
Chip and Veronica discuss all the signs we ignore as we wrestle with the fact that alcohol may no longer be our friend. To learn more, visit the show notes.
307: Why We Need to Forgive With Dr. Frederic Luskin and Lyndon Harris
Veronica is joined by two forgiveness experts who share the power of forgiving. To learn more, visit the show notes.
306: Dealing with Rejection
Rejection stings. When we feel rejections it's often because of experiences in the past. Learning how to deal with rejection is how we get emotionally sober. To learn more, visit the show notes.
305: Rediscovering Grace with Rev. Dr. Ben Gosden
Ben Gosden is a pastor and alcoholic. He was the 'cool' pastor, the one who went for a couple of beers. What people didn't see was all the secret drinking. He joins Veronica to discuss how the 12-steps reignited his faith. To learn more, visit the show notes.
304: Surviving Divorce with Karen McMahon
Karen McMahon is a coach for people in high-conflict divorces. She talks through why divorce is an invitation to grow and change so you don't repeat the mistakes with the next person. To learn more, visit the show notes.
303: Sobriety Is a Shift in Perception
Veronica shares why she thinks perception is essential to staying sober. That how we see the world is not necessarily how it is. We can't stay sober if we believe the best way to have fun is to drink. To learn more, visit the show notes.
302: Losing Yourself with Sasha Tozzi
Sasha Tozzi joins Veronica to talk about how lost she was before getting sober at 26. How cocaine brought her to her knees and how she is navigating life as a sober woman and contemplating having a family. To learn more, visit the show notes.
301: Why Friendships Matter More Than Anything With Dr. Kimberly Horn
Veronica has an in-depth conversation with Dr. Kimberly Horn on how friendships are essential to our wellbeing. They discuss how to navigate friendships, how to end friendships and how they can change in sobriety. To learn more, visit the show notes.
300: The Power of Your Story Meghann Perry
Veronica is joined by Meghann Perry who is a powerful storyteller. After battling her way out of addiction she turned her passion into a business. Meghann uses storytelling to help others find their truth. To learn more, visit the show notes.
299: Not Everything Is a Trauma
We may get some pushback from some people about this episode. But we feel that therapy language has escaped from the therapy rooms and is being over used and abused in all the wrong ways. Not everything is a trauma and struggle is part of life. To learn more, visit the show notes.
298: Getting Sober With Four Kids
Veronica interviews a former client who had four kids under the age of eight. Annie was drinking every night and working full time. When her daughter saw her drunk one night she knew she had to change. To learn more, visit the show notes.
297: Sobriety Is the Journey Back to Yourself
When we have an alcohol problem we leave ourselves by degrees. One day, we wake up and realise that we have become someone we don't recognize. Sobriety is about the journey back to who you really are. To learn more, visit the show notes.
296: Breaking Free of Sugar Addiction With Mike Collins
In this mindblowing conversation with Mike Collins Veronica learns how sugar addiction takes hold of us, how sugar affects our thinking, emotions and keeps us in active addiction. Do not miss this one. To learn more, visit the show notes.
295: Things That Changed Our Lives This Year
Chip and Veronica's traditional end-of-year episode where they discuss the things that changed their lives this year. Chip gives an update on some health issues and reveals what he is having for his anti-Christmas dinner. To learn more, visit the show notes.
294: Balance and Blending with Angela Anderson
Angela is a coach for female entrepreneurs who are trying to balance all the things their lives demand of them. Angela talks about how balance is almost impossible and that we need to blend our needs each day. To learn more, visit the show notes.
293: Using Alcohol to Fix Being Neurodivergent With Ali Press
Ali Press is a counsellor who specialises in helping neurodivergent people get sober. Ali didn't realise until she got sober that a lot of her struggles were because of being neurodivergent and how understanding this can provide great clarity and relief while navigating the sober world. To learn more, visit the show notes.
292: Claiming Sobriety With Filmmaker and Director Diane Bell
Diane Bell is an independent filmmaker and director whose first movie made a splash at the Sundance Film Festival. Born in Scotland into a big drinking culture, she could never conceive of a life without alcohol in it, until one day she woke up and realised how much better she felt without it and how much culture (including Film and TV) misleads us into believing alcohol was glamourous and excitin
291: Fear Is the Engine That Drives an Alcohol Problem
Veronica explores how fear is the engine of an alcohol problem and how all humans experience fear. But no one talks about fear, we hide it deep inside of ourselves. She outlines some simple methods you could try to manage your fear and how the work of sobriety is learning how to manage our fear. To learn more, visit the show notes.
290: The 12-Steps for Skeptics With Arlina Allen
Arlina Allen has been sober for thirty years and has written a book that clears up a lot of the misinformation about 12-step programs. They discuss the difference between the fellowship and the program and the common blocks people experience when trying to work the 12 steps. To learn more, visit the show notes.
289: Autism and Sobriety with Dr. Ben Walden
Dr. Ben Walden joins Veronica to delve into the complexities of sobriety for individuals on the autism spectrum. Dr. Walden sheds light on the challenges of diagnosing autism, a topic that often remains in the shadows. He stresses that new research is constantly emerging, keeping the audience informed and aware. Dr. Walden also discusses the integral role of community and group work in addiction r
288: Think you are too young to get sober?
Veronica is joined by a former client who got sober in one of her programs when she was 29. Now, two years later, she talks about how much her life has changed and how great her sobriety is. Creating community and connection was vital for her sobriety to become sustainable. To learn more, visit the show notes.
287: Hormonal Changes and sobriety with Bria Gadd
Bria Gadd is the 'period whisperer', a certified holistic health coach she helps women navigate the peri menopause and the hormonal transitions women go through. She explains how women get themselves into 'health debt' and how women can manage the supply and demand of energy. And of course, one of the best ways to get out of health debt is to stop drinking alcohol. To learn more, visit the show n
286: Pain Management and Sobriety
Veronica and Chip discuss the serious issue of pain management and sobriety. How does someone in recovery navigate pain management if they need to take opioids for pain relief? What are the pitfalls? How does someone in recovery navigate pain management? They share their experience and advice. To learn more, visit the show notes.
285: Sex Addiction, Shame and Betrayal with Duane Osterlind
Duane Osterlind is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist who specialises in helping people overcome sex addiction. He explains that sex addiction is a way to get connection and intimacy but remains unfulfilling and compulsive. Duane explains that it's essential to understand how shame factors into sex addiction and that dealing with shame is crucial to recovery. He also talks about how it affec
284: The Process of Early Sobriety
Early sobriety is a unique experience, not to be judged or assumed as a reflection of the long term. Veronica shared her insights into the processes that unfold in the first year. The physical changes, the brain's self-repair, and the emotional processes are all part of this unique journey. To learn more, visit the show notes.
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