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Coming Out & Beyond  Support for Women Questioning Their Sexuality Later in Life

Coming Out & Beyond Support for Women Questioning Their Sexuality Later in Life

Anne-Marie Zanzal 1ac1f670-c17c-11f0-806a-ef1502adef07 181 Episodes Jul 24, 2026

Coming Out & Beyond is a podcast for women questioning their sexuality later in life. Hosted by Anne-Marie Zanzal, a Yale Divinity School graduate and LGBTQ+ coach who came out in midlife, it offers real conversations and emotional clarity. Topics include late bloomer experiences, being married with kids and questioning, faith deconstruction, divorce, grief, and identity shifts. The podcast provides grounded support for women coming out after 30, 40, 50, and beyond.

Episodes

The Firefly Journey: What the Research Tells Us About Coming Out Later in Life
The Firefly Journey: What the Research Tells Us About Coming Out Later in Life Jul 24, 2026 52:21 What if the single biggest factor in whether we come out, when we come out, and how we heal along the way is the community around us? Dr. Mallory Hanfling returns to the show, this time with research in hand. Mallory recently completed her PhD in human sexuality, and her dissertation explored how community mitigates the impact of compulsory heterosexuality on the Firefly experience, the journey of
The Boy Who Skated Anyway: Stef Vachon's Story
The Boy Who Skated Anyway: Stef Vachon's Story Jul 17, 2026 40:45 Content note: This conversation includes language that references homophobic slurs and a discussion of suicidal ideation and mental health struggles. Please listen with care, and reach out for support if you need it.What happens when the thing you love most is the very thing the world tells you is wrong?This week we sit down with Stef Vachon, a proud queer man, husband, father, keynote speaker, an
Real Talk on Sapphic Dating and Relationships
Real Talk on Sapphic Dating and Relationships Jul 10, 2026 55:08 It is the second Friday of the month, which means Anne-Marie is joined by dating coach Barbara Rowlandson and Nashville photographer Tonda McKay, to talk all things sapphic dating and relationships. This month the trio takes on four real questions from women navigating the queer dating world. How do you slow down when every connection turns intense within weeks? Are you a jerk for losing interest
🏳️‍🌈Allyship That Truly Matters
🏳️‍🌈Allyship That Truly Matters Jul 3, 2026 51:09 When you come out to someone, you learn very quickly to tell the difference between the half embrace and the full embrace. The half embrace turns the conversation back to your husband, your children, your family system within the first thirty seconds. The full embrace simply asks, how are you doing.In this episode, Anne-Marie sits down with frequent guest Anna Empey for a tender and honest convers
Finding a Self I Couldn't Name: Part 2 - Dahron Johnson's Story of Coming Out as Trans & Learning to Trust Her Inner Voice
Finding a Self I Couldn't Name: Part 2 - Dahron Johnson's Story of Coming Out as Trans & Learning to Trust Her Inner Voice Jun 26, 2026 44:27 In Part 2 of this conversation, Anne-Marie Zanzal continues her talk with Dahron Johnson, a trans woman, advocate, lifelong cyclist, and chair of the Metro Human Relations Commission in Nashville, who came out in her late forties after decades of quietly knowing.Dahron shares the rush of the days right after she realized a change had to be made, from calling care providers within 48 hours to playi
Finding a Self I Couldn't Name, Part I: Dahron Johnson on Faith, Advocacy, and Making Room for More of Us.
Finding a Self I Couldn't Name, Part I: Dahron Johnson on Faith, Advocacy, and Making Room for More of Us. Jun 19, 2026 43:53 Dahron Johnson grew up surrounded by voices. Thousands of books in her parents' home, two people who met in divinity school, and a faith that taught her every person is fearfully and wonderfully made. And still, for decades, she could not find the words for who she was.In this episode, Anne-Marie sits down with her dear friend Dahron, a clinically trained chaplain, a tireless advocate, and the fir
Your Sapphic Dating Dilemmas, Answered with Love (and Zero Filter)
Your Sapphic Dating Dilemmas, Answered with Love (and Zero Filter) Jun 12, 2026 47:17 This month we return to our lesbian dating and relationship conversation, the one we share on the second Friday of every month, and by popular request Tonda is back at the table! Anne-Marie is joined by her wife, Tonda McKay, our longtime out lesbian and resident truth teller, and by Barbara Rowlandson, fellow coach and the woman who helps lead our Authentically Us community. Together we work thro
Grieving the Living: The Estrangement No One Prepares You For
Grieving the Living: The Estrangement No One Prepares You For Jun 5, 2026 42:29 TW: This episode includes honest discussion about grief, estrangement and suicidal ideation. Listener discretion is advised. There is a kind of loss that arrives without a funeral. No casserole on the doorstep, no card in the mail, no ritual to mark it. It is the loss of people who are still alive, of communities that keep meeting without us, of the versions of ourselves we performed for decades.
Loving Someone Newly Out: Tonda McKay's Story of Falling in Love With a Later in Life Lesbian
Loving Someone Newly Out: Tonda McKay's Story of Falling in Love With a Later in Life Lesbian May 29, 2026 54:54 In this revisited Season 5 favorite, Anne-Marie sits down with photographer Tonda McKay, who also happens to be her wife. Tonda came out at eighteen as a good Southern Baptist girl whose prayer partner became her first love, and she has spent the decades since building a life as a long-out lesbian in the South. She shares what those early years held: the isolation of believing she was the only one
Twice Out, Once Home: Keith Aron on Sexuality, Gender & the Long Way Back to Yourself
Twice Out, Once Home: Keith Aron on Sexuality, Gender & the Long Way Back to Yourself May 22, 2026 54:21 This week on Coming Out & Beyond, Anne-Marie sits down with Keith Aron (he/they), a trans and queer transformational coach, writer, proudly witchy weirdo, and self-described honorary tree. Keith writes the Substack Big Blue Sky Dragonfly, where he explores the sweet spot between belonging and authenticity — and his story is one Anne-Marie has been wanting to share for a long time.Keith came ou
Hurricane Lessons: Betrayal, Becoming, & Coming Out Later in Life
Hurricane Lessons: Betrayal, Becoming, & Coming Out Later in Life May 15, 2026 45:30 A decade ago, Anne-Marie and Katrina Anne Willis met inside a small Facebook group that no longer exists — a quiet corner of the internet where women who had Googled "late in life lesbian" found each other. They were both raising kids. Both married to men. Both trying to understand a feeling they didn't yet have language for.This week, they finally meet face to face.Katrina is the author of Hurric
The Surprise Truth About Sapphic Sex: What Nobody Tells You Before You Get Here!
The Surprise Truth About Sapphic Sex: What Nobody Tells You Before You Get Here! May 8, 2026 59:10 A woman in our community wrote in and asked: "What if my lesbian sex experience doesn't live up to the hype? Does that make me not gay?"That question deserved more than a one-line answer. So Anne-Marie brought in two of her favorite humans to tell the truth — the kind of truth nobody hands you before you get here.Her wife Tonda McKay has been out for forty years and brings the long view: what the

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