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Coming Out & Beyond  Support for Women Questioning Their Sexuality Later in Life

Coming Out & Beyond Support for Women Questioning Their Sexuality Later in Life

Anne-Marie Zanzal 1ac1f670-c17c-11f0-806a-ef1502adef07 181 Episodes Oct 9, 2026

Coming Out & Beyond is a podcast for women questioning their sexuality later in life. Hosted by Anne-Marie Zanzal, a Yale Divinity School graduate and LGBTQ+ coach who came out in midlife, it offers real conversations and emotional clarity. Topics include late bloomer experiences, being married with kids and questioning, faith deconstruction, divorce, grief, and identity shifts. The podcast provides grounded support for women coming out after 30, 40, 50, and beyond.

Episodes

You Look Great for 200! Celebrating Our 200th Episode and National Coming Out Day
You Look Great for 200! Celebrating Our 200th Episode and National Coming Out Day Oct 9, 2026 56:36 Content note: this episode includes discussion of conversion therapy and religious trauma.Two hundred episodes. We still can't quite believe it either. To celebrate this milestone, and National Coming Out Day, Anne-Marie Zanzal gathers three of her all-time favorite guests around the mic: her wife Tonda McKay, coach and therapist Barb Rowlandson, and coach and business consultant Anna Empey.Anne-M
Coach vs. Therapist? Knowing What You Need
Coach vs. Therapist? Knowing What You Need Oct 2, 2026 47:20 What is the difference between a coach and a therapist, and how do you know which one you need? Anne-Marie Zanzal welcomes back her frequent guest and longtime business coach Anna Empey, owner of Business Inspired Solution, for an honest conversation about the kinds of support available to women coming out later in life.Both women have spent years in therapy, and both are clear that it matters. Th
Starting Over in the Sapphic World
Starting Over in the Sapphic World Sep 25, 2026 58:20 This week on Coming Out & Beyond it is the three of us again: Anne-Marie, dating and relationship guide Barb Rowlandson, and Anne-Marie's wife and resident realist, Tonda McKay. Twice a month we set the dating talk to the side and answer the questions that come in from all of you. This time they gathered around one tender thing, which is how you actually step into queer community when you are
The Best Sex of Your Life Can Come After 50
The Best Sex of Your Life Can Come After 50 Sep 18, 2026 58:54 Note for Listeners: This episode contains explicit language and conversation about sex and sexual pleasure. Listener discretion is advised.What if the best sex of your life is still ahead of you?In this episode of Coming Out and Beyond, Anne-Marie Zanzal and dating coach Barbara Rowlandson sit down with Susan Bratton, the intimacy expert to millions and one of the most prolific and widely read sex
Should You Run? Unfiltered Sapphic Dating Advice
Should You Run? Unfiltered Sapphic Dating Advice Sep 11, 2026 52:02 This month on Coming Out and Beyond it is our monthly dating and relationship show, and Anne-Marie is joined by her co-coach Barbara Rowlandson, a psychotherapist and dating coach, and her wife Tonda McKay. Before the questions, the three of them catch up on a summer of kayaking, wineries, and a 2,500 mile road trip through Michigan that somehow ended without a single argument. Anne-Marie and Tond
🚩 The Signs We Only See Now: Were We Ever Really Straight?
🚩 The Signs We Only See Now: Were We Ever Really Straight? Sep 4, 2026 42:00 This month's episode with Anna Empey is the one we have all earned after a tender chapter of heavier conversations. It is lighter, there is a lot of laughing, and it is about the signs. Not the ones we noticed at the time, but the ones we can only see now, the ones that were quietly flashing the whole time while we went about our lives.Anne-Marie and Anna compare notes on the intense friendships t
Straight Women Don't Lie Awake Wondering if They're Gay
Straight Women Don't Lie Awake Wondering if They're Gay Aug 28, 2026 51:22 This is the start of something new. The episodes you have told us you love most are the ones where the three of us sit down together, so we are making them a monthly gathering. Once a month, Tonda, Barbara, and I will open the letters and answer the questions women are actually asking: the real ones, the tender ones, the slightly awkward ones, and the ones you would only ask us at two in the morni
Coming Out at 39: When the Puzzle Pieces Finally Fit
Coming Out at 39: When the Puzzle Pieces Finally Fit Aug 21, 2026 41:53 Some mornings change everything. Marissa Mitchell was 39, a teacher and army veteran in southern Indiana, married to her junior high sweetheart and quietly certain that the distance she felt in her marriage was a problem she could fix if she only tried harder. Then one ordinary morning, about a week into summer break, she woke up understanding something that reordered her whole life. She was in lo
High Libidos, Straight Girl Crushes & Coming Out Later
High Libidos, Straight Girl Crushes & Coming Out Later Aug 14, 2026 46:14 It is the second Friday of the month, which means Anne-Marie is back with the company she loves most: her fellow coach Barbara Rowlandson and her wife Tonda McKay. This is the monthly conversation so many of you tell us is your favorite, where we take the real questions women ask about sapphic dating and answer them with honesty, humor, and a lot of love.This month we open four questions from the
How to Stop Letting Fear Run Your Life
How to Stop Letting Fear Run Your Life Aug 7, 2026 31:57 What if fear is not a stop sign but a signal that you are growing?In this month's first Friday conversation, Anne-Marie is joined by regular guest Anna Empey, business development consultant and LGBTQ+ coach, for an honest look at fear. Not how to get rid of it, because we cannot, but how to stop letting it make our decisions for us.Together they explore why the brain works so hard to keep us in o
Compulsory Heterosexuality and Coming Home to Yourself (Originally Aired Season 5)
Compulsory Heterosexuality and Coming Home to Yourself (Originally Aired Season 5) Jul 31, 2026 45:00 This week we return to one of our most beloved conversations from the archives, my talk with Dr. Mallory Hanfling, a fellow later in life queer woman, therapist, and the creator of the term Firefly. Mallory shares her story with such honesty. She married a kind man, built a genuine friendship with him, and still felt that something was quietly wrong. Like so many of us, she searched everywhere for
The Firefly Journey: What the Research Tells Us About Coming Out Later in Life
The Firefly Journey: What the Research Tells Us About Coming Out Later in Life Jul 24, 2026 52:21 What if the single biggest factor in whether we come out, when we come out, and how we heal along the way is the community around us? Dr. Mallory Hanfling returns to the show, this time with research in hand. Mallory recently completed her PhD in human sexuality, and her dissertation explored how community mitigates the impact of compulsory heterosexuality on the Firefly experience, the journey of

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